shape
carat
color
clarity

Do I fire "my ring guy" ?

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
Hi everyone,

I've been working on acquiring an engagement ring for the last few months now. I have a (so I thought) trustworthy jeweler in my hometown and have been working with him on this. My cousins know him well and went to school with his daughters, my brother bought a ring from him, my other cousin brought a ring from him, etc. etc. I am truly in love with a setting that is his custom design...

I no long live in my hometown (not even my home state), and so have been working with him remotely to make this happen. I didn't think it much a problem, since I've been to jewelers and I honestly can't tell the difference between SI2 and VVS1, J color and G color. I was really all set to not fret, let him do all the work, and be happy with the results...

But being a mathematician by trade, diamond buying seems to much akin to a very interesting optimization problem to just ignore. When it seems we can quantify the qualitative... that's just too interesting to pass up.

The diamond he has recommended me has specs as follows.
It is EGL-USA certified, RBC diamond, 0.97ct, G, SI2, VG cut.
Polish and symmetry are VG.
His selling point is the dimensions (6.51 x 6.44 x 3.7) which make it appear much larger than a 0.97ct diamond.

The GIA cut calculator rates it as a GOOD cut.
The HCA rates it 4.5 and notes that there is a possibility of fish eye.

The jeweler assures me that it is eye clean and is not fish eye.

He wants $3200 for it and claims that this is just my "special customer" discount... and he would normally sell it for $5000. This sounds super suspicious to me. I've read enough from these forums to realize that this is not a good buy. Indeed, I've found a far superior diamond that's effectively the same size but is a GIA 3xEx and rates a 1.0 on HCA for $3800 on a website.

My question is, do I even continue to deal with this guy? It seems to me that similarly graded diamonds (once you account for the looser standards of EGL-USA grading) sell for $3000 - $3500, definitely not $5000. It feels like he is trying to manipulate me using the connections he has w/ my family. Instead of "giving me a deal" he is abusing my trust. I do love his setting, but what do you think? Do I try to find a different setting or do I trust him to enough to ship him a diamond and have him finish the ring?

Thanks, everyone, for your consideration of my dilemma,

Michael
 

JaneSmith

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 11, 2012
Messages
1,589
You are a mathematician, you have done the sums, you know the right answer.

Run for the hills!
 

webdiva

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
1,268
What does the setting look like? Is he open to taking outside stones?
 

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
webdiva -

Here is the setting:

3_45.jpg

Yes, the jeweler is definitely willing to take an outside diamond. I just feel after this exchange that he can't be trusted and I really don't want to deal with people who are not trustworthy.
 

webdiva

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
1,268
I can certainly understand that and feel the same way.

Looking at the design, Gabriel & Co have some similar shanks. You are aware that you can't put a wedding band flush with it, right? G & Co is happy to customize rings - both ID Jewelry and Good Old Gold carry this line and can order it for you. What parts of the ring do you absolutely love and must have? I see a surprise diamond on the side and sapphires as sidestones?

I'll do a quick search on www.gabrielengaged.com to see what they have.

What is your budget for the stone and setting?
 

decodelighted

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
11,534
Others may disagree but I'm not sure this guy is "untrustworthy" ... he might just not be an ace judge of stones. If you're really in love with a setting you can't get elsewhere -- maybe you should go ahead & get that one even if you get the stone elsewhere & even have it set elsewhere perhaps.

What constitutes a good deal & a good stone here at PS ... is very different than Mom & Pop retail shop in wherever. Retail prices are always higher in Brick & Mortar stores. Not every jeweler is selling super idealies. (Or thinks his customer wants that.)

Just my opinion. Good luck w/the search. Lots of good people on here to help source a stellar RB. (I'm not one of them though - Am an Asscher girl!)
 

webdiva

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
1,268
This is similar and you can see if G&Co or the vendor can change out the side stones to sapphires:
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER6022W44JJ
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER5842W44JJ
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7559W83JJ
I don't love the side, the one you posted looks more finished - but they may be able to change that or have something similar in their catalog.

here's one that's better: http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7546W44JJ

To put your mind at ease about custom making a ring... rings like this that they really are semi-custom and partially handmade, even though they are ordered from a manufacturer. My ring is from a similar manufacturer - Beverley K - and I love it. I went to many of the very high end jewelers in LA and am very happy with the quality. They rival anything from most jewelers (except maybe the super high end Victor Canera/Leon Mege's - which cost more than my entire ring).
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
33,852
ATLMikey|1343961090|3245188 said:
Hi everyone,

My question is, do I even continue to deal with this guy? It seems to me that similarly graded diamonds (once you account for the looser standards of EGL-USA grading) sell for $3000 - $3500, definitely not $5000. It feels like he is trying to manipulate me using the connections he has w/ my family. Instead of "giving me a deal" he is abusing my trust. I do love his setting, but what do you think? Do I try to find a different setting or do I trust him to enough to ship him a diamond and have him finish the ring?

