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How to respond

motownmama

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 9, 2008
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8,207
There're tons of luxury items that aren't rare (cars, watches, purses) , so it's a weird comment. IDK what I would say, bc I don't like to "feed the trolls" per se, but maybe I'd say "I'm just fascinated that someone has worn this diamond for over 100 years!" - and leave it at that.
You say you have kids, so obviously you've experienced ppl say things JUST bc they want to get a reaction from you. I'm always telling my crew - "You just gave them exactly what they wanted - a reaction!"
 

Batgirl76

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 7, 2018
Messages
252
“Real is Rare” is the tag line of De Beers’ latest multi-million dollar ad campaign, which is designed to convince Millennials that they should buy questionably ethical newly mined diamonds instead of lab grown. So obviously De Beers’ market research team determined that falsely implied rarity would persuade these mostly cash-strapped young men and women to pay THOUSANDS of $$$$ more for an identical diamond.
 

Mrs_Strizzle

Brilliant_Rock
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Jun 14, 2018
Messages
1,567
@Batgirl76 I believe the heirloom aspect is something some may consider as well for mined diamonds. I think about the synthetic sapphires and rubies from the early 1900s that at the time were all the rage (marketing to convince the masses man made was better). Now those jewels sell for the value of the setting and perhaps a brand name, but the synthetic stones themselves hold no monetary value. I have 5 children (and who knows how many future grandchildren), and would love to pass down to them my treasures that made me happy AND hold a monetary value if need be.
 

Bonfire

Ideal_Rock
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Feb 22, 2014
Messages
4,232
Why do you feel it‘s necessary to even respond? People seem to feel it’s required to throw jabs or have a witty retort to someone’s comments. Why even engage? It doesn’t prove their argument by not responding. Who cares? Don’t take the bait.
 

Daisys and Diamonds

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 30, 2019
Messages
22,510
Thank you all for your good advice. I know you all are absolutely right about not letting anyone steal my rainbow, and I certainly wasn't going to. I love my ring and don't care what others think. My Bill's are paid, kids are fed, and I can buy what I want that makes me happy. I just enjoy pointing out to these know-it-alls some other viewpoints that they often fail to see. I was interested to hear if anyone had any data that may contradict that viewpoint, like the debate over if lab diamonds are really more eco friendly when you consider the amount of energy that is currently needed to produce diamond, etc. @denverappraiser thank you for some hard numbers, it certainly puts it more in perspective! 20191120_131044.jpg @Daisys and Diamonds here's a pic, since you twisted my arm;)2

i love it !
she must feel so sad when she gets left at home
 

Daisys and Diamonds

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 30, 2019
Messages
22,510
I have a neighbor like this who frequently makes a snarky critique of any change we make to our place. With her I’ve found it’s easiest to say “Well, I’m happy with it. Now please excuse me as I need to go to the bathroom/mailbox/whatever”. They aren’t more knowledgeable or woke, they are just rude; and rude people tend to stay rude throughout their life.

im going to try this one
"well im happy with it"
we are doing something i could fraze as experimental in our back yard letting and encouraging the lawn area to rewild
one of Gary's friends in particular who is a terrible town gossip (a trait i dislike) told me to think of the neighbours
- the neighbours can't even see it - our back yard is enclosed and we have high fences

thank you kgizo
 

Johnbt

Shiny_Rock
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Mar 13, 2018
Messages
313
"But the older I get the more I’m convinced that buying pre-loved or lab-grown is a much more thoughtful choice."

When I shopped in early 2018 there wasn't much, if any, selection of well documented, used super ideal round diamonds in the E or F VVS range. When I narrowed the search to 1.5 to 2.1 carat stones I realized I was wasting my time.
 

arkieb1

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
May 11, 2012
Messages
9,786
There are a lot of coloured gemstones that are much rarer than diamonds..... having said that you have a large diamond, by general standards - so the people you work with are probably making uncalled for judgement calls or comments about that. What you do with your money is no one else's business!!!
 

denverappraiser

Ideal_Rock
Trade
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Jul 21, 2004
Messages
9,150
@denverappraiser According to IGS, “De Beers maintains a LARGE WAREHOUSE of uncut diamonds in London”.

I may be, as you so gently hinted, an “idiot”, but I do know how to find basic information on the internet. Here is the IGS article:


In it’s most conspiratorial version, DeBeers, until recently a public company that had public reporting requirements, holds $5B worth of inventory backed by sales of about $2B/year. Most would call that too much, but it’s not a ‘large warehouse’ by any stretch. Then again, if it’s on the Internet it must be true.



https://www.bloomberg.com/news/arti...e-as-many-diamonds-as-it-mines-to-clear-stock
 

denverappraiser

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 21, 2004
Messages
9,150
@Batgirl76
I’m inclined to agree that the ‘Real is Rare’ is one of the dumbest campaigns I’ve seen recently. That said, it’s perhaps worth noting that it isn’t DeBeers. It’s the Diamond Producers Association. That’s a private club of diamond mining companies. Last I looked they had 7 members and DeBeers wasn't even the largest. DeBeers got out of the business of generically promoting diamonds about 20 years ago (that was the campaign of shadow people with the tagline ‘a diamond is forever’) over declining market share and high costs. They left something of a hole in the market. The idea was that the retailers would step up and do their own advertising, but it didn’t really work. They just kept on keeping on, confident that the market was solid. Meanwhile, their market share dropped to well below 40%. I’m shedding no tears for them, a 40% share of the global market in anything is nothing to sneeze at, but it’s nothing like the monopoly that most people think they are.

