Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread,

[Gypsy]

For laughs only.

So I was in LA visiting one of my aunts and we went to Singlestone. In one of the displays was a foil backed rose cut ring. My aunt says... "Oh, that's just like mine."

I was unaware that there was such a item in the family. And curious it has escaped my mental inventory of her gems (no, not kidding. She has the nicest pieces in the family so I pay attention.)

Later in the trip we go by her safety deposit box and she pulls out the ring. Beautiful beautiful foil backed large Rose cut in a ballerina setting from the early 60's.

It was her engagement ring to her abusive SOB first husband. So it sits in the safety deposit box all the time. She says to me... "Good, now I know who will appreciate it when I am gone." and has me try it on.

Of course I fell in love. And watched, forlorn, as it was locked back up.

So here's the fun part.

How would YOU (I have NO plans of actually doing this. It is hers to do with as she pleases and what she said does not entitle me to anything) ask auntie to borrow the ring for a while to give it some time out of its prison for good behavior? Or even... gift it to you early.

Feel free to be obnoxious as DF as his worst in your phrasing of the request. Enjoy!

 

[MarionC]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Gypsy, you must find a way to get this!
My Mom showed us an antique diamond watch and other goodies right before she died and we never found them. I still search the web thinking I may see her jewels for sale. I wish to heck I had at least taken that watch - somehow convinced her to let me take care of it for her.
I am racking my brain for a way you can pry it from her. I hope you get some inspiration here!

 

[Ellen]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

This is a tough one, because any talk of looking forward to wearing it, sort of insinuates looking forward to auntie leaving this earth. And asking to wear it now, well, doesn't ring right, no pun intended! However, I think it would be totally in good taste and fine form to write her a thank you note, for taking the time to stop and show you the ring, and let her know how honored you are that she feels you are worthy to receive it.

Than leave it at that and let fate take it course.


That's what I would do anyway.

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Gypsy, you must find a way to get this!
My Mom showed us an antique diamond watch and other goodies right before she died and we never found them. I still search the web thinking I may see her jewels for sale. I wish to heck I had at least taken that watch - somehow convinced her to let me take care of it for her.
I am racking my brain for a way you can pry it from her. I hope you get some inspiration here!

Nope. This is purely fantasy.

It's a reminder of a VERY bad time in her life. I could tell. She's not ready to ever deal with the emotions it brings up for her. And I think it NEEDS to be locked up for her peace of mind. And that is worth more than any gem.

So I won't bring it up. But it's fun to pretend its just a ring (instead of the last remnant of the innocent girl in love for the first time she was when she first wore it) and that I could ask for it. And if it gets lost or sold, that's absolutely fine with me. Seriously. I've seen her emotional scars. It might be that the ring is meant to never be worn again by her blood.

 

[Niel]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

No pictures?!

 

[the_mother_thing]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

I would ask to borrow it to have it "baptised" at a jeweler and released from all evil and wrongdoings tied to it.

 

[AGBF]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

This is a tough one, because any talk of looking forward to wearing it, sort of insinuates looking forward to auntie leaving this earth. And asking to wear it now, well, doesn't ring right, no pun intended! However, I think it would be totally in good taste and fine form to write her a thank you note, for taking the time to stop and show you the ring, and let her know how honored you are that she feels you are worthy to receive it.

Than leave it at that and let fate take it course.


That's what I would do anyway.

I think you should ask her if you can wear it to a very specific occasion and then give it respectfully back, the way The Princess of Wales would return a piece that Queen Elizabeth II lent her. I have lent pieces of my jewelry, back when they were insured (which they no longer are), to my closest friends. One of my best friends, the mother of my godson, took one of my best diamond pieces to South Dakota for the wedding of her of her older son about 15 years ago. (My rings, being a size 6, are too big for her, but I have one pendant with a 2.20 carat stone. She still refers to this as "her" necklace.)

Deb

 

[arkieb1]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Tell her you belong to an online jewellery forum and you took a vote and all the members want to see lots of pics of it. We can even get Kenny and DF to cleanse it for her.....

 

[kenny]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Feel free to be obnoxious as DF as his worst in your phrasing of the request. Enjoy!

You should have just bonked her over the head with a baseball bat and grabbed it.

Seriously, I'd not ask to borrow it, or say anything about why you now look forward to her death.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

My thought is, why are people like that??? I do not get hoarding things or locking them away. If I didn't want the piece or didn't want a reminder of something unpleasant, I'd have given it away or sold it long ago. My full intent, if given the opportunity, is to give away many of my pieces while I am around to see my daughters and granddaughters enjoy them.

