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 I can't wait anymore

P:  4/7/2009 11:38:18 PM  
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Fiance has proposed with a diamond ring.  0.40 ct round diamond good cut.  The setting is too big for the diamond.  He didn't bought it at a jeweler either.  He told me that this is only a temporary ring as he want to save enough to buy me a 1 ct diamond. 

I like the diamond, it sparkles so much, but I don't like the setting, it is too big for that diamond size.  

I just don't think I can wait anymore.  I already wait since last year and he still haven't save enough.  Am I being mean?  I think for now I'll be happy with a 0.50 ct diamond.  I just want a ring and the ability to show people that I have engaged. 
Posted:  4/7/2009 11:38:18 PM

 There are 41 replies to this message.  There are 30 replies on this page.

P: 4/7/2009 11:41:44 PM
somegirl932
somegirl932

Cut Rock
Total Posts: 311
Last Post: 8/24/2009
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on the plus side, he proposed! is there any way to get a cheap temp setting for the diamond you have while he's saving? you said the diamond was nice and sparkly. maybe this would be the easiest temporary solution?

he obviously wants to be with you (he proposed!). i don't know your situation, but maybe the economy is partly to blame? obviously he is trying...

Posted:  4/7/2009 11:41:44 PM
P: 4/8/2009 2:09:28 AM
choro72
choro72

Ideal Rock
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Date: 4/7/2009 11:38:18 PM
Author:noneek
Fiance has proposed with a diamond ring. 0.40 ct round diamond good cut. The setting is too big for the diamond. He didn't bought it at a jeweler either. He told me that this is only a temporary ring as he want to save enough to buy me a 1 ct diamond.

I like the diamond, it sparkles so much, but I don't like the setting, it is too big for that diamond size.

I just don't think I can wait anymore. I already wait since last year and he still haven't save enough. Am I being mean? I think for now I'll be happy with a 0.50 ct diamond. I just want a ring and the ability to show people that I have engaged.

I don't understand why you don't have the ability to show people that you're engaged. Didn't the fact that he proposed take care of that?

Posted:  4/8/2009 2:09:28 AM
P: 4/8/2009 2:53:08 AM
caribqueen
caribqueen

Cut Rock
Total Posts: 183
Last Post: 11/17/2009
Member Since: 12/23/2008
 
Sounds like the only way to try to get what you want is to open up to your fiance. Saving up for a 1 carat diamond could take quite a while for some people, but only you or your fiance know how far down the line that may be for you guys. If you're fairly happy with what you have why don't you talk to your fiance about putting off the 1 carat for now (temporarily) and ask him if he would mind if you guys chose a setting together that better suited the diamond you already have?



*****You can call me Mrs. B on 6/5/2010*****

Posted:  4/8/2009 2:53:08 AM
P: 4/8/2009 3:48:33 AM
LaraOnline
LaraOnline

Ideal Rock
Total Posts: 2,039
Last Post: 9/1/2009
Member Since: 2/25/2008
 
I didn't realise you needed a carat diamond to get engaged.
Why worry?
Get the setting sorted, wear your .4carat with pride, and upgrade, if you can, on your fifth wedding anni!
I did!


ETA: PS my stone was about one quarter the size of your .4, if that makes you feel better. Not that anyone ever made me feel bad or dumb about that ring, either btw! In fact I got compliments on it. I still wear it, and still love it.

And then a plank in reason broke... Emily Dickinson

Posted:  4/8/2009 3:48:33 AM
P: 4/8/2009 10:30:06 AM
tlh
tlh

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my .2 being engaged isn't about the ring its about planning a future as man and wife.  Get a new setting.. keep the original for the 1ct upgrade.  Put your .4ct in the new setting.  Wear it.  Get the ooo's and ahhh's.  If you are trading your .4 diamond in for the 1ct - then just get a gemstone in the "new temp" setting and wear that as a Right hand ring.

Best wishes.

"I like smiling. Smiling's my favorite!" Will Ferrell ~ Elf

Posted:  4/8/2009 10:30:06 AM
P: 4/8/2009 10:45:47 AM
mscushion
mscushion

Ideal Rock
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I agree with all the ladies. Just get a cheap temporary solitaire setting and wear the .4 with pride. Your FI is clearly working towards upgrading you to a larger size, so what's the rush?

