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Is reverse-DSS a real thing?

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
1,118
I have a lovely, huge, blingy 3 stone (1.92tcw, 1.28 center .33 sides H/VS1 approx) on a size 5 finger. The center is an OEC and the sides were custom cut to match. I have no complaints about my ring, it's exactly what I asked for two years ago.

But it just seems so...big? I don't know. It's easily the largest of anyone I meet day to day. My first day on the new job in August, people were talking about it. I notice people watching my ring under the lights in meetings.

I've started to have fantasies of a small, maybe .50, ct solitaire on a delicate band that's really elegant and understated. Am I crazy? I saw a .54 Tiffany Novo on ebay and just about died, I loved it AND it is so low profile, it looks really comfortable and easy to wear. Has anyone else downsized and not regretted it? I'd be keeping this ring, so I'd still have a wall of bling if I wanted it someday.

Anyone have suggestions for a really refined setting that would flatter a .4-.5 stone on a smaller finger? Budget no real object at that size. And maybe suggestions for a really fabulous small stone?

This is my current ring:

y5wD0k3l.png
 

Travelgal

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Dec 12, 2013
Messages
332
OMG- your ring is fabulous! It's really pretty. That said, if it's larger than your social circles or you feel uncomfortable wearing it to work, there is nothing wrong with getting another ring that you wear as an alternative. I have a travel/alternate ring that I wear when I meet clients for the first time and when I know the situation calls for a more modest ring. My significant other doesn't mind that I rotate my rings, but I would definitely talk to yours to make sure there aren't any hurt feelings as some people are very sensitive.

Have you seen Niel's post for rings under $5k? There are some great examples:
[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/show-me-your-e-rings-under-5k.184135/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/show-me-your-e-rings-under-5k.184135/[/URL]
 

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
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My other half is fine with it, beyond thinking that I'm crazy -- "What girl wants a SMALLER diamond?"

He got to impress his friends and family with this one (I've had it two years now) so he doesn't mind if I get something smaller as long as I wear the "official" on to holidays and special events.

I saw the under $5k thread but a lot of it seemed to be focused on getting the BIGGEST stone for $5k which is not really the direction I was hoping to go...
 

Niel

Super_Ideal_Rock
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20,044
kb1gra|1420488733|3812188 said:
My other half is fine with it, beyond thinking that I'm crazy -- "What girl wants a SMALLER diamond?"

He got to impress his friends and family with this one (I've had it two years now) so he doesn't mind if I get something smaller as long as I wear the "official" on to holidays and special events.

I saw the under $5k thread but a lot of it seemed to be focused on getting the BIGGEST stone for $5k which is not really the direction I was hoping to go...

I think there is a place for large and a place for small.

II luuurv antique diamond rings. They have history and they somehow look perfect with half ct diamonds.

I'd get one if I were you. I mean, depending on where you find it it wouldn't be that much. And just tell your hubby that it makes your other ring look bigger after wearing it a while lol
 

elle_chris

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
3,504
There are times when I feel uncomfortable wearing my ring as well. I also have a rather large 5 stone that I don't wear at all anymore because it's just so over the top (I think) that I feel ridiculous wearing it with my lifestyle.

When I don't wear my e-ring, I just stack various bands or wear my wedding band alone.

The ring I'm about to link isn't exactly what you're looking for, but man is it gorgeous and would look amazing and unique stacked with a thin eternity.

It's a ring coatimundi had made for her mom years ago. I still love it today and one day, hope to have something similar made in platinum
here's the link, scroll down for the pic. I think this/or similar designs really highlight smaller diamonds.

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-27']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-27[/URL]
 

dk168

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 7, 2013
Messages
12,492
I do not feel comfortable wearing my 1.19ct EC that was my 40th birthday present to myself to work on a daily basis, and had another ring made with an EC that is 0.48ct that I feel is more appropriate for daily work wear.

I wear the larger EC for dressier events whenever I can.

DK :))
 

Texas Leaguer

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jul 27, 2009
Messages
3,760
Certainly you need to be comfortable. However, the reason people may be fixated on your ring may NOT be size...

Many people are not used to seeing nice OEC diamonds. They do some unique things with light. It could be they are mesmerized by the large colored sparkles that it produces, which can be observed from quite some distance.

And would'nt it be a shame to deprive them of enjoying something so magical :wink2:
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Apr 30, 2005
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33,225
I wore a 2.26 ct asscher for years.
Now I wear a 1.51 and though I swapped for the cut, and at the time wanted a 2+ ct in the Octavia design, I now prefer the smaller size.

