Is this a wedding invitation faux pas?

[glaucomflecken]

Hi ladies!

When my friend got married a few years ago, her invitations had a school picture of her and the groom when they were like 7 on the front and then the inside of the card was the invite. I thought it was THEE cutest invitation ever and knew I wanted to do that. So we''ve been thinking of using our childhood pics on the invites too.

Then I read something posted on theknot.com by a knottie (something about 50 things all new knotties should know) and it said you should never ever have pictures of children on your invites unless you and the groom are 8 years old (ooh knotties can be mean sometimes).

Is there some kind of unspoken wedding law that says that this is tacky? I thought it was a cute idea but I wouldnt want my guests to think I was tacky!

Thanks!
Sarah

 

[MelissaSue]

glauckom - no.. its certainly not tacky.. I think that some people (like the mean knotties.. i saw that too) might think it is a little cheesy. but I think it really cute especially if it is them when they were children.. i have a lot of invites I like that have pics of little kids on them. I think they are super cute..

 

[Buena Girl]

Not engaged yet, so I have not really done any reaearch yet about invitation faux pas. But I just wanted to post that the knottie person has got to be wrong. How could something so special and meaningful be a faux pas?!?

Personally, I love the idea and I am so glad you posted it!!!

 

[Tybee]

Sarah,
I know very little about what''s right and wrong, but my FI and I were also thinking of using childhood pictures of ourselves, not for our invites, but for our save-the-dates. We''re planning a beach destination wedding, and our baby pictures are of us in bathing suits...they are super dated and we look ridiculous. It''s your wedding, shouldn''t you have fun?

 

[LollyBear]

I think it''s a great idea. I wanted to do that with my Save the Date cards using our First Communion photos (since we''re basically dressed like a little bride & groom) then sending a wedding photo as our Thank You card. That way you have a "then and now" feeling with the two. I was so sad that my FMIL doesn''t know where she has pictures of my FI and is completely unwilling to look.

I''ve had to give up the idea and find a new design since I need to get them out ASAP.

Point being, do what makes you happy!

Don''t let the naysayers get you down or make you second guess yourself. From what I''ve heard about the knotties, the majority sound like a bunch of vindictive bridezillas (pricescopers excluded of course). That is the last place I would go for advice.

I think using childhood photos it is such a sweet idea, and if other people can''t appreciate the sentiment then I feel sorry for them. I think you are fortunate to have the photos to share; I only wish I were as lucky.

It''s your day, make it special.

Natalie

 

[jenwill]

Those naughty Knotties! For shame, for shame!

My personal opinion, is that people get way too hung up on what is proper. Proper changes. It used to be proper to wear gloves and hats to church. Now, as long as it is presentable, wear what works for you.

Put your pics on the invites...add a little dash of personality to the day that is about the two of you!

 

[Gale]

It''s your engagement glaucomflecken (meanig you and your fiance), and your wedding, It belongs to no-one else. Do what makes your heart sing and your spirit fly. If having your childhood pictures on the invite does the trick, then do it! Your idea is as far from tacky as it gets. Your idea is sweet and sentimental. In a way it honours your whole history - you and your beloved as children, and now you and your beloved as adults making the ultimate committment to each other. Don''t let those with small spirits detract from your joy.

 

[elepri]

The only reason i can think of for not doing that is if you''re having a very formal, black-tie wedding. Then I guess it might give your guests the wrong idea about the level of formality But if not, you should do whatever you want.

 

[sparklish]

Gee, I tend to be likely to side with traditional etiquette even when lots of people don''t. But this rule, if it even exists, is silly! Why not put pictures of you both as kids? Invitations should by fun, unique and reflect you. I think it''s a cool idea, go for it.

 

[Alice in DiamondLand]

similar to the subject of this post:

I just started a new thread (todd and alice kid photos photoshopped onto bride/groom portrait) where we used kids photos.

 

[flopkins]

I just want to pipe in to say I agree w/everyone else, and the knottie must have had some agenda against some other knottie and probably made that list to hurt/piss someone off... Ignore them!!

 

[Gale]

glaucomflecken,

Yesterday we went to a really snotty stationery store in Toronto to look at invites for our wedding and a couple of parties we are going to throw. There were all kinds of invitations that offered the opportunity to have your childhood pictures on them. Wedding invitations, shower invitations, thank you cards...You name it. It was there. And in many different styles. Those people were just being spiteful.

 

[heart prongs]

I think they may have been talking about the "Precious Moment" invitations -- I''ve seen that list before!

Personally, I love the idea...esp. if you make the pictures look older...put those little corners on them or something. You''ll have to show us after you make them...

klr

 

[treysar]

WAIT A SEC! - that was MY Post! Not the mean comment, but the one about having a picture on the invitation - I was thinking of having a pic of me and FI on our invitation and they basically ripped my heaad off! (Actually, I said, "my friend" was thinking of doing it, but i meant ME, I just know that the trols can be awfully harsh on there. I had one girl say to me, "doesn''t the baby come AFTER the wedding? you look 9 motnhs pregnant in your bio". (BTW, not pregnant at all, she was calling me fat.) see what i mean? They are a trough bunch!

