Help me choose the perfect ring!

[Leviclimber]

Hi Folks,

There is certainly some very interesting and educational reading on this forum. I am hoping to propose this summer and am trying to get the ring thing hammered out (well, not quite literally) before the summer is on me. Actually, I have been educating myself for months, and yet I haven''t yet had the confidence to begin the purchasing part; this is ok, as I still have time and I want to make sure that I do this right. I only get one shot, right ladies? As it turns out, diamonds (and the diamond markets) are far more intricate and complicated than a guy could ever hope...

So I have many questions:

1) Ladies: Size or Color? I am a college student (i.e. Ramen noodles still qualify as a well-balanced meal) and so size doesn''t include the 3c J stones that I have seen on the site (which are quite beautiful). It would probably mean the difference between .75c and 1c. Colors I am looking at range from G to ?. The setting will be yellow gold, so I am interested to hear some opinions on the most yellow color I should consider. I wouldn''t mind seeing some yellow gold rings with some more colored stones (i.e. I-K, or anyone else who wants to show off a beautiful ring).

2) Anyone: I am an engineering student, and I love projects, etc. I spent a little time drawing out some designs in the fall and actually started playing around with CAD to see how one of my designs might look. It is shown with a 1c ''diamond'' of ideal proportions. The ring diameter is about 1mm larger than it should be to fit my girlfriend, and if I had time to work on this design again, I would experiment with making the band a bit thicker, and making the prongs a bit more fitting (and a bit more substantial too). I envision the prongs to be platinum, and the ring in yellow gold. It is meant to have a resemblance to a flower (vaguely). My parents and sister are all in the Flower industry and so I was raised to always bring flowers for dates, a meaningful tradition that my girlfriend loves (i think) and I find rewarding! This will be the most important flower that I ever give her... Thoughts and suggestions as well as plain old reactions are welcome... Ladies, is this personally designed approach romantic, or should I give up and buy a setting elsewhere?

3) Has anyone dealt with niceice? Has anyone bought their market and pricing report? Was it helpful and specifically how? Did you take it with you to a B&M store as ‘ammunition’? I am a bit new to the negotiating thing, but I would like to give it a try, so any suggestions are welcome.

4) I am looking for suggestions for good jewelers in Pittsburgh. I am aware that the Clark building downtown is teeming with them, but I am looking for names I guess. Has anyone had a particularly good (or bad for that matter) experience with a PGH jeweler. Also, I would like a recommendation for an independent appraiser. In PGH would be nice, but anywhere else is fine as well. Just keep in mind that I am still in college, so please stick to the ones that are good (well-reputed) and cheap.

 

[windy1365]

I recommend that you buy a diamond from someone that has an upgrade policy, so when you can afford it, you can upgrade if you want to.

I would say go as large as you can and go no lower than an H or I. My diamond is a G and it is colorless. I can see color in the I''s at the mall from the side.

 

[Leviclimber]

Thanks Windy! Everyone else, let see some comments! I am interested in hearing some opinions, etc. Alternatively, just post your gold ring here. I''d like to admire it!

Thought: Should I break this post down into separate posts (i.e. Bite-size) so viewers can chisel away at what interests them?

 

[belle]

hey leviclimber! welcome to ps!
no need to break it down.....we''ll get to all of it eventually!
first of all the following are only my opinions, and should be taken just as that!
as for the question of size or color...my answer is cut!....you''ve been reading, surely you realize that is the most important c! seriously, though, if you are talking about the difference between .75 and 1ct, i (personally) would take a well cut, slightly smaller diamond, over something not so much larger. but, that''s me. if you think your s.o. would need to have 1ct....you better shoot for that. the other benefit of a well cut diamond, is it hides color well. there have been some very happy people purchasing well cut "j" colored stones around here lately!
i think it is super cool that you took the time to design a ring.....but, there is probably a reason you haven''t seen such a style ever before...a mount not only protects the diamond, but showcases it as well. it really is a nice idea....but i can''t help but think that those "petals" could injury somebody!...youch! i say go with a tried and true design. if you want, you could work with a craftsman to develop an idea...maybe incorporate a floral motif into the band somewhere. actually, you would be surprised how many have that type of design (girlsl like flowers!)

finally....you might want to take a look through here for ideas on settings.

best of luck to you!!

 

[Shay]

I think your ring is lovely, as is the sentiment behind it. To avoid the issues that belle talked about, take it to an experienced jeweller and he can discuss issues of security and comfort before they make the wax mould.

