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 wedding bands

P:  3/15/2009 3:32:54 PM  
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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Hi all! smurfy again :)
So fi and i have been talking and what we have decided is to get regular wedding bands to do the ring exchange at the ceremony and everything...but then after the wedding we are going to have the rings encased in a clear display box to put by our wedding photo and album. We are planning to get the tattooed rings (it is only on the top half of your finger) because we feel like this is more meaningful to us because they will be there FOREVER. also this way we do not have to find a special band to curve around my e-ring, i can just wear the ering on top of the tattoo. we are looking at simple greek or celtic designs, nothing big and bulky or crazily ugly lol

i know people say oh but its there forever! and im like well thats what a marriage is. i know there will be naysayers but this is what we feel is right for us :)

just thought i would share.
"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!
Posted:  3/15/2009 3:32:54 PM

 There are 42 replies to this message.  There are 30 replies on this page.

P: 3/15/2009 6:41:13 PM
mintve
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very cool.  be sure to post pics :)

Everything Works Out for a Reason

Posted:  3/15/2009 6:41:13 PM
P: 3/15/2009 8:01:52 PM
CellarDoor
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Isn't the point of the wedding ring the whole 'ring symbolizes eternity' thing?  I just think that having a tattoo that is only on the top half of your finger kind of is in direct conflict with that.  Are you or your fiance Celtic and/or Greek, is that why you are thinking about getting a Celtic or Greek tattoo, or is it just that you aesthetically like them but not that they have any personal significance?  I would think long and hard before getting a tattoo.  You will never regret not getting a tattoo.  Trust me, I know.  I got a trendy Chinese symbol tattooed on my stomach on spring break ten years ago, and I hate the thing.

Posted:  3/15/2009 8:01:52 PM
P: 3/15/2009 9:02:20 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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the reason they do not do the whole ring is because with time the bottom of the finger will rub on stuff and the ink will wear out. we are doing wedding rings but we just are afraid we'll lose them and fi doesn't like wearing rings anyways which is why he suggested this. personally i like the idea of getting a tattoo like this to symbolize our commitment and fidelity to each other. if we aren't comfortable with the idea of getting permanent wedding rings, then i guess i don't believe we should be getting married in the first place. but we are comfortable with it and it is something we want to do.

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/15/2009 9:02:20 PM
P: 3/15/2009 9:04:10 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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oh also the reason we like the greek design is that fi studied in greece in school for a very long time, he has some greek in his blood but i do not, i do have irish which is why we considered a gaelic design. at one point in our lives we are seriously considering moving to greece or ireland, so i think thats enough symbolism, represents some of the dreams we have together as well as our commitment to each other.

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/15/2009 9:04:10 PM
P: 3/15/2009 9:15:58 PM
swimmer
swimmer

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Very trendy!
You could also get your names done like Levi had Bristol done on his ring finger; Tommy Lee and Pamela did the same. Not sure what Angelina and Billy Bob, or Nick Carter and Paris Hilton got done. Off to google!

ETA: I was sooooo wrong about Tommy, you do NOT want to know where his "pamela" tat is. NYTimes bit about a man who did get a wedding band tat link

Posted:  3/15/2009 9:15:58 PM
P: 3/15/2009 9:21:01 PM
BeachRunner
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While the traditional wedding ring does symbolize eternity, etc. I feel that you and your FI should decide on something that is meaningful to you. If a tattoo on your finger symbolizing love, trust, eternal marriage, then so be it! I understand your concerns about the tattoo showing wear, but there is also retouching.

ETA: CellarDoor I fell victim to the crappy Chinese symbol myself, and I hate mine as well. I love tattoos, and want more, I just don't like the silly Chinese symbol.