Posted:  4/8/2009 10:45:47 AM
P: 4/8/2009 10:49:35 AM
girlie-girl
girlie-girl

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To be honest, I'm not exactly sure what you mean when you say the setting is "too big" for the diamond. 

Having said that, are you able to take the ring to a jeweler to see if it can be adjusted for that size diamond?  Maybe there is something they can do that wouldn't be too expensive. 

Posted:  4/8/2009 10:49:35 AM
P: 4/8/2009 3:12:33 PM
Winks_Elf
Winks_Elf

Ideal Rock
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Last Post: 11/23/2009
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Date: 4/7/2009 11:38:18 PM
Author:noneek
Fiance has proposed with a diamond ring. 0.40 ct round diamond good cut. The setting is too big for the diamond. He didn't bought it at a jeweler either. He told me that this is only a temporary ring as he want to save enough to buy me a 1 ct diamond.


I like the diamond, it sparkles so much, but I don't like the setting, it is too big for that diamond size.


I just don't think I can wait anymore. I already wait since last year and he still haven't save enough. Am I being mean? I think for now I'll be happy with a 0.50 ct diamond. I just want a ring and the ability to show people that I have engaged.






He proposed with a ring, so yes you are being mean (unless he's making a ton of money and spending it all on himself instead of working towards paying for the wedding or a home for the two of you.) A half carat is only .10 carat larger than what you already have. I would take a look at the Stuller settings with miracle heads that make the diamond look larger. Perhaps that will make it look better to you.


Girlie, some settings can really overwhelm a small center stone, like those with a really wide shank, or lots of side stones going on that may wind up being close to the size of the center stone.

Melissa

-

Learning is a lifelong process of obtaining and sharing knowledge.

Posted:  4/8/2009 3:12:33 PM
P: 4/8/2009 3:24:22 PM
lucyandroger
lucyandroger

Ideal Rock
Total Posts: 889
Last Post: 11/23/2009
Member Since: 12/12/2008
 
Hi Noneek,

I understand what you're saying about the setting not really fitting the diamond.  What I would do is play up to your FI how much you love your diamond and how you just want a setting that makes it look its best.  Then once you reset your stone, maybe you won't even feel like you need an upgrade in size.

Good luck!

P.S. - Can you post a pic of your ring?  The ladies here are great with suggesting settings.



*** "At this point, going to law school is like starting to smoke. It’s expensive, it’s probably going to kill you, and it’s a stupid life decision. But some people just don’t care." ATL ***

Posted:  4/8/2009 3:24:22 PM
P: 4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
littlemissbliss
littlemissbliss

Cut Rock
Total Posts: 154
Last Post: 8/16/2009
Member Since: 4/22/2008
 
noneek: please take a moment and look at this thread:

Jonah's ring

Jonah bought his FI a .45 diamond and put it in a fab setting and IT IS STUNNING. Be proud of your diamond, as it is from a man that gave it to you with
LOVE

Diamonds are beautiful, no matter their size. Enjoy it! And please come back with pictures -- we love pictures!

Posted:  4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
P: 4/8/2009 4:58:28 PM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/8/2009 3:12:33 PM
Author: Winks_Elf

Date: 4/7/2009 11:38:18 PM
Author:noneek
Fiance has proposed with a diamond ring. 0.40 ct round diamond good cut. The setting is too big for the diamond. He didn't bought it at a jeweler either. He told me that this is only a temporary ring as he want to save enough to buy me a 1 ct diamond.


I like the diamond, it sparkles so much, but I don't like the setting, it is too big for that diamond size.


I just don't think I can wait anymore. I already wait since last year and he still haven't save enough. Am I being mean? I think for now I'll be happy with a 0.50 ct diamond. I just want a ring and the ability to show people that I have engaged.






He proposed with a ring, so yes you are being mean (unless he's making a ton of money and spending it all on himself instead of working towards paying for the wedding or a home for the two of you.) A half carat is only .10 carat larger than what you already have. I would take a look at the Stuller settings with miracle heads that make the diamond look larger. Perhaps that will make it look better to you.


Girlie, some settings can really overwhelm a small center stone, like those with a really wide shank, or lots of side stones going on that may wind up being close to the size of the center stone.


Yes, you're right, I am being mean.  I am ashamed of myself actually for wanting more.  But I do have reasons.

The setting really doesn't play to the potential of the stone.  There is nothing wrong with the stone, it sparkles beautifully.  Inspite of its J color and I2/I3 clarity, it doesn't look like a yucky yellow. 

