I''m new to this site, while I have been reading posts for a few weeks I finally sumed up the courage to post. Sorry, this is going to long:
At age 24 I fell in love with a man. He seemed to be perfect in every way. At age 26 we got engaged and he bought a house, which we moved into. Now, my family loved this man, he was rich, handsome, personable- just every thing a woman could want, almost. This man insisted that I not work (I have no education other than highschool) and enjoy life to the fullest. He took me everywhere I had ever dreamed of going, bought me everything I''d ever wanted and more, including an amazing 4ct. engagment ring. Now, don''t get me wrong, I loved this man for who he was, not what he had. I didn''t even find out until 6 mo. into our relationship that he was so well off. Anyways, I stayed at home took care of the house, which I might add was a full time job in its own. He didn''t even like me doing that and wanted to get a maid, but I insisted that I must do something to make up for everything he''d given me. Life was perfect, not only was I engaged and in love with the man of my dreams but I had more than I ever thought possible. We were going to be married in a year, and I started wedding planning. Well, not even six mo. into the engagment I found out he was seeing someone else. This killed part of me, I could have just died. I didn''t know what to do, so I talked to my parents. They told me that this man had done something amazing for them, and that was to give me the life they could not. They also told me that I''d be a fool to leave him, and just to talk to him, but not get too upset, for that might scare him away. So I did just that, except for the getting upset part, I couldn''t help but be a wreck! He told me that he decided an open relationship would be best for us, but he still wanted to get married. Once married, he explained that we would have an open marriage as well. He told me he thought I was okay with it. I was anything but "okay" with it. After days and days of fighting and pleading, he finally laid down the law. I was told that if I couldn''t live with his lifestlye choices to get out, and that he didn''t want to hear another word out of my mouth about it. He also said that he was a grown man and he''d do as he pleased and no woman was gonna stop him. I couldn''t believe this was happeneing... everything just crashed down around me. I went to my family again, asking for support and answers. My parents basically said this is the price you must pay for having everything you do. I couldn''t believe this either, my own parents where telling me just to live with it. After weeks of living with this man while he was sleeping with someone else, I just couldn''t stand it. I didn''t want to even see him, letalone marry him, and my life was falling apart. I was a mess. I get the nerve up and left him. He tried to get me back a few times, always saying that he loved me, but he couldn''t change. Finally, after a long struggle, I was free of him. Having nothing to my name, except the ring which he so generously let me keep, I moved back in with my parents, who were, at the least, upset with the choice I had made, they would barely even talk to me.
Time went by and I found myself dateing again, only to find my current b/f. Now, I took this relationship extremely slow, not wanting to make any of the same mistakes. This man is not rich like my ex, but he had a nice house, and a great heart, we fell in love and I ended up moving in with him after we had been together for three years. My parents hated him because they thought he was not as good as my first husband, and they hated me for loving him. When he asked me to move in, my parents told me that if I leave to go with this man that they didn''t want to hear from me anymore, and not to even think of them as family. So, I did some thinking. I realized that if my parents are treating me this way, they cannont truely want whats best for me, so I went with my b/f. I have been living with him for over a year now, and things where going great. He has a good job, so I''ve just been working as a volunteer at the animal shelter, as well as having a part time job. We''ve talked about getting engaged, and I started to get anxious a few months ago...
So, I had been saving up since I moved in w/ him to get him this surrond sound system he really wanted. Three weeks ago I finally had enough money and I got the system, I was going to hang the littler speakers in the back of the game room and needed some tools, I went downstairs and started to look through his toolbox, when I came across a little box. I opened the box and inside was a ringbox which held a beautiful engagment ring, along with a piece of folded up paper, I unfolded the paper and it read: "Since you''ll be accompanying me next weekend I thought you''d like to have something nice to show off, how''s a finace sound?" My heart stoped beating.. I was so excited!! I couldn''t believe that my dreams were finally coming true! I qucikly put back the ring right where it was and decided to let him go get me the stuff from downstairs when he got home. I had no idea what "next weekend was" but I thought it must me some romantic trip he had planned, and I awaited anxiously for him to invite me... it never happened. "Next weekend" he told me he had to go on a business trip, and he was gone the whole time. At first I thought that the business trip came up, therefore he had to extend his proposal, but now I know the truth, there''s someone else. I went back while he was gone over that weekend and checked, no ring. I searched everywhere, no ring. Now, he''s hardly ever home anymore I know there''s someone else, but I''m just so scared to go through the same thing again. I mean I can''t go back to my parents, they wonl''t even answer my calls, I have no money, no place to live, a terrible job that I just used as means to keep me occupied, and no education. I am trapped. But worst of all I''m loosing the man I truely love for the second time!!!! I can''t even cry anymore, I''m so lost. I just needed someone to talk to, I don''t have any friends anymore. Lost them when I got engaged to my ex. ANy advice out there, I''d love to hear...