I'm less self-conscious wearing the smaller rock.
Sure, I'd prefer the appearance of a 5 ct diamond itself, but part of the experience is how you feel in public wearing it.

If you feel happy wearing a large stone then that's perfect for you.
I'm sure there are some who'd feel uncomfortable wearing anything over half a carat, or smaller.
 

Mayk

Ideal_Rock
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Feb 12, 2011
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I often switch to stacking bands when I want to be understated... But I see nothing wrong with having a smaller e-ring. More options! :appl:
 

derbygal

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 15, 2010
Messages
2,182
Love your ring (and your nails!). I really think the size looks great on your hand. :dance:
 

LLJsmom

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Oct 24, 2012
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12,633
I've had my VC ring now for over a month and I find my stone a little big sometimes. It's not because of what people around me wear. It just looks Big to me. But I'm definitely comfortable with it. ;-). I think having an alternative ring is a great idea! Go for it.
 

Travelgal

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Dec 12, 2013
Messages
332
Do you want modern or vintage? You said Tiffany novo, so I am thinking you are leaning towards modern. What shape for center stone?
 

Zizzy

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jun 10, 2014
Messages
173
Wow! First of all I love your existing ring. However of you really want a smaller, low profile alternative and budget isn't a big issue, why not treat yourself to a 0.75-ish Tiffany Novo since you liked it? I don't normally suggest branded high end stores because of the big premium you pay, but your case sounds like a prime candidate. The Novo is a lovely setting and you could run the diamonds Tiffany offer through the HCA and past the experts here on Pricescope.
I was bewitched by a beautifully set MRB on a plain white gold/platinum band with a plain wedding band worn by my daughter's OT the other day. The diamond looked around 0.5 and the proportions of the rings and the sparkle were exquisite. Unfortunately I don't know her well enough to ask about it.
Whichever way you go keep us posted and happy hunting!
 

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
1,118
Travelgal|1420497953|3812257 said:
Do you want modern or vintage? You said Tiffany novo, so I am thinking you are leaning towards modern. What shape for center stone?

I could really go either way. Before I was given this ring, I had only tried on a few and the novo is what had stood out to me. The proportions of the .54 I saw on ebay just kind of spoke to me, but I'm not married (heh) to that style. It's on ebay for $3750 which is pretty reasonable...

Something like a little tiffany Bezet would be okay with me, so I guess my taste does lean more modern. The setting for the OECs I have now is a modern trellis and is contemporary, but if I found the perfect vintage ring or set I'd be fine with that too.

I think the more important part is the band width (1.8-2.2mm is flattering on me, the super skinny bands don't look quite right) and the low setting height, I think. You guys are more skilled at finding really special pieces than I am.

If I had to set a budget, given that it's going to be a much smaller stone, I'd say $8k would probably be the top but could maybe put in a bit more for the right piece.

I'm definitely open to an eternity band but I have just never seen a setting that really spoke to me and I'm wary of getting one custom made and not liking it, then being stuck with it.
 

iota15

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 19, 2010
Messages
1,278
Love you current ring, but I understand wanting to be understated sometimes.

I have a 0.1 carat solitaire in a half yellow gold bezel that I wear sometimes in place of the e-ring. It's a cutie patootie.

I'm comfortable with the size of my current e-ring in pretty much all settings that don't involve dirt. BUT, it's nice to have something to switch it up once in a while.

So what are you thinking? A cushion? More old cut stones?

little_guy_spark.jpg
 

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
1,118
my "heart piece" if you will, the ring I regret walking away from, was a .5something (I want to say .58?) OMC in a beautiful, really fine halo. The stone was a super low color, something like an M? with a big pillowy crown. Was gorgeous. The setting alone was something like $5k and the ring was completely incompatible with my life (I'm pretty outdoorsy, so delicate pave is not for me-- especially if the whole point of trading down is to wear it more...) so I walked away from it and probably still would because I'd be forever worrying about damage.

Cross Jewelers has something really appealing, but the price is appalling for what you get...something like $4k and it's .7 total weight (3 20 pointers and some little melee). But again, I am wary of custom and then being stuck with it if I don't love it, so I don't want to have someone else make a similar piece.

When we originally looked at rings, the other piece that "spoke" to me had a .44 center. I do think he got "bigger is better" itis and now that his sister is engaged and has her ring (my fiance frequently says mine is "better" even though I don't care) the ring-pissing-match is over and now I can pursue getting something that is more me. I don't fault him for buying what he bought, my ring is BEAUTIFUL and very special and he put a ton of effort and a lot of money into it-- but I often feel that he bought it for what other people feel about it, instead of what I feel about it.

