10K budget wedding Please Help!

[benanabred]

This site was extremely helpful to me when i had my engagement ring made and I am really hoping I can get some great insite on my wedding planning - - That said, I got engaged in Versailles, France and have a small budget for a wedding I am trying to plan for this September. My guest list would be around 50 and I have always wanted a laid back pretty but relaxed wedding all in one place outdoors in a garden. I live in NJ have looked high and low in NJ, NY and just cannot find what I am looking for in the metropolitan area! Everything is either a typical wedding hall or a super chic expensive place.I started looking to CT and newport and found some great spots but they were more for larger weddings off 100+. I then started to thing of either a super small 25 or less destination wedding back anywhere in France or renting a house for the weekend in the Hamptons and have a 50 person wedding there. I am a designer so I feel confident I could be creative and put flower arrangements together, figure out table linens, etc. Does anyone have any input or guidance they could give me as far as my ideas and any helpful resources like vednors, personal experiences, etc for either idea?????

 

[havernell]

I''m not sure how helpful this will be, but I when I was looking at venues, I remember that there were quite a few small historic inns, B&Bs, and other such places in the Lambertville, NJ/ New Hope, PA area. A lot of them have pretty gardens and will let you bring in a tent for a small reception. I''m not sure of the cost for these places (and I''m sure costs vary venue to venue), but it might at least be an area where you could look. Holly Hedge Estates was one name that I remember- I think they had a pretty courtyard where you could hold the ceremony.

I hope others chime in with some ideas! Good luck!

 

[Winslet]

There was a thread recently on smaller weddings in the Hudson Valley. I''ll go look for you and then post the link.

 

[Winslet]

Here you go: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/gummibear.113123/

Read carefully, they mention a lot of places! And congrats and good luck to you

 

[Gypsy]

Okay well, unfortunately many of my suggestions may not work for you.

Have looked in Spring Lake, NJ? I remember there being a couple of places there that were lovely and pretty affordable.
Does it have to be September? Because that's wedding high season. If you can do it another time of year... like November, you would be able to get more bang for the buck.
Don't do a Saturday wedding... Sunday or Friday are usually less expensive for venues, plus photographers, etc. miight give you a discount.
Have you considered a brunch wedding? You can limit alcohol to mimosas and sparkling wine and scew drivers and bloody mary's. Do it buffet style without any raised eyebrows, can get out of having a band or even a DJ if you don't want one (you can just have someone play your first dance song when you cue them).
Your dress... are you a size 6-8? If so hit Neiman Marcus Last Call around Elizabeth for a dress-- SAMPLES are made to fit you.
Unless it's included in your package, don't do wedding cake. Do cupcakes, pies, other desserts. Or do a small cake for cutting and sheet cakes in the back.
Photography costs a bundle. I would post on theknot local boards for photographer recommendations.
Don't do flower centerpieces. There are some gorgeous willow branch and crystal/ribbon centerpieces. Consider those as you can buy the materials in bulk and store them. You can also hot glue silk flowers to them and they will look like the are budding. They look amazing.
BORROW from friends. Purses, jewelry, transportation for the day of the wedding from someone with a nice car.
Stationary... print your own. Print it at Kinkos, buy the paper/ stuff yourself.
DSW for bridal shoes. Consider gold, silver shoes instead of white. Metallics are easier to find and can be re-worn.
EBAY.
And KEY if you are a designer and have anything you can trade... TRADE for services. If you can design monograms, web pages, anything you will find that some vendors will trade services with you.
Make your own personal flowers.
Keep your bridal party to a minimum. The larger your bridal party the more you have to spend on them. It adds up.


Second, keep a very detailed excel sheet of all your expenses with a running total and put everything in there.

 

[benanabred]

Thanks for all the input so far...I live 5 mins outside of NYC so some of the reccomendations are a bit too far for me and my friends and family. Renting a house in the Hamptons during September seemed feasible since it is off peak season and the Hamptons is not too far and is a vacation spot and somewaht would feel a bit destination without the travel. I also like the beachy relaxed feel of it there as well. some people had posted awhile back a few things on the Hamptons and someone said they were having their wedding at a house and looking ofr a caterer there but there wasn't any info past that....If I can't afford that or a place not too out of reach I was thinking of just going back to France and doing something super small, intimate and special in that case with immediate friends and family....Has anyone ever done either of these ideas or something like it or know someone that has?

