Maybe soon???

[DMBsGirl]

Well I have an inkling that my boyfriend might propose soon, as in this month soon. My reasons for thinking this are......
1) our 9 yr anniversary (not a typo) is on Sept 24.
2) He recently asked me when my next long weekend was (I work in a school). So I told him that for Rosh Hashanah I have the 13th and 14th of Sept off. He then went online and told me that we should go somewhere. We looked at a couple of places but never finalized anything. When I ask him if we are going anywhere, he gives me a goofy smile and changes the subject.
3) A slew of friends have gotten engaged recently and he knows that with every engagement I get more and more impatient and upset because I feel like it should be MY TURN. My best friend''s boyfriend told me 6 months ago that he was proposing to her on her birthday (October 3rd.) My boyfriend knows this as well. I dont think he would allow ANOTHER engagement to come before mine in fear of how crazy i might get, lol.

But....something tells me that my boyfriend, who is big on surprises, would not make it obvious. His goofy smile when I ask about the weekend screams "I''m planning something." Maybe he just wants to throw me off... oh, and our anniversary?? Isn''t that predictable as well? That makes me feel that he might not pick that date either.
AHHHHH!!! I''m officially driving myself nuts thinking about WHEN. I hope I''m not getting my hopes up for nothing. Please send some engagement fairy dust my way ladies!

 

[mimzy]

eeeee!!

i bet that goofy smile is all he can do to not break out in giggles because it has to be coming soon! hopefully his understanding of you being more upset by each passing engagement is enough to trump his desire to make it completely unexpected. i hope i hope i hope it is this month for you!

 

[Sassee]

I am about to arrange for a truck load of fairy dust to be delivered to you!!

Geez girl - 9 years!!! I don''t blame you for starting to get a little impatient. I thought 5 years was long enough to wait!!

Good luck - I am sending all of my positive energy your way! Lets hope he comes through with the goods this month!!

 

[Sassee]

Ps: your bunny is adorable.

I had a beautiful caramel coloured rabbit when I was growing up. Her name was Caramel Fudge (not very original but we were kids) and she was such a gorgeous creature. I still miss her

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/5/2007 8:28:03 PM
Author: Sassee
I am about to arrange for a truck load of fairy dust to be delivered to you!!

Geez girl - 9 years!!! I don''t blame you for starting to get a little impatient. I thought 5 years was long enough to wait!!

Good luck - I am sending all of my positive energy your way! Lets hope he comes through with the goods this month!!

haha, yes, nine years is long! but in all honesty i havent WANTED to get engaged until about a year ago. We started dating when I was 18 and I was in grad school until 25. I didn''t feel READY for engagement/marriage during my early 20s.

p.s. I am anxiously awaiting that truckload of dust!

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/5/2007 8:20:07 PM
Author: mimzy
eeeee!!

i bet that goofy smile is all he can do to not break out in giggles because it has to be coming soon! hopefully his understanding of you being more upset by each passing engagement is enough to trump his desire to make it completely unexpected. i hope i hope i hope it is this month for you!

Thanks! I hope so too. I was nervous to post cause I thought if i said it out loud (well wrote it, lol) I might jjinx it, haha.

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/5/2007 8:31:13 PM
Author: Sassee
Ps: your bunny is adorable.

I had a beautiful caramel coloured rabbit when I was growing up. Her name was Caramel Fudge (not very original but we were kids) and she was such a gorgeous creature. I still miss her

aww thanks, I love bunnies! I have another bunny too,that lives with my parents. She is a white and caramel lop. here is her baby pic (she''s about 7 pounds now).

 

[Sassee]

Date: 9/5/2007 8:32:00 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

Date: 9/5/2007 8:28:03 PM
Author: Sassee
I am about to arrange for a truck load of fairy dust to be delivered to you!!

Geez girl - 9 years!!! I don''t blame you for starting to get a little impatient. I thought 5 years was long enough to wait!!

Good luck - I am sending all of my positive energy your way! Lets hope he comes through with the goods this month!!

haha, yes, nine years is long! but in all honesty i havent WANTED to get engaged until about a year ago. We started dating when I was 18 and I was in grad school until 25. I didn''t feel READY for engagement/marriage during my early 20s.

p.s. I am anxiously awaiting that truckload of dust!

Well that is a relief to hear... I was about to nominate you for honorary sainthood for being a patient LIW for 9 years, but if you''ve been happy humming along (until recently) then that is totally cool...

Yep, just arranging for delivery now

 

[Sassee]

Date: 9/5/2007 8:35:45 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

Date: 9/5/2007 8:31:13 PM
Author: Sassee
Ps: your bunny is adorable.

