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 The more the better?

P:  11/5/2006 7:10:48 PM  
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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So, I have this, what I think is perfect, asscher (or square emerald cut) diamond with two traps on the side. I posted some pics (although not very good ones) in the SMTR forum.

My Aunt and  another close friend mentioned to me that the traps need to be bigger and that I should add more diamonds to the ring. I guess I can understand the bigger traps, but their reasoning was "more diamonds and bigger diamonds the better"...They also instructed me to get diamond wedding bands for the ring, after I said I would prefer a plain platinum band.

Now, I am a very plain person. I don't wear jewelry (but I just LOVE it!)...so to me my 1.92 Asscher and .40cttw traps are perfect. The traps are not too big that they take away from the diamond, nor too small that you can't see them or enjoy their cut.

However, their comments made me wonder...have any of you faced similar comments?
Posted:  11/5/2006 7:10:48 PM

 There are 33 replies to this message.  There are 30 replies on this page.

P: 11/5/2006 7:16:43 PM
jazmine
jazmine

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I disagree with your aunt and friend, at least the way they are going about giving advice. For some people, the more diamonds the better, but that is not always the case. Sometimes, you would rather have a single great big diamond with few or no surrounding diamonds. It all comes down to personal preference. Some people like to wear earrings, bracelets, rings and necklaces. Some choose just one piece. If your style is simpler and more classic, that is what you should get.

Posted:  11/5/2006 7:16:43 PM
P: 11/5/2006 7:23:55 PM
Cehrabehra
Cehrabehra

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I heard something similar from my HUSBAND of all people - mr anti-diamond himself!  the ring I'm getting designed - the inspriation ring has  1pointers and he said those should be bigger and I agreed so I upped it to 1.5 pointers and he still thinks they should be bigger.... and from the sound of it he thinks they should be like 5 pointers!!!!!!  I'm like no way... they're just accent LOL  I couldn't believe he wanted bigger ones lol!  Other than that I doubt anyone will tell me I need  more LOL

Sara

The most beautiful experience we can have
is the mysterious - the fundamental emotion which
stands at the cradle of true art and true science.
~ Albert Einstein ~

Posted:  11/5/2006 7:23:55 PM
P: 11/5/2006 7:27:44 PM
decodelighted
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Puhleeze. Your ring is SHEER PERFECTION. Minimalist MAJESTY! Chic on a Stick!

Lemmie ask you this ... your Aunt ... your "other family member" ... would you take their advice about haircuts or sofas or cars. Do you admire their personal style, their every outfit, thier taste in purses or cocktails or men?

I'm guessing they fall short on one count or other in your eyes.

We all have different styles. Personally, I don't think your Asscher could be any lovelier unless it was in MY possesion! Don't let anyone bully you into unnecessary bling that will distract from what you KNOW is the star ... that ASSCHER!

I doubt Coco Chanel was cramming bling onto her bands. Her philosophy was put you accessories on and then take one thing back OFF.

Overdone ... now that's gauche!

Posted:  11/5/2006 7:27:44 PM
P: 11/5/2006 7:54:54 PM
kcoursolle
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I think the key here is what *you* want rather than them.  You are the one wearing it and you have to love it, not them.  Personally, I love the proportions on your ring and diamonds all around would be more expensive, more maintainence, and you would barely see them since most of them will be on the sides or the bottom of your finger. 

Posted:  11/5/2006 7:54:54 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:01:21 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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Jazmine- Thanks for the comment. I do believe it is personal preference; I was just surprised at the comments. Not very ¡§polite¡¨.


Cehrabehra- Wow! At least you have a husband that is willing to get you nice big stones as accents ļ


Decodelighted- I am so glad you like my ring, and knowing you are well versed in Coco Chanel makes your comments even more special, I just love her! My Aunt and friend are not those whose style I personally admire, in all the aspects you listed! They are if I may, anti-Chanel. I have this awful stereotype. People are either Marilyn Monroe types or Audrey Hepburn types¡KI am definitely an Audrey kind of gal.