That's a tough one. I'd almost rather not know about it since unless she writes that in a will, chances are it might not make it to you.

 

[AGBF]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

My full intent, if given the opportunity, is to give away many of my pieces while I am around to see my daughters and granddaughters enjoy them.

We are sooooo much on the same page, DS!!! Just today I spoke to my brother about giving his daughters my good Christmas china. One is married and will probably be starting a family within the next few years. The other is on her own. My daughter will never have the kind of home in which she entertains. As some of you may recall, I already offered my elder niece one of my diamonds.... I want to see them enjoyed.

Deb

 

[dk168]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

I waited over 30 years before my mum finally let me have her near 2ct MRB.

Yet she was able to part with her imperial jade ring and cab ruby cluster about 20 years ago.

I am guessing the MRB cost a lot more than the other two rings, or that holding on to it, is a way of holding on to me etc...

Good luck to Gypsy, tongue in cheek or otherwise, as I do not have any advice, as I am no good at sucking up to people.

I have seen how it was done by some of my extended family members to my late grandparents, to the point of begging, and I did not like it.

DK

 

[dk168]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Stupid here, may I ask what is meant by "foil back" please?

I associate "foil back" with costume jewellery, and do not realise this is used in fine jewellery too.

Still much to learn and thanks in advance.

DK

 

[susief]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Is it possible that she just does not want it to be worn by someone she loves (now, maybe ever) because it carries such bad "karma" for her?

I am not generally sentimental or superstitious about jewellery, and would happily wear a second-hand ring that was previously used in the failed marriage of people I didn't know, for example. But a ring that represented the seriously abusive marriage of a loved one? I doubt it. I wonder if on her side, she is afraid of what it might bring you.

Could you create a new ring or other piece of jewellery which has the elements of hers that you liked so much? Or buy that Singlestone ring?

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Stupid here, may I ask what is meant by "foil back" please?

I associate "foil back" with costume jewellery, and do not realise this is used in fine jewellery too.

Still much to learn and thanks in advance.

DK

DK: This article addresses your question: http://www.modernjeweler.com/web/online/Diamond-Gem-Profiles/Rose-Cut-Diamond/2$285

 

[dk168]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Stupid here, may I ask what is meant by "foil back" please?

I associate "foil back" with costume jewellery, and do not realise this is used in fine jewellery too.

Still much to learn and thanks in advance.

DK

DK: This article addresses your question: http://www.modernjeweler.com/web/online/Diamond-Gem-Profiles/Rose-Cut-Diamond/2$285

Interesting read, thanks!

DK

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

So here's the fun part.

How would YOU (I have NO plans of actually doing this. It is hers to do with as she pleases and what she said does not entitle me to anything) ask auntie to borrow the ring for a while to give it some time out of its prison for good behavior? Or even... gift it to you early.

Feel free to be obnoxious as DF as his worst in your phrasing of the request. Enjoy!

Borrow the ring from auntie and never to return it...

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Is it possible that she just does not want it to be worn by someone she loves (now, maybe ever) because it carries such bad "karma" for her?

I am not generally sentimental or superstitious about jewellery, and would happily wear a second-hand ring that was previously used in the failed marriage of people I didn't know, for example. But a ring that represented the seriously abusive marriage of a loved one? I doubt it. I wonder if on her side, she is afraid of what it might bring you.

Could you create a new ring or other piece of jewellery which has the elements of hers that you liked so much? Or buy that Singlestone ring?

I think that's a good point. And I certainly respect that. Like I said, it's hers. Unless it is actually given to me, I have no claim to it. And whatever her reasons are, it doesn't have to be justified to me.

It's not something I'd buy myself. I really only want it because it is hers. My mother likes jewelry but she has different taste than I do, I would be most likely to pass on anything of hers to any cousins I have (except her engagement ring MRB center stone that I would turn into a pendant). The few pieces she has that I love, are really already mine. They were passed down to her to from my grandmother specifically to give to me, the only granddaughter. But none of them are diamonds. So this is really the only heirloom old cut diamond in the family. So its special to me because of that.

If I were to spend the kind of money that it would cost to buy that Singlestone ring, there are many other things I would prefer.

I like the idea of asking her to borrow it for a special occasion. I've borrowed some of her pieces before. Like I said she has gorgeous pieces.