That AVR is really interesting. That would look really nice in a little rose gold bezel.

This all started when I found out the other women at work were gossiping about my ring, and I have noticed people in meetings watching my hands. It really is a special piece but it's not the kind of attention I want.

Maybe an eternity band is a good compromise. I do still like shiny things but somehow the eternity bands aren't quite so "in your face" if I could find one I really liked.
 

arkieb1

Ideal_Rock
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May 11, 2012
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9,786
I love your ring. A self confessed size w@#%* I love larger diamonds. But I understand where you are coming from. It's totally acceptable to have more than one ring, a good ring for going out dressing up and just because and a more practical every day ring that can be worn in place of or as a right hand ring when you choose.
 

Calliecake

Ideal_Rock
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This all started when I found out the other women at work were gossiping about my ring, and I have noticed people in meetings watching my hands. It really is a special piece but it's not the kind of attention I want. [/quote]


Your ring is gorgeous and looks beautiful on your hand. I understand you need to do what makes you feel comfortable. I just want to give you something to think about. Please don't let the opinions of others bother you. When I was young and newly married we lived in a new subdivision where most of the neighborhood was the same, young, newly married, young families. One of the girls who had been living with her boyfriend got engaged and her fiancé gave her a beautiful family diamond. His dad was a jeweler. The diamond was over three carats, G color, VS1. It was one of the most beautiful diamonds I had ever seen and at the time, probably the largest. I have never seen so many young women bitten by the green eyed monster in my life. They made the cattiest remarks and never even congratulated the girl with the ring. She came to me a week later and thanked me for being happy for them and telling her that her ring was beautiful. She had considered these women her friends and was so hurt by their reactions. Everyone woman in the neighborhood knew she had a beautiful ring. They would have traded rings in a heartbeat if given the chance.

The gossip is jealousy talking and they would not be staring at your ring if it was not beautiful.
 

Gypsy

Super_Ideal_Rock
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40,225
Honey, your ring is gorgeous and honestly, not very big at all. Very nice sized. But NOTHING that should start rumors from anyone with any manners or self-confidence at all.

I would wear your ring, wear it every day and wear it proudly.

That said... if for some reason you don't think you can do this or you want to allow other people to dim your enjoyment of your gorgeous ring, then I suggest something like this: http://www.whiteflash.com/wedding-rings/seven-stone-shared-prong-diamond-wedding-band-567.htm or http://www.michaelcfina.com/engagement-wedding-rings/wedding-bands/memoire-platinum-7-stone-single-prong-band-PPSP7-34M.html?#

I have a 7 stone band that is very similar. I would get .75 or 1 ctw.

And that way you can wear your engagement rings on weekends and evenings and special occasions and wear the band for your days at work.

But HONESTLY for your own sake, I wouldn't let them taint your enjoyment and I would just straighten my spine if I think someone is talking about me, and know it is a reflection on THEM, not on YOU, in any way shape or form.
 

Asscherhalo_lover

Ideal_Rock
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I would just wear a wedding band to tone down the bling. I have lots of bands to chose from depending on what I'm feeling that day :)
 

canuk-gal

Super_Ideal_Rock
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25,649
HI:

Thing is, even if you get another ring, there is no guarantee the gossip will stop. Unfortunately gossip happens--the ugly side of human nature. You've lived this experience already--something you posted about a "pissing match" ; in getting another ring you are allowing others, again, dictate your wedding jewellery. Ironic.

Please, don't let anyone else steal your joy!

Certainly get another ring. Or two. :bigsmile: :appl: But because YOU really want it.

cheers--Sharon
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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canuk-gal|1420517128|3812407 said:
HI:

Thing is, even if you get another ring, there is no guarantee the gossip will stop. Unfortunately gossip happens--the ugly side of human nature. You've lived this experience already--something you posted about a "pissing match" ; in getting another ring you are allowing others, again, dictate your wedding jewellery. Ironic.

Please, don't let anyone else steal your joy!

Certainly get another ring. Or two. :bigsmile: :appl: But because YOU really want it.

cheers--Sharon
Yup, and then shove it up their noses... :bigsmile:
 

mrs-b

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
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11,542
If it's really bothering you, it would probably help if you removed the side stones. Perhaps use them to make earrings? It's a win-win situation then.

I have a 2.15ct solitaire (my profile photo) and a .8 solitaire. I love both dearly. I have to say, tho, when I saw*this* ring, I just about dropped dead from jealousy!