Posted:  3/15/2009 9:21:01 PM
P: 3/15/2009 9:47:41 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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no you guys, when people request wedding band tattoos they simply wont do it period at any tattoo place weve seen just because it wears down after like a year and a half. ive seen the ones with the names but i think we would like it to look somewhat like a real ring just so people arent confused about whats on our fingers :)

we are doing the regular rings for the ceremony and then having them put in a clear box to display them with all of our wedding things :)

and definitely not doing it to be trendy lol

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/15/2009 9:47:41 PM
P: 3/16/2009 12:51:34 AM
AnthroMoon
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Date: 3/15/2009 9:47:41 PM
Author: Smurfysmiles


we are doing the regular rings for the ceremony and then having them put in a clear box to display them with all of our wedding things :)


What's the point in that? Just more stuff to dust during cleaning.

Posted:  3/16/2009 12:51:34 AM
P: 3/16/2009 1:04:31 AM
newsboysgrl777
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Date: 3/16/2009 12:51:34 AM
Author: AnthroMoon

Date: 3/15/2009 9:47:41 PM
Author: Smurfysmiles


we are doing the regular rings for the ceremony and then having them put in a clear box to display them with all of our wedding things :)


What's the point in that? Just more stuff to dust during cleaning.

That's just like asking what's the point of having anything sentimental in your house? It's exactly for that - sentimentality. There are some people who like to keep their bouquet, their unity candle/sand vessel, etc and it's all just for remembrance's sake. You might as well ask why anyone would hang a photo on their wall - you have to dust that, too, you know?!

I think this is something that sounds like it will work for the two of you and if that's the case, then totally ignore anyone who thinks differently. I'd just make sure I did a lot of research to decide on the design I wanted. And, I'm curious - how will you get your e-ring to sit above the tattooed ring? Unless you tatooed your knuckle, right? Or am I wrong?

Posted:  3/16/2009 1:04:31 AM
P: 3/16/2009 1:43:27 AM
FrekeChild
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I think you should think about this a lot and research it as well. Tattoos on the hands are different from anywhere else on the skin because even on the back of your hand and not on the palm the texture is different. The ink tends to spread out instead of staying "clean". So even if you want a design, it could end up looking like a thick black line anyway. There are a few PSers who have gotten finger tattoos and now, years after the fact they buy rings to try to cover them up. LittleGreyKitten comes to mind immediately. ETA: Link with a pic and her talking about it

_______________________________ "Women are either goddesses or doormats." Pablo Picasso "In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane." Mark Twain

Posted:  3/16/2009 1:43:27 AM
P: 3/16/2009 1:56:24 AM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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thanks for the link freke :)
we are planning to have them mark where my e-ring sits and have them do it slightly above. we do have lots of time to think about it though, we probably wouldn't be getting it done until december or january :)

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 1:56:24 AM
P: 3/16/2009 3:53:11 AM
trillionaire
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I'm not superstitious, but everyone, literally everyone whom I've ever met that has wedding tats has gotten divorced.  Every single one. 

I know that is anecdotal, and not representative, but some things I just don't mess with... divorce being one.




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Posted:  3/16/2009 3:53:11 AM
P: 3/16/2009 10:20:34 AM
AnthroMoon
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Date: 3/16/2009 1:04:31 AM
Author: newsboysgrl777
Date: 3/16/2009 12:51:34 AM

Author: AnthroMoon


Date: 3/15/2009 9:47:41 PM

Author: Smurfysmiles



we are doing the regular rings for the ceremony and then having them put in a clear box to display them with all of our wedding things :)




What's the point in that? Just more stuff to dust during cleaning.


That's just like asking what's the point of having anything sentimental in your house? It's exactly for that - sentimentality. There are some people who like to keep their bouquet, their unity candle/sand vessel, etc and it's all just for remembrance's sake. You might as well ask why anyone would hang a photo on their wall - you have to dust that, too, you know?!


I think this is something that sounds like it will work for the two of you and if that's the case, then totally ignore anyone who thinks differently. I'd just make sure I did a lot of research to decide on the design I wanted. And, I'm curious - how will you get your e-ring to sit above the tattooed ring? Unless you tatooed your knuckle, right? Or am I wrong?


My bad, perhaps I should have been more clear in order to avoid a response such as this.