I had a beautiful caramel coloured rabbit when I was growing up. Her name was Caramel Fudge (not very original but we were kids) and she was such a gorgeous creature. I still miss her

aww thanks, I love bunnies! I have another bunny too,that lives with my parents. She is a white and caramel lop. here is her baby pic (she''s about 7 pounds now).

Speechless.. she is just SO precious!!

 

[ringplease]

DMBsGirl,
I have a feeling something exciting is coming soon for you! I can also relate. My BF and I celebrated our 9 year anniversary on August 31st and I too am READY to be engaged. However, we met when I was 15 and he was 18 and we took some time apart in the middle but still! I do know how you feel when you tell people how long you have been together and they are in shock.
So, hopefully the goofy smile and the 4 day vacation will bring good things your way!

 

[musey]

Date: 9/5/2007 7:46:52 PM
Author:DMBsGirl
Well I have an inkling that my boyfriend might propose soon, as in this month soon. My reasons for thinking this are......

1) our 9 yr anniversary (not a typo) is on Sept 24.

LOL, DMBsGirl. I love that you have such a sense of humor about it

I SO hope it's coming this weekend!! You've been LIW-ing for almost a year now, correct? It's YOUR turn!

 

[FarFarAway]

*dusts you with good luck dust*

 

[TravelingGal]

I''m always happy to see long time LIWs get engaged. I really hope this is it for you...you''ve been more than patient!

 

[bee*]

That''s so exciting!! I hope that it happens for you soon and that he''s booked a nice trip away! I''ve been the exact same as you in that Ive been with D for so long(8 years) but haven''t felt ready to get engaged till about a year ago also. It''s funny seeing peoples faces when you tell them how long you''ve been together-they automatically look at my ring finger! Well lots of fairy dust being sent your way.

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/5/2007 10:17:30 PM
Author: musey

Date: 9/5/2007 7:46:52 PM
Author:DMBsGirl
Well I have an inkling that my boyfriend might propose soon, as in this month soon. My reasons for thinking this are......

1) our 9 yr anniversary (not a typo) is on Sept 24.

LOL, DMBsGirl. I love that you have such a sense of humor about it

I SO hope it's coming this weekend!! You've been LIW-ing for almost a year now, correct? It's YOUR turn!

Yes, Musey, it is almost my one year anniversary on the LIW list! I started in the 80s and am now 14 i believe!

ETA: I asked him AGAIN about the long weekend and he said "I don't know" with a smile. When I pressed him about it, saying I needed to know because I'd go visit my parents if we weren't doing anything he said "you can go visit your parents." What the poo! I complained and said that sucks cause we didnt go anywhere this summer. I hope he's kidding

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/6/2007 12:35:57 PM
Author: bee*
That''s so exciting!! I hope that it happens for you soon and that he''s booked a nice trip away! I''ve been the exact same as you in that Ive been with D for so long(8 years) but haven''t felt ready to get engaged till about a year ago also. It''s funny seeing peoples faces when you tell them how long you''ve been together-they automatically look at my ring finger! Well lots of fairy dust being sent your way.

Yeah I hate people''s reactions. Usually, I also get a "what is he waiting for?" and then a questioning look as if to say "maybe he''s not that into you." lol, people like that suck! I guess its hard for people to understand that although we''ve been together for a long time, we were SO young, and wanted to be settled in our careers and financially ready for marriage. Had we gotten engaged at 23 I''m sure these same people would have said "what''s the rush!"

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

style="WIDTH: 96.32%; HEIGHT: 134px">Date: 9/6/2007 1:38:36 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

ETA: I asked him AGAIN about the long weekend and he said ''I don''t know'' with a smile. When I pressed him about it, saying I needed to know because I''d go visit my parents if we weren''t doing anything he said ''you can go visit your parents.'' What the poo! I complained and said that sucks cause we didnt go anywhere this summer. I hope he''s kidding

This struck such a chord with me...I got to thinking that SO was going to do it this past weekend so to test him, I wiggled out of the plans. When he let me out of them, I knew he wasn''t planning anything.

However, your situation is drastically different. Besides, you never know if your parents are in on the plans...so maybe if you called to plan to visit they would know well enough to say they had plans of their own....justa thought...

 

[bee*]

Date: 9/6/2007 1:44:32 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

Date: 9/6/2007 12:35:57 PM

Author: bee*

That''s so exciting!! I hope that it happens for you soon and that he''s booked a nice trip away! I''ve been the exact same as you in that Ive been with D for so long(8 years) but haven''t felt ready to get engaged till about a year ago also. It''s funny seeing peoples faces when you tell them how long you''ve been together-they automatically look at my ring finger! Well lots of fairy dust being sent your way.