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:01:21 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:02:08 PM
Lady LuLu
Lady LuLu

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Date: 11/5/2006 7:27:44 PM
Author: decodelighted
Puhleeze. Your ring is SHEER PERFECTION. Minimalist MAJESTY! Chic on a Stick!

Lemmie ask you this ... your Aunt ... your 'other family member' ... would you take their advice about haircuts or sofas or cars. Do you admire their personal style, their every outfit, thier taste in purses or cocktails or men?

I'm guessing they fall short on one count or other in your eyes.

We all have different styles. Personally, I don't think your Asscher could be any lovelier unless it was in MY possesion! Don't let anyone bully you into unnecessary bling that will distract from what you KNOW is the star ... that ASSCHER!

I doubt Coco Chanel was cramming bling onto her bands. Her philosophy was put you accessories on and then take one thing back OFF.

Overdone ... now that's gauche!

I second that!!







Life.....is just a bowl of cherries....

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:02:08 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:04:44 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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Kcoursolle- I agree…the key is what I want, but I was just surprised that after seeing how happy I was with the ring, they felt it okay to comment on changes to it…already! And I am just more simple than most. Plus, I would just destroy those diamonds on the bottom  I am not really as gentle with my ring as I should be.

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:04:44 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:05:16 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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LadyLuLu-Thanks so much

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:05:16 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:07:49 PM
Stone Hunter
Stone Hunter

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Your ering is about you and your DF/DH.  It is for you to look at and enjoy.  If it is not to their style they should buy something else for themselves. 

Now if YOU wanted to you could get a diamond band and a plain band and have both of them blessed at your wedding.  If that's your style.  Then you'd have a band to wear alone and one to wear with your fab ering.

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:07:49 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:11:56 PM
Julian
Julian

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I love your ring!!!!

Maybe they're living vicariously through you.  My friend does the same thing.  She always thinks I should add big diamonds to my ring.  More more more!  I think being a simpler jewelry person (plain band), she thinks it's fun to see blingier things on me so she can try them on!  It's kind of like going shopping with your married & more practical sister (when you're single) and she urges you to get the sexier, vampier dress with sky high stilettos.  Ya know?  Living vicariously through a loved one!

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:11:56 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:14:10 PM
kcoursolle
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Date: 11/5/2006 8:04:44 PM
Author: UCLABelle
Kcoursolle- I agree…the key is what I want, but I was just surprised that after seeing how happy I was with the ring, they felt it okay to comment on changes to it…already! And I am just more simple than most. Plus, I would just destroy those diamonds on the bottom I am not really as gentle with my ring as I should be.

It's hard hearing people's comments sometimes, they don't really realize how they come off.  I have a .74 center stone and in LA it's a little small.  When I show it to people out here they say, "how cute" or "it's adorable"...meaning pretty...but small.  It's not polite of them, but I would try to not let it get to you.  Flashing your ring in front of the bathroom mirror helps me.  It looks big and sparkly and I get to see how it looks on me. 

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:14:10 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:15:22 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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Stone Hunter- You gave a GREAT idea...The plain band to wear with my e-ring and than an eternity ring for wear all by its self

Julian- They do try and live through me, at least my Aunt does...I think maybe she wouldn't if she had children, but she doesn't so I am the closest thing she has to a daughter...

KCoursolle- I lived in LA, and to be honest, I sometimes don't like those massive e-rings...But I understand, my Mom has a .80ct Marquise that was big compared to others where she originally lived in Northern California. Now that she lives in Orange County, she often gets the "cute" comments...where before she would get the "WOW THAT IS BEAUTIFUL AND HUGE"...Where one lives has a lot to do with the comments they get.

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:15:22 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:17:33 PM
Ellen
Ellen

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UC, I'm like you, simple taste. I was taught that sometimes, less is more.

I've seen your ring, please don't change a thing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It is also important for the State to inculcate in its subjects an aversion to any 'conspiracy theory of history' for a search for 'conspiracies' means a search for motives and an attribution of responsibility for historical misdeeds."

