Gift ideas for new neighbor; possible cultural concerns

[marymm]

I would think that removing the fence should be your job, as it's on your land. Making her remove it feels a bit like adding insult to injury.

As another POV:

The neighbor bought her property 2 years prior; the previous owner of her property had installed the fence. The neighbor did not do her due diligence in researching & purchasing the property. Had the neighbor (and/or the prior owner & participating agents in the purchase/sale) done the proper work in checking property records, which I would have thought is an essential non-skippable part of property buying/selling, the issue would have been discovered and rectified by the party who erected the fence.

Making the PSer, who purchased the property which has been found to be illegally encroached upon by neighbor, to have to pay to get what is legally hers seems absurd and wrong. To me, the PSer is the wronged/innocent party, and the neighbor is the one who has done/perpetuated the wrong ... someone who fails to do their due diligence in my view is not an innocent party.

 

[TooPatient]

TMT -- it says a lot about you that you realize how hard this will be on her. You are a good person.

What a miserable situation to be in. I think you are handling it as well as anyone possibly could.

I wouldn't do upscale gift card as you don't know her situation. I worked for a guy who have me a $100 Nordstrom gift card one year. Great. That covered a scarf. It was miserable trying to find stuff that would not be over the gift card amount as I had nothing extra to spend at that time.

I don't think a gift is necessarily the right direction. A nice card and cut flowers or simple potted flower (I love the orchid idea) might be better.

If you want to do bigger, maybe look at some options for having the new cherry trees moved for her. Or see if there is a way to cut a smidge off your lot to help make hers less awkward. (I know, long shot and HOA and all but tossing out as I don't know enough about this sort of thing to know if it would even be possible.)

 

[daneshpastry]

Do you know her last name? That would help with determining her background.

 

[GliderPoss]

I think go around & actually chat to her in person Ie. Not via agents. Take a cake and a handwritten card as apology for the stress. It’s not her fault but nor is it yours! You’ve already offered to pay the cost so there isn’t much more you can do but just be a good kind neighbour from now on. Best of luck.

 

[the_mother_thing]

Thank you to everyone who chimed in with advice & suggestions. I will mull this over in the next couple days and decide which route feels best in terms of an offering to the neighbor. As I said in the beginning, my ultimate goal is to just have & be a nice neighbor, and thank her for her cooperation.

@mrs-b & @doberman Again, the problem is, it is not our property YET. And the catch 22 is - we won’t own the property if the fence is not moved before next Friday, as we cannot close with it there (explained this already up-thread). So we cannot do anything including physically removing the fence ourselves aside from offer to contribute toward the costs, which we did. If we removed the fence ourselves, or we contracted someone to remove the fence BEFORE closing, we could be sued because we do not own the property the fence is on. But the sellers and/or their agent can, and they’ve sorted it out somehow/way with the neighbor. I’m not privy to the arrangement/agreement details.

The “who/what/where/when” of the fence isn’t really the issue I’m seeking feedback on here (though I do appreciate the various perspectives), but that’s what we have an attorney for. My primary concern and reason for posting this thread is seeking suggestions for a kind, meaningful gesture/gift for the neighbor who has agreed to remove her fence, which WILL allow us to own the property on/after next Friday. And since I’m not as familiar with Asian cultures, I wanted to make sure that any gesture we extend is not ill-received or considered offensive in some way - or if even the very act of offering the gift under the circumstances might be ill received.

@daneshpastry The last name is Wang. Thanks!

 

[the_mother_thing]

The neighbor bought her property 2 years prior; the previous owner of her property had installed the fence. The neighbor did not do her due diligence in researching & purchasing the property. Had the neighbor (and/or the prior owner & participating agents in the purchase/sale) done the proper work in checking property records, which I would have thought is an essential non-skippable part of property buying/selling, the issue would have been discovered and rectified by the party who erected the fence.

THIS RIGHT HERE! I discovered the issue just by looking at Google Maps, and that didn’t cost a penny! And it didn’t cost me anything to pull the plat on the county’s GIS website. The survey cost was far less expensive than relocating a fence. But I still don’t fault the neighbor woman really, as I suspect her agent did not advise her very well and/or the language barrier might have led to her not fully understanding either the need for the survey (if it was suggested by her agent) or the results of a survey (if she did in fact get one).