If she plans to get a tattoo ring to represent her real wedding band, what is the point in wasting money on pieces of jewelry only for them to be encased in a box? The other items you brought up had other purposes during the wedding prior to people saving them for a keepsake. I guess I don't see wedding bands as a keepsake. But hey, maybe she's planning to buy some cheap $20 bands just to go through the motions on the day of and she wants to save them for sentimental reasons. I can go with that. But if she plans to buy real (i.e. pricey) bands, I think it's a complete waste of money. Granted, once the tattoo starts looking yukie down the road, at least she can run to those little cases and throw the real band on her finger to hide it.

Posted:  3/16/2009 10:20:34 AM
P: 3/16/2009 10:31:51 AM
House Cat
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Well, I think it's a fine idea!

But, it can't be too detailed because detail in a tattoo tends to bleed over time and it will turn into a blob on something that small.  So, be sure to find a really reputable tattoo shop with an incredible artist who can give you a really honest opinion of what can be done and be sure to ask about how it will look in the long term.  Think old wrinkly hands or old men and how their tattoos look on their arms now!  yeah..not pretty.

I have a few tattoos that were really beautiful in the beginning, but the ones that have been in the sun for the past 10 years have definitely faded.  Your hands will be in the sun constantly, so they will see wear and tear.

I don't know where you're located, but go to the nearest big city for your tattoo, with a custom artist! 


I love it when people are willing to express their individuality!  Just be sure you will always love it...although, if you don't, there are nice thing wedding bands that will cover it beautifully, I'm sure!



If you're going through hell, keep going. -Winston Churchill

Posted:  3/16/2009 10:31:51 AM
P: 3/16/2009 10:33:15 AM
luvthemstrawberries
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What a cool idea Smurfy!

You know, I don't think the bottom would wear out - well, I know nothing about tattoos, but where rings sit on your finger, I don't think that area would get rubbed too much, because your palm and knuckle kind of take the direct contact there.  Just a thought about getting full circles.




Posted:  3/16/2009 10:33:15 AM
P: 3/16/2009 3:01:33 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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I really wish I could get the whole circle lts but its hard to find an artist who will actually do that

As for getting the bands, we want nice ones because they are from our wedding day. Lots of girls spend tons of money on all sorts of things that will only be used or worn once on their wedding day...why cant wedding rings be part of that? also if we do decide not to go ahead with it (and it's possible we might not go ahead with it after a couple months of thought) i would like to have nice rings to wear, ya know?

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 3:01:33 PM
P: 3/16/2009 3:15:30 PM
Italiahaircolor
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Have you thought about the possible career ramifications that this might have?

I know your wedding bands being tattooed on will be meaningful to you both--but, a lot of employers will be disgusted by that.  Seriously, they may not want someone representing their company or meeting with clients with black inked lines on their fingers.  Now, you might have a desk job...but appearance still goes along way to getting you behind that desk to begin with...

Also, finger tat's wear very very poorly.  The hands shed skin frequently and the skin doesn't hold pigment as well there as other places.  You should consider getting matching tattoos elsewhere that will last longer. 

My husband and I have each others inital tattooed...they certainly aren't on our fingers...but there are they, and they are meaningful...but they can be covered when need be.  My point is, just because they aren't on the left hand, on the ring doesn't make them less meaningful...only more practical.

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Posted:  3/16/2009 3:15:30 PM
P: 3/16/2009 3:18:33 PM
Dreamgirl
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Hmm. I've seen this done before. Not quite sure what I think of it. But to each his own...

I sort of agree with Italia, however. Ultimately, the two of you will do what's best for yourselves though!

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Posted:  3/16/2009 3:18:33 PM
P: 3/16/2009 3:20:55 PM
violet02
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Ditto to Freke and Italia regarding the wear and tear of a tattoo on your hands. Take a look at some celebrity tattoo'ed ring finger photos, yikes. They will turn into a blob after time, its inevitable.