Anyway, I love th idea, it think it is VERY CUTE!

 

[babblingal]

Wow, sounds like a nottie needs some panties to go with her attitude! I realize I should not be shocked anymore by how people behave online, but honestly I still can''t help but shake my head at the lack of social skill some people demonstrate. I can hardly believe that had that woman seen you in public she would have immediately shared her opinion about your weight. Or maybe she has never gotten her foot that far into her mouth. I''m surprised her toes are not gagging her.

When I see people make those kind of posts on message boards, I think to myself "They have a sad life if all they can think to do is bully someone they don''t know."

Use the pictures, ignore the notties and enjoy your wedding.

 

[blueroses]

Date: 3/27/2005 1:13:24 PM
Author: treysar

I had one girl say to me, ''doesn''t the baby come AFTER the wedding? you look 9 months pregnant in your bio''.

My mouth literally dropped when I read this.
OH MY GOD!!!!!! That is absolutely unbelieveable! What a sad little small-minded vindictive WENCH!!!!

I am not engaged yet so I haven''t seen firsthand the nastiness of the knot, but I think I''m a little scared of them! Wow. I think if you want to use childhood pictures, more power to you.

 

[MelissaSue]

treysar - there is also a list in several people's bios on the knot about like.. how to behave on the knot or whatever.. and that thing is in there. Its not even necessarily the trolls, just some of the acutal posters who think they're extra hot shit.

ETA- Treysar - are you EVER gonna share your dress pics with the PSers?

 

[glaucomflecken]

hey girls! thanks for all the posts! You are all so right. I will do whatever I want!

I saw a few companies that can make these.

Elepri, I agree that it may be too informal for a black tie event. Our wedding won''t be formal at all, but not casual either. I want it to be beautiful yet light hearted.

Alice I LOVE those pics!!! i checked out that website and definitely I will consider those!

Treysar, I can''t believe how rude people are these days. Even in this day and age, we women still have battles to fight and its sad that most of the time its other women we are battling (such as knotties), trying to knock us down.

Pricescopers are the nicest bunch on the net! Never once in any of my posts on any forum has anyone ever said anything mean.

 

[fire&ice]

Date: 3/27/2005 1:13:24 PM
Author: treysar
WAIT A SEC! - that was MY Post! Not the mean comment, but the one about having a picture on the invitation - I was thinking of having a pic of me and FI on our invitation and they basically ripped my heaad off! (Actually, I said, ''my friend'' was thinking of doing it, but i meant ME, I just know that the trols can be awfully harsh on there. I had one girl say to me, ''doesn''t the baby come AFTER the wedding? you look 9 motnhs pregnant in your bio''. (BTW, not pregnant at all, she was calling me fat.) see what i mean? They are a trough bunch!

Anyway, I love th idea, it think it is VERY CUTE!

What is ironic about this is that the poster probably thinks they have all the right etiquette answers. People like her hide behind good manners as a way of feeling superior. When in fact, good manners should make everyone comfortable not uncomfortable. That is the primary reasons for etiquette.

F&I shaking her head chalking the meanie knots up to little snots trying to swing their *supposed* good breeding into some sort of virtue.

As to the invite, it goes to issue of what your demographic circle is used to (are they more informal in general) & as Elepri mentioned, it may not set the tone for a black tie and tails wedding. Reason being - think of your guests. If I received an invitation like this, I would think the wedding to be more informal (read how I dress into it) & "fun". Sounds like what you may want.

Quite frankly, I don''t think there is a right and wrong invitation. BUT - one must understand that the invite does set the tone for your guests.

Good luck with the planning!

 

[moremoremore]

Hmmmm. I'll fess up and admit that I absolutely hate the idea LOL...BUT it's not MY wedding and I def agree with what's been stated above....it's your day and if you want them...well, then you must have them! Go for it!

 

[Girls-best-friend]

I saw invites like this in an invite catalog a few years ago and also thought it was the cutest thing.
I have decided to use that idea with my engagement party invites. The wording on the invite I saw started out with " It took them a while to find each other but they finally did!" That will go on the front of the engagement invite.

I say go for it and ignore others. I signed up for the knot last year and never go there. The people there aren''t nice and the boards are much too hard to navigate. I prefer the WeddingChannel.com much easier to navigate and they have some really nice people.

 

[MINE!!]

I AM GOODNESS>> THAT IS SO CUTE!!

That is a great idea... I like it and I think that your guests would to. There is something timeless and sweet about finding your soulmate as a child. Just as with parenting, only take half the advice you hear and all the advice that you agree with.
Good luck to you!