 

[daneshpastry]

Thank you to everyone who chimed in with advice & suggestions. I will mull this over in the next couple days and decide which route feels best in terms of an offering to the neighbor. As I said in the beginning, my ultimate goal is to just have & be a nice neighbor, and thank her for her cooperation.

@mrs-b & @doberman Again, the problem is, it is not our property YET. And the catch 22 is - we won’t own the property if the fence is not moved before next Friday, as we cannot close with it there (explained this already up-thread). So we cannot do anything including physically removing the fence ourselves aside from offer to contribute toward the costs, which we did. If we removed the fence ourselves, or we contracted someone to remove the fence BEFORE closing, we could be sued because we do not own the property the fence is on. But the sellers and/or their agent can, and they’ve sorted it out somehow/way with the neighbor. I’m not privy to the arrangement/agreement details.

The “who/what/where/when” of the fence isn’t really the issue I’m seeking feedback on here (though I do appreciate the various perspectives), but that’s what we have an attorney for. My primary concern and reason for posting this thread is seeking suggestions for a kind, meaningful gesture/gift for the neighbor who has agreed to remove her fence, which WILL allow us to own the property on/after next Friday. And since I’m not as familiar with Asian cultures, I wanted to make sure that any gesture we extend is not ill-received or considered offensive in some way - or if even the very act of offering the gift under the circumstances might be ill received.

@daneshpastry The last name is Wang. Thanks!

She is Chinese .

 

[doberman]

Really a crazy thing. I wonder why the former owners of the house didn't say something when the fence first went up. I hope you find a way to resolve this amicably.

 

[Lisa Loves Shiny]

My suggestion is to meet the potential neighbor before you close on the house. I would rather lose earnest money than live next to a hostile neighbor. Your potential neighbor may be lovely, but I would test the waters before I dove in.

 

[Bron357]

If you want to buy her a plant, buy her a jade plant. They are very auspicious to Asians as they represent good luck, prosperity and friendship.

 

[the_mother_thing]

Really a crazy thing. I wonder why the former owners of the house didn't say something when the fence first went up. I hope you find a way to resolve this amicably.

The owners (of ‘our’ home) bought the home, lived in it for a couple years, then relocated out of state, after which they leased the home. That is when the neighbor’s fence was installed by that home’s previous owners. Per our sellers’ agent, ‘our’ home’s owners have not since seen their house or the fence, so they had/have no idea. And I believe that because if you saw it, you’d agree: no reasonable person who owned this home would have allowed/given permission to any neighbor to have a fence installed that literally cuts half-way across/into the back yard directly behind the home the way this one does. I think the sellers’ agent saw the fence in place and just assumed the lot was - in fact - irregular shaped (per the feedback from potential buyers over the last 6 months). But that doesn’t excuse the owners’ neglect in the situation - they/their agent should have known what was going on with their home. And if the neighbor’s agent had properly advised her to get a survey when she bought her home, she’d have realized then that she was not in fact buying what she thought she was. It sucks for her, but that is not our fault nor anything we can/could have controlled. If we were able to buy the home with the neighbor’s fence in place (e.g., not have the title issue hold us up from closing as it now is), our plan was to approach the neighbor with the situation, and offer (pay) to have our fence company relocate her fence as part of our fence install plans. But we don’t have that option; we can only be a good neighbor once we do own the home & move in.

I know - there are multiple levels of ‘crazy’ about this situation that far exceed the realm of believability ... that there were so many opportunities for someone to ‘catch’ and ‘correct’ this along the way, yet no one did. And we knew going into this when we researched everything that it would likely be a crapshow to deal with. If it weren’t THE perfect home (size, layout, location, amenities, etc.) for our family, we’d have passed on it like everyone else did for six months. If it wasn’t us buying it and bringing this whole issue to light, it would be someone else down the road doing it.