At age 24 I fell in love with a man. He seemed to be perfect in every way. At age 26 we got engaged and he bought a house, which we moved into. Now, my family loved this man, he was rich, handsome, personable- just every thing a woman could want, almost. This man insisted that I not work (I have no education other than highschool) and enjoy life to the fullest. He took me everywhere I had ever dreamed of going, bought me everything I''d ever wanted and more, including an amazing 4ct. engagment ring. Now, don''t get me wrong, I loved this man for who he was, not what he had. I didn''t even find out until 6 mo. into our relationship that he was so well off. Anyways, I stayed at home took care of the house, which I might add was a full time job in its own. He didn''t even like me doing that and wanted to get a maid, but I insisted that I must do something to make up for everything he''d given me. Life was perfect, not only was I engaged and in love with the man of my dreams but I had more than I ever thought possible. We were going to be married in a year, and I started wedding planning. Well, not even six mo. into the engagment I found out he was seeing someone else. This killed part of me, I could have just died. I didn''t know what to do, so I talked to my parents. They told me that this man had done something amazing for them, and that was to give me the life they could not. They also told me that I''d be a fool to leave him, and just to talk to him, but not get too upset, for that might scare him away. So I did just that, except for the getting upset part, I couldn''t help but be a wreck! He told me that he decided an open relationship would be best for us, but he still wanted to get married. Once married, he explained that we would have an open marriage as well. He told me he thought I was okay with it. I was anything but "okay" with it. After days and days of fighting and pleading, he finally laid down the law. I was told that if I couldn''t live with his lifestlye choices to get out, and that he didn''t want to hear another word out of my mouth about it. He also said that he was a grown man and he''d do as he pleased and no woman was gonna stop him. I couldn''t believe this was happeneing... everything just crashed down around me. I went to my family again, asking for support and answers. My parents basically said this is the price you must pay for having everything you do. I couldn''t believe this either, my own parents where telling me just to live with it. After weeks of living with this man while he was sleeping with someone else, I just couldn''t stand it. I didn''t want to even see him, letalone marry him, and my life was falling apart. I was a mess. I get the nerve up and left him. He tried to get me back a few times, always saying that he loved me, but he couldn''t change. Finally, after a long struggle, I was free of him. Having nothing to my name, except the ring which he so generously let me keep, I moved back in with my parents, who were, at the least, upset with the choice I had made, they would barely even talk to me.
Time went by and I found myself dateing again, only to find my current b/f. Now, I took this relationship extremely slow, not wanting to make any of the same mistakes. This man is not rich like my ex, but he had a nice house, and a great heart, we fell in love and I ended up moving in with him after we had been together for three years. My parents hated him because they thought he was not as good as my first husband, and they hated me for loving him. When he asked me to move in, my parents told me that if I leave to go with this man that they didn''t want to hear from me anymore, and not to even think of them as family. So, I did some thinking. I realized that if my parents are treating me this way, they cannont truely want whats best for me, so I went with my b/f. I have been living with him for over a year now, and things where going great. He has a good job, so I''ve just been working as a volunteer at the animal shelter, as well as having a part time job. We''ve talked about getting engaged, and I started to get anxious a few months ago...
So, I had been saving up since I moved in w/ him to get him this surrond sound system he really wanted. Three weeks ago I finally had enough money and I got the system, I was going to hang the littler speakers in the back of the game room and needed some tools, I went downstairs and started to look through his toolbox, when I came across a little box. I opened the box and inside was a ringbox which held a beautiful engagment ring, along with a piece of folded up paper, I unfolded the paper and it read: "Since you''ll be accompanying me next weekend I thought you''d like to have something nice to show off, how''s a finace sound?" My heart stoped beating.. I was so excited!! I couldn''t believe that my dreams were finally coming true! I qucikly put back the ring right where it was and decided to let him go get me the stuff from downstairs when he got home. I had no idea what "next weekend was" but I thought it must me some romantic trip he had planned, and I awaited anxiously for him to invite me... it never happened. "Next weekend" he told me he had to go on a business trip, and he was gone the whole time. At first I thought that the business trip came up, therefore he had to extend his proposal, but now I know the truth, there''s someone else. I went back while he was gone over that weekend and checked, no ring. I searched everywhere, no ring. Now, he''s hardly ever home anymore I know there''s someone else, but I''m just so scared to go through the same thing again. I mean I can''t go back to my parents, they wonl''t even answer my calls, I have no money, no place to live, a terrible job that I just used as means to keep me occupied, and no education. I am trapped. But worst of all I''m loosing the man I truely love for the second time!!!! I can''t even cry anymore, I''m so lost. I just needed someone to talk to, I don''t have any friends anymore. Lost them when I got engaged to my ex. ANy advice out there, I''d love to hear...