Alternatively you could look at a ring with many smaller diamonds set as petals. This will have the flower symbolism you desire as well as being more cost effective for a student. You can always upgrade to a monster stone later in life.

 

[Daniela]

As Belle already metioned, cut is important. You can get away with a slightly lower colour if it''s well-cut. I have an H and it is as white as the dickens. I can''t comment on any other colours because I''ve never seen well-cut ones (so my real-life diamond colour knowledge is limited).

Your question kind of depends on what extent a person would have to sacrifice. For example, if you''re looking at a G VS-1 around 80 points and an H VS-2 or spic-and-span-clean SI-1 that''s close to a carat, I''d go for size. But if we''re talking J colour (regardless of the all the beautiful J''s around here) I would probably not go for it just on the off chance your girlfriend is sensitive to colour, which does happen.

So I guess the real question is: what''s your budget? And what is possible within that budget?

 

[pearcrazy]

I think with some searching that you can find a well cut J or even K colored stone in your budget. If you really hunt you'll be able to find a nice eye clean SI2 that can save you even more. If you are going to have the stone set in yellow gold as opposed to white or platinum then you should be fine going lower in color. I like your ring design but I think it needs some tweaking to eliminate those petal tips that look like they'd be very sharp and would catch on her hair and clothing like crazy. Good luck in your searching. Be patient and try to enjoy your treasure hunt.

My diamond is an I color set in 14k yellow gold and it looks very white and bright to me.

 

[lizzyd]

Hi Leviclimber,

A few thoughts on your questions.

Your design is absolutely beautiful and so unique and personal to you. Others have said what I thought too, anything that sticks out from the ring may catch on things and scratch other people (think: folding laundry, changing a diaper on a squirmy baby, etc.). You''d hate for the ring to be damaged, or for it to hurt someone, or, god forbid, lose the stone!

You''d also hate for it to spend more time in the box than on her hand. Also, you might want to think about ease of cleaning the ring/stone. How much cookie dough is going to get stuck in it? The cleaner she can keep the diamond, the more it will sparkle!

Perhaps sticking with something tried and true is the way to go for now. That way, there won''t be so much sentimental attachment to it if you decide to upgrade in the future and need to get a bigger setting. Perhaps you could save your design for a nice right hand ring (RHR) on a significant anniversary?

Niceice is fantastic! I bought their report and some tools (like a loupe, a polishing cloth and some tweezers). The info on their web site is terrific. Their stones are SO high-end though that they might be a little out of your range for the purchase? I''m just guessing.

You haven''t said what your budget is, which would be helpful to know.

A few ideas to save money: The diamonds at Whiteflash.com in the Expert Selection are beautiful and very well cut. You could go all the way from an H/VS2 to a K/SI2 or any combination in between, depending on desired size and budget, and do really well on price. They can also produce almost any setting you could ask for. Look here http://whiteflash.com/diamonds/expert-selection/1.htm . Plus, they have a good trade up policy.

Have you thought about a colored gem stone for the center stone and some small diamonds for side stones? Pink saphires, rubies, etc. can be beautiful, and very reasonable. Look here http://www.cherrypicked.com/ . Then, if you decide to upgrade in the future, you could keep the original stone as a side stone for a new ring, as a pendant, or pair it for earings (actually, you could do that with any diamond you buy now too).

You could also get a simple solitaire engagement ring and then use the flower motif in the wedding band, like this http://mwmjewelry.com/recent-work.html

That''s all I can think of for now. Wow, this is a long post. Good luck, and keep us posted!

Cheers,
LizzyD

 

[soulsis]

I guess coming from a woman in waiting I would have to say style is important, but not as important as being able to upgrade. I had an excellent cut princess diamond in my previous marriage. D colour and an SI2. You could see NOTHING on it. It was gorgeous. So I think that a great cut enhances a beautiful diamond...that''s most important. I would rather have a .25 E SI1 excellent cut diamond over a 3 carat G VS2 fair cut any day. I have seen some pretty crappy diamonds in some women that wanted size over quality.

 

[Leviclimber]

Hey People,

Your feedback is really great, and I really appreciate it. The comments on the design are most appreciated. The points on the petals will definitely be a problem (she loves to bake and we are both avid outdoors people). So thanks belle, shay, pearcrazy, and lizzyd! Also thanks for the advice on color Daniela, Pearcrazy and Soulsis. And thanks to anyone else that I may have missed!