Yeah I hate people''s reactions. Usually, I also get a ''what is he waiting for?'' and then a questioning look as if to say ''maybe he''s not that into you.'' lol, people like that suck! I guess its hard for people to understand that although we''ve been together for a long time, we were SO young, and wanted to be settled in our careers and financially ready for marriage. Had we gotten engaged at 23 I''m sure these same people would have said ''what''s the rush!''

Oh yeah, I definitely know that "he''s not that into you" look! Drives me mad. I get that a lot from two friends of ours who got married earlier in the year. As soon as they got engaged, they have not stopped asking D and I why we haven''t. So frustrating

 

[ringplease]

Date: 9/6/2007 5:21:34 PM
Author: bee*

Date: 9/6/2007 1:44:32 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

Date: 9/6/2007 12:35:57 PM

Author: bee*

That''s so exciting!! I hope that it happens for you soon and that he''s booked a nice trip away! I''ve been the exact same as you in that Ive been with D for so long(8 years) but haven''t felt ready to get engaged till about a year ago also. It''s funny seeing peoples faces when you tell them how long you''ve been together-they automatically look at my ring finger! Well lots of fairy dust being sent your way.

Yeah I hate people''s reactions. Usually, I also get a ''what is he waiting for?'' and then a questioning look as if to say ''maybe he''s not that into you.'' lol, people like that suck! I guess its hard for people to understand that although we''ve been together for a long time, we were SO young, and wanted to be settled in our careers and financially ready for marriage. Had we gotten engaged at 23 I''m sure these same people would have said ''what''s the rush!''

Oh yeah, I definitely know that ''he''s not that into you'' look! Drives me mad. I get that a lot from two friends of ours who got married earlier in the year. As soon as they got engaged, they have not stopped asking D and I why we haven''t. So frustrating

I agree... that look is the worst. However, what is funny and ironic to me is that FF and I have been dating longer than most of our married friends have been together all combined! I do look forward to the day of our wedding when I can say "I have been waiting for this for over 10 years!!!"

 

[DMBsGirl]

*UPDATE*
well, the 13th and 14th came and no proposal.
Yesterday was our 9 year anniversary, no proposal.
he was very sweet though, drove out earlier in the day and bought my favorite meal from my favorite restaurant, which is 40 mins away, and got me an admission ticket for the san diego zoo and a jetblue gift certificate. so we''re going to san diego, (we''re from NY and have never been to California.) I LOVE animals and zoos so the san diego zoo ticket was a perfect gift for me. we haven''t decided when we will go to san diego yet.
his gift was very sweet and thoughtful but i was disappointed/devastated when the proposal didn''t happen. I had gotten my hopes up sooooo high and felt crushed. I tried to hide the disappointment and although i felt near tears, I didn''t cry until i got into bed. (i go to sleep much earlier than he does so didn''t expect him to catch me) BUT he walked in and saw me crying. he made me tell him what was wrong and when i told him i had gotten my hopes up and was sad that i didnt get a proposal he said "sorry i didn''t come through" and left the room. so that made me feel even WORSE, cause now he was angry at me, although he said he wasn''t.
i have no idea what he is planning but i wish he understood that at this point all that matters to me is that it happen. i have been waiting so long and its just too much to deal with emotionally at this point. everytime i come home i wonder if today will be "the day." He did promise it would happen this year, but I had totally expected to be engaged by now. My best friend will be proposed to next week (her bf told me) and while I love her and will be thrilled for her, it will be extra hard to see yet another person in my life reach that point before me.

 

[bee*]

awww...hugs

I''m so disappointed for you. I was so hoping that it would happen for your anniversary. I know that it probably seems like decades for you but there are only three months left to this year so if what he said is true, it will be in the next three months. It will fly by. I don''t want to upset you but with his comment "sorry I didn''t come through for you" that would worry me a tiny bit. Does that mean that he just didn''t get his things organised in time or is he not ready? I know and understand how hard it is going out with someone for so many years and everyone else is settling down and it is so frustrating. But just remember what a great relationship you already have and why you''ve been together so long, the engagement will just be the icing on the cake

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/25/2007 2:16:23 PM
Author: bee*
awww...hugs