As for ‘solving it amicably’, that is our goal; however, WE cannot ‘solve it’; rather, the sellers (legally) must resolve it before we go to settlement. And that is being done. All we can do is what we’ve done - offer to help cover the cost of removing the neighbor’s encroaching fence section, and - once we do go to settlement - be a kind neighbor to her. And THAT is what I’m trying to do with seeking suggestions for the ‘peace offering’ so to speak, though we know that nothing we do can make up to her the actual & financial ‘loss’ of what she thought was half her back yard.

 

[the_mother_thing]

My suggestion is to meet the potential neighbor before you close on the house. I would rather lose earnest money than live next to a hostile neighbor. Your potential neighbor may be lovely, but I would test the waters before I dove in.

We tried but she hasn’t been there when we stopped by the last few times. Our agent has met/talked with her though, and said she was really a lovely, kind woman, and we trust her instincts. It’s beyond worrying about losing our earnest money at this point - we have all of the ‘balls’ in motion to move in less than 2 weeks, and some of those ‘balls’ are not flexible at this point beyond a possible delay in closing of a few days.

If you want to buy her a plant, buy her a jade plant. They are very auspicious to Asians as they represent good luck, prosperity and friendship.

THANK YOU! I greatly appreciate that suggestion, and that is exactly what I was looking for - something that would convey a kind, meaningful sentiment to her above and beyond a card saying ‘thanks’. Heck, if I knew her wrist size, I’d consider even finding/buying her a jade bracelet (this IS a jewelry forum, after all). But I like your idea a LOT; thank you!

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that this situation will be resolved amicably and SOON. Moving is sooo draining..
You're absolutely doing the right thing and it seems like you're doing whatever you can to solve the situation. LOVE @Bron357 's suggestion for the plant.
I hope you or your agent have the opportunity to explain and make her understand that it's not YOU who's doing anything in this case, but that the situation is being resolved by the old owners in order to be able to sell their house.

I think if you can really make this point, it's much more likely you will have a good neighbourly relationship in the future.

 

[the_mother_thing]

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that this situation will be resolved amicably and SOON. Moving is sooo draining..
You're absolutely doing the right thing and it seems like you're doing whatever you can to solve the situation. LOVE @Bron357 's suggestion for the plant.
I hope you or your agent have the opportunity to explain and make her understand that it's not YOU who's doing anything in this case, but that the situation is being resolved by the old owners in order to be able to sell their house.

I think if you can really make this point, it's much more likely you will have a good neighbourly relationship in the future.

Thank you! That is precisely what our agent shared with the neighbor when she spoke with her, and why she did - so we wouldn’t be ‘blamed’ for the issue per se and to try & foster the start for a good neighborly rapport. We’ve been to the home 4-5 times now, but haven’t managed to catch her at home to introduce ourselves and speak with her. Our agent got lucky when meeting an inspector there on our behalf. It’s about 30 mins from our current homes, so getting there regularly is a challenge since we have two houses being prepped to move, plus mine is under renovation. It’s chaotic to say the least!

 

[missy]

I've not read through all the previous responses (I'm 'working' ) but I would be tempted to not reference the fence issue at all, and just go with the nice 'hello, we're your new neighbours' gesture.

It's a difficult situation because one wants to acknowledge when another party has had to inconvenience themselves for another's benefit, but none of this is your fault - her estate agent should have picked up the fence issue; she should have more diligently researched the particulars of the property she was buying; your property's old owners should have also more diligently researched their property particulars; the sellers' estate agent should have picked up the fence issue; and you just happen to be the person that is moving in after the pre-existing issue has been resolved.

Whether it was for your ultimate benefit or someone else's, the fence issue would have had to be resolved at some point, so you shouldn't feel bad or like you owe her anything.

Bake a cake, be friendly, be good neighbours - move forward and don't dwell on past issues. She might (and might grumble about it), and if she does that would be a shame, but none of that is within your control.

I agree completely with @OoohShiny. Not everyone will receive your good intentions in the same way. And yes some of us have great neighbors and some of us don't. Sadly life is not a fairy tale where we are all best friends with our neighbors. Oh but I wish it was. But people vary. Some might appreciate your efforts and some might look at it as weakness. I would be cautious and not start off in a too friendly manner. My philosophy with neighbors is friendly but with clear boundaries (literally and figuratively) and cordial and polite but be wary of anything more intense at least to start. I think you are going to know exactly the right thing to do because it sounds like you already are on that path.