Here are a few additional facts:

1) I would like an ideal cut diamond (H&A or Eighternity not necessary), so the choice between color and size is based on both diamonds being ideal cut, and similar clarity (lets say SI1-VS1).
2) I have managed to weasel some likes and dislikes out of my girlfriend. I know that she doesn''t want multiple stones, nor does she want anything but a diamond. I had specifically asked her about alexandrite (her birthstone) when we were admiring a friend''s sapphire, but she said no (thank goodness, choosing alexandrite is just as tough as diamond and even more expensive). But thanks shay and lizzyd, I do appreciate the suggestions. I will look at whiteflash''s offerings. She definitely wants gold.
3) I have seen a couple of forums for higher color stones set in platinum and white gold, but I haven''t seen one on higher color stones set in yellow gold. I would appreciate if some viewers would post their rings so I could see what this combo looks like. Pearcrazy, I would love to see your diamond.

Extra thanks to lizzyd for going the extra mile! Everybody, keep em comin!

 

[pearcrazy]

Thanks for asking. Here it is. Keep in mind that fancy cuts show color more than rounds so a round diamond would probably look whiter.

*edited to say WHOA sorry it's so huge and don't mind my wrinkly hands

 

[pearcrazy]

Here''s a link to SevensOne''s K colored diamond set in white gold.

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/o-k-its-a-k-okay.22748/

 

[lizzyd]

Wow - Pearcrazy, that look sincredibly white. What color grade is it?

Leviclimber - to be blunt, what is your budget? Even a ballpark figure would help.

LizzyD

 

[sparkling]

While I laud your creativity and romanticness, this is the kind of thing I''d probably share before rather than surprise her with. That way if she doesn''t like it you still get credit for being thoughtful and she can guide you towards a more "her" kind of style.

I have an alternate suggestion for encorporating flowers-you could have the ring engraved with a flower quote. I am partial to Robert Burns, My love is like a red red rose. You may want to have the engraving done after she accepts the proposal. You could use the whole thing as a reading at the wedding on the invites or inside the ceremony program. I think its one of the sweetest poems ever.

0, my love is like a red, red rose,
that''s newly sprung in June.
0, my love is like a melody,
that''s sweetly play''d in tune.
As fair thou art, my bonnie lass,
so deep in love am I,
And I will love thee still, my dear,
till a'' the seas gang dry.
Till a'' the seas gang dry, my dear,
and the rocks melt wi'' the sun!
And I will love thee still, my dear,
while the sands of life shall run.
And fare the weel, my only love!
And fare the well awhile!
And I will come again, my love.
Tho it were ten thousand mile!
I am thinking about doing this for my fiance''s wedding band with the Etta James song At Last

At last my love has come along
My lonely days are over
And life is like a song
Ohh yeah yeah
At last
The skies above are blue
My heart was wrapped up in clover
The night I looked at you
I found a dream, that I could speak to
A dream that I can call my own
I found a thrill to press my cheek to
A thrill that I have never known

Ohh yeah yeah

You smile, you smile
Oh and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
For you are mine at last
I found a dream, that I could speak to
A dream that I can call my own
I found a thrill to press my cheek to
A thrill that I have never known

Ohh yeah yeah

You smile, you smile
Oh and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
For you are mine at last
At last... at last

 

[Mara]

having had a G stone and then an H stone and now a J stone, I say go as big as you can with a lower color and lower clarity, as long as it is eye clean...and get what you can for your budget.

my husband has an E stone and we can't see one difference in his E stone vs my J stone when both are set. of course if you scrutinize it side by side on white paper etc etc then you may see some difference, but in reality on the hand, CUT is the king, so if you are buying a RB, make sure the cut is precise and the color will be masked.

as long as you and your fiancee-to-be do not have very sensitive eyes to color, you would be fine with a lower color.

my two cents!!

love your mockup of the setting!

 

[Leviclimber]

Lizzyd...you are persistent! I was trying to dodge that question, but you have been so helpful so I will tell you. I have about $4000 total to work with (may increase in the near future). That has to cover a diamond, a ring, and anything left over will be diverted to making the proposal extra special (I have a pretty neat plan for it). I would like to spend about 3000 on the diamond, but may be persuaded to spend more for a good deal. These figures are all really rough and ballpark at the moment, but I will be making some decisions in the near future about how the numbers will change (you know, after I sell my guitar, climbing gear, car, and GI Joe collection...).

Pearcrazy, thank you very much for posting your ring. It is very stunning! Also thanks for the link to CrazySteve's K. It looked beautiful and I could not detect color in it. Do you know where I can find a picture of a high color stone in a gold setting that puts the gold right next to the stone. I would like to see what kind of interaction there is. Perhaps another angle on your ring that juxtaposes gold on diamond?