I''m so disappointed for you. I was so hoping that it would happen for your anniversary. I know that it probably seems like decades for you but there are only three months left to this year so if what he said is true, it will be in the next three months. It will fly by. I don''t want to upset you but with his comment ''sorry I didn''t come through for you'' that would worry me a tiny bit. Does that mean that he just didn''t get his things organised in time or is he not ready? I know and understand how hard it is going out with someone for so many years and everyone else is settling down and it is so frustrating. But just remember what a great relationship you already have and why you''ve been together so long, the engagement will just be the icing on the cake

I dont think the comment has to do with not being ready. he has his heart set on the proposal being a surprise and something really good. I think at some point, when i was much younger (prob 20) I mentioned how i wanted some out of this world proposal, but i''ve since grown up and realize it isn''t about that! I think he still remembers those words and thinks it has to be outlandish. plus a friend recently got engaged with a serenade at central park so i think he feels that he needs to give me a good "story." now, if i tell him this, he will think i am just saying that so that it will happen SOONER. blah, i give up!

 

[bee*]

Date: 9/25/2007 2:25:28 PM
Author: DMBsGirl

Date: 9/25/2007 2:16:23 PM

Author: bee*

awww...hugs

I''m so disappointed for you. I was so hoping that it would happen for your anniversary. I know that it probably seems like decades for you but there are only three months left to this year so if what he said is true, it will be in the next three months. It will fly by. I don''t want to upset you but with his comment ''sorry I didn''t come through for you'' that would worry me a tiny bit. Does that mean that he just didn''t get his things organised in time or is he not ready? I know and understand how hard it is going out with someone for so many years and everyone else is settling down and it is so frustrating. But just remember what a great relationship you already have and why you''ve been together so long, the engagement will just be the icing on the cake

I dont think the comment has to do with not being ready. he has his heart set on the proposal being a surprise and something really good. I think at some point, when i was much younger (prob 20) I mentioned how i wanted some out of this world proposal, but i''ve since grown up and realize it isn''t about that! I think he still remembers those words and thinks it has to be outlandish. plus a friend recently got engaged with a serenade at central park so i think he feels that he needs to give me a good ''story.'' now, if i tell him this, he will think i am just saying that so that it will happen SOONER. blah, i give up!

That''s good that it''s the surprise proposal that''s keeping him! I really really hope that he does it soon for you! Hopefully we''ll both be off the LIW list soon

 

[dps777]

As someone who is anxiously awaiting a proposal, I can certainly appreciate your disappointment, but on the other hand, it''s almost October so I am sure it''s not too far away. And most importantly, sounds like he''s extremely thoughtful given the anniversary example you highlighted. Your friend''s upcoming engagement can serve as a reminder that yours is merely around the corner!! When I start to get over-anxious, I simply think about some of my friends who are struggling to find a guy to go out with on a second date!! Doesn''t always help, but some good perspective IMHO.

 

[dps777]

One additional after-thought...something I am challenging myself with these days is enjoying this pre-engagement time since once we are engaged, we will be caught up with planning and lots of logistics. I want to take this time as an opportunity to truly appreciate what we have so once we do become engaged, I don''t lose perspective on what''s important (which I presume can sometimes happen).

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

Disappointment is by far the most difficult aspect of being an LIW IMHO. It’s very hard not to get your hopes up when special occasions roll around.

I shouldn''t even go here, but I''m going to anyway....your SO just arranged for you two to go to San Diego and hit up the zoo which is perfect for you since you love animals…have you wondered at all if maybe this plays into his plans in any way?

I know how hard it is to get over the disappointment factor. When my birthday rolled around in May and my SO told me when I opened my present I would “probably sh*t” myself I had to work really hard at not getting my hopes up. Thank goodness I kept myself in check because I got a Wii and a Burberry purse…both nice gifts but so not a ring!

At the end of the day though, what you have is a man who is willing to drive 40 miles to get you food and a man who is planning a trip for the two of you to experience some place amazing (I’m an East Coast girl who’s desperately in love with the West Coast). As for his comment, it’s hard because as much as I want to be mad at him for getting upset, I can’t do it. He was probably crushed that your day was disappointing because you didn’t get your ring after he put a lot of hard work and thought into planning for you.

Just do your best to relax and know that your time will come and from the sounds of it, your man is going to have something amazing planned for you and I bet you will be on here saying, "it was totally worth the wait!".