I am a size 2 so unfortuately the Last Call aT Neiman Marcus may not work for me.... Do they ever have sizes smaller than the 6-8 range? I did happen to find a dress atelier in NYC that had a sample sale and is having another one in July at 60-75% off so there's a good chance I would be able to get a dress there or possibly another sample sale. One fortunate thing going for my small budget is since the economy is so lousy a lot of great things are on sale and discounted that don't normally happen!

 

[Gypsy]

I wouldn''t do the Hamptons. Any place that is very high income will have EVERYTHING in the area priced accordingly. You might be able to find a home to rent, but a caterer will still cost a lot of money in a high income location--rentals will too and so forth. And people''s ideas of ''reasonable'' will differ. What is reasonabe in the Hamptons, not so much someplace else.

 

[tropiqalkiwi]

I live across the country, but what I found to be the biggest goldmine of venue spaces was the park district.

If you are looking for a garden-y venue, I would check out whatever public parks you have in the area and see if they are rentable. Also look into public arts centers and historic buildings, you might be surprised at what''s available (and not advertised .

 

[MakingTheGrade]

I'm having my reception in a restaurant, which helps save on cost in terms of staffing, renting, decorating AND I know the food will be top knotch It might be an option for you if you don't mind being a little off beat. If I was getting married in Baltimore, I would have been tempted to rent out the floor of a "Magic" bar in the city whose decor I love (and the bartender is a magician, lol).

You can also look into schools, many universities have gorgeous campuses and small historic buildings that they will lease out for weddings. You just need to have some connection to the school, like a friend who is an alumni who is in the wedding party or something.

Some conservatories/museums/art museums have nice wedding spaces as well, which are ideal for smaller weddings. And would make for a very unique wedding.

If you need help, I'd enlist some of your local friends to just spend a weekend exploring the city Go on a website like citypaper and read some reviews of cool places, and call them up to see if they offer space for a small wedding. You'd be surprised how open businesses might be to something like that, especially in this economy.

I'm having a under 10k wedding on a Saturday in August, it hasn't been too bad. I did a lot of diy in terms of invitations/paper stuff, painted my caketoppers, very simple flowers. My dress was custom made (not necessarily as pricey as you think), and found a great deal of a photographer by going through the countless craiglist ads, lol. My centerpieces are simple: drowned orchids and willow branches in a bubble bowl, only $10 a piece. And again, saving a bundle on decor and rentals since the reception is in the restaurant.

Don't worry, it's totally doable!

Centerpiece:
http://image001.mywedding.com/11/224/11224226_475.jpg?1211949893

My photographer lives in upstate NY, don't know what her travel policies are, but she's from NYC I think, and I think she's very talented, and a steal (8 hours for 800$, all pics edited and on a CD, and might include an assistant photog).
http://samanthalauren.wordpress.com/

 

[rhbgirl24]

I live in NJ and am doing my wedding at The Mansion on Main Street in Voorhees NJ. This may be a bit out of that price range though.

However, did you contact the event planner for Grounds for Sculpture? They do some awesome small events at Rat''s restaurant, and if you''ve ever been there its the perfect garden/lake location!

Doesn''t hurt to ask about it...

http://www.groundsforsculpture.org/
http://www.groundsforsculpture.org/RatsRestaurant/index.html

Good luck. - NJ is hard - its one of the most expensive places in the US.

 

[zipzapgirl]

If you are in NYC, go to RK Bridal for your dress. It''s not really a relaxing experience (they''re not going to coddle you, bring your mom a cup of coffee or take an appointment), but they have everything at great prices. They carry lots of great lines like La Sposa and San Patrick. Wedding Atelier and some of the more boutique-y places only have dresses $2500 and up.

Regarding RK Bridal, my advice is to do lots of research on styles you like and come with a list. They''re not always so helpful at figuring out what you want and searching things out unless you prod a bit and/or have very specific requests. And try to avoid Saturdays--I know, easier said than done.