Good luck with the move and congratulations on your lovely new home with your family.

 

[the_mother_thing]

Thank you @missy

 

[the_mother_thing]

I wavered back & forth on whether I should share this or not, but the picture really tells the unfortunate story here re: the fence for those who are/were curious, and if nothing else, reinforces the point - if you buy a home, get a property survey!


"Our’s" is the home/property with the gray heart. You can see the faint dark line (which is the fence) behind the neighbor’s home that crosses the light gray property/boundary line, and that property line is dead-on to the survey we obtained for ‘our’ house. You can see: 1) why people who toured ‘our’ home in person thought (because of the neighbor’s fence) the lot was so irregular shaped; 2) what the neighbor thought was her property vs what actually is her property; and 3) why I genuinely feel bad for her ... because in addition to the crappy property line between our homes, there is also an 8’ setback for any fences from the side property lines, and a 25’ set-back from the back property lines. Really, there shouldn’t be any fence in her back yard at all but I’m not raising that issue with/to anyone.

Hubby & I talked more about this situation. Carving out a slice of our property to ‘give’/sell the neighbor is not something we want to do, nor would it be easy to do given how the lots are carved out; however, we are mulling over a possible proposal for the neighbor and the HOA to see if they will consider making an exception to the 8’ set-back and allow us a shared fence on the property line in this case, given the massive FUBAR (in part by the HOA) and to allow her to at least have fenced-in use of what is left of her back yard, but we aren’t holding our breath on it being approved, and we want/need assurances that we wouldn’t be forced to move our fence down the road if she sells and her buyer raises a hissy fit. We’re just worried that in doing this, it might bring attention to her fence being within the 25’ set-back, and create more problems for her. So we’re just not sure ...

Honestly, if I were her and was just handed this crapstorm, I would remove the fence entirely and get that house on the market for sale STAT ... before our fence gets put in and she is potentially faced with the same predicament ‘our’ home’s sellers have had for the last 6+ months of people hating the lot layout. And I don’t mean to suggest I want her to move at all ... it’s just what I would do to hopefully minimize the property value loss ... because set-backs aside, that really is a crummy-shaped lot if you enjoy having any back yard at all.

 

[House Cat]

In my state fences do not create an eminent domain situation. Fences do not mark property lines either. The property lines have already been determined and A surveyor can come out to clarify the property lines if needed.

Maybe you should arm her with the advice that she should sue the real estate agent who sold her the house or the previous owner. This seems like it should be something that was put in the disclosures otherwise this is fraud. Start by asking your agent if she has any recourse.

A heartfelt talk is a good start but if I am being totally honest, you made the decision to buy this home knowing you would have to take a cutthroat position of slashing this person’s yard in the end. There was only the tiniest chance that you were going to have a good relationship with this neighbor after this incident. Rationally, it isn’t either of your faults, but she is having something very big taken from her and I could see how that would be difficult to get over. This isn’t to say that you two should be throwing firebombs at one another, but I wouldn’t count on being pals.

 

[TooPatient]

I love the Jade plant suggestion!

That is a substantial difference in lines! The developer who laid the plots out to begin with made a mess. I'm sorry you and she are having to deal with this at all. So many things went wrong along the lines before either of you got involved.

 

[the_mother_thing]

In my state fences do not create an eminent domain situation. Fences do not mark property lines either. The property lines have already been determined and A surveyor can come out to clarify the property lines if needed.

Maybe you should arm her with the advice that she should sue the real estate agent who sold her the house or the previous owner. This seems like it should be something that was put in the disclosures otherwise this is fraud. Start by asking your agent if she has any recourse.

A heartfelt talk is a good start but if I am being totally honest, you made the decision to buy this home knowing you would have to take a cutthroat position of slashing this person’s yard in the end. There was only the tiniest chance that you were going to have a good relationship with this neighbor after this incident. Rationally, it isn’t either of your faults, but she is having something very big taken from her and I could see how that would be difficult to get over. This isn’t to say that you two should be throwing firebombs at one another, but I wouldn’t count on being pals.

