Do you really hate Christmas, Thanksgiving etc?

[arkieb1]

At the risk of sounding like a Grinch I hate Christmas. Growing up in a dysfunctional family and marrying into one the day is generally more of a s@*#show than a happy family event and mostly always has been. I try and put on a smile and go out of the way to make the day happy for my son because I know he won't be small forever. Does anyone else actually not enjoy these holidays?

 

[Karl_K]

I really miss my mom around the holidays even after 19 years.
Her birthday was dec 24th and she was big into Christmas and always fixed a huge thanksgiving dinner.

 

[arkieb1]

I really miss my mom around the holidays even after 19 years.
Her birthday was dec 24th and she was big into Christmas and always fixed a huge thanksgiving dinner.

Yes - I agree, I think if we lose people close to us that also makes the holiday season a more difficult one!!!

Not to mention the over commercialisation of it, when the Christmas stuff goes out into the shops before Halloween I'm like no it's that time of year again *sigh.*

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

Nope, I love the holidays. We start on St. Martin's day with a community parade for the kids and my official end is Dec. 6th - the traditional"galette des rois". It is a truly magical time for the kids!
But I do see the downside of family complications , stress, overcommercialisation etc...
I hope my kids will keep the same memories as me of cozyness, comfort, family time. Not gifts/stress/shopping.
And yes, I miss those who are gone even more during the holidays.

 

[Arcadian]

I don't specifically hate christmas as much as I don't bother with it. My parents LOVE christmas, not only for the commercial aspects. Even as a child I indulged them on it. The Santa Clause Fraud became clear to me at the age of 4. And I learned about Jesus being a spring/summer baby when I was roughly 8-9. and the why of the holiday and the Church's involvement. That was enough for me.

What I don't do is intentionally kill off other people's christmas. If they love it, thats cool with me. But like Columbus Day, for me its a day rooted in fakery. I treat it like any other day .

In December I celebrate my birthday. I stopped waiting for gifts when I left home. I also celebrate our anniversary.

I don't mind Turkey Day, that at least has some real history behind it (though flawed).

 

[AGBF]

I love the holidays on which my extended family gets together: Easter; Thanksgiving; and Christmas because those are the times that I get to spend time with my extended family. We do the same thing for each of the holidays; only the food and the decorations vary. Now that my brother's and my first cousins' children have finished college and gotten jobs in different parts of the country, they do not always make it back to Connecticut for the same holidays. Christmas is usually a fairly large gathering, but it is a rare year when everyone can make it. We generally do not fight at all. If an argument erupts, it may be over a word in a game we play after dinner. (that is what we do: play group board games.) Everyone brings food to the feasts. I love the holidays, but Christmas is my favorite because I love so much more about it than just my family's gathering. I love the baking and the music on the radio and going to see a live production of "The Messiah" or "Amahl and The Night Vsitors". I also love the Christmas lights that people put out. I ask my daughter if she wants to drive around in the cold to see the displays in the neighborhoods where people really knock themselves out with the lights.

For me Christmas is a time of reverence, but also a time of pure joy. I always put out a hammered tin Mexican creche, but, as I said, I love the lights, too.

AGBF

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

I enjoy them because we do them on our own terms. I do not rush around to visit every family member on the planet. We keep things relaxed and do what we feel like doing. I think it's usually the pressure from other people that can ruin it.

 

[redwood66]

I love Thanksgiving and Christmas and always have. This year I will be especially grateful because for the first time in 7 years both of my sons will be home. So the tree will be up and lights will be on. So glad DH is home from the hospital but he won't enjoy the dinner this week as much as the three of us. I have plenty to be grateful for.

 

[kenny]

I don't hate people, but I am an introvert.
They just drain the energy out of me.
I enjoy a person whom I like, but only one at a time.
Add a third person to the room and it requires a huge effort to not withdraw.
I love conversations that matter and are real, but I hate small talk ... torture.

These two holidays force onto us these two things that I hate.
... oh, yeah, then there's the commercialization and how most people are stressed out this time of year.

