It's My Turn...Deciding on Men's Wedding Band

[sledge]

Most of you know about my journey to pick the "perfect" ring for my girl.

Apparently it's my turn now and I'm taking a little time to figure out what I really want. I know many of you will gasp -- but as much as I love diamonds for my girl, I am not certain I want one (or any) in my ring.

I'm limiting the search to white or grey metals. No white gold. My chemicals erodes away the rhodium plating to fast and I don't want the headaches and/or expense of re-plating.

No issues with platinum, palladium, tungsten (white or normal), titanium, stainless steel, etc. However, since I'd like to keep my costs low, I suspect it will be an "alternate" metal so I don't have to pay the premium.

Oh yeah, I need to get measured but think I'm an 11 to 11.5 ring size. My initial thoughts was that a 6mm band would look about right. Also, I don't mind the ring having a little weight to it. In fact I prefer it to be a little thick & heavy as opposed to something "dainty".

Lastly, I prefer something with a strong masculine look to it. Here are some various styles I've seen that I like.


Ring 1:
Maybe my favorite. Haven't seen a ring using a combination of wood & metal. Love the imperfectness of everything and the Latin meaning of the wood. Although maybe the finish on Ring 2 would be better? Seems fitting for a wedding ring. Love the play on strengths as well, as my own belief is I am supposed to bring strength to the marriage.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/276039...7968a477359e36245ce5c1f93bd97de82e1:276039034

It's Latin name, Lignum Vitae, translates as the "Tree of Life".

Long known as the hardest timber in the world, Ironwood has incredible strength, only matched by its beauty.

Ironwood has been used in both aesthetic and utilitarian endeavors for centuries. From ornate carvings to pulleys for hoisting, it's strength is unmatched.

This design pairs the hardest natural metal in the world, with the hardest natural timber.

Ring 2:
Awhile back I stumbled upon this awesome ring from PS forum member @SeekingClarity. This is one of a VERY few rings where I might consider a diamond. Love the finish of the ring also.

https://www.pricescope.com/communit...-ring-and-heirloom-oec-floret-pendant.235182/

Ring 3:
Love this one too. While I like the darker look. I could really see this with a white metal in the center strip. Similar to Ring 11 below. Plus this is by DK, who did my girl's e-ring and will be doing her wedding bands as well. Seems almost justified in some ways.

https://www.davidklassjewelry.com/bands/black-zirconium-ring

Ring 4:
Very simple, but I also really like the simplicity and cleanness of this one. Think it may be too thin for my finger. The finish work is great. Not really wanting sterling silver, but unsure the exact metal type to get that same color.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/545223...dding-band-in-matte?ref=unav_listing-other-57

Ring 5:
Similar to the above. Same concerns about the width. Would likely go palladium 950 for the metal type. Like the fact it's got a subtle hammer look, color and matte finish.

Originally found this in 4mm, but just found an updated link for 4-8mm widths.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/271343391/mens-hammer-textured-wedding-band?ref=related-7

Ring 6:
Similar to Ring 1, except different wood type and metal finish. Maybe combine this metal finish with Ring 1?

https://www.etsy.com/listing/499896443/whiskey-barrel-ring-titanium-ring?ref=related-8

Ring 7:
Another hammered ring with more distinctive hammer patterns.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/468525...ing-silver-stacking?ref=unav_listing-other-44

Ring 8:
Similar to above but with a more shiny finish. Retailer/vendor appears to be out of business. Could probably replicate with DK or similar.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/740490363705183230/

 

[sledge]

Ring 9:
Yet another spin on the hammer style, except in darker finish. Also, like the engraving option. Think this is the same seller who is out of business.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/50876670769619252/

Ring 10:
Like this ring, but don't like the rose gold/brass color. Would probably change this up to use a more white metal instead. Probably something like the color in Ring 9.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/430234570644171552/

Ring 11:
Really like this one as well. Slightly different style. But like the contrast of the two colors. Think this has a nice modern look without being too flashy.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/574279389965341511/

Rings 12/13/14:
These are kind of kind of similar. More shiny than the others but looks nice.

https://www.briangavindiamonds.com/...ands/flat-wedding-band-18k-white-gold-5424w18
https://www.e-weddingbands.com/store/titanfl5info.html
https://www.e-weddingbands.com/store/product168929.html

 

[Austina]

In order of preference, I like 3, 4, then 1.

3 is very smart & masculine looking without being too flashy IMVHO.

I’m not overly struck on the very hammered look, it could date. Back in 1978 when I got married, bark finish was all the rage, it looks horribly dated now (I actually only wore it for 3 days as it rubbed my finger raw too).