Also, I am getting married in Italy and could give you advice on that if you want. We''re doing a villa on the coast of northern Italy, near Portofino. I am not sure about France, but I think the UK and Ireland have been building up quite a stock of package wedding deals in manor houses and castles. And there are a ton of options for weddings in Tuscany.

Avoid the wedding planner.
You sound quite comfortable in Europe, so you could avoid the cost of a wedding planner. Really, you only need to find a caterer or venue and they will likely have a list of photographers, bands/DJ''s, florists, etc. My fiance and I are doing everything ourselves with the help of an Italian friend to translate.

 

[elrohwen]

The Hamptons is probably much more expensive than you're expecting. I'm having 50 people as well and a house in the Hamptons was $20k-100k for a just a short weekend. Definitely not cheap! (and that was just the house; no food or anything included)

 

[jstarfireb]

I would think about going to the Catskills instead of the Hamptons. My friend had a beautiful wedding in the Hudson Valley at this venue:
Twin Lakes resort

I''m not sure how much it cost, but they''re pretty frugal (a grad student and an artist). They had an outdoor ceremony by the lake and an outdoor reception under a wooden pavilion in July on a Friday evening.

 

[CNYHopeful]

Benenabred, congratulations on your engagement!

A couple of questions:
*Is the $10,000 budget for everything - gown, reception, flowers, invites, etc; or primarily for reception & ceremony?
*Is anyone else contributing to it?
*Where in the Metro area are you and how far are you willing to travel?

My sister and brother-in-law planned their wedding at Bretton Woods Inn in Morris Plains, NJ - not far from Morristown. They put their wedding together there in 4 months time while living & working in Chicago. The food & service was wonderful and accomodated their plans for an outdoor wedding. The actual day of their wedding was very rainy and cold, but the staff did a marvelous job of moving everything in doors and they got married in the beautiful lobby. They provided my sister with her own personal suite. I also know there are several options for dining depending upon size, so I'm sure they could accomodate 50 guests.

www.brettonwoods.net

I hope the link helps you develop ideas. Unfortunately, they don't offer rates on the menus, but it's worth asking their staff.

 

[Clairitek]

Once I read "Newport" in your opening post I knew I had to jump in.

FI and I looked at this place called 41 North. Its right on the water and the decor inside is so very simple. Wide-board wood floors stained honey, pale pale pale blue walls, windows all around and a deck around 3/4 of the place. The furniture is a little on the modern side with sort of sea-side touches in the accessories (not not Boca Raton beachy) and a few lovely leather couches set up in a lounge feel. The place is two rooms so you could eat in one room and mingle/dance/drink in another. It will be handicap accessible as they are going to be put in an elevator if that matters.

Also, if you want the realllllly laid back feel there is a picnic pavilion in a park in Jamestown, RI (right next to Newport). The park is called Fort Getty. I had actually designed an entire wedding around this place back when I thought I wanted a clambake. Its really rustic (red painted picnic tables/benches) with a cement floor but its literally a few feet from the water with a beautiful view in any weather. It has a roof and its super cheap to rent. I can even give you my list of clambake companies if you are interested in that or recommend a caterer from that area. I wrote a thread on this vision if you feel like delving back into my older threads. There are some pictures of the pavilion in there. If you are interested in this I can dig up the contact information for the woman who deals with renting the place out.

Finally I''ll tell you about the place that I''m having my wedding dinner. We are having 35 people at the restaurant in the Hotel Viking. They even have a little non-denominational chapel in house if you need that. In addition to the restaurant they have some function rooms that are pretty nice. The Colonnade Room has windows and its own bar and the decor isn''t the beachy casual feel you mention but I felt it was fairly tastefully done.

Well sorry for rambling. I spent countless hours planning so many variations of my wedding there so I suppose I was just busting to share my findings with someone. I also spent a good amount of time searching around Philly if that''s another area you are interested in.

 

[benanabred]

Elrohwen, what was the size of the house you are renting... is it during off season? How much are you finding catering to be? I could reduce to 40 people possibly.

