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 What is your budget???

P:  2/11/2009 2:49:41 PM  
PilsnPinkysMom
PilsnPinkysMom

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Ladies- I hope this isn't rude of me to ask (& forgive me if it is!) but what is the budget for your wedding? Are you sticking to it well, or are you anticipating some major overage? Are you and your FI paying for it all, or are your parents/future in-laws helping? If you want to, provide a break-down of how much you're spending on each area (food/venue, photos, music, dress & accessories, flower/decor, etc)

Again-- I hope this isn't rude to ask. I'm just curious-to-the-max as to what people are "getting" for their money. FI and I set a budget of 25k max. We're paying for the wedding ourselves. My parents graciously offered to pay for my gown and alterations, so we're able to use that money for other things. Our guest list is between 150-160, give or take a few... and the venue, plus tax & tip, is about $81/person.... extra charges for having the ceremony there & for upgraded linens.

Our photogs are a bit over 3k, DJ is $1200, invites/STD/postage will be a bit over $300, hotel (for us and officiant/uncle + his wife) will be just under $500... Things that are TBD- dress accessories, hair/nails/makeup, transportation (plane tickets for us & shuttle for guests), tux, attendant gifts, and FLOWERS.

Flowers are my #1 concern right now. I've received two quotes thus-far, ranging from just under $2,000 to nearly $3,000. I would like to stay under $1,500, as other costs are adding up quiiiickly. I'm trying to decide how important coursages and bouts for the moms/dads/grandmas/grandpas are... and also whether or not I want "altar" decorations. Our venue provides centerpieces (albeit plane-jane, ho-hum ones), so I'm tryyyying to stick to my guns and not have centerpieces done by a florist. FI and I also REALLLLLLY want event lighting, as everything will be taking place after sundown, and our venue is on the dark side.

One florist/event planner quoted $500 for an awesome array of lights (4 up-lights for pillars surrounding our dance floor, uplights with golden gels for around the altar area, wall pattern-lighting in gold tones, and dance floor lighting) We asked our photogs for their professional opinion regarding the lighting issue in our venue, and both agreed that it is quite dark and has created photography challenges for them in the past. With this information in the back of my mind, I'm very hesitant to nix a lighting package.

So what to sacrafice? I'm generally pretty level-headed about keeping a cap on the wedding budget (I mean, we could have a down payment for a house!) but as the wedding draws near (um, 10 months away?) I'm warming up to the mantra, "This is my only wedding. It should be exactly what I envision."

I'm not so sure that's a good thing. I mean, we don't want to incur any credit card debt over this day. The reason for a 25k cap is because that's what FI can reasonably save over the course of a year. I'm thinking that if I reallllly behave with other accessories, hair & makeup, that a splurge of $500 or so in the flower dept. won't be a big deal.

Sorry this is long and rambly and kind of pointless... i'm just really stressing over the flower/decor details. So yes- if you'd like- share your budget & also your budget woes!
Posted:  2/11/2009 2:49:41 PM

 There are 95 replies to this message.  There are 30 replies on this page.

P: 2/11/2009 3:06:27 PM
tlh
tlh

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my parents say you will go 30% over budget... no matter how frugal you try to be.  It is just the vision, gets ahead of itself... So whatever your budget is... you will end up going over 30%... because of the other incidentals.  So if your budget is 25K it could end up being 32.5K without you even realizing it... and without you feeling like any of it could be cut....

There are ways to scrimp, Friday VS Saturday will make a huge savings on every single one of your vendors... but figure what is important to you... and you;ll be fine! 

"I like smiling. Smiling's my favorite!" Will Ferrell ~ Elf

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:06:27 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:12:47 PM
Italiahaircolor
Italiahaircolor

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For my wedding in 2007, I didn't have a budget.

____________________________
Remember to keep your words soft and sweet...you may have to eat them someday.

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:12:47 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:15:37 PM
sunnyd
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Oh budget... LOL, so when I first started researching before we were engaged, I figured oh yeah no problem we can have a $10k wedding! Now our total is at just below $15k, which doesn't include flowers or cake totals, just basic estimates. I based $10k on what we could likely afford. Luckily my parents scoffed when I suggested paying for the wedding ourselves!