And no, I don't have a picture of that ring. It didn't occur to me to take pictures in the bank.

I do have pictures of something else of hers that is serious eyecandy.

It's a high carat gold (22kt) gold suite with enameling she bought at an auction. Belonged to royalty (not kidding).

This is the reason we went to the safety deposit box, to return these to it.

It's a bib necklace, a wide bracelet, dangle earrings and a ring.

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Close up of necklace

 

[jordyonbass]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

I would say to her 'A ship is safest when it is in the harbour but that is not what it is designed for'

Then start arranging a time to meet up and borrow it

 

[rainwood]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

There's really only 1 sensible course of action. Hire the Oceans Eleven gang to liberate it from the safe deposit box. Your aunt will never know. And say hi to George Clooney for me!

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

There's really only 1 sensible course of action. Hire the Oceans Eleven gang to liberate it from the safe deposit box. Your aunt will never know. And say hi to George Clooney for me!

FINALLY! Someone with a sensible suggestion!

Love it!

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

I would say to her 'A ship is safest when it is in the harbour but that is not what it is designed for'

Then start arranging a time to meet up and borrow it

I'll probably be back in LA in a couple months.

I'll have to see if Brad Pitt will take the job.

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

I would ask to borrow it to have it "baptised" at a jeweler and released from all evil and wrongdoings tied to it.

I actually did suggest that if she wanted to, she could send it to Singlestone for a nice spa visit. I don't think she's going to do that though.

 

[rainydaze]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Sisterhood of the traveling pants (ring)! It needs to go from good home to good home collecting positive karma... and if it so happens to make it's final destination *your* finger, with all it's positive karma, well gee whiz!

 

[Gypsy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Sisterhood of the traveling pants (ring)! It needs to go from good home to good home collecting positive karma... and if it so happens to make it's final destination *your* finger, with all it's positive karma, well gee whiz!

You volunteering as a stop on the positive karma train?

 

[missy]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Gypsy, you never know. My mom and dad totally surprised me when they gave me the Cartier black opal. They knew how I much I loved that ring but I never in a million years thought they would just give it to me like they did. That ring sat in their safety deposit box at the bank vault for years and then their fort knox like home safe (it's a bigger and heavier safe than me lol) when they stopped keeping anything at the bank. Through the years I occasionally asked to borrow it for special occasions (like once every 2 years really infrequently) which they happily let me do. I never asked to keep the ring and then one day it was like here you go. I'm not wearing it and as long as you will wear and enjoy the ring we want you to have it. Knock me over with a feather.

So I share the experience because perhaps your aunt's wheels are turning and she might decide if you appreciate and love it to give it to you sooner than expected...

And there's the case of my grandmother's ring (Bea's inspiration). A ring I love and covet (it is not a good quality diamond at all but it represents someone very special to me-my grandmother and that is the reason I cherish that ring) but my mom refuses to let me wear it now. Before I got engaged she used to let me borrow it all the time but wouldn't give it to me. That's the one ring I actually asked to keep but she said no though she never wears it herself. And then when I got engaged she stopped letting me borrow it. So go figure.

While I would never ask your aunt to give you the ring now I might comment from time to time if I were you about how much you love and adore that piece and other complimentary and true comments about how you feel about the ring when it comes up naturally in the conversation. Not sucking up but just sharing your thoughts about how you love the ring.

Gorgeous jewelry Gyspy. Wow. Thank you for sharing.

 

[chrono]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Forget the rose cut diamond, give me the bib and set!

 

[susief]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

Ah that makes sense Gypsy (about you liking it because it's hers).

I agree with Missy that now she has seen your reaction, she will know you want it and the wheels may be turning. It's a lot to offer someone on the spot but I have an inkling that when you see her in future she just might have a surprise for you...

If not, and you just want advice about breaking into safety deposit boxes, these guys were pretty decent (until they got caught):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hatton_Garden_safe_deposit_burglary

 

[monarch64]

Re: Tongue firmly in cheek... a politically incorrect thread

She knows you love it, I'm sure there's no doubt in her mind about that. I am thinking realistically that you might send her a nice card/note telling her how much you appreciate being able to go with her to visit that ring and how extraordinary you thought it was, and that you're happy she has kept such an exquisite piece in the family despite it having been attached to a previous marriage (or whatever, you'd have to word that carefully.) And I'd leave it at that. She will "get it."