 

[benanabred]

So many great ideas! Thank you guys! So far I glanced at the 41North place and the Rats Restaurant i and they both look great. The photographer for 800 sounds like an amazing deal too! I had a very late work night so haven''t had a chance yet to investigate more of the ideas on here, but so far I have a very good starting point! I would love to get more info for sure also on the Italy wedding. I would prefer France and can speak french but that is so insightful that someone else has done it on an inexpensive budget and others too!

 

[benanabred]

ZipZap girl, I would love for you to give me any advice possible on exploring a wedding in France.

 

[RoxyLady]

I''m not sure if this place will let you do the reception there, but it''s beautiful!

http://www.arboretumfriends.org/weddings.php

My boyfriend and I would like to have a small wedding (75 people) and I agree it''s so hard to find a place that works with a smaller guestlist. They all seem to be typical wedding halls and want 150+ people or it''s going to be crazy expensive.

A lot of times, it ends up being cheaper to go with a place that can offer you tables, linens, etc. Renting all that stuff can get expensive.

We are going to look at the Highlawn Pavilion and Bernards Inn in a few weeks. I know they work with smaller numbers. Highlawn Pavilion has city views and outdoor space. Bernards Inn is very close to the Arboretum. Also, I think Perona Farms is not too expensive and accommodates smaller parties.

Other obvious NYC option is in Central Park. You may want to look into New York Botanical Garden. You have to use Abigail Kirsch, but they may allow smaller parties.

Finally, not outdoors, but Alger House in NYC is a unique option for smaller weddings.

Hope this helps! Good luck!

 

[zipzapgirl]

Just to give you a little more detail on our wedding...
We are getting married at a villa on the coast
http://www.villadufoureventi.it/

They will set up for the ceremony and their partner caterer is providing all linens, table floral arrangements, cocktail hour, three course meal, wedding cake and open bar. We''ll have about 50 guests. We have a DJ, photographer and a florist to do the ceremony flowers (bouquets, bouts and a flower arch). The great thing we found is that when you have a dinner, they include everything from the linens to the alcohol to the dessert--no nickel and diming!

All in, the wedding will run us about $18k, not including flights to get over there (we''re considering that the start of the honeymoon

)

We didn''t look at any places in France, but here was basically our process.

1. We picked the region we wanted. Better not to pick a large city, because that ups the price. Pick a lovely region you''ve been to before and know is beautiful. Provence comes to mind. Normany has quite a few B&B Chateaux catering to the Brits, so that''s also a thought.

2. Search wedding planner sights for suggested places. Most of the time they''ll try to be vague on their websites "a lovely villa outside of X overlooking the sea" and you can do enough searching on the internet and googlemaps to figure it out. Also, look for wedding photographers and their sites usually have some ideas. Type in French wedding photographer and you''ll see what I mean. Here''s one example www.ianjohnsonphoto.com

3. Use your French and start calling places. Pump them for information ("I saw your castle, but I am not sure if it is too large for my intimate wedding. Do you have a small courtyard, or any other ideas?") Caterers are really good at this part. If they think they''ve got your business, they will give you lots of honest feedback. Search google, search bridal websites, search everything! Look at hotels for options, B&B''s, historic houses, etc.

4. Consider renting a villa or house for a week. It seems pretty pricey at first, but usually you can have family or friends stay there for the same or cheaper than a hotel and then you have the place all to yourselves. This is a more DIY option which might require rentals, so be careful about it!

5. Once you have a place or a caterer, ask for their suggested list. Keep leveraging off one party to find out references for others. This applies to all weddings by the way!

6. I''d suggest getting married at the courthouse in the USA and having a "symbolic ceremony" abroad. otherwise you''ll be dealing with paperwork in French and visiting government offices. With that said though, there are many very lovely wedding offices in Europe (sometimes in the very villas and castles themselves!) and this could be a good solution if you want to go a bit easier on the dinner at a restaurant. Just be sure to check the fees. When they know that there are tourists coming for weddings, they see it as a good source of tax revenues!


I''d give you a ton more advice, but I''m getting married in less than two weeks, so things are at crunch time!
Good luck with whatever you choose!