They took over dress, venue/food and booze. My mom will also insist on other things that she'll pay for that I don't think we need, like a fabric drape to decorate the ceremony. She's a little over the top like that. Yay mom!
FILs are paying for flowers and cake, I think some part of the honeymoon. RD has not been discussed at this point. BBQ?

We're paying for the rest of my accessories (veil, jewelry, shoes), DJ ($750), photography (~$1900, but no album or rights until after the wedding), wedding rings, and BM/GM gifts. And general decor for the whole thing (centerpieces, linens). And invites. My sister is officiating, so we don't have to pay anything for that.

Oh and rehearsal dinner and honeymoon are not accounted for in that $15k estimate. *#$@!!! Everything keeps going up! 9% tax is a killer too. Stupid tax.





Posted:  2/11/2009 3:15:37 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:17:49 PM
allycat0303
allycat0303

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I don't have a budget. And that's not to say that it's because we have unlimited amount of money. It's because it would make me really stressed out if I thought about it, AND I don't think I have a realistic idea of what costs what.

I pretty much have entered this saying "I want it to be decent" and have tried to find the lowest prices for everything I could. And eliminated the extras which I don't think necessary. i.e limo (the reception is 2 minutes away by car. No way am I spending 1500$ for that), and for the flower centerpieces, I just said, I want them all red, cheapest flowers possible.  

I'm not even going to add it up at the end because it would cast a whole negative shadow on it. I'm a pretty frugal/practical person, so I wouldn't be able to enjoy the experience.

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:17:49 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:19:37 PM
Smurfysmiles
Smurfysmiles

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We have a budget but I dunno what it is. My parents are paying for all of the wedding and will let me know when we get close to hitting the mark but I anticipate it being between 10-15k

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." ~Rita Rudner I marry my best friend on 11/14/09!

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:19:37 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:21:45 PM
booswim542
booswim542

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I JUST did my budget today! Perfect timing for this thread! I found a super deal on a dress I might end up buying (I still need to post on here for opinions!)

I have about 85 guests - we'll see how that changes - my wedding is not till May 2010 or after. We already have our rings and FI has a suit to wear (so I didn't include them). We also have baskets for the flowergirls to use and we're not going to stay in a hotel the night after because we're trying to stay on a super tight budget.

I didn't think about BM gifts or GM gifts until just now - but I have a year and a half so I am sure I will find something reasonable...

We're paying for about $3000. FMIL is paying for about $3000 and my parents will be paying about $3000.


 

 

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:21:45 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:24:47 PM
EBree
EBree

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The budget for our September 2007 garden wedding for ~120 people was $15,000, and I don't remember going over much at all- $1,000 maybe?

It's easy to stick to your budget if you keep detailed lists of what you need and how much you've already spent. If not, little things will add up quickly and you'll be holding on to a pretty hefty chunk of wedding debt, something you don't necessarily want to be thinking of on your honeymoon. IMO, things to splurge on: Food, photography, a dress that makes you feel beautiful. Not worth it? Favors and other tiny details very few will notice.

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:24:47 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:27:02 PM
DiamondsforDee
DiamondsforDee

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Our budget is about $40k but everytime I turn around it increases.  It started at $25k when we got engaged in October, we're already up to 40k and we are still over 14 months out.  My odd budget gripe is that my parents are graciously paying for most of the wedding but are making plans for a reception that is far more expensive and extravagent than we had planned on.  Everytime I talk to my Dad he adds new things I should ask about for the reception- his latest bit is that we need either a signature cocktail or champagne to be handed out as people walk in to cocktail hour.  We're already doing open bar!  That is going to add $1000 to the bill.  And while I am not paying, I don't want the things FI and I do pay for to look kind of lame or shoddy next to these really fancy things my parents have paid for.  FI descibed it as us not being able to afford the caliber of reception my parents are planning.   When we spoke to my parents about our concerns they said they would just pay for anything over our contribution, but I still feel bad.  I feel like a brat for complaining, but I really don't want them to spend a ton of extra money on things we don't need. 

