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 Bachelorette Party Grrr...

P:  11/21/2007 2:59:14 PM  
robbie3982
robbie3982

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One of my friends from hs is getting married on Saturday.  Tonight is her bachelorette party.  I set the invitation on the couch after reading it and the cats have since stolen it and hidden it who knows where. 

I texted the bride to get the address and also just wanted to make sure that I still needed only $10 to chip in for the van/bus that's taking everyone home.  She texted back that I need $50 a couple (it's a joint bachelorette/bachelor party) to cover van, food, drink, games, prizes and favors...uh...seriously???  I think that's kinda ridiculous!  And I'm sure that this is the first time anyone has mentioned to me that I need to bring $50.  I'd skip it but I feel like I have to go since I already said I was going (even though she said she was coming to mine and then didn't show up and didn't even call to say why until weeks later ).  Why would you expect guests to pay for favors and games???  I can understand paying for drinks and food, but it's at a freakin club!  Why wouldn't we just pay for the drinks we're actually drinking???

Sorry, I'm really annoyed and needed to get it out.
********************************
Baby Desmond Jacob arrived on 6/28. So in love with my little man!
Posted:  11/21/2007 2:59:14 PM

 There are 17 replies to this message.  There are 17 replies on this page.

P: 11/21/2007 3:03:44 PM
SanDiegoLady
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Hugs.. I'm sorry honey. Uh.. I dont think its standard to pay to go to a party.. I dont think I've ever heard of such a thing.. What if you dont drink?








Posted:  11/21/2007 3:03:44 PM
P: 11/21/2007 3:10:52 PM
TravelingGal
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Well, that does sound a bit off....

But if it's only 25 bucks each per person, and you get to party with your man, and all food and drink is paid for during the course of the evening, plus you get transportation, that doesn't sound like an awful deal?

_______________________

Travel quote of the week: "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." -Mark Twain

Posted:  11/21/2007 3:10:52 PM
P: 11/21/2007 4:12:22 PM
Steel
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I am with you Robbie, this would make my blood boil.

I do not like people dictating to me as to how I spend my money.  I agree with Tgal that overall the amt of money is not excessive when divided out but good grief some folks micro manage everything.  It is excessive and unnecessary.


Robbie could your cat manage to eat/hide your calendar also so you 'forget' which day it is on and spend the money on cat treats (or whatever) instead?

Posted:  11/21/2007 4:12:22 PM
P: 11/21/2007 4:22:43 PM
Harleigh
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Ugh, Robbie, I am sooo sorry!  I think you should misplace the invite or come up with a "sudden" illness that prevents you from making it.  Who does a bachelorette party the night before Thanksgiving, anyways??? 

Best of luck with whatever you decide!  If you go, let us know how it goes.

Harleigh

**********

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Posted:  11/21/2007 4:22:43 PM
P: 11/21/2007 4:44:18 PM
Sabine
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Awe, is DH even going to be able to go with you?  Couldn't you use traffic as an excuse to get out of it?

Posted:  11/21/2007 4:44:18 PM
P: 11/21/2007 4:58:51 PM
robbie3982
robbie3982

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Thanks for the responses guys.

TravelingGal, you're right, it is only $25 a person and she's my friend so I'll suck it up and deal with it.  It just really makes me mad that I was informed about it so last minute and also that they just expect everyone to split the bill like that when it would be really easy to have everyone pay their own.  I know we won't be drinking nearly as much as the other people there.  The prizes and party favors annoy me too.  That should definitely have been handled by the bridal party.  Honestly, I wouldn't have cared if there were no prizes or favors.

Steel, I wish we could get out of it, but I'm going to be the bigger person here.  I was so disappointed when she bailed on mine.  Plus her MOH sucks and "forgot to call off work" so she's not coming (totally different when you couldn't come to mine, Sabine, since you live 5 hrs away).  She's not making it to the rehearsal either!  I'm going to chalk this up to bridezilla syndrome seeing as her wedding is less than a week away.  Plus, she really shouldn't have had to do anything for the party beyond showing up anyway.  The BMs should've handled this...I wonder if the other guests know they have to pay $50...

Harleigh, I'll be sure to update you guys on how it goes.

Sabine,  DH is invited and we're both going.  The in-laws are dropping us off and then we're taking the drunk bus back to their house after.  He's slightly less opposed to going since I told him that there will be a mariokart contest.

********************************
Baby Desmond Jacob arrived on 6/28. So in love with my little man!

Posted:  11/21/2007 4:58:51 PM
P: 11/22/2007 12:47:05 AM
Asscherhalo_lover
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wow, you are def the bigger person in this situation....

mmmm...diamonds.....

Posted:  11/22/2007 12:47:05 AM
P: 11/22/2007 1:36:23 AM
heraanderson
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I know I'm in the minority on this one, but I think it's a good price for a couple for transportation, food, drinks etc.  I've spent way more than that for a bachelorette party.  I can get where you're coming from, but I think that it's working out in your favor. 

Posted:  11/22/2007 1:36:23 AM
P: 11/22/2007 9:45:31 AM
basisforaday
basisforaday

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So you lost the invitation and are mad at your friend that you weren't aware of the details?