 

[MollyMalone]

A white gold ring doesn't have to be rhodium-plated: SeekingClarity's is unplated WG. WG alloys aren't all alike, but of you like the look of Seeking Clarity's, he might be able to tell you the mix of his or ask his jeweler in Australia for the details on that. Also Stuller makes an "extra white" gold alloy, X1 White Gold®, in 14K and 18K; it's an option for most of their own rings and bands & casting alloys are also available for bench jewelers.

fwiw, one of my office colleagues had a wedding band similar to those offered by GrandJunctionGuy that have caught your eye. The water resistant finish on the wood didn't hold up very well, didn't wear evenly -- which bugged him. But... he only removed the band when, e.g., cleaning his pool and showering-shampooing; didn't want to be bothered taking it off when washing his hands or doing dishes.

Have you tried on any comfort-fit bands that are the width you're leaning towards? You might decide that you really like how they feel in comparison to other bands & since the wedding band is something I'm guessing you'll wear 24/7 (or close to it) for years to come, that would be a design feature to look for.

 

[Matthews1127]

I love all of your selections. Very masculine & clean!

Two things:

1. Make sure whatever metal you choose can be sized; some metals are so durable, they cannot/are nearly impossible to be cut.

2. Make sure this ring fits your personality & every day style. My DH has a hammered textured WR. It’s a subtle hammered pattern, but it fits his personality; he’s in Union Highway Construction. He has thick, Hobbit fingers, so he chose a 4mm width for comfort.

I love @SeekingClarity’s ring, but I’m biased; his diamond is a step cut!!
Not everyone’s lifestyle allows for bling. If you can fit that into your day to day routine, and your budget, I think you should!

So excited to see what you choose!!

 

[ohsomethingshiny]

Great choices! I like several, although not a fan of the hammered look personally.

What you listed made me think of this one: https://www.etsy.com/listing/475451...684ff500482ec45ba49c3730c7b0ed0ac07:475451851

 

[the_mother_thing]

I love all the options you posted, and it’s such a personal preference. If you use your hands a lot, I would suggest something either durable (scratch resistant) or textured as you have posted to help mask any minor dings.

Have you gone out to jewelry stores to try on different metals to gauge the weight differences as well as widths and things like comfort-fit vs no comfort fit, etc., to see what you like in person on your finger? My hubs originally wanted titanium, but when he tried it on it felt nearly weightless (not what he wanted), so he opted for tungsten instead as he liked the durability and weight much better.

Forgive me if this was mentioned already, but you can get a white gold-palladium alloy that wouldn’t require plating, and could be resized if needed down the road. DK offers this I believe.

 

[icy_jade]

Not sure if you have considered Mokume Gane rings. Interesting look if executed well.

 

[Akalahab]

Have you looked on Amazon? https://www.amazon.com/Beveled-Edge...534769278&sr=1-34&pi=SL140_CR0,0,140,180_QL70

There are really inexpensive Tungsten rings on Amazon. You can get multiple sizes if concerned about finger size fluctuations. And if lost, easily replaceable. They don't scratch, are weighty, and don't change colors.

 

[Luce]

I like #3 the best. I think the hammered finishes look dated and also would be concerned about the wood/metal design holding up. In the end, go with your heart! I’m excited to see what you end up with!

 

[Double E]

I like your belief that you are bringing strength to the marriage. How do you think about Damascus steel?

 

[Wewechew]

I vote #4 (yes, I'm boring).

 

[Double E]

And for the ring 2 style, it's also a good idea, since you can get a BGD emerald cut also!

 

[natasha-cupcake]

I personally would steer away from alternative metals. Some can present significant safety issues with removal, if you were to have a finger injury that necessitated a quick removal of the ring. I also feel that precious metals have been used in wedding jewelry for a reason. I'm a traditionalist, I guess.

I never cared for the hammered look, so those would be out for me. I love the wood and metal ones (1 and 6), for their unique materials, overall look (emanates strength and beauty), but I'm unsure how the wood element would hold up over time. I also love the simplicity of 12, 13 and 14.

But, if I were you, I think I would probably, in the end, pick something very similar to ring #2. I love the way it looks and I love the diamond, which, to me, is a subtle tie-in to your fiancee's ring. This is my interpretation--your fiancee has lots and lots of diamonds in her ring, which represents the light she brings to your life and having a single diamond in your ring signifies that you are the one and only man for her.

 

[Wewechew]

I also want to add- If I were you, I would have DK make your ring and make it in the same metal as your future fiancé's (14k unplated white gold). There is something romantic in them being made by the same person and in the same metal.