Basic breakdown:
Reception: 20k (assuming 100 people so yeah, $200/head including tax and gratuity)
Photographer: 2k
Band: 5k (a DJ just would not work at our reception site so yea 5 times more expensive!)
Church & Officiant: 1k
Trolley for guest transportation: 1k (we have 75% OOT guests and the church and reception site are 2 miles apart so a trolley it is)
Dress: 2k
FI Tux: 1.5k (he insists on buying)
Flowers & Invitations & STDS: 1k (going cheap here since no one complained when I said I wanted to go cheap here)
All of the other remaining "minor" expenses total around 4k, bringing us in at $37.5k


I would definitely consider cutting some flowers to get the lighting package if your photographer agreed that the dark lighting could be an issue for pictures.  I think you've got the right attitude to try and save a little more or to look for other areas you can cut as opposed to take on CC debt. 

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:27:02 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:37:36 PM
Honey228
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Hi Pilsn. I don't think it's a rude thread and I'm sure that there have already been some threads that probably touched on this topic. I think something that needs to be considered is where the wedding located. But regardless of that I think that if you're getting all of that for 25k then you're doing pretty good! Heh, I'd encourage you to stick to your budget AND get what you want. Helpful, huh.

If you only need to knock off 500 your floral budget, I'm sure there's some way you could trim it. Any really handy friend who could make the bouts/corsages for you? Smaller altar decorations or less expensive flowers? Keep the plain jane centerpieces but maybe dress them up on the cheap? I found out that you can get tea light holders for 1.99/12 and tea light candles for 3.99/100 at IKEA. I agree, I think event lighting can do wonders for a room especially if it tends to be dark. I considered it, but I think it depends on the mood of your reception. I see more dining than dancing in mine, so I wouldn't mind a romantic candle-lit room. But I want live music and a little bit of dancing too, so there should be at least some lighting. Yours sounds very cool though, you got the support of the photogs, and you sound like you REALLY want it - so keep it! Do you mean that you'd trim the $500 from your bridal accessories, hair, and makeup to put back in the flowers? I think whatever's most important to you, you should keep.

I can't talk much about my budget. Ok, well I can, but it makes me feel like I'm wacko b/c I'm still a LIW. But I went over my wedding budget to make sure that I'm pretty positive that it will work before we splurge on the ring. I can tell you that we plan on 20k for 65 people in San Antonio. And so far the only area where it looks like I might save on (spending less than the quoted "guidelines") are the invitations. And that's if I do my own calligraphy. Eek, I have to learn calligraphy. I'm doing other DIY things too. I still think that it's way too easy to slip over budget. I'm sure that there will be hidden things that I won't have considered. I'm hoping that I'm not terribly underestimating the price of things and gave myself a good wiggle room.

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:37:36 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:44:49 PM
gwendolyn
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Date: 2/11/2009 3:12:47 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
For my wedding in 2007, I didn't have a budget.

No budget as in limitless finances, or no budget as in no money?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
UK Wedding: April ?th, 2010
US Reception: May 30th, 2010!

Out of Context Theatre presents...ladypirate: "Gwen, you would make a terrible medieval catholic priest!"

'One day you will do things for me that you hate. That is what it means to be family.'
-Jonathan Safran Foer, 'Everything Is Illuminated'

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:44:49 PM
P: 2/11/2009 3:54:48 PM
Haven
Haven

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We had a budget, then we went over the budget, then my parents stepped in and said they had been planning on paying for the wedding for us but didn't want us to change our choices because of that, so they graciously picked up most of the tab.

Our wedding ended up costing between 35K and 40K, not including the rings and the honeymoon.

**********************************************************
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"Let your inner Liz Taylor out and rock it." - diamondfan

Posted:  2/11/2009 3:54:48 PM
P: 2/11/2009 4:00:33 PM
KatyWI
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My parents are paying for the majority of the wedding. They gave us a budget of $15K, and we were allowed to go under by as much as we wanted, or over if we wanted to pay for things ourselves. Being that we are adults, we were always going to pay for the rings ourselves, the officiant, and the honeymoon (unless someone comes through and wants to pay for part of it? I don't see this happening though.)

So the breakdown so far is:

Dress: $2500
Photographer: $3000
Reception: $7000 is estimated by the venue for 100 people. We may have slightly less, and my parents are assuming it will probably be $1000 more, so let's bump it to $8000. This includes an open bar at the cocktail hour, and beer and wine all night.)
Total so far is $13500!!!