Posted:  11/22/2007 9:45:31 AM
P: 11/22/2007 2:35:30 PM
luckystar112
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Date: 11/22/2007 9:45:31 AM
Author: basisforaday
So you lost the invitation and are mad at your friend that you weren't aware of the details?

Ugh...If I'm not mistaken, I don't think the invitation mentioned $50. I got the impression that she was TOLD it was $10.


Robbie, you're definitely a bigger person than me. I probably wouldn't have even gone.

Posted:  11/22/2007 2:35:30 PM
P: 11/22/2007 4:15:23 PM
basisforaday
basisforaday

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she implied from the post that she wasn't sure eitherway.  If she had planned on going (which it sounds like she was since she texted for information on the price), she should have planned on paying as etiquitte would suggest.  $25 for a person for transportation, favors, and drinks is more then resaonable.  The fact that she lost the invitation due to carelessness is the icing on the cake.  She is going to blame the bride to be/party planners for raising the price when for all she knows it was $50 all along.

Posted:  11/22/2007 4:15:23 PM
P: 11/22/2007 4:19:10 PM
neatfreak
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Date: 11/22/2007 4:15:23 PM
Author: basisforaday
she implied from the post that she wasn't sure eitherway. If she had planned on going (which it sounds like she was since she texted for information on the price), she should have planned on paying as etiquitte would suggest. $25 for a person for transportation, favors, and drinks is more then resaonable. The fact that she lost the invitation due to carelessness is the icing on the cake. She is going to blame the bride to be/party planners for raising the price when for all she knows it was $50 all along.




Whoa here, calm down. By saying that she wanted to check that she "still only" needed $10, implied that she did not know it was $50 pp initially. And quite honestly, I think it's pretty rude to invite someone to a party and expect them to pay!

But regardless, no need to flame anyone here...

Posted:  11/22/2007 4:19:10 PM
P: 11/22/2007 4:41:24 PM
luckystar112
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Date: 11/22/2007 4:19:10 PM
Author: neatfreak


Whoa here, calm down. By saying that she wanted to check that she 'still only' needed $10, implied that she did not know it was $50 pp initially. And quite honestly, I think it's pretty rude to invite someone to a party and expect them to pay!

But regardless, no need to flame anyone here...

DIT-TO. Especially someone who is not part of the bridal party.

Posted:  11/22/2007 4:41:24 PM
P: 11/22/2007 5:32:45 PM
bee*
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Date: 11/22/2007 4:41:24 PM
Author: luckystar112

Date: 11/22/2007 4:19:10 PM
Author: neatfreak


Whoa here, calm down. By saying that she wanted to check that she 'still only' needed $10, implied that she did not know it was $50 pp initially. And quite honestly, I think it's pretty rude to invite someone to a party and expect them to pay!

But regardless, no need to flame anyone here...

DIT-TO. Especially someone who is not part of the bridal party.

I totally agree with this.  Especially when the money is going towards things like favors and prizes-I'd much rather keep more of my own money than have it spent on things like this. You are definitely the bigger person here Robbie!

Posted:  11/22/2007 5:32:45 PM
P: 11/22/2007 6:26:56 PM
basisforaday
basisforaday

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no intention on flaming, but the purpose of a bachelor/bachelorette party is for friends of the groom/bride to take them out.  if she didn't want to pay she didn't have to go.  and to 'call and make sure it was still $10' seems a little off to me. 

If anything I would be complaining that a bride is organizing the party....

Posted:  11/22/2007 6:26:56 PM
P: 11/22/2007 9:54:10 PM
robbie3982
robbie3982

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The party was a lot of fun.  DH even had a good time despite not really knowing anyone there.

I wanted to clarify that even though I lost the invitation, I did read it and it said nothing about ANY cost involved.  All it said was come celebrate that jane and john are getting married.  The party's at x place at y time.  I just couldn't remember the start time or the address.  The only mention of money was when I was talking to the bride a few weeks ago and she said I should probably throw in $10 or something for the van if I planned on using it.  I definitely expect to pay for my own alcohol and food at a bachelorette party, but I think it's ridiculous to demand that people pay a set amount.  I definitely didn't drink $25 worth of alcohol and I only ate 2 meatballs.  I also don't think it's right to expect guests to pay for games and favors.  If the bridal party wants to have them, they should be responsible for that.  If it was for presents for the bride and groom that would be a totally different story.  I would've much rather been paying towards that than a favor that I didn't want or need.

********************************
Baby Desmond Jacob arrived on 6/28. So in love with my little man!

Posted:  11/22/2007 9:54:10 PM
P: 11/23/2007 6:34:36 AM
lauralu
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Is it not customary for whom ever is putting on the party for the bride and groom to pay for it? Than they invite guests and the bride or groom or both ....who all just come and are treated to a fun party?

I have been invited to many of those kinds of parties and even given a couple. Never did I pay unless I was one of the people hosting it.

Did the bride and groom put this on themselves and invite people?

It is sure different in my opinion...and people can surely do what they wish...I am happy you guys had a good time though.

Interesting thread thats for certain...

Posted:  11/23/2007 6:34:36 AM

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