Sparkles, I used to have an english springer spaniel named gunner....great dog. As for your poem, that is a wonderful poem, but I don't think that my gf has the patience for classic poetry (for her, too many thee's and thou's and hithertofore's, but I love it). On the other hand, we both LOVE classic jazz. Ella is her favorite, and that is actually one of her favorite songs that Ella covers.

Mara, I really appreciate your input! I have seen a few of your other posts around the site and have grown to appreciate your insight and advice...especially when it applies to me!

Keep it Comin!

 

[pearcrazy]

Ah, now the fun starts with the posting of the budget. If you are OK with buying online you will get lots of great suggestions on the best bang for your buck. I think if you submit your rendering to some of the online vendors who do custom work you can get exactly what you are looking for and still stay in your budget.

Lizzyd- my pear is an I color

 

[Leviclimber]

Thanks Pearcrazy, I will get that ball rollin''!

 

[pearcrazy]

A simplier setting idea with a "floral" motif would be a tulip setting for the diamond. Just a thought.

And here''s one to get the ball rolling. It''s over your budget but a simplier non-custom setting could keep you close to your budget.

http://www.dirtcheapdiamonds.com/diamond_detail.cfm?did=6908652

 

[elepri]

That''s a very cool, unique, and certainly romantic design. However, i wonder if it would be comfortable to wear because the "petals" look like they might easily snag on things. Perhaps, if you work with an experienced jeweler, they could modify it if necessary. As for size vs. color, it''s very personal. I know many people here are happy with Is and Js, even Ks. I can see color in them and would never go below H. A lot of people here say that you can only tell the difference when you put your diamond right next to a higher color one. Well, after I got engaged i learned that comparing diamonds side by side is really not that uncommon (it may just be that all my friends are weird, or newly engaged, or both). Plus once you get to a J, you don''t really need to compare side by side, it''s pretty obvious (to me anyway). So basically, i''d maximize the size as long you don''t have to sacrifice too much in color. I thinkyYou can drop clarity though down to SI1 and even SI2, if it''s really eye-clean.

 

[fire&ice]

Leviclimber - while a pleasing design & a lovely sentiment attached - here''s my thoughts about the setting - She wants a diamond. She wants one diamond. She wants a round. Sounds like she wants a traditional engagement ring - i.e. tiffany type setting. The tulip setting is a nice compromise.

Save the design for a future project. She can wear that ring when she is not baking, climbing, etc. She will want to wear the e-ring pretty much 24/7

I''m with Mara - you can really maximize your budget going the SI clarity route & near colorless I/J.

Good luck! 3k is a nice budget & will afford a very nice stone.

 

[bluedawg]

Congratulations on your imminent proposal.

I think your ring design is beautiful, both in appearance and in sentiment. I agree with the others that it may not be practical and you should consult an expert in ring design, though.

I got engaged when DH and I were both in grad school and money was an issue. I had no idea that DH was researching the 4Cs but it paid off-- I got a beautiful e-ring.

We are coming up on 10 years of marriage and we are going tomorrow to look at stones to upgrade. We will most likely stick with the same color and clarity, because it''s beautiful to our eyes, but I want a bigger stone.

I have a 1.00 H VS1 round; we will be looking at the 1.5-1.7 size tomorrow.
Personally, I am very sensitive to color-- my friend has a J and it looks like a "color" rather than white to me. But my H looks white. My diamand is set in platinum and hers is white gold-- could be the slight warmth of the metal that makes me see a color to her diamond.

HTH and best wishes

 

[lizzyd]

Leviclimber,

I just PM''d you. Check your mailbox.

LizzyD

 

[Leviclimber]

Hey Folks,

Sorry it took me a little while to get back to this…I wrote a nice lengthy reply and went to send it, and my connection started having ‘issues’. Needless to say, it was lost and I didn’t have the heart to start all over again at that point…so I went climbing for a bit! Hey, it is spring break! A guy has got to get out!
Anyway, this is what I wanted to say:

Elepri – Thanks so much for the shared wisdom. I have decided to take your advice and not consider a more colorful stone (more colorful than H) until I see one in person. I have decided that for this ring, SI-1 is the way to go…I can always upgrade, etc.

Fire and Ice – Thanks to you too for the advice on the setting! I think you are right about finding another setting and saving my design for another time. The engagement ring should be a bit more robust! I do appreciate the advice about color too. Because I have different people saying different things, I am going to play it safe and find out for myself how I react to it. Also, do you know where I can find the tulip setting you talked about. I wouldn’t mind checking it out!