I haven't planned a lot of the smaller stuff, but the major stuff left is flowers, cake, and invites. The flowers will probably be about $1000 from estimates so far, the cake will be about $300, and I have no idea about the invites. I only have $200 in the budget to work with, but I'm positive my parents are okay with exceeding budget by a hundred or two dollars, so there you have it.

Until I decided to actually have the reception at my dream location, the band was in the budget. They're friends of ours, so we're getting an amazing deal - 4 hours with a 9 piece band for only $2000. We'll be paying for that ourselves.

Since FI's family is basically broke, they are not offering any money at all. We will be hosting a rehearsal dinner ourselves, but are only budgeting a few hundred dollars - we're doing burgers, brats, and chicken on the grill, and we'll buy a keg and some booze. We think it will be awesome to do it at home, so everyone can dress cute but not dress up, and we can all really have fun and get to know each other. Our house has a fire pit off the deck... so we'll have a big bonfire once the sun sets!!

So any of the extras - accessories, shoes, gifts for BM/GMs, etc... it's all on us. The whole shebang (excluding the honeymoon, which is a wedding expense but I don't consider it in the budget) will probably be around $18-$19k. It's pretty formal and I'm pretty much getting the best of everything, just for a smaller number of people than most. I'm super excited. I hyperventilate sometimes that we're spending so much on one day... but it's one of the most important days of my life and I don't want to regret anything! We can always make more money :)

Posted:  2/11/2009 4:00:33 PM
P: 2/11/2009 4:09:35 PM
NewEnglandLady
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We also had a September 2007 wedding and our budget was $25k--essentially we decided we didn't want to take anything out of savings and $25k was what we could save over the course of our engagement. The wedding itself cost us about $12 or $13K--I have the exact amount on a flash drive, but can't find it.

Posted:  2/11/2009 4:09:35 PM
P: 2/11/2009 4:39:53 PM
parrot tulips
parrot tulips

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FI and I came up with a budget of $25k for 80 people (not including rings or honeymoon), because it was what we'd be comfortable paying on our own. It's a Bay Area wedding, if that makes a difference. I've done a pretty good job of making sure we stick to it. I had to compromise on a few aspects of the wedding to have the venue/caterer I wanted, but I'm still thrilled to pieces with everything we've selected so far. These are over-estimated rough numbers, including tax & tip for everything so far:

venue: 4500
catering: 9000 (including tax & tip, not including booze)
alcohol: 1500 (?)
cake: 500
dress: 843
accessories: 350 (?)
groom's attire: 1500 (?)
make-up: 660 (for myself, 2 sisters, mother, and friend/officiant - includes 20% gratuity)
hair: 510 (for myself, 2 sisters, mother, and friend/officiant - includes 20% gratuity)
photographer: 1800 (8 hrs., second shooter, dvd negatives, 40 page album, online gallery, e-session)
flowers: 1565
dj: 1400
invitations: 400
misc. decor: 500


 


 

Posted:  2/11/2009 4:39:53 PM
P: 2/11/2009 5:20:01 PM
Elmorton
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DH and I first planned a budget of 10k - I even still have the piece of paper where we planned it. That was silly.

No one ever calculated a final total, but our guess is somewhere between 22-26k, including honeymoon and rehearsal dinner but not including rings. We really didn't do anything excessive (though we didn't scrimp on photography or menu) and I think our reception was about $50 a head or so, but what really killed the budget was that it was OOT for me and my family (DH's hometown) so a small fortune was spent in hotel rooms.

DH's parents helped a lot - about 8k, but the rest was on my parents' dime - they did not set a budget for us, but they also understood that DH and I did not want a huge, extravagant affair, so I think DH and I were probably more concerned about budget than they were.

Pilsn, for ceremony floral arrangements, what about greenery instead of flowers? I wanted HUGE arrangements at our venue - it was an outdoor park, and there was some scratching/graffiti type stuff on the stone ledges that I wanted covered - and I nearly died when the florist qtd the price. He saw my reaction and suggested I rent green plants instead - for I think $16 each, I rented these LARGE boston ferns from them and they inserted some ribbon with my wedding colors as a detail. It was perfect. Maybe something like that could help with your dilemma?


