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Ask parents with the ring or not???

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OSU COWBOYS

Rough_Rock
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
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38
I am debating to ask her parents for their blessings with the ring or not with it. I dont know which would be better. I dont want her Dad to think that its a done deal no matter what he says. On the other hand, it shows responsibility and that I am serious. What do you all think?
 

Newfeeflip

Rough_Rock
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Dec 12, 2004
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I would also like to know what people think. Me, personally, I think it should be up to her to "show off" the ring. I think her parents know me well enough that they know I''m serious about marrying their daughter. I''ve also debated whether or not to show the ring to my parents when I tell them the news. Again, I think she should be the one to show everyone her ring.
 

mrmedoes

Shiny_Rock
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Jan 8, 2005
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101
I would refrain from having the ring, but think it really depends on your situation. Personally, I know that my g/f''s dad already calls me the "son in law," so I would have no issue doing it. That being said, it''s still something that you''re probably better off not having on you. If they''d ask, I''d just say that you have something in mind and tell them about it.
 

Gale

Shiny_Rock
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Jul 3, 2004
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Just the fact that you are talkking to her father about future engagement with his daughter should be evidence enough of your sincerity. There is no need to show her Dad the ring when asking for his blessing. Best wishes to you.
 

OSU COWBOYS

Rough_Rock
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Dec 21, 2004
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FYI, I have shown my parents the diamond and they are in love with the stone. I asked my GF what she thinks and she said to have it with you, but also it might show that I am cocky. I just need more opinions. I want it to be perfect with no regrets on how to ask. Maybe I am looking too much into this? Thank you all.
 

wcitygirl

Rough_Rock
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Jan 6, 2005
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86
Well, my opinion is a little different and I don''t know if you all have picked the ring out together or not. BUT. If you are surprising her with the ring, I''ll bet her mom knows her taste pretty well and she would be able to review it for you? It might be really fun to show them the ring? I liked mrmedoes idea about just telling them what you had in mind though

I don''t think having the ring or not having the ring demonstrates a level of sincerity or seriousness. I would, however, maybe carry it on you, just in case after all is said and done the family says: "Let''s see the ring!" you don''t look unprepared.

But, that''s just my opinion???
 

OSU COWBOYS

Rough_Rock
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
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Yes, she has been with me to pick it out and all. I think that I will take it with me and see how it goes. Maybe I will or maybe not but if it seems right I will. Thanks all, if there are anymore thoughts please let me know what you think.
 

JimDiamond

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jun 26, 2004
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131
Ordinarily I would say let her have the joy of seeing it first and showing it to her parents for the first time. In this case she''s already seen the ring. However, I think it''s still true that there is nothing better than being able to show off that ring to everyone those first few days. The fewer people that have seen the ring beforehand the better. If her parents are very important to her I think she''ll enjoy it most if she gets to show it to them the first time herself.
 

HOUMedGal

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 13, 2005
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1,832
I don''t know if it''s kinda too late for this, but my BF asked my dad over Christmas for his blessing, because we planned to start looking for rings in 2005. I think it went something like, "I wanted to make sure that this was OK with you before we started looking at rings and putting that kind of money into it." You might be too far along to do that one at this point, but it''s a suggestion anyhow.
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NoonersMom

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Dec 14, 2004
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353
I agree...I think the fact that you are asking her father''s permission shows how serious you are. Her family is familiar with you as you''ve been dating their daughter and hopefully spending time to get to know the family. I think that in itself is enough. I would use the moment to speak with her dad to tell him about all the wonderful qualities about your gf & what you want for her & your future together. To me, well thought out, articulately presented and heartfelt thoughts are much more important than anything material you could ever show them (at this point in the process).

I also agree that your gf should be the one to show them the ring. IMO, that is her moment to show it off & be proud of both the ring and the fact that she will start planning her future with the love of her life. You will have your moments in asking her father for his blessing & the way you propose. Let the showing of the ring be her moment or a mutually shared moment for the two of you.
 

Petra

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 23, 2004
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23
I''ve always said if you need somone''s permission to get married you''re not old enough to get married.

Seriously what if the father says "get the hell away from my daughter?" Is the wedding off?

If no, then what''s the point of asking?
 

OSU COWBOYS

Rough_Rock
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
I have already purchased the ring and it is being made as we speak. It will be done soon and I am very excited. I plan on making the trip in the next two weeks to ask for his blessing. I am a little nervous!!!
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I know it will be okay but just still a big deal. Thank you all for the input.
 
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