Our agent tried to reach out to her (neighbor’s) agent from when she bought the house to determine what if anything was disclosed, was there an easement agreement, was a survey obtained or was it suggested and declined by the current owner, etc. She could not locate the specific agent (likely moved on), but our agent did suggest to the neighbor that she contact the broker of the agency through which she was represented to see if she had any recourse; they’d likely assist her with reviewing her paperwork and any possible remedies if for no other reason than to possibly keep themselves out of court for failing her as a buyer’s agent. We don’t know if - by her home’s sellers presenting the home as having land that was not theirs - that equates to not delivering ‘clear title’ to her (which could possibly be ‘breach of contract’); she has to follow up on that herself or have her attorney do so. But that’s about all our agent can do as she didn’t/doesn’t represent the neighbor, and our agent has certain ‘ethical’ boundaries she must observe.

Yes, we knew this was going to be a difficult situation when the official survey would come back; no, we did not/do not expect to become ‘besties’ with the neighbor and have regular afternoon tea; just be respectful neighbors toward eachother. And yes, we realized that - by buying this home and “reclaiming” the encroached section of property in the process - it was not going to be a favorable outcome for the neighbor. It sucks, and we did not enter into this contract-to-buy without careful consideration all around. But as I mentioned earlier/up-thread, it is the perfect home for us, and many people not including us created this inevitable situation - it was only a matter of when. Whatever did transpire when that house was sold does not mean this (‘our’) home shouldn’t be sold with clear title to the land it was recorded with. And yes, there is a financial benefit to us of buying this home because it’s price was lowered significantly compared to the comps as a result of having sat unsold for 6 months. But that is NOT the sole reason for us buying it, obviously, nor is it a dominating reason.

All we can do - once we settle on the home - is talk with the neighbor, apologize for the people and processes that apparently failed her, and be a good neighbor when/where/how we can.

 

[OoohShiny]

Sorry to ask potentially stupid questions, but what are these 'set backs' from boundary lines that are mentioned?

Is it the case that the boundary line is X and any fence that is constructed for/on the property must be, for example, 8' away from that boundary line (and within the property curtilage)? So 8' of the property's land is outside of the fence?

That seems slightly bizarre... Would that not mean a 16' wide corridor of land between two properties that looked like a 'no man's land'??


And the neighbour wouldn't be able to construct a fence between her property and your property because 8' back from her side boundary lines is actually inside her house, going from the overhead view??

And 25' back from her rear boundary line is also inside her house??


(Have you measured the distance that 'her' fence is away from your property's rear boundary? Is it 25'? I'm wondering if it's been fenced to 25' from your rear boundary and she's assumed the space is hers because she's not aware of the setback rule and has no boundary fences for her property to delineate the space...)

Is there a property to the bottom left of the overhead view, in the land that has a square corner? Or does your property back onto open woodland or similar?

 

[the_mother_thing]

@OoohShiny Your assumption about what set-backs are is correct: any structure/fence that is built on the property must be 8’ from the property line on the sides, and 25’ from the property line in the back (and - I believe - the front). So yes, there could be a 16’ wide corridor between fences, which I presume is to help minimize potential issues re: shared fence lines (such as someone outlined earlier in this thread with having to move their fence) as well as possible ‘enjoyment’ of each person’s property. And yes, that appears to mean the back of her house is right about *at* that 25’ rear boundary point.

I agree - looking at the boundary lines for the neighbor’s home, it does not seem (per the covenants) that a fence would even be permitted in that back yard. Her property has neighbors on each side of her - left, right, behind - except the front/street. It looks like the developer/builder situated her home in such a way that it was *right* on the 8’/25’ setbacks on both sides and the back (probably to maximize development of the land). And from the developer/builder’s perspective, I can kind of see them doing that because not everyone wants/needs a big back yard, a fence, etc. There is a property for every person out there, and while probably not ideal for you or I, it might be perfect for someone else who maybe prefers to have more ‘front’ yard (house setting back a bit) than back yard. If we didn’t have kids, pets, etc., the seclusion & privacy afforded by the trees might be desireable. And, in that case and especially considering the angle of our shared property line, the 8’ setback imposed by the HOA makes even more sense because otherwise, we could be in our back yard but essentially ‘all up in her business’ back there (e.g., reference that ‘enjoyment’ of one’s property I mentioned above).