-Murray N. Rothbard, in The Anatomy of the State



John Swinton [1829-1901] Chief Editorial Writer of the New York Times (Considered "the Dean of his Profession" by his peers), when asked to toast an 'Independent Press' in a gathering at the National Press Club, circa 1880

"There is no such thing in America as an independent press unless it is in the country towns. You know it, and I know it. There is not one of you who dare express an honest opinion. If you express it you know beforehand that it would never appear in print. I am paid... for keeping my honest opinions out of the paper I am connected with. Others of you are paid similar salaries for doing similar things....

The business of the New York journalist is to distort the truth, to lie outright, to pervert, to vilify, to fawn at the feet of Mammon, and sell his country and race for his daily bread, or for what is about the same thing, his salary. You know this, and I know it and what foolery to be toasting an 'independent press.' We are tools, and the vassals of rich men behind the scenes. We are jumping-jacks. They pull the strings and we dance. Our time, our talents, our lives, our possibilities, all are the property of other men. We are intellectual prostitutes."

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:17:33 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:21:47 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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Ellen- Thanks for your comment. I love your ring too...very classic!!!

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:21:47 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:23:31 PM
Kaleigh
Kaleigh

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I love your ring, and think it's PERFECT as is!!!

____________________________
Piece of cake and a candle.
**ng gift**

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:23:31 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:27:20 PM
Ellen
Ellen

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Date: 11/5/2006 8:21:47 PM
Author: UCLABelle
Ellen- Thanks for your comment. I love your ring too...very classic!!!
Thanks!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It is also important for the State to inculcate in its subjects an aversion to any 'conspiracy theory of history' for a search for 'conspiracies' means a search for motives and an attribution of responsibility for historical misdeeds."

-Murray N. Rothbard, in The Anatomy of the State



John Swinton [1829-1901] Chief Editorial Writer of the New York Times (Considered "the Dean of his Profession" by his peers), when asked to toast an 'Independent Press' in a gathering at the National Press Club, circa 1880

"There is no such thing in America as an independent press unless it is in the country towns. You know it, and I know it. There is not one of you who dare express an honest opinion. If you express it you know beforehand that it would never appear in print. I am paid... for keeping my honest opinions out of the paper I am connected with. Others of you are paid similar salaries for doing similar things....

The business of the New York journalist is to distort the truth, to lie outright, to pervert, to vilify, to fawn at the feet of Mammon, and sell his country and race for his daily bread, or for what is about the same thing, his salary. You know this, and I know it and what foolery to be toasting an 'independent press.' We are tools, and the vassals of rich men behind the scenes. We are jumping-jacks. They pull the strings and we dance. Our time, our talents, our lives, our possibilities, all are the property of other men. We are intellectual prostitutes."

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:27:20 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:28:10 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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Thanks Kaleigh- You are always so nice...I hope you come to visit your daughter at Penn soon so you, Diamondfan and I (and other Philly gals) can get together!!! Does your daughter love jewelry as much as you?! If so, she could be my new friend at Penn, as all my friends at Penn are not into jewelry...which is a bummer!

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:28:10 PM
P: 11/5/2006 8:57:36 PM
diamondfan
diamondfan

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Belle, I would not be upset or surprised by the comments you get. I agree with the notion that if these people, love them though you do, are not in sync with your personal style...then just smile sweetly and change the subject. A friend of mine has a saying...which is a bit off color but basically states that everyone has an opinion just like they have something else...and the fact is, honestly, at a certain point you just have to nod or smile and forget it. You could, til the cows come home, hear all types of stuff and nonsense, and even some things that sound great, but enough is enough when you are happy. There are proportions that are correct for certain stones and I might just say that your jeweler, who is certified, chose these traps because they are the right size to showcase your center stone. See what they have to say then. They can disagree, they can think bigger is better, but that does not make it so.

What brought you to Philly? I hope we can all get a group together...those West Coast PS'ers should not have all the fun!

****************************
"There is no such thing as fun for the whole family-there are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry" Jerry Seinfeld

Posted:  11/5/2006 8:57:36 PM
P: 11/5/2006 9:00:31 PM
happygal
happygal

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Your ring is gorgeous in its simplicity and all that matters is if you love it =)

Posted:  11/5/2006 9:00:31 PM
P: 11/5/2006 9:19:09 PM
diamondfan
diamondfan

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ETA...I have had people make rude remarks about my ring and I am sort of used to it or not bothered by it anymore. You have a gorgeous ring, and that is all that matters!