Posted:  2/11/2009 5:20:01 PM
P: 2/11/2009 5:25:59 PM
honey22
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Honey's Budget:

X x Y = OUCH

where:

X = original estimate
Y = 2
OUCH = total figure


In other words:

reception disclaimer: venue hire, theming and estimated drinks $5500 (18 people, HOWEVER! we have to pay for a 25 person minimum, and we are getting married at a 5 star resort smack bang on the beach of an expensive area). Sounds crazy if you work it out to per head, but we chose the venue as we absolutely love it. We are not having a small wedding to make it cheap, we are having a small wedding as that's what we truly want).



reception - 5500
photog - 3500
cake - 150
flowers - 850
ceremony, including officiant - 2400
dress - 3100

Crap I feel sick, I don't wanna keep listing stuff We don't have a budget, we are just going to have the wedding we want to have. That said, we are postponing our big honeymoon until next year, but I am totally fine with a little road trip down the coast for some surfing and seafood together.

Wedding Date Take 2: 26th November 2009!

Posted:  2/11/2009 5:25:59 PM
P: 2/11/2009 6:19:07 PM
Honey228
Honey228

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Date: 2/11/2009 4:09:35 PM
Author: NewEnglandLady
We also had a September 2007 wedding and our budget was $25k--essentially we decided we didn't want to take anything out of savings and $25k was what we could save over the course of our engagement. The wedding itself cost us about $12 or $13K--I have the exact amount on a flash drive, but can't find it.



Whoa! You only spent half your budget! You're now my budgeting role model.

Posted:  2/11/2009 6:19:07 PM
P: 2/11/2009 6:24:02 PM
Italiahaircolor
Italiahaircolor

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Date: 2/11/2009 3:44:49 PM
Author: gwendolyn

Date: 2/11/2009 3:12:47 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
For my wedding in 2007, I didn't have a budget.

No budget as in limitless finances, or no budget as in no money?
Unlimited funds. 

My parents paid for our wedding...grand total was well over 100k

____________________________
Remember to keep your words soft and sweet...you may have to eat them someday.

Posted:  2/11/2009 6:24:02 PM
P: 2/11/2009 6:46:28 PM
booswim542
booswim542

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Quick thread hijack...sorry in advance - but I think you will all agree with this...

Italiahaircolor! Your wedding must have been amazing! Did you post pictures anywhere on PS? If so, do you have the link? I would love to see them.

Posted:  2/11/2009 6:46:28 PM
P: 2/11/2009 6:50:27 PM
mayachel
mayachel

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I believe that knowledge is power when it comes to money. How could the rest of bargain and barter without an idea of what others are paying? I'm all for transparency when it comes to reasonable requests...we just haven't started putting our money out yet! Will come back to update. Right now we are looking at venues around $100-150 pp. With an expectation of 150 guests.

I think in my head I've justified up to $2000 for my dress, though I'm on the look out for something used and under $600.

Posted:  2/11/2009 6:50:27 PM
P: 2/11/2009 7:00:17 PM
FrekeChild
FrekeChild

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Hmmm...

We don't really have a budget (limitless), but we want to keep it under $15k. For under 40 people in Vegas, this should be fine, and if I go the way I'm going, it should be way under.

Stuff we've paid for so far:
dress
deposit
shoes #1
STDs
suit
purses
MOH dress
fur stole
accessories for me

Total with the above items is around $1,300, but some of those things were gifts for Christmas (suit) or will be used at other times (accessories, crafting supplies for STDs, purses) so that helps balance the costs. And considering the dress was originally $900, not doing too bad.

The budget I have is laid out like this:
Ceremony package: $3,500(includes ceremony space, flowers, music, officiant, breakfast in bed, a dinner for two, some photography, etc-Platinum Skies Package at Mandalay Bay+tax)
My ensemble: $2,000
Hotel room: $750
Transportation: $600
Post ceremony dinner: $2,500
Photography: $2,000
Miscellaneous: $2,500
Total: $13,850 (I think-I have a headache and don't want to redo it)

To answer your questions:
I'm really expecting to come out under that unless something crazy happens with airlines or food costs. The above budget was proposed to my dad, and he is planning on paying for all of the above. I paid for everything on the list above (of the stuff we've already paid for) except for the deposit, dress and suit. FI is going to try to save around $2k to supplement our trip for shows, food and whatever else we want.

I would breathe and try your hardest to not stress out over it all. I don't know that my budget really helps you out, being that the hotel is doing pretty much everything for us.