We took pictures of it last nite.

Posted:  4/8/2009 4:58:28 PM
P: 4/8/2009 5:00:32 PM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/8/2009 3:24:22 PM
Author: lucyandroger
Hi Noneek,

I understand what you're saying about the setting not really fitting the diamond. What I would do is play up to your FI how much you love your diamond and how you just want a setting that makes it look its best. Then once you reset your stone, maybe you won't even feel like you need an upgrade in size.

Good luck!

P.S. - Can you post a pic of your ring? The ladies here are great with suggesting settings.

We took pics of it last nite.  I will post it tonite.

Posted:  4/8/2009 5:00:32 PM
P: 4/8/2009 8:10:49 PM
Namaste
Namaste

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Date: 4/8/2009 10:49:35 AM
Author: girlie-girl
To be honest, I'm not exactly sure what you mean when you say the setting is 'too big' for the diamond.


Having said that, are you able to take the ring to a jeweler to see if it can be adjusted for that size diamond? Maybe there is something they can do that wouldn't be too expensive.




I'm not clear on what you mean either..

are you saying that he proposed with just a .4 ct loose stone.. and purchased a setting that is made for a 1 ct diamond? so you have nothing to set the .4 stone in?

well, either way if you're looking for settings heres some suggestions!
a couple ladies on this site have the WF Petite open cathedral with center stones about the size of yours.. if you do a search you can probably find pics.. but heres the link to the WF site.. http://www.whiteflash.com/Engagement-Rings/Styles/Diamond-Settings/-Petite-Open-Cathedral--Engagement-Ring_1211.htm

Another option would be this http://www.whiteflash.com/Engagement-Rings/Styles/Diamond-Settings/Tapered-Diamond-Engagement-Ring_1271.htm - the tapered band would definitely make your stone POP!!

good luck.. can't wait to see pics!

Posted:  4/8/2009 8:10:49 PM
P: 4/8/2009 8:37:10 PM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Sorry, I wasn't clear on what I mean.  So pls let me explain myself.  I hope now is clear.

FI proposed with a diamond ring.  0.40 ct placed on a shank setting (I believe this is what its called).  I find the setting is not feminine at all.  Thats the problem.  The diamond itself is gorgeous.  Its J color and I2/I3 clarity (yet eye clean).  It sparkles a lot and its not yellow at all, unless you compare it with an F color diamond.  I have an F color diamond earrings and the color diff showed.  Its more like a warm white.

Anyway, I have no problem at all with a 0.40 ct.  My problem is the setting.  Before I even express this concern, he said that it is only a temp ring (to show our family that our relationship has go up a level).  He said he is working on getting a 1 ct stone.  He said that I shouldn't go to work with that ring and that I should wait until early next year to announce our engagement to people at work.  He said that he doesn't feel comfortable for me to go to work with the diamond that size as ppl will think that he is being cheap.

I plan to take the ring to a jewelry store and set the ring into another setting and let him see what I mean.  I am so affraid to hurt his heart if I were to open this subject again.  It is my english, I'm affraid, things seems to be lost in translation.


Posted:  4/8/2009 8:37:10 PM
P: 4/8/2009 8:38:36 PM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
Author: littlemissbliss
noneek: please take a moment and look at this thread:

Jonah's ring

Jonah bought his FI a .45 diamond and put it in a fab setting and IT IS STUNNING. Be proud of your diamond, as it is from a man that gave it to you with
LOVE

Diamonds are beautiful, no matter their size. Enjoy it! And please come back with pictures -- we love pictures!

This setting is stunning.  I will take it into consideration.  Thanks so much for attaching the post!!!

Posted:  4/8/2009 8:38:36 PM
P: 4/8/2009 10:41:44 PM
swingirl
swingirl

Ideal Rock
Total Posts: 3,283
Last Post: 11/22/2009
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There is nothing to be embarrassed about with a 0.4ct stone. I don't know where you are located but in the US the average size is .5ct or less. Yes, many women have larger stone especially in urban areas but your pretty stone in a setting that showed it off would be very respectable. You shouldn't have to wait to announce your engagement.