Neither us nor our realtor has measured anything on/with her property; only the surveyor who measured ‘our’ property, and noted that the corner point of her fence that encroaches into ‘our’ back yard does so by just over 22’, which does not take into account the additional 8’ set-back on her side of the property line. And by that fence being there - for title purposes - it presents a potential conflict over that portion of property in terms of ownership rights, and that is why it must be removed before we close, or ‘clear’ title (ownership) cannot convey. Our lender will not fund the loan without a clear title because it poses a potential risk to them IF we were to ever default on the loan and they had to foreclose and resell the property. And it’s not just *our* lender, but pretty much any lender. And that is why I stated earlier - this situation really is inevitable for whomever bought ‘our’ home *unless* they were cash buyers (no loan), and didn’t give a flip about the back yard situation.

 

[OoohShiny]

Thanks for the detailed reply

I just found it strange as we don't seem to have anything like that over here in the UK - but then all our plot sizes are generally tiny. The 'new' garden on the next door house would be pretty standard in size for any new build house on a housing estate nowadays, and no-one has the sort of space that some US states enforce as a minimum plot size which would allow one to lose 25' foot from the back and still have an enormous plot!

 

[the_mother_thing]

Thanks for the detailed reply

I just found it strange as we don't seem to have anything like that over here in the UK - but then all our plot sizes are generally tiny. The 'new' garden on the next door house would be pretty standard in size for any new build house on a housing estate nowadays, and no-one has the sort of space that some US states enforce as a minimum plot size which would allow one to lose 25' foot from the back and still have an enormous plot!

We looked at some homes that had even less back yard than this neighbor’s (actual) lot. It’s crazy to us how some developers are just cramming houses into every square inch of every chunk of land they can buy up in our area with what equates to a postage stamp for a yard. And I’m even more surprised that so many people are buying them up for the prices they are being offered. I don’t mind having some proximity to my neighbors, but I don’t want to be so close they can hand me the shampoo bottle from their shower while I’m in mine.

A clarification to what I posted earlier is that these set-backs from the property line are only for the neighborhood that we are buying in because they have an association that pre-defined them in the covenants when the neighborhood was first developed. This isn’t the case (these specific 8’/25’ set-backs) for every piece of property in the U.S., or even in the town we’re buying. Houses that aren’t in an association may not have any set-backs or easements aside from what the county zoning laws prescribe, which - for example - at my current home is only 3’ from the shared property lines. It really just depends on what you’re buying, where, if there is an HOA/covenants, and if you’re in the city limits or out in the county.

 

[lyra]

Does this all mean that YOU can't fence in your property? I can't live without a fence because of our dogs. We have different rules here. Fences are on property lines and each neighbour has to share the cost of construction.

 

[CJ2008]

@the_mother_thing I just want to say again I think you and your DH are really going out of your way to be thoughtful and fair and thorough.

And it is perfectly OK for you to do what you need to do to have the lot you're entitled to.

Too bad your neighbor either didn't do what she was supposed to do when she bought the house and she didn't have anyone properly guiding her and helping her. I skimmed some of the posts and I think someone mentioned that she should sue whoever was representing her - if realtors or attorneys or whoever she was working with are supposed to ask for surveys I hope she does hold someone accountable.

 

[the_mother_thing]

Does this all mean that YOU can't fence in your property? I can't live without a fence because of our dogs. We have different rules here. Fences are on property lines and each neighbour has to share the cost of construction.

No, we can fence in our yard with HOA approval of our plans so long as our fence is within the defined set-backs. And that is our plan because my dogs are used to having the use of a doggy door and run of the fenced back yard at our current home. That was also a requirement for us in our home search - enough back yard to fence in for them, and a lot of the homes we looked at had very little/if any back yard.

@the_mother_thing I just want to say again I think you and your DH are really going out of your way to be thoughtful and fair and thorough.

And it is perfectly OK for you to do what you need to do to have the lot you're entitled to.

