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Asking Parents

P: 11/2/2008 2:46:33 PM
IamTheLuckiest Rough Rock Total Posts: 1 Last Post: 11/2/2008 Member Since: 11/2/2008	I have dated my GF for 5 yrs and am planning my proposal for the coming spring. It is important to both of us that we have both sets of parents blessing of the wedding (we get along great with both) and even more importantly are welcomed into each others families. My question is about when to tell/ask both sets of parents. Her parents live many states away and mine live many states away in another direction, so it will be difficult to ask everyone in a timely manner. I need to ask my parents first because I am hoping to use a family diamond for the ring. We are going to my house for Thanksgiving so that shouldnt be a problem. The next opportunity to ask her parents in person would be Christmas. I do not want to propose over the Christmas holiday if possible because 1) We both want it to be a surprise and thats too predictable, 2) I'm not sure I will have the ring ready in time and 3) My proposal idea requires spring weather (dont want to explain in case she's reading). Is it cruel to make our families wait until the spring for the proposal? Should I tell them when and how I am going to do it if I make them wait? Both moms are bad with secrets, so I would worry that the secret would be ruined. I would love any thoughts or suggestions - thanks in advance!
Posted: 11/2/2008 2:46:33 PM

There are 2 replies to this message. There are 2 replies on this page.

P: 11/14/2008 1:31:07 PM
tabu Cut Rock Total Posts: 205 Last Post: 1/13/2009 Member Since: 11/13/2008	Hey, I noticed no one responded yet to your thread so I thought I would try to help you out! I think telling your paretns on Thanksgiving is perfect since you will be together, however, since they are bad with secrets, don't tell them your plans just yet. Just ask for their blessing first and tell them any other details at a later date. Then to ask her parents on Christmas is also perfect since you will again, be together. I do not think the parents need to know the details of the engagement, as long as you have their blessing for the "go-ahead." The engagement is just between you and your girl. So, good luck and I hope all goes well! Let us know how it goes ~ October 9, 2009 ~
Posted: 11/14/2008 1:31:07 PM

P: 11/14/2008 6:35:56 PM
KeepItSecret Rough Rock Total Posts: 30 Last Post: 4/18/2009 Member Since: 5/2/2008	I would definitely hold off as long as possible if you intend to keep it a secret from your girlfriend. I don't care how much you trust your mother or father, someone will slip up if adequate time is given. The mother will start acting all funny giving clues or your father will try to make a corny joke at the wrong time. If you have to get a family ring then obviously you need a little extra time but if not I wouldn't ask for a parents blessing any sooner than 1 week in advance. With proper planning all things are possible.
Posted: 11/14/2008 6:35:56 PM

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