Posted:  4/8/2009 10:41:44 PM
P: 4/9/2009 12:24:39 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Thank you all for your candor response.  I have a good talk with my FI and he agreed to change the setting.  Thank you for posting the previous pictures of Jonah's fiance who has a 0.45 ct.  The picture convinced him that the stone will look better with a slimmer setting and he agreed to get another setting asap.    I am so happy.  He is too actually because he won't have to start from zero.  He totally misunderstand me, he thought I want a 1 ct stone which I don't.  In fact, I'll be more than happy without the stone at all.  From where I come from, people don't wear diamond for engagement ring.  In fact, there is no engagement ring at all, only wedding ring.

Posting my worries here really helps open my mind on what the problem really is.  Thanks ladies!!!

Posted:  4/9/2009 12:24:39 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:03:15 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Not sure if this is going to work.  But here it is.
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:03:15 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:13:08 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Here is another one.
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:13:08 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:21:26 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Another one. 
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:21:26 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:25:32 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
I got one more.
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:25:32 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:28:18 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Really start to enjoy posting pictures.
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:28:18 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:33:13 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Don't you think the width of the band is bigger than the diamond?  To me, it feels like the stone screams out "I can do better!!!".  Am I nuts or what?  Pls don't say I'm nuts, I'm actually very sensitive.
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:33:13 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:39:27 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
Author: littlemissbliss
noneek: please take a moment and look at this thread:

Jonah's ring

Jonah bought his FI a .45 diamond and put it in a fab setting and IT IS STUNNING. Be proud of your diamond, as it is from a man that gave it to you with
LOVE

Diamonds are beautiful, no matter their size. Enjoy it! And please come back with pictures -- we love pictures!

Little Miss Bliss: Thank you for posting.  Your post results in me showing to my FI and that picture close the deal. 

Does anyone know how much is this Jeff Cooper's setting costs?

Thanks!
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:39:27 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:44:57 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
This one shows unbalance in the setting. 
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:44:57 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:48:07 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/9/2009 1:39:27 AM
Author: noneek

Date: 4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
Author: littlemissbliss
noneek: please take a moment and look at this thread:

Jonah's ring

Jonah bought his FI a .45 diamond and put it in a fab setting and IT IS STUNNING. Be proud of your diamond, as it is from a man that gave it to you with
LOVE

Diamonds are beautiful, no matter their size. Enjoy it! And please come back with pictures -- we love pictures!

Little Miss Bliss: Thank you for posting. Your post results in me showing to my FI and that picture close the deal.

Does anyone know how much is this Jeff Cooper's setting costs?

Thanks!

Sorry, the pic didn't work in previous posts.  Here is the setting I am interested in. 
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:48:07 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:53:33 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Date: 4/9/2009 1:39:27 AM
Author: noneek

Date: 4/8/2009 3:35:39 PM
Author: littlemissbliss
noneek: please take a moment and look at this thread:

Jonah's ring

Jonah bought his FI a .45 diamond and put it in a fab setting and IT IS STUNNING. Be proud of your diamond, as it is from a man that gave it to you with
LOVE

Diamonds are beautiful, no matter their size. Enjoy it! And please come back with pictures -- we love pictures!

Little Miss Bliss: Thank you for posting. Your post results in me showing to my FI and that picture close the deal.

Does anyone know how much is this Jeff Cooper's setting costs?

Thanks!

Sorry, the pic didn't work in previous posts.  Here is the setting I am interested in. 
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:53:33 AM
P: 4/9/2009 1:54:42 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Sorry, the picture on the jeff cooper setting doesn't work.  Never mind, ladies.  Good nite!!!

Posted:  4/9/2009 1:54:42 AM
P: 4/9/2009 2:16:28 AM
noneek
noneek

Rough Rock
Total Posts: 92
Last Post: 4/28/2009
Member Since: 3/8/2009
 
Ok.  Maybe one more picture before I go to sleep.  Good nite! 
 

 

Posted:  4/9/2009 2:16:28 AM
P: 4/9/2009 2:25:31 AM
VRBeauty
VRBeauty

Ideal Rock
Total Posts: 2,601
Last Post: 11/22/2009
Member Since: 4/3/2006
 
Noneek, I'm glad you and your fiance reached an agreement! I noticed right away that you stone was set off-center and really, that would bug the heck out of me. I'd also be concerned about the overall workmanship if the jeweler was willing to let a ring leave the showroom with such an obvious defect (I assume that wasn't intentional )!

I hope you have fun finding a new setting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
VRBeauty

Thursday is the new Friday.

Posted:  4/9/2009 2:25:31 AM

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