...maybe....sooner than i thought.....

[emilina22]

so we were talking a few nights ago and he looks at me while at a red light and was like...em..what if i propose in december...and i was a littlle taken aback cause i though that we agreed on next spring...and december is in 8 months! and so i was like are you serious or is this another one of the those plans that fall through and hes like no im serious ive been thinknig for a while and i am pushing for this december....thats exiting....

si u want to as how manny of you have had long engagements 1-2 years? how did you guys pace everything? most people i know only have 6 month engagements...so how did you guys or how do you feel about long engagements??

 

[whenharrymetsally]

I''ve actually had many friends that were engaged for at least a year and some of them almost 2 years. They said they wanted to make the committment to each other but wanted to take their time planning and to enjoy some time just ''being engaged''.

 

[Pandora II]

I got engaged on Christmas Eve 2004 and my wedding is 26th July 2008. I was at a wedding last Sunday out in Italy and saw one of FI's best men there who got engaged to his gf in February and their wedding is 6 days before mine.

Very lucky meeting as I didn't even know he had a gf let alone fiancee (FI forgot to tell me

) and they are now going to postpone their honeymoon so that they can attend our wedding - how nice is that!

We are all in our early 30's. Only one of our friends had a quick wedding - she was pregnant within weeks of the engagement and wanted to be married before the baby was born - everyone else seems to be 12-24 months.

Pacing is easy - I've booked the photographer, the venue, the registrar and asked various friends to do bits and pieces. Then I have bought loads of bridals **** to look at for ideas. I like doing crafty things, so I will be making all 120 favours myself - hence I need the time!

 

[anchor31]

My engagement will be 24 months. We wanted to do what whenharrymetsally said, just enjoy being engaged for a while, but unfortunately things turned out differently... The family drama started right away, making things quite unpleasant.

At first, we wanted a September wedding so we started looking at venues in September to get the feel of the season, but in February we changed everything for a smaller, simpler, lighter wedding and sooner. We changed our date to have it as soon as we could have it with my sister being back from her exchange. So basically we started planning 18 months in advance, and it''s been working well. We want to take advantage of it and spread out the spendings, and I get to do some major stuff before school starts again. Plus, my reception venue was already booked up 18 months in advance, so we got lucky!

BUT, it can be very frustrating at times. I often wish we could get married this summer and "get it over with"...

But I suspect that has more to do with the family drama than the planning itself.

 

[MustangFan]

We will have a 15-16 month engagement. Any sooner I''d be stressed over that fact that I have so many things going on, school still, applying as a substitute teacher, working etc. Any longer and it would feel like it''s dragging on, we were thinking hey if it doesn''t work out for next year why not the following, but that seems like forever to have a 2.5 year engagement. The perks are you get to kill yourself slowly with money being spent on the wedding.
P.s. if you''re curious I''ll be 25 and he''ll be 30.5 when we finally tie the knot.

 

[bee*]

That''s great news about the engagement moving forward!

Im going to be having a 2 year engagement too-I want to get another 2 years of school behind me and it will give us time to save also

 

[robbie3982]

My engagement will be about 13 months. I think a year is pretty standard as things seem to book up that far in advance (farther in advance if you want a summer wedding). I think you should be fine with a 1-2 year engagement. You''ll be able to relax with your planning instead of rushing through everything.

 

[hikerchick]

Our engagement will be almost 1.5 years . . . I like the idea of having time to plan and since I will be neck deep in DIY projects, favors, invitations, placecards, programs, flowers, etc . . . it is a bonus to have a long engagement. Now, if only I can get the dang venue and caterer booked already.

 

[neatfreak]

Most people we know are about a year or less. But we''re also in a circle with informal weddings that don''t require a ton of coordination or planning. My view on things is that unless there is a really good reason (i.e., saving up for the wedding of your dreams, your dream venue is booked, family issues, health issues, etc.) engagements shouldn''t be longer than a year-1.5 max. But this comes from the girl who is ecstatic at only having a 6 month engagement, so take it with a grain of salt!

 

[ladykemma]

i have often wondered, as i read your posts, he HAS the famliy diamond, what's he waitin' fer? propose now! these preplanned proposals confuse me.

 

[goldenstar]

We''re going to be engaged for 2 years because I have one year of law school left. We''re looking at venues this summer since its the only time I really have to be free. Once we decide on a venue we''ll book it about a year and a half ahead of the actual wedding date (sometime in Spring 09). We''re in CA and things get snapped up pretty fast.

I''m happy with the long engagement because we get to plan leisurely. I''ve been looking at mags and online to get ideas. We''re doing a little at a time so I think it will really help keep the stress down.

 

[partyjewels]

Our engagement will be about a year and a half to two years, gives us lots of time to plan and save and really spread out the buying of things so we''re not spending a huge lump sum all at once making our eyes bulge out, gives me more time to loose the weight I''ve been wanting to loose (not just for the wedding but in general, I''ve been working on it for a while and it''s slow going :/) and find a dress I feel gorgeous in at a price that doesn''t feel ridiculous! Plus we are doing a very large addition on our house next spring, so we need lots of time to make sure everything gets handled and paid for. I think as long as you are ok with getting engaged ahead of your projected time as well, it''ll be fine!

 

[Haven]

First, CONGRATULATIONS Emilina! This all must be very exciting for you!

As for length of engagement, it seems that whatever is most comfortable for the couple is the best amount of time. Most of my friends who have been married in the last few years have had 1 to 1.5 year engagements; they''re all in their mid-20s and early 30s, they all live in the city (Chicago), and they all planned big, formal weddings. Back when I was in college, the few people I knew who got married had shorter engagements, their weddings were much more informal, and they all happened to be small town people. I think the engagement just has to fit the couple.

I''m still a LIW, but I will definitely need at least one year to take my time and plan everything out. (And I''m a teacher, so I''m pretty much limited to summer a wedding, anyway!)

Whatever you two decide, enjoy your engagement, and enjoy each other!