Bluedawg – I am currently in grad school! So I know you understand the financial aspect of funding a diamond on a small stipend. I really do appreciate your advice about the color. It seems that this is a somewhat personal decision, as different people see the issue different ways. One thing that makes me wary of a more colorful stone is that my family is very close-knit, and my sister’s Ering is a D color and similar size to what I am looking at. There is no doubt that my sister and gf will compare rings (probably several times) and so I need to be careful. I think I am going for a better cut than she has, so I should have a little leeway there, but we will see. I’ll have to check it out at a B&M store.

Everyone else…I’m not done taking your advice…Keep it comin’!

And thanks for your time and assistance!

 

[Leviclimber]

And if anyone else hasn''t noticed it yet, two enthusiastic thumbs up for LizzyD. I have noticed in my reading around that she always offers lengthy explanations and valuable insight to PS newcomers. Her ''real-life'' friends are lucky to have her in real life, and we are similarly blessed to have her helping us out here!

 

[michela002]

If the "flower" style of ring you are thinking is her style, I think it''s a lovely idea - very personal and sweet. Just make sure it suits her - she may be a traditionalist, or prefer something plainer ... some girls have very definite ideas about what their engagement ring should look like, lol! (There are a LOT of them on this forum.) But it is really sweet you designing it, and it being based on a personal thing. It will make the ring so much more meaningful to her!

But - see if you can try and design the e-ring in such a way that a wedding band can be worn with it, and for them to sit well (sit flush) together. It may not be a consideration now, but it may matter a lot later. Also, keep in mind she won''t want the ring catching on lots of things - you might need to think about "leaf" placement, just trying to make the ring friendly to clothing etc!

Colour vs size - find the lowest colour you find "acceptable", and get the biggest size you can within that colour/clarity range. But don''t forget - CUT IS SO, SO, SO IMPORTANT. A beautifully cut diamond will sparkle like crazy, and a yellow tinge and/or inclusions should show less. So in terms of priorities, consider this order: Cut, size, colour, clarity.

Clarity - stick with "eye clean" clarities (the SI range should be fine, though it depends a little on the stone). And keep in mind if the stone is a great cut you shoudln''t really notice inclusions at eye-inspection because of the overpowering sparkle!

Colour - If the ring is in yellow gold, as I understand it, you can go a little lower in colour. (Because compared with a white metal, a yellower stone will look yellower. Whereas against yellow gold a yellower stone will look a bit whiter.) Personally, I wouldn''t stray too far below the H/I level, but I would be having white gold or platinum - perhaps, with yellow gold, you can go as low as J/K? (There are some K''s on this forum that are SO white!) Maybe go in to see some stones in person to see when the colour becomes too yellow for you. And keep in mind if the stone has low to medium flourescence it may make the stone look whiter - just make sure the fluorescence isn''t so strong it makes the stone cloudy/milky.

Good luck! It sounds like a wonderful project

 

[lizzyd]

Hey thanks for the kind words. But I''m a newbie here myself, and I hope the expert gods are watching what I write and would jump in and correct me if I point anybody in the wrong direction!

I had three more thoughts:

A nicely cut, smaller diamond in the middle, surrounded by a halo of pave could be made to look like a flower.

Also, have you considered a fancy shape like this http://whiteflash.com/marquise/Marquise-cut-diamond-1154687.htm#
the dimensions make it sound huge even though it''s a relatively modest size stone.

Good Old Gold has some discounted diamonds like this one http://www.goodoldgold.com/0_70ct_f_vs2_ags_ideal.htm

Also, check out the Less than 1ct Thread here https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/under-1ct-diamonds.25028/ for ideas.

That''s all for now.

Cheers,
LizzyD

 

[valeria101]

Well, I just love the swirl rings

The volumes would need reality checking on your drawing, I guess (getting down from there to the size of a 1 carat diamond would make the metal frame thin like a blade - surely not what you intended). Otherwise - I hope someone can render in platinum just the thing.

Here are two somewhat similar settings - although not as bold. Your idea is really lovely, I think.

 

[pearcrazy]

Here''s a link to a company that offers tulipset for princess, marquise, and oval as well as round. You can get a good look and see what they look like.

http://www.ringdesigner.com/mountings/engagement_rings/thumbnails/thumbnails_engagementP01.htm

 

[valeria101]

Another kind of "fold" (showing "workable" thickness of ring) comes from Miky Roof:

It might be worth browsing his website for custom designs in the same spirit.

And one more modernist version listed by Servis & Taylor although this is a designer setting... probably by Eddie Sakamoto:

Hope some of this helps clarify the design