_______________________________ "Women are either goddesses or doormats." Pablo Picasso "In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane." Mark Twain

Posted:  2/11/2009 7:00:17 PM
P: 2/11/2009 7:15:30 PM
parrot tulips
parrot tulips

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Date: 2/11/2009 6:50:27 PM
Author: mayachel
I believe that knowledge is power when it comes to money. How could the rest of bargain and barter without an idea of what others are paying? I'm all for transparency when it comes to reasonable requests...we just haven't started putting our money out yet! Will come back to update. Right now we are looking at venues around $100-150 pp. With an expectation of 150 guests.

I think in my head I've justified up to $2000 for my dress, though I'm on the look out for something used and under $600.
Totally agree.

Oh, and btw, don't forget places like Pearl's Place & Net Bride for your dress. I managed to get mine at a $600 savings compared to the salon where I tried it on (although I have a feeling their mark-up was a little high...).

Posted:  2/11/2009 7:15:30 PM
P: 2/11/2009 7:16:35 PM
mjso
mjso

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We don't particularly have a budget, but originally we estimated spending about $30k as that's average for my area.

My parents are paying for everything day of the wedding related, so far.  FI's parents are paying for the rehersal dinner, but there's been no planning on that.  And FI and I are paying for the honeymoon ourselves, which is about $2800 total. 

The day of the wedding costs are around $31k right now as an estimate.  Our venue is $125 per head with a $12k minimum and a $1000 ceremony fee which goes towards our minimum.  I made this estimated spend-to-date spreadsheet with the assumption that we will be having more than the minimum amount of guests, but I really have no idea how many will show up.

Photographer 6500
DJ 1750
Reception Hall 17000
Florist 2000
Dress 1080
Alterations - Don't know yet
Veil - Not sure if I'm having one
Shoes - Haven't gotten one
Hair/Makeup - No one booked yet 
Bagpiper - waiting to see if mom really wants this and books it
Videographer 2100
Officiant 550
Invitations - waiting for the final cost
Save the Dates 250
Favors - not done yet
OOT bags - not done yet

My mom has been involved in pretty much every decision that has been made when it comes to something that is going to have some cost, so she can say if/when she thinks something is too expensive.

I'm sure there are things I'm forgetting in the list that we haven't paid for yet...this is just what I had in the excel sheet that I am anticipating or we have already paid for.

Posted:  2/11/2009 7:16:35 PM
P: 2/11/2009 8:42:11 PM
DMBFiredancer
DMBFiredancer

Ideal Rock
Total Posts: 584
Last Post: 11/3/2009
Member Since: 1/13/2008
 
Date: 2/11/2009 3:15:37 PM
Author: sunnyd
Oh budget... LOL, so when I first started researching before we were engaged, I figured oh yeah no problem we can have a $10k wedding! Now our total is at just below $15k, which doesn't include flowers or cake totals, just basic estimates.


same here

*7.25.09*

Posted:  2/11/2009 8:42:11 PM
P: 2/11/2009 8:48:38 PM
violet02
violet02

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Member Since: 9/5/2007
 
Date: 2/11/2009 3:06:27 PM
Author: tlh
my parents say you will go 30% over budget... no matter how frugal you try to be. It is just the vision, gets ahead of itself... So whatever your budget is... you will end up going over 30%... because of the other incidentals. So if your budget is 25K it could end up being 32.5K without you even realizing it... and without you feeling like any of it could be cut....

There are ways to scrimp, Friday VS Saturday will make a huge savings on every single one of your vendors... but figure what is important to you... and you;ll be fine!

That's not a bad rule of thumb. We originally thought our parents were contributing 50k. We got 35k from them. We planned to put in 7k after our planner worked out our budget for a total of 42k. The actually total was 57k or up to 60k but I hate to think about it being that high. Let's say it wasn't. Ouch. That's not including rings or honeymoon either. That was separate. I highly advise staying very strict about what you spend if you want to stay on track. All of those 'little' things sure add up to a lot. My DH kept saying no no it's those BIG things that did it to us but when I look at the spreadsheet I can see a plethora of little details that added up to a lot. It was worth it though!