Thanks, everyone, for your consideration of my dilemma,

Michael
rule #1...never to buy from a friend of a friend whose in the diamond business.
 

ViraLovesTiffanys

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2012
Messages
16
JP Diamonds has one similar, this is from their catalog if you want to see...

http://www.jpdiamondsinc.com/

jpenr7321cntr.jpg
jpenr7321.jpg unqenr7321.jpg

I fell in love with their black and white diamond cross that was on the facebook page, and the guy gave me a great deal! I think this is really close to what you want, maybe call to get a price?

this diamond cross has vs baguettes in it, I went crazy for it. $920! I can't believe the prices. The owner said he does engagement rings too but I have a gorgeous 4ct radiant cut so I think I'll pass on another stone.

crosses.jpg
 

ViraLovesTiffanys

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2012
Messages
16
I never shop from jewelry stores like that, people can be very manipulative. Its better to deal with people online or over the phone to feel out pricing before they think they've got you. I don't like the sound of this guy.
 

MissGotRocks

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 23, 2005
Messages
16,245
Run - he's not offering you a good deal. As Deco says, maybe he's not totally untrustworthy but just unknowing. I'm guessing that he's trying to push what he has. An EGL G SI2 is probably and I1 at best. No deal, no dice. You can find a similar setting or have one made.
I wouldn't let the setting be the dealbreaker.
 

Enerchi

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 4, 2011
Messages
10,658
Basically echoing all that others have previously advised - purchases made between friends/friends of the family/connections/'deals' - AREN'T!!

Best to thank him for his time and effort but you have decided to go a different route. EGL is not recommended if you are purchasing a modern RB. I'd suggest one of the recommended PS vendors and link them to the photo. Maybe there are settings they can get that would be the same/similar.

Please be cautious with your money - the man is in business to make money, not do favours for people.
 

ViraLovesTiffanys

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2012
Messages
16
Enerchi|1344002759|3245344 said:
Basically echoing all that others have previously advised - purchases made between friends/friends of the family/connections/'deals' - AREN'T!!

Best to thank him for his time and effort but you have decided to go a different route. EGL is not recommended if you are purchasing a modern RB. I'd suggest one of the recommended PS vendors and link them to the photo. Maybe there are settings they can get that would be the same/similar.

Please be cautious with your money - the man is in business to make money, not do favours for people.


Took the words out of my mouth
 

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
Thanks for the links, webdiva. gabrielny does have some REALLY beautiful settings. I like the one that you posted WITHOUT the sidestones the best actually. I'm starting to rethink everything.
 

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
ViraLovesTiffanys - This is also a nice setting. I am unable to find the JPDiamonds catalog online, though. Is it available?
 

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
Christina, I think those are both wonderful settings. A bit out of my budget, though. I need to keep the ring + stone < $5000...
 

webdiva

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
1,268
The best part is some of the vendors discount off of the MSRP - so GOG or IDJewelry can definitely get you something beautiful in your budget! :) I saw your BN thread and while you can get a great diamond there if you know what you're doing, I think that both GOG and IDjewelry are great for the service they provide and the upgrade policy.
 

Mikla

Shiny_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 28, 2012
Messages
473
Dancing Fire|1343967556|3245223 said:
ATLMikey|1343961090|3245188 said:
Hi everyone,

My question is, do I even continue to deal with this guy? It seems to me that similarly graded diamonds (once you account for the looser standards of EGL-USA grading) sell for $3000 - $3500, definitely not $5000. It feels like he is trying to manipulate me using the connections he has w/ my family. Instead of "giving me a deal" he is abusing my trust. I do love his setting, but what do you think? Do I try to find a different setting or do I trust him to enough to ship him a diamond and have him finish the ring?

Thanks, everyone, for your consideration of my dilemma,

Michael
rule #1...never to buy from a friend of a friend whose in the diamond business.

+1
 

MissElizabeth

Rough_Rock
Joined
Apr 27, 2012
Messages
57

Christina...

