looking for the right ring

[mhoway]

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 4 year and its time for me to ask her the big question. We have been living in Queens New York together for about 2 years now. I am a teacher and she is an actor. I am the quiet one and she is the happy social one. Some might call her a little hippy esk.
I am really exited about asking her but it turns out I have no idea what kind of ring she would want. I went through her rings that she has and over the year have talked about some of them. Her grandmother gave most of them to her. Which makes me thing she would want something antique. The rings are all different shapes and colors, so not much help there.
I contacted her sister and asked her for help, and over Thanksgiving she was able to get a lot of information about the kind of ring she would like. She found out that it should be antique and natural design, like filigree. White gold and central old-world style diamond--European cut with flat/wide facets. Some whimsy would be good.
I was given a diamond from my grandmother when she passed away my mother has been keeping a hold of it for me. I know the ring is not at all what she would like but I could still use the diamond if it is possible. I am trying to get some help with finding a jewelry maker/seller that fills this profile? Any help would be great.

 

[dtnyc]

Can you tell us more about the stone you have?
shape? size?

Personally, if you have a stone that you know you are already working with I would seek her input on the setting style. While she may have a lot of vintage rings from her grandmother, that might not be what she wants in an engagement ring that she will be wearing everyday. It sounds like most of those rings were likely gifted to her, so she hasn't had much say in them. Does she wear them frequently? What is the style of the ring that she wears most often?

Also keep in mind if you go with an antique or antique style engagement ring then you typically go w/ a coordinating wedding band.

I would probably try to engage in conversation about engagement ring style- if any of your friends are recently engaged or married I would ask her what she thinks of those rings. Especially ones w/ the same shape stone you have- so if you have a round, ask her, do you like rounds with side stones, or rounds with halos or rounds in vintage filigree settings?

I purchased our wedding bands from Leigh at Antiqueengagementrings.com - he is located in NYC and has both antique and vintage settings as well as reproduction settings. So if you end up going the antique (style) setting route he is someone to talk to.

 

[mhoway]

It would be very conspicuous to ask her about rings, let alone details like the set. Her sister confirmed that she would like an antique style. She does ware the rings that her grandmother gave her but they range is style so much. One is gold and on the small side, another is silver and has a large white flower on it. Theirs one ring that is silver with a round flat top that has smaller metal balls on it.

I attached pictures of the two rings that have been handed down to me. I still need to go to someone reliable and see what size and cut they are. I will check out antiqueengagementrings.com thanks for the help and is anything else comes to mind please let me know.

 

[dtnyc]

You are luckily in NYC so close to a lot of diamond and jewelry resources.
Personally I would start with the stones, get them looked at by an professional. David Wolf and Theordore Baer are 2 independent appraisers that come to mind. I know David Wolf is popular with Ps'ers in general and I had a good experience getting a full appraisal of my engagement ring w/ a transitional cut stone from him and he also gave me an informal appraisal/measurments on an Old Mine Cut stone in a ring I inherited.
I would want to know as much about the stones as possible before handing them over to a jeweler to be set, also I would want to know what kind of investment I would be willing to make in a setting.

Just Appraisers
David Wolf
555 Fifth Avenue
14th Floor
212-377-2090
[email protected]

Theodore M. Baer
608 Fifth Avenue
Suite 706
New York, NY 10020
212-245-6330
[email protected]

Lastly, I will say that I WISH my husband had asked me more questions about what I liked and if there was anything specific I wanted in a ring, besides simply stone shape and metal. He used a family stone and totally "surprised" me. And while my ring is beautiful it is set too high and isn't practical for daily wear. Eventually we will have the setting re-done but life gets in the way and between house and kids, etc. re-doing my e-ring at this point is a low priority. Though plenty of people change their rings around both before and after the wedding, it really is most cost effective to get it right the first time.

After 4 years the fact that you are thinking about proposing should not be a huge surprise to her. I would try and get some concrete /specific ideas of what she wants in a ring that she will hopefully be wearing on a daily basis for decades to come.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

You have received good advice about having the stones evaluated first before resetting them into a engagement ring. Once you have made a decision whether you want to use the stones for your intended new ring or for another piece of jewellery in the future, then you have many places near to you for setting choices!

Old World Diamonds is close to you, and has antique diamonds as well as settings (also reproductions/new) and might be a good resource. Single Stone is another resource (altho not close by!) but worth looking online for ideas.

Incidentally there is a list of vendors posted on this thread (at the top, "pinned") where you can look for Estate rings--if for no other reasons than to get setting ideas. I also concur with the above poster who suggested that "surprises" in rings--especially custom made rings that you might be leaning toward if you reuse your own stones--is challenging at best. Specific criteria are good!

Let us know what happens!

cheers--Sharon

 

[Wyntery]

Why not first have your grandmother's ring appraised and then propose with it? You can then work on the reset together.