Too bad your neighbor either didn't do what she was supposed to do when she bought the house and she didn't have anyone properly guiding her and helping her. I skimmed some of the posts and I think someone mentioned that she should sue whoever was representing her - if realtors or attorneys or whoever she was working with are supposed to ask for surveys I hope she does hold someone accountable.

Thank you; we’re trying to be as fair/considerate as possible given the circumstances but we are very limited in what we can do since the actions (removal) must be completed before we officially become the owners.

In the case of surveys (for here at least), the buyer’s realtor can only recommend the buyer to get a survey and why it’s advantageous to do so; they cannot mandate that they get one as it’s an optional expense for the buyer; and agents/attorneys are not mandated (e.g., by law) to get one on behalf of a buyer unless that buyer requests it. And it’s not the sellers’ agent’s responsibility to suggest one to a potential buyer, as they represent the seller/s interests. So if the neighbor’s realtor/attorney suggested it, and she (neighbor/buyer) declined to get one, then there really don’t appear to be any grounds for legal recourse. The only other possible recourse we can see for the neighbor is if she can prove that the sellers of her home knowingly did not disclose the fence encroachment, but even then, that’s why you (as a buyer) get a survey and why realtors suggest it - to avoid situations like this.

It really is an unfortunate situation no matter which way you look at it.

 

[smitcompton]

Hi,

That's funny that your definition of a set back is from the property line. Here in my neck of the woods it from the house structure. I have a eight foot setback from my house to where a fence would be allowed.

I really mean no disrespect, but I think you are making a big deal over the neighbors reaction. She is elderly, hopefully likes living there and will adjust to the new conditions. I don't think its your job to tell her how to proceed unless it comes up in a personal conversation later on. I think the giving of a jade plant because she is Asian is (I'm throwing up my hands here) Is what?? If she wanted jade plants I'm sure she has them.
I wish you luck with your new house. I'm beginning to be sorry for the neighbor.

Annette

 

[Calliecake]

I hope this all goes well for you. After seeing the picture this seems like it has the potential to be a nightmare. I say this as someone who works really hard on our yard and though I realize none of this is your fault, I feel bad for this poor woman. From what you said she has spent a lot of time and energy keeping her yard beautiful. I can’t imagine this not being hard for the woman. I’m hoping Annette is correct in saying it may not be a big deal to her. Please, please don’t buy her a jade plant.

One of my family members moved into a new subdivision and their lot was like your neighbors. It was never a problem because neither of them had or wanted a fence. They both lived in their homes for 30 years.

 

[redwood66]

We looked at some homes that had even less back yard than this neighbor’s (actual) lot. It’s crazy to us how some developers are just cramming houses into every square inch of every chunk of land they can buy up in our area with what equates to a postage stamp for a yard. And I’m even more surprised that so many people are buying them up for the prices they are being offered. I don’t mind having some proximity to my neighbors, but I don’t want to be so close they can hand me the shampoo bottle from their shower while I’m in mine.

A clarification to what I posted earlier is that these set-backs from the property line are only for the neighborhood that we are buying in because they have an association that pre-defined them in the covenants when the neighborhood was first developed. This isn’t the case (these specific 8’/25’ set-backs) for every piece of property in the U.S., or even in the town we’re buying. Houses that aren’t in an association may not have any set-backs or easements aside from what the county zoning laws prescribe, which - for example - at my current home is only 3’ from the shared property lines. It really just depends on what you’re buying, where, if there is an HOA/covenants, and if you’re in the city limits or out in the county.

This is why I would never buy in a neighborhood with an HOA. It seems preposterous to me that an association can deem a large portion of your property unusable (8' setback) for a fence. Buildings yes but not a fence. Cities and counties have setbacks for structures.

In looking at the aerial is is amazing to me that your neighbor's agent and the selling agent of the previous owners did not perform due diligence or possibly was not forthcoming with disclosure in the case of the selling agent/owner. I presume this is still in NC? I don't know what the statutes are but how the heck was title issued on her place when she bought it? This issue should have been found by the title company when she bought as I assume her purchase was the first sale of either property since the fence installation. I wonder if she would have a case against them?

Congrats on finding a new house and I hope this all works out well.