 

[TreeScientist]

I also want to add- If I were you, I would have DK make your ring and make it in the same metal as your future fiancé's (14k unplated white gold). There is something romantic in them being made by the same person and in the same metal.

That's what I'll be doing, so this would be my vote too.

Plus, as @natasha-cupcake said, I prefer the precious metals from a safety and resizeability (is that a word? ) standpoint. I want my ring to be a "forever ring" and I know that ring sizes change throughout the years, so I want something that can be resized. In my case, this will be platinum.

 

[twang07]

I love black bands on men. I bought my husband the Klass zirconium band and he loves it. It's super light (which he likes the most about it) and sleek. He is a size 7 and got a 6mm band. He played with widths using tungsten bands (and he lost all of them), if that's something you want to try.

 

[BlingDreams]

I'd do #2 or #3, but if #3 then with the center line being flush otherwise gunk will pile up in there (lotion, soap, etc.) and catch/scratch things.

But I can't imagine you without a diamond. I think a precision cut diamond by Yoram, either a baguette or elongated french cut, would be perfect for that #2 ring. And that way you'll also know your diamond is the best of the best.

 

[LJsapphire]

My fiancé was watching a youtube video of this guy making rings and he has been interested in these :

https://patrickadairdesigns.com/

Just to add some different ones (meteorite, glowstone, wooden- he does Mokume Gane too )

 

[TreeScientist]

If I was going to go for an alternative metal, I would probably get one of these:
https://mcwhinneydesigns.com/

The scientist/engineer in me is fascinated by these, plus I have the knuckles-larger-than-finger problem. Only problem is that they're not sizable. Hmm, choices choices.

I like the TG-1. Crazy expensive though
https://mcwhinneydesigns.com/products/tg-1

 

[MollyMalone]

I don't know how "market-sensitive" DK's already very reasonable pricing is, but platinum's price has dropped in recent weeks to $775/oz (give or take some dollars) -- down from $1,008 in the last week of January. Gold too has dropped, from $1352/oz earlier this year to $1185 on Friday.

But don't expect the current $400+ spread between gold and platinum to mean you'll pay less for a platinum ring. Platinum is denser than gold; the platinum alloys have a higher percentage (90-95%) of platinum than the percentage of gold in 14K and 18K alloys; a platinum piece is generally more "demanding" for a bench; and what a bench has in stock wasn't purchased on the commodities market last week. Still, now is a better time to choose either a platinum or gold ring than, say, back in August-September 2011 when both platinum and gold hit over $1900/oz!

 

[msop04]

I just wanted to point out that a 6 mm band may be too small. My husband is 6' with an athletic build and wears a size 10.5 - he chose an 8 mm band. He liked the 7 mm as well, but thought the 6 was "girly." LOL If you've tried on 6 mm and love the size, then disregard... but I think you need to go and try on tons of bands in lots of styles and sizes to see what you like best.

 

[Happytobemrsg]

Not sure if you have considered Mokume Gane rings. Interesting look if executed well.

I was going to suggest this! I want to get DH one for a RHR

 

[MamaBee]

I vote for #4..I think it’s clean, simple, and classic..They also look like they have it in a wider band if you think it’s too skinny.

 

[mrsgreeneyes]

#9 is by far my favorite, but as it is your wedding band my opinion means zilch, haha. One of my favorite men's bands is the Anthony by Single Stone - I love the hammered look and the fact that it is slightly domed instead of flat.


https://www.singlestone.com/mens-bands_c21/anthony_p380/

 

[msop04]

@sledge, if you're considering going platinum, I wouldn't get a high polish style if you expect to keep it that way. It will scratch sooooo easily. BIL has a plain 7mm platinum band, and it wasn't a week in that he noticed lots of tiny scratches. He's never had it repolished, as he likes the patina. Brushed, hammered, and carved styles would really work well with platinum for that reason.

 

[sledge]

On the metal choices, I may not be opposed to DK's "special" WG/palladium mix. This is what was chosen for my girl's ring because she wanted shiny and I didn't want the headache of re-plating. I nearly gave her platinum, but she doesn't care for the patina like I do. I know my chemicals break down standard WG plated rings so fast it's a waste of time & effort, and given the lower price points I just assumed any WG mixes I got (from anyone besides DK) likely would not work.

Also, I agree there is some feel good vibes about having DK design a ring for me too.

After more consideration, as much as I do like the metal & wood combo ring, I do not think I could commit to being so delicate with my ring. Also, awhile back I tried on a comfort fit metal band and it was super nice. The wood may begin to age and get imperfect which may make it where I don't like wearing the band.

