What made it real?

[mjso]

Sooo, I just sent out the first half of our Save the Dates. (We still need to label the second half, I''m okay with them being sent in two batches). I finally feel like it is real. We''ve been engaged for 8 months now, but this has sealed the deal. There''s no going back now (haha, I sound like I should be the groom).

What moment made it "real" to you? Buying the dress? Booking the Venue? Your first gift?

 

[Izzy03]

While I have felt little bits of "omg, I''m getting married", it hasn''t smacked me yet. I think trying on wedding gowns will be the moment for me. I am going to try on dresses this weekend, so we''ll see!

 

[zoebartlett]

Hmmm, I''m not sure what the first thing was that made it REAL for me. It could have been finding my dress or booking our venue. If I had to choose between those two, I might pick finding my dress. I never thought I''d wear a wedding gown and I even went shopping with a friend one day for a dress (to look for anything but a wedding dress). It just so happened that on my way home from shopping, I went into a bridal shop, just to see what they had. Well, whaddya know? I ended up finding my dress and I went back shortly thereafter with my mom to buy it. I think it was probably at that point that I got a concrete vision of what our wedding would potentially look like.

 

[Sabine]

This might sound weird, but for me it wasn''t overwhelmingly real until I paid the remainder of our balance for the reception. I think because it was so much money, it was the only thing that really registered as undoable, untakebackable, but in a good way.

 

[musey]

Signing our venue contract definitely made it feel more "real" for me, for a time. Then that faded.

Dropping the save-the-dates in the mail brought another wave of "ooh, this is really real!" That waned after a few weeks.

Then getting my wedding dress in and having the first fitting brought a few days of "Oh my gosh, I can't believe it's really happening! I'm a bride!" Until I got used to seeing it hanging in our hallway (about a week).

Dropping our invitations in the mail had the longest lasting effect, because every time we got an RSVP it reminded me that we were actually getting married. The first wave has died down now, though, and it again feels more "surreal" than "real."


Unless I'm weird, it comes in waves... you'll get little reminders throughout each 'step' of the planning process. I don't think it'll feel permanently "real" until we've been back from the honeymoon a few weeks, and I start introducing myself as Musey Marriedlastname

 

[fieryred33143]

I''ve been considering starting a thread like this too. Nothing has felt real yet. My guess is that once I book the venue, it''ll feel more real.

 

[PearlDahhhling]

I''ve only been engaged for 2 1/2 weeks but we''re beginning to think about venues and things and this morning I got a call from this once place we''ve been interested in looking at since I had sent them an e-mail over the weekend and we have an appointment to see the place on Thursday. When I hung up I thought "Wow! This is really happening?!?" Also every time I look down at my engagement ring it gives me a little burst of "OMG I''M GETTING MARRIED!!!!" So it''s exciting. Haha. But I think when I go try on dresses it will REALLY hit me!

 

[buttercup80]

Definitely sending out the invitations. . . also, once we started receiving gifts - we''re getting married!

 

[jcrow]

behind the closed doors in the vestibule of the cathedral. trumpet sounding the music i so carefully selected. each bridesmaid one by one leaving me all alone in there with my grandfather.

THAT''S when it felt real.

and i started sobbing.

 

[LaraOnline]

The whole thing was like a dream for me, from beginning to end.

 

[mjso]

Date: 8/25/2008 8:52:26 PM
Author: musey
Signing our venue contract definitely made it feel more 'real' for me, for a time. Then that faded.

Dropping the save-the-dates in the mail brought another wave of 'ooh, this is really real!' That waned after a few weeks.

Then getting my wedding dress in and having the first fitting brought a few days of 'Oh my gosh, I can't believe it's really happening! I'm a bride!' Until I got used to seeing it hanging in our hallway (about a week).

Dropping our invitations in the mail had the longest lasting effect, because every time we got an RSVP it reminded me that we were actually getting married. The first wave has died down now, though, and it again feels more 'surreal' than 'real.'


Unless I'm weird, it comes in waves... you'll get little reminders throughout each 'step' of the planning process. I don't think it'll feel permanently 'real' until we've been back from the honeymoon a few weeks, and I start introducing myself as Musey Marriedlastname

Wow! These are all good replies.

Musey, I totally get what you are saying. When I went with my mom to book the venue, it felt kind of real. But then, they said if "something happens" we would get pretty much all of our money back as long as they could rebook the date for at least as much $ as we were contracted for. For some reason, the sending out the Save the Dates makes it more "we can't take it back" without a lot of explanation. Not like I want to take it back or anything, just to think "this is really happening"! It's pretty exciting.

In some ways I think it won't be really real until I'm waiting at the end of the aisle, just like jcrow said.

I think throughout the process there will be other "it's REALLY real" moments.

Anyone else have others to share?

ETA: I seriously CANNOT believe I have been engaged for 8 months!!! It has flown by. At first I felt like I had so much time and now I think its almost halfway over. I am convinced the older you get, the faster time goes...

 

[Gypsy]

A lot of things have made it more and more real. It''s been a progression... but today we got our wedding bands and tried them on... and looking down at our hands, both wearing the bands really hit home for me. And for John. Neither of us wanted to take them off.

I''m off to post the bands (my gift from PS) in SMTR.

 

[swimmer]

I still sometimes look at this wonderful and strange fellow I live with and think, "we are married?"

Exactly, it comes in waves of realization, like putting him down as my emergency contact, and getting a drivers license yesterday with his name now mine! Picking up his drycleaning for some reason always felt so married while we were engaged.

 

[kellybelly]

it''s amazing how its different for everyone. we''ve been engaged for 8 months and our wedding is in february, and nothing feels real yet. booked a place, bought a dress, ordered save the dates..... heck, we just bought a house and that doesn''t feel real either. i''m the kind of person that take a while to adjust to new things. maybe in 2 years when i have a kid and we''re looking at the wedding album, THEN it will all feel real.

 

[labbielove]

Many little things along the way, but the big WOW was when people started arriving from out of town in the couple of days before the wedding. It was like- Hey! They are here for US!!! This IS huge and it''s REALLY happening!

 

[Italiahaircolor]

When the doors opened for the ceremony...that was my "it''s real" moment

 

[Cleopatra]

Date: 8/26/2008 2:20:33 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
When the doors opened for the ceremony...that was my ''it''s real'' moment

I completely agree! It felt like a long dream until my dad took my arm, looked at me, and said "Let''s do this" - the doors opened, saw my DH at the altar, and a big wave of emotion came over me as I realized I was about to marry him

 

[kittybean]

Well, I''ve booked the venue, booked the church, almost booked the photographer, been dress shopping a few days, been cake tasting, looked at invitations . . . and it all still feels like a dream. Even though FI and I moved in together earlier this month, I feel like nothing has really changed. All the wedding stuff just seems surreal . . .

 

[Rhea]

My first wedding anniversary.

 

[julesbeth]

When I sent out my invites, I got that holy s*it moment for sure. It was great, but also like, ''ok, were def. doing this!''

Also, I had my first shower that same week. It was a double whammy of ''real-ness''