Once decades ago did I try to host the T-Day thing with all the trimmings.
It took like 127 units of effort for maybe 3 units of benefit or pleasure, not worth it by a long shot.
For some reason I reluctantly dragged Christmas up the hill of life till a few years ago, but I've finally released that burden too.
I'm much happier now this time of year, but I get shit from a lot of people for not playing.
I guess people can't vary.

Maybe it was growing up in a beyond-disfunctional family.

 

[monarch64]

I enjoy the tree decorating part of things, and the gift giving. I'm not a believer in the actual holy day of christmas, but the pagan stuff like trees with lights and ornaments appeals to me immensely. Thanksgiving has evolved several times for me over the years into a very casual thing--nice meals with friends and family and an excuse to get together and make some seriously delicious comfort foods. I no longer have expectations of any holiday, period, and it makes life a lot easier.

For Thanksgiving this year, my daughter and I are going to my parents' home early and will spend the night. We're going to bake cookies and make treats and food all day, and I am SUPER EXCITED for once! We will come home and put the tree up and decorate it on Friday. (I don't do that Black Friday shopping craziness!)

 

[whitewave]

I think Thanksgiving is getting absorbed by Christmas and will soon be like July 4th or Labor Day.

I could give it up.

 

[t-c]

I don’t particularly buy into the whole symbolic or historic part of Christmas and Thanksgiving. But I like the fact that it is a break from the normal, a chance to get-together with family and friends, and eat awesome food!

 

[stracci2000]

I have a love/hate relationship with Christmas.
The holidays are all about consumerism. Buy, buy, buy!!! So much pressure from retailers!
Also, I can't stand Christmas music.
I watch PBS so I don't have to see or hear Christmas commercials.
I can't even imagine how awful it is for Non-Christians to put up with this time of year.
On the other hand, I like the days off from work!
And the food, of course.

 

[GreenPapaya]

No, I don't hate it, I love this time of the year! I'm a Buddhist and atheist, and have never celebrated Christmas or Thanksgiving (being a former refugee) growing up. My kids know it's about spending time with family and friends and they're at an age where they still get excited about presents. We're in NYC so my kids love going to see the tree, Rockefeller, Macy's windows, ice-skating, although we draw the line at Thanksgiving Day parade. I've touched on the different religions that have holidays in Sep - December, but I'm not sure how much of it has sunk in - they're mostly excited about the lights, food and presents. I think it's nice to have something to look forward to instead of dreary winter LOL. And then in January I'm wishing Spring and Summer would hurry up and get here. We don't do Easter, although it's close enough to our New Year that I'll throw in an egg hunt and chocolates too. The only thing I hate about this time of the year is the weather. I hate being cold.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Love Thanksgiving but hate hosting it, therefore we just celebrate the four of us with a low key dinner at home. I found a couple of years ago a turkey dinner that Costco puts together so you pretty much just throw it in the oven, perfect for us.

Christmas, love Christmas but hate family drama. DH's cousin usually hosts but some people get invited for dinner and some only for dessert so then that causes drama. Honestly I just enjoy watching kids open their presents and the desserts of course.

 

[TooPatient]

I have a love/hate relationship with Christmas.
The holidays are all about consumerism. Buy, buy, buy!!! So much pressure from retailers!
Also, I can't stand Christmas music.
I watch PBS so I don't have to see or hear Christmas commercials.
I can't even imagine how awful it is for Non-Christians to put up with this time of year.
On the other hand, I like the days off from work!
And the food, of course.

As a non-Christian, I can say that it gets slightly tiring some days as I just want to go about my normal day and not have to remember to bring my USB in the car to avoid the radio.
That said, I LOVE to see people happy and it makes me happy to see people get to celebrate in ways that make them happy. I don't mind people wishing me a merry Christmas. I simply smile and let them know I don't celebrate but hope they and their loved ones have a wonderful Christmas.


Thanksgiving... I have a love/hate thing going with it. I love seeing my grandparents so happy to have the family together. I dislike that many years have drama.
I have taken over all of the cooking but we still serve it at my grandparents' house. So cook 2 turkeys and all the sides for 20 people and drive it (in batches as it won't all fit) more than an hour away while somehow serving everything hot at the same time.