 

bludiva

Ideal_Rock
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Sep 23, 2017
Messages
3,076
I don't think you need to respond personally but if it were me I'd say "well I like it" and move on.... enjoy!
 

denverappraiser

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jul 21, 2004
Messages
9,150
For those who like to follow this sort of thing, here’s a review of the diamond industry by Bain&co. It’s written from the perspective of corporate investment advice rather than a review of the products, but it’s a pretty broad view of the diamond business. They’ve done this every year for the last 8 and it makes for some interesting beach reading.

https://www.bain.com/insights/global-diamond-industry-report-2018/
 

cmd2014

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Aug 6, 2014
Messages
2,541
Wow. I can't even imagine someone being so rude. I guess how I answered would depend on the power structure at work and how much peace you are expected to keep. You could joke and say "well someone's jealous!" you could say "well, I like it" or you could say "wow, that's really rude. People are allowed to do what makes them happy and I'm not sure you get an opinion on that." (or as an alternative and if they are much younger than you "you know, I am from a different generation than you, but I was always taught that if you can't say anything nice, maybe you shouldn't say anything at all").
 

Batgirl76

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 7, 2018
Messages
252
 

Starfacet

Ideal_Rock
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Nov 25, 2017
Messages
2,009
I might say, "Well, guess I drank the Kool-aid."
 

msop04

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Dec 3, 2011
Messages
10,051
The repercussions of wearing a large diamond ring at work can be more serious than hurt feelings from “woke” coworkers’ comments:



Good grief. This article is ridiculous. How about this... wear the ring you love and to hell with everyone else. People are going to think whatever they want. After all, what anyone else thinks about me is none of my business.
 

AprilBaby

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 17, 2008
Messages
13,234
I’m old enough to not care.
 

GeliL

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 30, 2018
Messages
276
I would probably say "well something rare would be 1000x the price, and everything we buy is a marketing ploy". Which is not wrong.

There are a lot of people who criticize what others spend their money on but it's not their money & not their business. I'd just stare at my pretty jewelry and go about my merry day.
 

PreRaphaelite

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 2, 2015
Messages
3,564
Raise your left eyebrow, stare straight into their eyes, and dryly retort, “Hmm, I used the think diamonds were vulgar....

...until I had some.”

Drop your eyebrow back into place and walk away.
Eventually the sting will hit. They will never comment again!

Or there’s always this other Mae West quote:
F2D6F75C-29F7-472A-A7A3-A13FF23487EC.gif
 
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mrs-b

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Aug 18, 2013
Messages
11,542
Just tell them that altho a GOOD diamond is indeed rare, it's not nearly as rare as a well mannered person.

Then let them figure that one out by themselves.

Just on the 'is it rare' argument - of course they are - what a daft comment. We're not talking about anything that qualifies as compressed carbon here. In your case, we're talking huge, beautiful, antique, character-filled beauties worthy of an experienced PSer. And those are INDEED rare. Very.

Of the 7.5 billion people in the world, the vast majority would, from time to time, have hummed a tune. But there was only one Pavarotti. When it comes to diamonds, the vast majority wouldn't pass the bar you set for what you wanted, so your diamond is VERY rare. And anybody who tries to persist in 'educating you' to the contrary - either in real life or on this thread - should, as they say, put a sock in it.

ETA And many thanks to @denverappraiser for bringing, once again, a little clarity to this ridiculous argument.
 

LLJsmom

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Oct 24, 2012
Messages
12,633
“Whatever” with dismissive finger wave and turning your back on them.
 

Johnbt

Shiny_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 13, 2018
Messages
313
"...holds $5B worth of inventory backed by sales of about $2B/year"

$2B/year? Dang, how does De Beers stay in business? :)

"Apple revenue for the quarter ending September 30, 2019 was $64.040B " That's for 3 months.
 

cmd2014

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 6, 2014
Messages
2,541
The repercussions of wearing a large diamond ring at work can be more serious than hurt feelings from “woke” coworkers’ comments:


Imaginary audience much? Sounds like someone hasn't moved beyond that stage of adolescence where it's normal to imagine that everyone is looking at you and thinking about you (because...narcissism). It also sounds like her feelings about her ring are more about what SHE thinks about her ring than what anyone else has said. Probably because she works for some kind of publication that espouses Financial Independence and Retire Early philosophies.

The truth is that people will make judgements about other people for all sorts of reasons. Height, weight, ethnicity, the style of clothing you wear (and the perceived price), your hairstyle, your makeup, how you hold yourself, how you shake hands, how you speak. You can try to control that if this is important to you personally or professionally (and many of us do - by wearing work appropriate clothing and accessories that are well suited to the culture that we work in, by matching our hair and makeup choices to the culture in which we work, and by presenting ourselves well when we know that it is going to count). But you get to a certain stage in life (established at work, established personally), and you really do stop caring whether someone things your ring is too big. Honestly, many, many professional women sport rather impressive rings - and it means absolutely nothing about whether or not they want to work and be promoted in their particular fields. And many have bought those rings for themselves. Along with all of their other jewelry.
 

OboeGal

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 22, 2017
Messages
916

This article - and the other one, as well as the articles referenced within those articles - seem to me to be less specifically about a ring than they are about the kinds of garbage women still have to deal with in the workplace around being treated on the basis of only her capabilities and work performance and in terms of her personal work/life decisions around marriage and children.
 
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