Posted:  2/11/2009 8:48:38 PM
P: 2/11/2009 8:54:28 PM
Gypsy
Gypsy

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Total Posts: 14,306
Last Post: 11/20/2009
Member Since: 8/9/2005
 
Date: 2/11/2009 3:06:27 PM
Author: tlh
my parents say you will go 30% over budget... no matter how frugal you try to be. It is just the vision, gets ahead of itself... So whatever your budget is... you will end up going over 30%... because of the other incidentals. So if your budget is 25K it could end up being 32.5K without you even realizing it... and without you feeling like any of it could be cut....

This is exactly what happened to us. 

I had a Sunday night wedding, beer wine and champagne only, and really only splurged on my flowers... everything else I pretty much did on a budget. But there are SO FREAKING MANY small expenses that don't even occur to you until you realize... darn it, I need that.

Posted:  2/11/2009 8:54:28 PM
P: 2/11/2009 9:00:02 PM
Gypsy
Gypsy

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Total Posts: 14,306
Last Post: 11/20/2009
Member Since: 8/9/2005
 
BTW... we stopped counting at 30K to save our sanity. Budget was 15K, then 25K. No debt though. Cash for all of it. Probably spent about 32K when alll was said and done. 68 guests final count.

Posted:  2/11/2009 9:00:02 PM
P: 2/11/2009 10:10:25 PM
blackbetty
blackbetty

Cut Rock
Total Posts: 187
Last Post: 11/20/2009
Member Since: 2/8/2009
 
Ours will be over 40k, and I have an anxiety attack whenever I think about it.

My parents are paying for my big, fat, Italian reception for an invited 300, expected 250 (the venue, which is providing a 4 course meal & 5 hour open bar).  With tax & service (and the ceremony site rolled in), it will be about $29k.  I wanted a wedding for maybe 150, but sometimes it's not about what you want.  FI & I are handling the rest, like my dress & his tux, flowers, photographer, DJ, favors, STDs & invites, attendant gifts, officiant, rings, etc. 

I wish I could afford the beautiful day I want (and chance are I could with 100 less guests), but it seems so extravangent to spend this kind of money.  People are losing their jobs & homes, and it's just so much money to spend on one day.  I hate that my parents, who should be saving for retirement, are paying so much, even if it's what they want.

Flowers are my biggest thing, too.  I'd love to have the receptions dripping in flowers & candles, but due the amount of centerpieces I need, I'm focusing on gorgeous bouquets and doing candle centerpieces with glass cylinders & candles I'm buying from discount internet sites. 

-

What you see depends on what you're looking for.

Posted:  2/11/2009 10:10:25 PM
P: 2/11/2009 10:48:30 PM
Octavia
Octavia

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Total Posts: 1,454
Last Post: 11/20/2009
Member Since: 10/29/2007
 
Originally, I really wanted to keep our budget around $15K. But...I have a very picky fiance (and I'm a wee bit guilty of that, as well) who vetoed every one of my "budget choices." Right now, it looks like it will come in around twice that, which KILLS me. It's way too much money to spend on one day, and I think we're both sort of resenting the cost. We're not even doing anything extravagant -- fruit centerpieces instead of flowers, no limo, using "friendors" when possible -- but everything just adds up from nowhere!

My parents have offered to pay for part of it, but with the economy being what it is, I really prefer them not to. FI's job is pretty secure (he's under contract, and would be one of the last to go if it came to the worst), and my parents' are not nearly so much.

Oh well...at least we can technically afford it, but just because we can doesn't mean I'm happy about it...

Posted:  2/11/2009 10:48:30 PM
P: 2/11/2009 11:05:36 PM
thing2of2
thing2of2

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Total Posts: 7,655
Last Post: 11/20/2009
Member Since: 1/1/2007
 
I don't really have a set budget but I'm hoping to keep it reasonable! Luckily I'm not that into wedding stuff so I don't feel the need to go all out with flowers, decorations, favors, etc. (And there is nothing wrong with being into wedding stuff-I'm just glad I'm not for the sake of my budget!)

So far it's looking like my dress (oops!), the food and the photographer are going to be the big money expenses. Both sets of parents are contributing, but I'm sure we'll put in some of our money too. It'll probably end up being a third my parents, a third his parents and a third us, which seems fair.

Posted:  2/11/2009 11:05:36 PM

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