 

[monarch64]

Love Thanksgiving but hate hosting it, therefore we just celebrate the four of us with a low key dinner at home. I found a couple of years ago a turkey dinner that Costco puts together so you pretty much just throw it in the oven, perfect for us.

Guess what? YOU CAN MAKE THANKSGIVING DINNER IN THE DISHWASHER!!!
http://entertainment.chubbiesshorts.com/2017/11/cook-thanksgiving-dinner-in-the-dishwasher.html

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Guess what? YOU CAN MAKE THANKSGIVING DINNER IN THE DISHWASHER!!!
http://entertainment.chubbiesshorts.com/2017/11/cook-thanksgiving-dinner-in-the-dishwasher.html

OMG I can't wrap my mind around putting food in the dishwasher

It just seems unnatural no? What's next eating in the shower? No wait instead of steaming veggies just throw them in a colander and hang them over the shower head while you shower....voila'!

 

[monarch64]

OMG I can't wrap my mind around putting food in the dishwasher

It just seems unnatural no? What's next eating in the shower? No wait instead of steaming veggies just throw them in a colander and hang them over the shower head while you shower....voila'!

Nah, I think it just works because of the temperature of the dishwasher! I thought it was pretty impressive that someone thought to do it. I remember living without an oven for about 8 months...I made EVERYTHING in the outdoor grill. Everything. Brownies, cookies, pizzas, you name it! Maybe the dishwasher dinner idea is for those folks who are missing some typical appliances? LOL

 

[Gussie]

I LOVE the entire season!!! Yes, I am one of those people, lol! I listen to Christmas music the day after Halloween, put up 3 out of 4 trees before Thanksgiving, have presents wrapped under my tree already. We always go out of town for thanksgiving so I dont feel bad about getting things done early. I spend time with my kids teaching them to bake treats for all of our friends. I embrace it all and I love it! It makes me feel very grateful and joyous! !! I always get a little weepy eyed the first time I hear "Little Drummer Boy". On my deathbed please send Harry Connick Jr to sing me "White Christmas"...


Here is Rudy - he gets all festive this time of year!

 

[AGBF]

I don't hate people, but I am an introvert.
They just drain the energy out of me.
I enjoy a person whom I like, but only one at a time.
Add a third person to the room and it requires a huge effort to not withdraw.
I love conversations that matter and are real, but I hate small talk ... torture.

These two holidays force onto us these two things that I hate.
... oh, yeah, then there's the commercialization and how most people are stressed out this time of year.

Once decades ago did I try to host the T-Day thing with all the trimmings.
It took like 127 units of effort for maybe 3 units of benefit or pleasure, not worth it by a long shot.
For some reason I reluctantly dragged Christmas up the hill of life till a few years ago, but I've finally released that burden too.
I'm much happier now this time of year, but I get shit from a lot of people for not playing.
I guess people can't vary.

Maybe it was growing up in a beyond-disfunctional family.

I am sorry that you tried so hard for so long to do things that gave you little pleasure, kenny. I was a very, very screwed up child, but I came from a loving family. I just managed to be screwed up anyway.

I am sorry you came from a dysfunctional family.

While I can remember all my neurotic symptoms, I also remember warm, loving family gatherings. At least I had those.

Hugs to you.
Deb

 

[kenny]

Thank Deb.
Yeah, people are complex.
I don't think anyone knows for sure how much of how we 'turn out' is nature or nurture.

 

[arkieb1]

I guess maybe part of it is that here it's hot and summer..... Like one of those days in the US where you all complain about the temperature being way too hot, so take that, then add in people usually not getting along and food, stress, and that is what it is. I dropped all expectations of it being anything one way or the other a long time ago, that did help. And we simply don't have Thanksgiving or an equivalent day like that in Australia.

It was probably more difficult for my father because his father (my grandfather) had Alzheimer's for a decade or more, and my father would sit with him very patiently talking to him about things waiting for some glimmer of recognition and the simple truth was there were a lot of years when he had no clue who any of us were.