Also tattoo'ed hands and career ramifications are a consideration that should be thought out.

Other than that, I'm never one to criticize someone's choice to get a tattoo, it's totally up to you. Just food for thought before you do it. The best part about waiting awhile to get one is that you have plenty of time to think it through.

Posted:  3/16/2009 3:20:55 PM
P: 3/16/2009 3:30:02 PM
TheBigT
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I, too, wonder about what potential employers will think when they see your respective tattooed hands. During interviews people form quick opinions - and a lot of people don't like tattoos, or they make judgments about those who have them. You may feel that you don't want to work for someone who doesn't care for tattooed people, in which case you'll be able to weed them out more easily. But you may not want to limit your job prospects in this way.

Just a thought!

Posted:  3/16/2009 3:30:02 PM
P: 3/16/2009 4:46:40 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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Well we know fi's job accepts tattoos because that is kind of where he got the idea, a coworker of his has his wedding ring tattooed on and it looks fantastic and hes had it for 5 years now. as for me if a job doesnt allow it fine, then ill freelance until i do find a job that allows it and also my e-ring will be on the same finger so were not too concerned about that. ive thought about getting a different kind too like italia mentioned but i havent thought of anything that is quite as meaningful as the ring yet..

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 4:46:40 PM
P: 3/16/2009 4:54:55 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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littlegreykittens is much much larger than anything we were considering, here is a picture to show you the general idea of what we are thinking about :)

 

 

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 4:54:55 PM
P: 3/16/2009 4:59:31 PM
MaggieB
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Date: 3/16/2009 4:46:40 PM
Author: Smurfysmiles
Well we know fi's job accepts tattoos because that is kind of where he got the idea, a coworker of his has his wedding ring tattooed on and it looks fantastic and hes had it for 5 years now. as for me if a job doesnt allow it fine, then ill freelance until i do find a job that allows it and also my e-ring will be on the same finger so were not too concerned about that. ive thought about getting a different kind too like italia mentioned but i havent thought of anything that is quite as meaningful as the ring yet..

I honestly think you should do what makes you happy, but just for clarification, it's not about whether or not a company accepts tattoos.  It's about getting past the HR rep that interviews you.  When you do anything that employers have opinions about - piercings, tattoos, pink hair, whatever - you are making a choice that could affect your employment.  Lots of people choose to do so anyway.

Posted:  3/16/2009 4:59:31 PM
P: 3/16/2009 5:11:21 PM
lucyandroger
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Date: 3/16/2009 4:59:31 PM
Author: MaggieB

Date: 3/16/2009 4:46:40 PM
Author: Smurfysmiles
Well we know fi's job accepts tattoos because that is kind of where he got the idea, a coworker of his has his wedding ring tattooed on and it looks fantastic and hes had it for 5 years now. as for me if a job doesnt allow it fine, then ill freelance until i do find a job that allows it and also my e-ring will be on the same finger so were not too concerned about that. ive thought about getting a different kind too like italia mentioned but i havent thought of anything that is quite as meaningful as the ring yet..

I honestly think you should do what makes you happy, but just for clarification, it's not about whether or not a company accepts tattoos. It's about getting past the HR rep that interviews you. When you do anything that employers have opinions about - piercings, tattoos, pink hair, whatever - you are making a choice that could affect your employment. Lots of people choose to do so anyway.

Smurfysmiles, you could always wear a big thick band to cover up the tatto when you go on interviews...

I think it is a cool idea if that is your style and you have really thought it through.  My suggestion would be to draw one on yourself for a day and see how you like it.  See if you actually like the tattoo look with your ering.



*** "At this point, going to law school is like starting to smoke. It’s expensive, it’s probably going to kill you, and it’s a stupid life decision. But some people just don’t care." ATL ***

Posted:  3/16/2009 5:11:21 PM
P: 3/16/2009 5:16:24 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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i think i will give that a shot lucy
also interviews shouldnt be a problem, fi actually has a minor in theatre and has taken 4 or 5 makeup classes and has learned how to cover up tattoos :) that sure came in handy huh!

