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advice on proposing to my boyfriend

cookieb2013

Rough_Rock
Joined
May 13, 2012
Messages
1
so i told his bestfriend i wanted to propose to him and she told him , which made me upset but , he didnt believe her , so one day while we were laying down i hinted about it , and automatically jumped up on me had the biggest smile on his face and asked if we were gettin engaged so its no doubt that he doesnt mind me proposing to him its just how ima do it nd when , also he;s asked which one of us is going to propose first nd i never gave the answer

* i could wait until he proposes then later on in life propose back ?
* i could propose with or without the ring ?
* i could propose with one ring or two rings and just have matching bands ?
* or just wait until he proposes ?

so many options .. please help !!!
 

tammy77

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 23, 2011
Messages
1,442
Personally, I'd wait for him to propose to you unless you think he is very non traditional regarding engagement. I think it'd be good for you to let him know that you'd like to be engaged, but are waiting for him though so he can have that honor. :wink2: Good luck!
 

naikii

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
20
To me, as a guy, I think that one of the most important things of our whole life is proposing to the right woman and doing it right.

I would be slightly offended if my girlfriend proposed to me, despite the fact that I want to marry her, because it takes away from me all the planning that is involved, the purchase of the perfect ring and the opportunity to do something absolutely magical for my girl.

Of course not all guys will share my opinion, and many may love the idea of being proposed to, I would drop hints something like ‘wow my friend at work just proposed to her boyfriend and everybody is so shocked’ or something, and then gauge his opinions by his responses. If he says ‘I think its sweet’ go for it, if he says ‘yea that is a bit strange’ don’t go for it!

I think in regards to the ring, if you are going to propose you should buy him a ring, but I am not sure if you should buy a ring for yourself before proposing. I think perhaps the safest thing to do would be to totally reverse the roles, buy his engagement ring, but not yourself. Afterwards you can tell him you want to buy one for yourself but shop for it together perhaps, and in all likelihood he will offer to pay.
 

kefira

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Nov 20, 2011
Messages
197
I think there is nothing wrong with proposing to your boyfriend. And, I think you know your relationship the best. When my husband was still my bf, we had discussed marriage several times, and I knew it was something he wanted with me. I resisted for a long time because I wasn't very comfortable with marriage as a concept. Over time, I came to like the idea as well, and so one day I basically just asked him, "Hey, do you want to go to Vegas on X weekend? I'd like to get married now." But I'm really casual that way and I wanted no part in a wedding ceremony. But I am the one who "proposed" and he didn't feel slighted or like I'd taken anything from him. If your bf is like that, then go for it! I still got a proposal from my husband when we bought my ering (after a year+ of marriage!). :D

If you do propose, I'd say the simple matching bands idea is a nice gesture. Good luck, whatever you decide to do!
 

madelise

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 23, 2011
Messages
5,362
I think this topic is one of those that, since not a lot of people went through, you won't be able to get too much solid advice. Only you know what you're okay with. Do you want a proposal? Do you want him to propose? Do you want to be surprised? Do you want an engagement ring? You need to answer those questions, and you'll have your answer.

I love that you want to surprise him. If you do end up choosing to wait for him to propose, you can always reciprocate the gesture by later surprising him with an "engagement ring", or gift. You can always get him a simple band for him to wear as his own "e-ring", and then get him a 2nd band, maybe more ornate, as his WB. Or you can buy him a watch? Or some other gift?

You sound super sweet. I hope you make the best decision for you!
 
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