****************************
"There is no such thing as fun for the whole family-there are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry" Jerry Seinfeld

Posted:  11/5/2006 9:19:09 PM
P: 11/5/2006 9:23:57 PM
UCLABelle
UCLABelle

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HappyGal-Thanks for the comments:)

DiamondFan- I am in Philly as a grad student at the University of Pennsylvania...I went to Columbia and got a Masters last year, so I was able to live in Manhattan! Despite liking Philly and NYC, I love the WestCoast and hope to come home in a year or two :)

Posted:  11/5/2006 9:23:57 PM
P: 11/5/2006 9:28:30 PM
diamondfan
diamondfan

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I was born and raised in Southern California so moving here was a shock to say the least but I really love it now. (It has been nine years). I hope we can plan a get together soon!

****************************
"There is no such thing as fun for the whole family-there are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry" Jerry Seinfeld

Posted:  11/5/2006 9:28:30 PM
P: 11/5/2006 10:10:59 PM
Kaleigh
Kaleigh

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Date: 11/5/2006 8:28:10 PM
Author: UCLABelle
Thanks Kaleigh- You are always so nice...I hope you come to visit your daughter at Penn soon so you, Diamondfan and I (and other Philly gals) can get together!!! Does your daughter love jewelry as much as you?! If so, she could be my new friend at Penn, as all my friends at Penn are not into jewelry...which is a bummer!
I am there a lot, and always think, how can I meet up with you!!!   She does love jewelry, makes a lot of her own stuff.  Think briolettes, faceted gem stone beads...  She is pretty creative.  She's loving Penn, working hard and playing hard.  I'd love to meet up with you, have to figure out how we can do that. Here's a small hint, we aren't Cope.  After the holidays, we should start  thread in Hangout and plan a GTG.

____________________________
Piece of cake and a candle.
**ng gift**

Posted:  11/5/2006 10:10:59 PM
P: 11/6/2006 12:07:16 AM
Gothgrrl
Gothgrrl

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I love your ring, just the way it is.  The side diamonds ACCENT the center stone.  It dosen't take away from it.  People are always going to say weird or rude things, I just don't listen to them.  I can relate though.  A couple of people have told me that I should have gone bigger.  That they would not settle for less that 2 carats.  Well...I've been happily married for almost 10 years.  Yes my ring isn't huge.  Yes it is kinda simple.  And you know something?  They are all still single.

It comes down to what you and your fiance likes.  Plain and simple.  Try not to let them make you feel bad or second guess your ring.  Next time just smile and tell them that your ring is PERFECT!





...groovy...
..this is my boomstick..
..gimme some sugar, baby..

Posted:  11/6/2006 12:07:16 AM
P: 11/6/2006 2:52:44 AM
reader
reader

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Perhaps their sense of style is just a bit dated, thats all...

One time, I noticed a younger woman's flash from her engagement ring from across her yard...and when she came over to get her mail, I told her how much I loved the cut of her stone. She had a huge grin and was nearly in tears. She had just gotten engaged that week, and so far, the only other person to like her ring, was her mom. ALL of her friends commented that the setting was 'too modern and plain" Princess cut, too 'severe' stone 'too small'

I mentioned her friends were 'too immature' 'too jealous' and 'wouldn't know quality since they shop at the maul' . It made her day.

Posted:  11/6/2006 2:52:44 AM
P: 11/6/2006 4:17:51 AM
Lorelei
Lorelei

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Date: 11/5/2006 7:27:44 PM
Author: decodelighted
Puhleeze. Your ring is SHEER PERFECTION. Minimalist MAJESTY! Chic on a Stick!

Lemmie ask you this ... your Aunt ... your 'other family member' ... would you take their advice about haircuts or sofas or cars. Do you admire their personal style, their every outfit, thier taste in purses or cocktails or men?