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 5:16:24 PM
P: 3/16/2009 8:25:33 PM
Italiahaircolor
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Date: 3/16/2009 4:46:40 PM
Author: Smurfysmiles
Well we know fi's job accepts tattoos because that is kind of where he got the idea, a coworker of his has his wedding ring tattooed on and it looks fantastic and hes had it for 5 years now. as for me if a job doesnt allow it fine, then ill freelance until i do find a job that allows it and also my e-ring will be on the same finger so were not too concerned about that. ive thought about getting a different kind too like italia mentioned but i havent thought of anything that is quite as meaningful as the ring yet..

Okay, not to pick on you...but I want to point out a few small flaws..

Is your FI planning on staying in his current job forever?  If not, then what his current job does/doesn't accept will not always matter. Depending on what he does for a living, stage makeup may not cut it.  Working in the cosmetic industry, please let me tell you first hand, tattoo's aren't easily covered, but being that this would be on your/his finger, the makeup will wear off extremely quickly--probably before the intial interview is even done! 

Also, freelancing sound great...but please keep in mind the economic climate...it's hard enough to just plain find a job, let along pick and choose which job you'll take.  If an employer is against finger tat's...and you have one...you've just lost out on an opportunity. 

These are real concerns...romance and meaning is great, fine and dandy...but be 100% informed that people judge, assume and make snap decisions not always in your favor if you decide to artisitically decorate your body.

____________________________
Remember to keep your words soft and sweet...you may have to eat them someday.

Posted:  3/16/2009 8:25:33 PM
P: 3/16/2009 8:46:07 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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you're not picking on me italia, just trying to help me see the other side of things :)

as for freelancing, i was able to get a contracting job without even having an in person interview, we did it over the phone and via email since it is long distance.

also we will most likely get it likely smaller than the actual rings we are getting so if we absolutely needed to we could slip our rings over the top.

and this isn't even concrete yet, just an idea we are throwing up in the air :)

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 8:46:07 PM
P: 3/16/2009 8:50:15 PM
jstarfireb
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Date: 3/16/2009 5:11:21 PM
Author: lucyandroger
Smurfysmiles, you could always wear a big thick band to cover up the tatto when you go on interviews...


I was just going to suggest this! In fact, the bands you get for the wedding day could serve double duty for this.

The tattoo idea is certainly unconventional, and you've gotten a lot of realistic advice so far, but you should do whatever makes you and your FI happy. Just keep in mind that certain more conservative members of society will judge you for it. I would make sure the tattoo is small enough and the wedding band is big enough that it could be fully covered if necessary.


**************************

"In the end, I wonder if the true movement of the world might not be a voice raised in song." -Muriel Barbary

Posted:  3/16/2009 8:50:15 PM
P: 3/16/2009 8:57:52 PM
musey
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I always say to each his/her own (especially since you didn't ask in your OP what people thought, I read it more as a statement than a question/invitation for advice), but then I live in a very liberal city... you'd be hard pressed to find an employer here that would have a strong objection to something like that, I think. Especially in your field, which I believe is graphic design, right?

Anyway, for me, one of my favorite things about a wedding band is not just the way it looks, but the feel of it on my finger. I just love that. So a tattoo wouldn't cut it for me, if only for that reason alone!

Posted:  3/16/2009 8:57:52 PM
P: 3/16/2009 9:13:27 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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i live in a VERY liberal city (Denver) or at least that's how I've judged it to be so far. That's another reason I'm not too concerned about it and I know someone will probably now chime in with, but what if you move?! lol I'm gonna be with fi forever, whether we have jobs or no jobs, live in a different place or live here, etc. etc. so its just more a matter of deciding whether to get it or not. so far the main thing i've read that makes me not want to do it is that if the artist isn't very skiled, the tattoo can result in a hairline fracture on your finger, wth! not a big fan of that happening so it will just take some more thinking i guess

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  3/16/2009 9:13:27 PM

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