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/mark-morrell-slim-petite-torchiere-with-0-5ct-whiteflash-aca.208844/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/mark-morrell-slim-petite-torchiere-with-0-5ct-whiteflash-aca.208844/[/URL]

I think the proportions of this are magnificent, and since your finger is a size larger than the young lady's in the photo, a .6ct diamond would probably give you the same effect. So - perhaps a back up and keep your ring as is?

One third suggestion would be to buy something in the .6ct range and take the side stones from your existing ring, and make a modest 3 stone. Then reset your current ring as a solitaire. Sort of the best of all worlds. :)

But I'd only do any of this if it suited YOU. Someone will always disapprove - no matter what you do. So do what suits you, and enjoy it. Good luck!
 

Circe

Ideal_Rock
Trade
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Messages
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It's one of the most interesting aspects of engagement rings to me: they're expected to be all things to all people under all circumstances at all times! NO PRESSURE, GUYS. No wonder so many people get in a tizzy during the initial buying process, wanting to get the "perfect" ring, if it's what they're going to be presenting to the world as a symbolic representation of values, aesthetics, standing, etc. FOREVAH.

Variety is the spice of life for a reason, I think: I like alternating my rings depending on the occasion, how I'm feeling that day, sentiment ... you name it. So I have a variety of eternity bands to keep things interesting, and at opposite ends of the scale, a nicely wonky 3.14 OMC in a Van Craeynest 1034 for days when I want to size queen it up, and a Van Craeynest 812 set with a half-carat AVC for days when I want to impersonate somebody elegant and low-key. (As you can guess, I've developed a slight addiction to VanC. And squared-off old cuts.) So my vote is to get something else, and then to enjoy both - as Canuk-Gal wisely says, it would be a pity to let them steal your pleasure in your ring! I'll keep an eye out for something nifty in that range ... but as an aside, if you want something delicate but deeply satisfying, I vote Van Craeynest. Aeolianarpa's 810 with a 1.1 carat AVC is one of the yummiest rings out there, I always thought .... [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/van-craeynest-810-gog-avc.150538/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/van-craeynest-810-gog-avc.150538/[/URL] ... pop the lovely D AVR that was posted above into one of those and you are set. :lickout:
 

sweetpea&babycorn

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
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Messages
1,077
canuk-gal|1420517128|3812407 said:
HI:

Thing is, even if you get another ring, there is no guarantee the gossip will stop. Unfortunately gossip happens--the ugly side of human nature. You've lived this experience already--something you posted about a "pissing match" ; in getting another ring you are allowing others, again, dictate your wedding jewellery. Ironic.

Please, don't let anyone else steal your joy!

Certainly get another ring. Or two. :bigsmile: :appl: But because YOU really want it.

cheers--Sharon

I'd agree with this. People will always find someone to gossip about, you can't please them all. What else will they have to say if you walk into work with an understated, yet NEW ring(s)?

My ring is by far the largest in my group of friends, co-workers, etc and I'm sure people do more than just wonder about our lifestyle. A grumpy crotchety nurse once asked me 1) exactly the carat size and 2) what my husband does to "afford such a big ring." She had balls. Luckily, nobody is as openly nosy as her. People more admire it and say it's beautiful than anything else.

MY ring is MY ring. It has a lot of emotional value to me and my husband has been extremely generous in making me 1000000% happy with it. If I picked a ring based on everyone else's approval I would probably end up with no ring at all! Why should I let someone who I don't particularly care about make me feel bad about wearing my ring? I acknowledge every day how luck I am to own something so beautiful, I work hard and focus on my job, am kind to everyone, and never show off my ring or talk about it unless others notice/ask. If people are going to judge me based on my ring, that is their problem. Be proud to wear your ring, it's SO beautiful and from your post, it seems like you really really love it.

*mic drop*
 

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
1,118
As an update, I decided that an eternity band would make me happy, so I bought a full eternity novo-style band:

http://www.bluenile.com/diamond-eternity-ring-platinum_12796?elem=img&track=product

and a small bezel set rb solitaire to wear when I'm feeling understated:

http://crossjewelers.com/products/product.aspx?ID=259

went a little over the budget but I feel I got bling, and understated, and a way to mix them all so I can have different levels of blinginess. I'm especially excited to try wearing the eternity with just my cartier trinity wedding band and seeing how that look feels to me.

Thanks everyone for your kind words. It really did help me decide to do something different, but only in a way I wanted to do it.
 

motownmama

Ideal_Rock
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Jan 9, 2008
Messages
8,207
post pictures when you get them!
 
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