I'm guessing they fall short on one count or other in your eyes.

We all have different styles. Personally, I don't think your Asscher could be any lovelier unless it was in MY possesion! Don't let anyone bully you into unnecessary bling that will distract from what you KNOW is the star ... that ASSCHER!

I doubt Coco Chanel was cramming bling onto her bands. Her philosophy was put you accessories on and then take one thing back OFF.

Overdone ... now that's gauche!

I agree your ring is perfection!  More or less diamonds is a personal preference and it seems the more mature ladies seem to range themselves on the More Team!  Deco is also right that Coco Chanel said in other words that less is more - " never add but strip away."  Case in point is the #5 bottle.  Unlike the fussy, flowery perfume bottles of the era when #5 was created, Coco chose the plain classic bottle - her reasoning was that the fragrance itself was far more significant than the bottle it was in.  Now of course, the bottle is as recognizable as the #5 name itself!  Back to your ring, it is definitely chic on a stick!









Nothing is more sacred as the bond between horse and rider...no other creature can ever become so emotionally close to a human as a horse. When a horse dies, the memory lives on because an enormous part of his owner's heart, soul, very existence dies also...but that can never be laid to rest, it is not meant to be...
- Stephanie M Thorn

Posted:  11/6/2006 4:17:51 AM
P: 11/6/2006 7:56:04 AM
Madam Bijoux
Madam Bijoux

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As Rick Nelson once said in a song,

"You can't please everyone, so you have to please yourself".

Enjoy your ring as it is and don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

"I never met a diamond I didn't like."
No jewel is as beautiful as a cat's eyes.
Madam Bijoux (Gabrielle)

Posted:  11/6/2006 7:56:04 AM
P: 11/6/2006 1:11:07 PM
onedrop
onedrop

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I say simply this....don't change a thing!!!

"Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching." ~ Satchel Paige

Posted:  11/6/2006 1:11:07 PM
P: 11/6/2006 1:30:17 PM
sistagrl2004
sistagrl2004

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Date: 11/5/2006 7:10:48 PM
Author:UCLABelle
So, I have this, what I think is perfect, asscher (or square emerald cut) diamond with two traps on the side. I posted some pics (although not very good ones) in the SMTR forum.

My Aunt and another close friend mentioned to me that the traps need to be bigger and that I should add more diamonds to the ring. I guess I can understand the bigger traps, but their reasoning was 'more diamonds and bigger diamonds the better'...They also instructed me to get diamond wedding bands for the ring, after I said I would prefer a plain platinum band.

Now, I am a very plain person. I don't wear jewelry (but I just LOVE it!)...so to me my 1.92 Asscher and .40cttw traps are perfect. The traps are not too big that they take away from the diamond, nor too small that you can't see them or enjoy their cut.

However, their comments made me wonder...have any of you faced similar comments?


There's no accounting for taste! I am TOTALLY a "more bling" kinda girl-definaitely not the "less is more" type,  but I LOVE your ring AS IS and would leave it alone. For ME, I probably would look for a tiny emerald cut/baguette band, but I thikn your ring would be just as gorgeous with a plain band. I DEFINATELY would not add bigger side stones. I mean damn, save some bling for the right hand, the neck, the wrist, the ears

Posted:  11/6/2006 1:30:17 PM
P: 11/6/2006 8:30:33 PM
Suteishi
Suteishi

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Your ring is gorgeous. I wouldn't change a thing if you love it!

Maybe your Mom and Aunt are just a teensy bit envious? XD

Jewelry can make people kinda kooky.

A few years ago one of my Mom's best friends (who is a bit nutty) fell in love with an emerald ring I have. The whole thing was so strange. She would ask to try it on when she saw me. Asked me endless questions of how much it cost, and at one point I think she was hinting how she'd like to buy it from me!

No way would I sell it!

Her (also nutty husband) bought her for their anniversary an insanely huge emerald from Tiffany's. It was beautiful (and eyeball big) and thousands and thousands of dollars more than mine.

She still asked to try mine on when she next saw me.

Enjoy your lovely ring. XDD

Posted:  11/6/2006 8:30:33 PM

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