 

[yennyfire]

At the risk of sounding like a curmudgeon, I'll say that I love the IDEA of Thanksgiving and Hanukkah, but I get tired of all of the cooking, gift shopping (I loathe shopping), etc. I've tried to suggest that we pick a charity to donate to each year in lieu of gifts, but my sister, mother, daughter and nieces all love to shop so I'm outnumbered. We do take turns (my sister and I) hosting holiday's, so this year, I'm doing Thanksgiving and she will host Hanukkah. It's still a couple of full days of cooking/prep for a meal that's consumed in 20 min. I'd be just as happy eating pizza with my family, although I do love turkey and all of the trimmings....I just wish it wasn't so much effort.

Kenny, I get the introverted thing. I'm like you in tbat way. I appear animated, engaged and outgoing, but the effort I expend to do so is tremendous.

Good for you for recognizing what you want to do and doing it, not doing what others "expect" of you.

Being Jewish while living in the South, where everything is Christmas from October on, gets kind of old, especially for my kids, who get it at school despite the supposed separation of church and state. But it is what it is and I would never presume to suck the joy out of anyone else's holiday....

 

[Bonfire]

Thank Deb.
Yeah, people are complex.
I don't think anyone knows for sure how much of how we 'turn out' is nature or nurture.

It’s both...in varying degrees.

I’m always glad when the holidays are over! I do love Thanksgiving and HATE how Christmas steps all over it.

 

[AGBF]

It’s both...in varying degrees.

I’m always glad when the holidays are over! I do love Thanksgiving and HATE how Christmas steps all over it.

The only thing I have come to dislike about the American Thanksgiving is the shopping. I do not know why it became the national shopping day. It and the day(s) that follow. I remember when stores were closed on both Sundays and holidays (not that I actually believe stores should have been closed on the sabbath of one specific religion). It was just nice not to have the frenetic pace we have now. Is that what you meant, Bonfire? I remember when it was, "Over the river and through the woods".

Deb

 

[MissGotRocks]

I love the holidays! I love the special feel of them, special foods, beautiful sights and many happy memories. I have had to work as hard as anyone to cook, shop and decorate but loved it all the same. Now that my children are grown and I have grandchildren my workload is not as bad - my kids are doing the same things I did and I get to enjoy the fruits of their labor too! I do remember as a child the feeling of waiting for Santa. It wasn't ruined as it is today with Santa in every store and on every television commercial. It was really special back then and so much more believable than it is today. Still, the kids of today still seem to enjoy the anticipation of it all. There is a time for everything though and when it is over, I am happy to get back to my normal routine.

 

[Dancing Fire]

At the risk of sounding like a curmudgeon, I'll say that I love the IDEA of Thanksgiving and Hanukkah, but I get tired of all of the cooking, gift shopping (I loathe shopping),

Yenny
Nothing too expensive for me. Remember, it is the thought that counts...

 

[yennyfire]

Yenny
Nothing too expensive for me. Remember, it is the thought that counts...

It's not even the money, it's trying to find something the recipient will like, as we are all pretty spoiled and want for nothing. It makes shopping really, really hard. You're easy DF! Diamonds, right?!

 

[Bonfire]

The only thing I have come to dislike about the American Thanksgiving is the shopping. I do not know why it became the national shopping day. It and the day(s) that follow. I remember when stores were closed on both Sundays and holidays (not that I actually believe stores should have been closed on the sabbath of one specific religion). It was just nice not to have the frenetic pace we have now. Is that what you meant, Bonfire? I remember when it was, "Over the river and through the woods".
Deb

“...to grandmother’s house we go.” I don’t equate Thanksgiving with shopping and Black Friday or frantic shopping sales. I don’t participate in that. I love traditional Thanksgiving. Fall and the big turkey meal (I make a kicka$$ pumpkin pie) parades, football and family coming together. Nothing upstages my Thanksgiving. Gobble gobble!
I wait until December to start on Christmas. I do find the shopping very frustrating though.