Time from acquiring a ring till the proposal?

[HappyNewLife]

I should have my GF's ring in a couple weeks, but won't give it to her until she proposes to me (long story, lol, we are a same-sex couple). Gives me time to pay it off

 

[HopeDream]

It was 20 Days between when the ring arrived and when DH proposed.

He wanted to take it home to show his friends and family, and then we both had super busy schedules, so the proposal got delayed until a random Thursday when we both had time and took a beautiful walk along the river. It was not a surprise proposal, but the way he asked still melts my heart when I think about it.

 

[MMtwo]

About 2.5 weeks for me.

 

[Zizzy]

Is it the norm in the US for you both to know there's an engagement ring but still await a proposal? How does it work?
In the UK, the tradition was for the proposal to be a surprise for the woman and for the man to have bought the ring and propose with it. Increasingly however, the man will propose and then they will go ring shopping together but I've never heard of the ring being bought and with the girl's knowledge and even input without a proposal from the man. Do you pretend that it's just a ring when choosing it or is it a question of "if I got married this would be my dream ring"? Otherwise surely the cat's out of the bag if you're ring engagement ring shopping; you've effectively had the proposal and agreed.
Is it that "the proposal" has become sort of detached and like a separate ritual rather than really popping the question? I suppose that fits with people increasingly doing it publicly.
Out of my friends, more than half were proposed to with a ring entirely chosen by their fiancé, my ex-husband proposed first and we went ring shopping a couple of weeks later.
It does sound like the US is different from the UK, another difference is that ER upgrades are still very rare here, so a wealthy woman with beautiful jewellery will still wear the tiny diamond chip in gold on her left hand that was all her OH could afford when they married.
I'm very jealous of the craftsmanship American women have access to and the availability of stunning diamonds. I've only once or twice seen a ring in the flesh like many posted on here, and many of our friends are very wealthy (not all!).
Anyone here from other countries? Are traditions different where you come from?

 

[HopeDream]

Hi Zizzy,
In the US/Canada, a surprise proposal with the ring chosen entirely by the man is still the norm 80% of the time, but usually there has been some kind of a conversation beforehand about the relationship being serious and the two possibly having a future together.

Sometimes, If the girl thinks the relationship has a future, she may choose a ring style on her own initiative and tell a friend or close family member about her taste in ring style (Some women pick out a dream ring before they're even in a relationship). Then it's up to the boyfriend to contact the friend/close family member and get the details.

Alternatively, sometimes the guy will propose with a family heirloom he's been given.

If the couple has good communication skills, and the girl doesn't like the surprise proposal ring, the couple will change it after the proposal (but not that often).

Probably about 20% of the time the guy will propose without a ring and then the couple will go shopping together.

Upgrades are not the norm at all, and many women keep the same tiny e-ring they were proposed to even if they become millionaires later on. Sometimes women will pick out a big fancy ring as and anniversary present for a significant anniversary, however.

PS is kind of it's own planet with women picking out their own rings and upgrading at the drop of a hat. Keep in mind that this community is a small community with a jewellery obsession, and not representative of the population as a whole.

 

[random_thought]

2 weeks here as well. However, we moved on a pretty fast timeline 6 months of dating before we got engaged, a year of being engaged before marriage and now we are coming up on our 5 year anniversary! Time flies after you get that pretty on your finger

 

[msop04]

About 1-2 weeks... and every day killed me to not have it!!

 

[jaysonsmom]

1 hour! He actually proposed without a ring, and we went ring shopping the following weekend.

From the time I choose the diamond and setting, we waited 1 hour for the ring to be set (while we watched) and the minute I got into the car, he dropped on one knee in the parking lot, re-proposed and put the ring on my finger.

 

[Jumpin_Jacks]

Damn, finally engaged!! Ring purchased early 2013 and engaged Oct 2014 I knew we were going to get engaged, just a matter of him settling into his new job and just DOING it, hahah. Now the trial and tribulations of wedding planning!!

 

[manderz]

Hubs had my ring for 8 months before I proposed to him

 

[CRYSTAL24K]

Hubby bought the diamond about 5 -6 months before he proposed. He must have had the diamond set about 2-3 months before he proposed.

 

[ipodobe]

I think it was around two months. I didn't know he had the ring, and he carried around with him during some of our dates...waiting for the right moment! Clearly he was particular about "the moment!" It was worth waiting for.

 

[islandmouse]

About 1-2 weeks... and every day killed me to not have it!!

1-2 weeks?! wow. I wish that were the same for me. Ring arrived a month ago and I've been literally drooling until the day he gives it to me (some time in March). Thank goodness February is a "short" month, but it feels like freaking forever... It's not even in our house because he thinks I would "peek." (I haven't seen it finalized.) He's probably right.

 

[StarWarsChick]

Took mine about 1 1/2 months but I believe he would have waited longer had my best friend not strongly encouraged him to wait anymore.

 

[Stalecupcake]

......SINCE OCTOBER 2014 when we selected our diamond (with the help of PS from WhiteFlash whom were so awesome)!!

The waiting is so hard. Seriously why doesn't he just ASK already?!

 

[4ever]

Bit of a late reply here from a former LIW;
I just looked back at my old posts to work it out, but I think we had the ring for about 2 years before getting engaged.
DH claims he knew almost instantly that we would get married one day, where as I was a lot more cautious/ a huge comitaphobe. It probably didn't help that he is 8 years older than me and I didn't want to rush into anything. Anyway, he had just convinced me to start looking at rings and we found The one right away and it was a good deal. So we just bought it. However there were a few things I needed to accomplish before getting engaged; graduate from Uni, get a full time job and for DH and I to get our own place together.
We got there eventually, at which point DH had a specific proposal date in mind and drove me round the bend waiting for him to finally pop the question!
So yep, I've been there!

 

[partgypsy]

Negative 1 1/2 months? He proposed and then we looked (antique stores primarily). I would like the setting of a ring but not the stone, or vice versa. Ended up choosing a stone (emerald) and having the store set it, which took a few days. He let me wear it as soon as he got it back from the jeweler's. The place is now closed but it was a really neat place, a small jewelry store focusing on antique and estate jewelry. They had all kind of amazing rings beyond our price range. I still remember this large ruby ring I spotted from across the room, so I walked over to get a closer look, which they obliged. Not even that big of a fan of ruby but this one was stoplight glowing red. I was afraid to ask the price!

And got married about a month later. It sounds rushed reading this but we were together for 5 years before this happened.

 

[16ocean]

5 months!

thrilled thrilled thrilled when he proposed