If I were to go with something similar to #2, I'd either want to go with a brushed WG/palladium mix and couple with a grey diamond/spinel. Or possibly take the darker metal/finish like ring 4 and couple with a colorless (D-F) stone. Below is a Photochop using SeekingClarity's stone and the ring 4.



There was another thread about black diamonds where @rockysalamander pointed out some suggestions for black/grey diamonds. While these aren't the right shapes & sizes, it intrigued my interest. Could see the inverse of colors as above if I were to go this way.

https://www.jamesallen.com/loose-di...ear-shaped/0.27-carat-si1-clarity-sku-4864669
https://www.jamesallen.com/loose-di...cushion-cut/0.35-carat-i2-clarity-sku-4864567
https://mdmayagems.com/collections/...uish-gray-spinel-unheated-cushion-cut-1-22-ct

I do know if I'm being realistic I don't think a shiny ring will last long with me. So I think brushed or that worn look is probably what I need. Also, I still think the 4mm band is probably too narrow. It will go try some rings on at a local store to gauge look & feel but I'm not a dainty little guy. I have zero concerns about a ring being too heavy, but do worry about them being too light and girly looking -- no offense ladies.

 

[tlfiore]

@sledge FWIW, my two cents. There are so many varying opinions, I hope we are not confusing you more. IN the end, it's a matter or your personal taste, your lifestyle and your sentimentality. With that, a few things to consider:

1) I think all the hammered stuff is sooooo 70s and 80s...all of it seems dated to me. Screams 70s. Take it from someone who "lived" through the hammered metal hippie trend.
2) I'm not a fan of wood in a ring...but I'm a germaphobe (being a nurse and all)...no no no! It's yet another bizarre trend to mass market stuff and it too shall pass.
3) As others have said, it boils down to "are you a traditionalist or a trend setter."

To me, all this new stuff is okay and sorta (not really) cool...but it is trendy. So I won't repeat the options for traditional vs other bands.

But FWIW, my FIRST pick is hands-down DK's #3.
LOVE the design, even if it is a bit more contemporary & "trendy." It's somewhat traditional with a twist.

SECOND pick would be #11. It's similar to the DK ring but with less indentation (does that make sense). I love the design on the DK ring but as others have pointed out, the ring may hold gunk.

Also, as others have stated, a lot depends on your life-style. I am not a fan of "constantly removing rings" for x, y & z reasons because that equals LOST or MISPLACED RING to me.

And while styles and trends come and go, my experience has been (at least with the few men I know) that most men remain with their original wedding band!

So, choose something you think you can live with for a while.

And as I've mentioned before (as an old 60-yr old lady with lots of life experience and many many bumps, lots of mistakes) when REAL LIFE starts happening for you and your girl, rings aren't gonna matter as much!

You are a lot of fun, @sledge

And PLEASE do not take offense to this, but... I guess I'm just recognizing "my girl" is new Urban Slang for "my lady" or "my old lady," or "my lady friend," all of which I'm not a fan...

Showing my age...don't like "significant other," "friends with benefits," or "wifey" either, YUCKKKK! HELP!!!
Fiancee, or soon to be fiancee sounds nice.

 

[TreeScientist]

[B]"wifey"[/B] either, YUCKKKK! HELP!!!

God, I'm glad I'm not the only one. I've never actually heard a man use the word wifey (luckily, because I probably wouldn't talk to that man ever again haha) but there was a period about 5 years ago where EVERY WOMAN was using the word "hubby." I swear, that word was like nails on a chalkboard to me. Every time I heard a woman start a sentence with "My hubby..." I'm pretty sure I had a visceral reaction similar to the woman's reaction to "moist" in this video:
[MEDIA=youtube]1nRMmrY_Qh4[/MEDIA]

I guess I'm old fashioned too. I like fiancé (if not yet married), husband, or wife.

 

[tlfiore]

God, I'm glad I'm not the only one. I've never actually heard a man use the word wifey (luckily, because I probably wouldn't talk to that man ever again haha) but there was a period about 5 years ago where EVERY WOMAN was using the word "hubby." I swear, that word was like nails on a chalkboard to me. Every time I heard a woman start a sentence with "My hubby..." I'm pretty sure I had a visceral reaction similar to the woman's reaction to "moist" in this video:
[MEDIA=youtube]1nRMmrY_Qh4[/MEDIA]

I guess I'm old fashioned too. I like fiancé (if not yet married), husband, or wife.

Just watched your clip! That is so so funny! Hubby...oooh...yeah, uh NO! And, we have names, right?
Just sayin...thanks for having a bit of fun @TreeScientist !