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,028
Mike, is the setting something that she picked out, and has her heart set on, or is it a style that you found and thought would be perfect? You mentioned that you are starting to rethink everything and I had a thought. How would you feel about finding the perfect diamond, and setting it in an inexpensive solitaire, then after the proposal the two of you could shop together for the perfect setting? This would take some of the pressure off from you now, and many women really like when they are able to be a part of the decision making process. Best of both worlds! =)

Can I ask how much you jeweler was willing to make the setting for?
 

TitanCi

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 23, 2012
Messages
738
^OP, to be frank.. Hell no. Don't deal with him anymore. I think you know the answer already. You already started looking here, used the GIA FW, and used the HCA. You're on the road to success in finding a BETTER stone, dude!
 

ViraLovesTiffanys

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 27, 2012
Messages
16
I had to request JP Diamonds to email me the catalog photos when I was looking for my cross, so I think that's your best bet. The direct email is

<[email protected]>

I'm sure he can send you the photos you'd like to look through
 

ATLMikey

Rough_Rock
Joined
Aug 2, 2012
Messages
9
Wow! So much activity in here since I last checked. I feel like you guys are working harder on the hunt than I am. It is much appreciated.

webdiva - you mentioned the possibility of vendors getting a discount off of msrp. Does that mean that I should contact someone at wf, ja, gog, or idjewelry (is that idjewelry.com or idjewleryonline.com; I've not seen this one mentioned before), give them an idea of what I am looking for, and see what setting they can provide? I looked through wf and ja, and didn't really see any settings that stood out. The ones your posted from gabrielny are all very nice if a little high. There was a more simple one for $875 (http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER8129W44JJ) that caught my eye and is leading the race at the moment.

Christina - The jeweler wants $1100 for the setting. The setting is not something she picked out nor is it something she has her heart set on. The style is something I think is perfect for her. She's extremely easy going and has pretty much said she'd be totally happy with a plastic ring from a gumball machine. Of course, I'm not going to do that to her. She's not very interested in shopping (for a ring) for herself. I think she'd feel a bit embarrassed. She trust's my tastes; especially in clothes and jewelry. The solitaire style is something she's actually quite opposed to. She doesn't like the appearance of many rings where the diamond almost feels like it is a separate entity from the ring. She wants something that flows well and integrates the centerstone into a piece.

ViraLovesTiffanys - That is a nice find and very similar. Unfortunately, it is a bit higher than the one I'm already looking at ($2000 vs. $1100). Also, I like the "peakboo bezel set" a lot. I didn't even know it was called that. :)
 

webdiva

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2011
Messages
1,268
ATLMikey|1344305017|3247128 said:
Wow! So much activity in here since I last checked. I feel like you guys are working harder on the hunt than I am. It is much appreciated.

webdiva - you mentioned the possibility of vendors getting a discount off of msrp. Does that mean that I should contact someone at wf, ja, gog, or idjewelry (is that idjewelry.com or idjewleryonline.com; I've not seen this one mentioned before), give them an idea of what I am looking for, and see what setting they can provide? I looked through wf and ja, and didn't really see any settings that stood out. The ones your posted from gabrielny are all very nice if a little high. There was a more simple one for $875 (http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER8129W44JJ) that caught my eye and is leading the race at the moment.

Christina - The jeweler wants $1100 for the setting. The setting is not something she picked out nor is it something she has her heart set on. The style is something I think is perfect for her. She's extremely easy going and has pretty much said she'd be totally happy with a plastic ring from a gumball machine. Of course, I'm not going to do that to her. She's not very interested in shopping (for a ring) for herself. I think she'd feel a bit embarrassed. She trust's my tastes; especially in clothes and jewelry. The solitaire style is something she's actually quite opposed to. She doesn't like the appearance of many rings where the diamond almost feels like it is a separate entity from the ring. She wants something that flows well and integrates the centerstone into a piece.

ViraLovesTiffanys - That is a nice find and very similar. Unfortunately, it is a bit higher than the one I'm already looking at ($2000 vs. $1100). Also, I like the "peakboo bezel set" a lot. I didn't even know it was called that. :)

Yes, contact GOG or idjewelry (idjewelryonline.com). Both carry G&Co and usually their prices are a % off the MSRP. Give them a call for best results - I like the one you chose. Just FYI on the wedding band, you couldn't put a band flush with it and hopefully she's ok with it (you couldn't put it flush with any of these styles). Either vendor can find you a fantastic diamond in your budget, too!
 
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