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Question about tipping at wedding

P: 1/9/2008 10:06:45 AM
the rube Ideal Rock Total Posts: 1,934 Last Post: 10/15/2009 Member Since: 10/22/2007	I'm having a man I know from high school play classical guitar for my wedding ceremony. He is only playing during the ceremony and then afterward he is going to be a regular guest at the wedding, him and his wife. He has asked that I pay him $100 for his services, to which I agreed. I did hope that he would play for free because he'll be at the wedding anyway, but I suppose he probably wouldn't have been invited if he wasn't playing, because we're not extremely close friends. I'm working on my budget today, and so my question is should I tip him on top of his fee? Or should I consider us even with what I'll pay for his and his wife's dinner, drinks and hors de oeuvres ($70 per head)? And why do I worry so much about these things? ........................ You say you want diamonds in a ring of gold...but all I want is you...
Posted: 1/9/2008 10:06:45 AM

There are 8 replies to this message. There are 8 replies on this page.

P: 1/9/2008 11:10:05 AM
musey Ideal Rock Total Posts: 11,162 Last Post: 11/23/2009 Member Since: 9/30/2006	I've been wondering about this very thing, so I really hope someone chimes in with some answers We're planning to have a friend play classical guitar during the ceremony.
Posted: 1/9/2008 11:10:05 AM

P: 1/9/2008 12:09:52 PM
glueck Cut Rock Total Posts: 361 Last Post: 7/13/2009 Member Since: 11/30/2007	My experience.... Hope this is helpful to you Im a professional opera singer and have sung at MANY a wedding from NYC elite to small ceremonies. Never have I been tipped. I'm not sure why the wait staff gets tipped for their work and not the talent staff, but so it goes.((Grumble grumble!!!)) That being said, Ive never sung in a wedding where I charged a fee and been invited to the reception. For friends when I charged no fee- merely took part in their special day- I came to the reception and received a small gift and was invited to wedding party activites. **It seems funny to me that he would accept a fee and a reception invite for him AND his wife. IMHO, If you are close enough to be invited to the reception, you should be close enough to comp your services. For what its worth, you've paid out enough for your guitarist. No guilt over not tipping him! "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." When Harry Met Sally
Posted: 1/9/2008 12:09:52 PM

P: 1/9/2008 12:15:57 PM
BeeCushion Cut Rock Total Posts: 412 Last Post: 1/14/2009 Member Since: 7/11/2007	I wouldn't tip him. We also have a friend that I want to play guitar at our wedding, HOWEVER, he is FI's best friend AND best man, so that changes things for us. I expect that he won't charge and wouldn't expect a tip. I think that we might give him an extra special gift though, seeing as how he's best man and playing guitar and all that. (BTW - Musey - I freakin' LOVE LOVE LOVE your new avatar!!!! )
Posted: 1/9/2008 12:15:57 PM

P: 1/9/2008 12:27:44 PM
curlygirl Ideal Rock Total Posts: 2,301 Last Post: 11/22/2009 Member Since: 4/9/2005	I wouldn't tip him. Give him $100 in cash and let him and his wife enjoy your party--that's his tip!
Posted: 1/9/2008 12:27:44 PM

P: 1/9/2008 2:35:00 PM
bee* Ideal Rock Total Posts: 11,097 Last Post: 11/22/2009 Member Since: 5/14/2006	I wouldn't tip him. But then I live in Ireland and we hardly tip at all with anything.
Posted: 1/9/2008 2:35:00 PM

P: 1/9/2008 2:37:40 PM
Independent Gal Ideal Rock Total Posts: 5,471 Last Post: 1/3/2009 Member Since: 11/12/2006	I'm with the others. The $100 IS his tip!
Posted: 1/9/2008 2:37:40 PM

P: 1/9/2008 7:25:44 PM
gtn Ideal Rock Total Posts: 748 Last Post: 12/5/2008 Member Since: 10/24/2007	Wow. I can't believe he asked for money and then is turning around to go to the reception. Maybe he needs the cash. Even then, that's odd. Pay him the $100 and call it a day. You are already paying $140 for their meals. Just consider it $240 for musician.
Posted: 1/9/2008 7:25:44 PM

P: 1/10/2008 10:34:45 AM
the rube Ideal Rock Total Posts: 1,934 Last Post: 10/15/2009 Member Since: 10/22/2007	Really? Was it outlandish of him to ask for money? I suppose it's true. None of my other paid vendors are attending my wedding as a guest. Haha - what a jerk. But, like I said, he is not a "close" friend and would not be invited to the wedding if it weren't for the fact that he'll be playing. Oh well. I already promised him the money. I'd better get a good wedding gift!! ........................ You say you want diamonds in a ring of gold...but all I want is you...
Posted: 1/10/2008 10:34:45 AM

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