Stress

[Tigarlily1]

I''ve noticed lately that the stresses in my life are having a huge impact on my mood. I have been feeling overwhelmed fixing up and cleaning my new house, taking care of my puppy, going to school, going to work, waiting for a proposal and just balancing everything in my life between family, friends and my SO. When I get really stressed I am much more moody, easily aggitated, and just less fun-loving and carefree than the girl I really think I am. I feel really bad when I get into these funks because it''s really not my SO''s fault and I feel bad that he has to be around me when I''m grumpy. Also, who would want to propose to someone that is in a bad mood?

So I wanted to ask you guys what do you do to keep your stress levels down. Everyone these days has such busy lives and we all know that stress is bad for your health and bad for your mental attitude, so what do you do to relieve it? Do you meditate, practice deep breathing, get out into nature, have a special hobby, or something totally different? I would love to hear your ideas about this and hopefully I can figure out a way to make this summer more relaxed and happy for my SO and myself.

 

[Loveitroundbrilliant]

I know it is silly but whenever i start getting frustrated i put the headphones on and go for a LONG run/walk. It really helps! Hope things get less stressful!

 

[RaiKai]

Activity wise - I take time for me. I am proactive in reducing stress before it really happens. I run six miles every morning before my day even really starts and most people are out of bed. I do yoga and hot yoga at least a couple times a week. I sit down and read a book rather than watch television (I find television can stress me out!). I take time to talk and spend time with DH - camping, walking, a bike ride, going for dinner or something (we both tend to have the effect on each other of reducing stress just by hanging out and talking!). I watch something I find hilarious like Family Guy!). I go for a hike or a walk outdoors. Sometimes I go for a massage, or DH will rub my feet for me. And I make sure I get to bed early and get some sleep or take a nap!

And, in general, I just keep a pretty relaxed attitude to life and go easy on myself. I don't try to do it all (I used to!). I am pretty in tune and aware as to when I am getting a bit stressed and just take the time to breathe, and remind myself tomorrow is another day. Even though I have a pretty busy life and a lot of potential stresses, the honest truth is that it is pretty rare that it all needs to be taken care of now, or that it can't be figured out even while slowing down.

And honestly, if I ever am feeling THAT overwhelmed, I realize I can make some adjustments where I can to be *less busy*. You do have control over the choices you make in your life, and in particular over how you choose to react to things. I won't get into the details of how busy or stressful my life can be or has been at times, but let me just say that I manage(d) to be pretty unstressed, where others around me were pulling their hair out, as so much of it is about mental attitude. While I could not control all the stresses, I could manage how I reacted to them, and I certainly could make changes where I was feeling overwhelmed and choose to be *less busy*. And even where I chose to remain busy....knowing it was fully my choice to do so eased the stress of it all.

In my opinion, life is too short to live it under stress.

 

[Erin]

Running.
I agree with running in the morning. Before I started doing that my mind would race all morning long while I was getting ready for working stressing about what I needed to do first thing, I owe that guy an email response, is that marketing meeting Thursday or Friday, oh and the dogs need this or that, and tomorrows garbage day, still have laundry in the dryer, I need to call my friend Kari about this Friday, should have mailed that RSVP already...

Now I spend the first 30 minutes of my day blocking it all out in a calm state and I''ve become a better list maker in my personal life.

 

[Indylady]

Is there any underlying source of stress you might not have thought about? Sometimes, I''ll chat with my friends when I''m feeling stressed, and they''ll help me get to the root of my problem.

I was feeling similarly at the end of last semester. I didn''t know where I was going for graduate school, was waitilisted at a few really good schools, was waiting on the Fulbright, considered taking a year off, and had no idea what to expect financially or in terms of moving for something that I was about to start in just a few months. My close friends had pretty much figured out what they were doing, and were doing amazing things like going to Columbia for film school or backpacking through Europe. I really got into funk, and it was awful. I knew what was bugging me, but it didn''t keep me from getting frustrated by a lot of little things along the way.

To keep my stress away:
-I try to stay organized, and neat.
-I keep a giant calender on the wall so I can write down what I''ve got to do, and see it easily. It keeps my to-do list from racing through my mind.
-Only make a few sets of plans for the day. I used to pack my schedule full so I barely had time to run from one thing to the next, and now I take things much slower.
-Try to figure out what exactly is bothering me.

When I''m already stressed:
-I like to go running, or take a bodytone class at the gym.
-I make sure that I''m eating well. When I get really busy, I begin to eat more take-out, and drink more coffee and soda, and a lot of that does have a physical impact.
-Figure out what''s getting to me, and whether there''s anything I can do about it.
-I watch Stardust.
-Go out for dinner with my SO, or make a nicer-than-usual dinner at home. Basically, we''ll recreate a date night at home if we don''t go out.
-Talk to my parents. They''re really wonderful at reminding me that I have a lot to be thankful for, and that there''s no sense in stressing over minor details in life.

 

[HopeDream]

Tigerlilly1 I hope you feel beter soon!

Whenever I notice I''m grumpy I tell my BF and tell him why too (so he knows I''m not mad at him) then he''s more patient and extra kind with me. Sometimes we will go for a long walk and I will tell him all my worries - this helps.
I''ll also do a brainstom and write down everything that''s stressing me out on a peice of paper, and then order the list from most stressful at the top, to least stressful at the bottom - this helps too.

 

[Tigarlily1]

Thank you everyone for your awesome suggestions! I definately agree that exercising and getting back to eating more healthily would be great things for me to do. I totally let those things slip when I started to get super busy and I really feel like it has made it even harder. Yet its hard to get started when you feel like its another thing on your plate. I just gotta do it! Attitude I also agree is an important part. School is finally over for the summer so hopefully things will be lightening up soon. I appreciate my SO so much for sticking by me when I am a big old grump. Somedays I don''t even wanna be around myself. I wanna turn this stress issue around both for myself so I feel better and for him. I want to get back to the fun we had last summer!

Is there any underlying source of stress you might not have thought about?
I think my stress is mostly because of chaos. In the past couple months I moved out of my apartment, into my SO''s parents house, and then into our new house. Buying a house was one of the most stressful things I''ve EVER done but I thought once we moved in it would be easier. But really we have continued to be super busy and it seems there is no time for R&R because even when you take the time the place is a disaster and that makes it so I can''t really relax. Right now we are in the process of remodeling our bathroom and everything is ripped out of there and strewn about in the dining room and office. My kitchen is a mess, my bedroom a disaster zone. I really like the idea of the big calendar. I''m a big list person. So I think I''ll make a list and start checking things off. The only way I''m really going to get rid of this stress is to get my house straightened around.

I know there is another thread on here about someone who enjoys cooking and cleaning. Man, I wish that was me! I feel so much pressure (from myself/society) to be like that and I just am not! LOL