 

[janinegirly]

ugh, disappointment is the worst! i''ve been there and can relate. birthdays passed me buy without propsals (all the while I was picturing myself goign to work with my ring), then anniversaries where i was the one to book the dinners, then holidays...nothing. then there were the times he''d says something mysterious like "i made a reservation at a great restaurant" but then it turned out to be nothing than...a reservation at a great restaurant.

by the time the proposal did come, i''d convinced myself none of the clues were real! looking back (and talking to FI), it turns out he was TOTALLY clueless during all those occassions when I thought/hoped it was about to happen. he just thought i was moody..b/c i was getting older, or it was another occassion where he didn''t get the right gift,etc. sometimes., guys are so clueless!!!!

anyway, all i can say, is that for me..right when i started suspecting and hoping (and yes, then disappointed) was right around the time the actual proposal was infact around the corner (although at the time, it was just a brutal LIW phase!). So...basically, it''s close!! and the reason why it''s so hard right now, is BECAUSE it''s so close. hang in there, it''lll happen soon!

 

[ladypirate]

*Hugs* I''m so sorry--I hate when you''re really excited about something and then it doesn''t happen. It makes everything else seem kind of lackluster, even if it''s awesome.

 

[jennypoo]

DMBsGirl, I *SO* feel your pain. I was so anxious for our 8 year anniversary (August 24) because I thought FOR SURE that would be THE night. Well, obviously it came and went uneventfully. Mind you it was nice. He bought me a bouquet of roses and made reservations at a nice restaurant. I tried SO hard to choke back the tears when the night was nearing its end and I came to the grim realization that no, it wasn't THE night.

Every day I come home from work thinking, "Maybe TONIGHT is THE night!" When it never is. Birthdays and holidays come and go. Last year around November - December he told my brother he was starting to look at rings. Well, my brother being the big mouth he is told my mom, and my mom being an even BIGGER gossip than my brother leaked the news to me. I, of course, was ECSTATIC thinking it would be a Christmas proposal. Well, obviously that didn't happen. In fact it's almost been a YEAR since he told my brother he was going to start ring shopping!

I know I will not be involved in picking out the ring, which is fine, because I'm all for a surprise proposal, and he said it's something he's dreamed of for years. But for the love of God - I don't get why he just won't do it already! Brief recap for those who may not know - we've been dating for 8 years and own a house together, which we bought two years ago. We own the house jointly, even though he put WAY more cash down than I did, because we went into this with the eventuality of a marriage. It'll be two years this January! I used to get really sad and depressed thinking about it, but now, I honestly don't care. I'm passed the point of it being the most wonderful experience of my life to "Thank God it FINALLY happened." But that's after years and years of waiting and wondering, only to have my hopes dashed.

And I know what my options are. I'm so tired of outsiders being SO quick to judge the situation. Some people are sympathetic, while others take the attitude "Well, I wouldn't put up with that. I'd leave him and get on with my life. He's had more than enough time!" Well, EASIER SAID THAN DONE! It's so easy to offer unsolicited advice and preach from your high horse. I'm not looking for advice anymore.

Anyway... I guess what I mean to convey from all of this is that I FEEL YOUR PAIN! It's just ridiculous how some men are so ignorant to the fact that this kind of stuff EATS away at us.

By the way, this is an odd question, but what is his Zodiac sign? My boyfriend is a Sagittarius and exhibits 90% of the Saggittarian traits. (I'm a Taurus, on the other hand - according to the Zodiac our signs are not at all compatible! LOL!) Sag = free spirit hard to tie down. Taurus = grounded and loyal. (Obviously the Zodiac isn't everything, but it's interesting!)

 

[DMBsGirl]

Date: 9/25/2007 8:09:35 PM
Author: jennypoo
DMBsGirl, I *SO* feel your pain. I was so anxious for our 8 year anniversary (August 24) because I thought FOR SURE that would be THE night. Well, obviously it came and went uneventfully. Mind you it was nice. He bought me a bouquet of roses and made reservations at a nice restaurant. I tried SO hard to choke back the tears when the night was nearing its end and I came to the grim realization that no, it wasn''t THE night.

Every day I come home from work thinking, ''Maybe TONIGHT is THE night!'' When it never is. Birthdays and holidays come and go. Last year around November - December he told my brother he was starting to look at rings. Well, my brother being the big mouth he is told my mom, and my mom being an even BIGGER gossip than my brother leaked the news to me. I, of course, was ECSTATIC thinking it would be a Christmas proposal. Well, obviously that didn''t happen. In fact it''s almost been a YEAR since he told my brother he was going to start ring shopping!

I know I will not be involved in picking out the ring, which is fine, because I''m all for a surprise proposal, and he said it''s something he''s dreamed of for years. But for the love of God - I don''t get why he just won''t do it already! Brief recap for those who may not know - we''ve been dating for 8 years and own a house together, which we bought two years ago. We own the house jointly, even though he put WAY more cash down than I did, because we went into this with the eventuality of a marriage. It''ll be two years this January! I used to get really sad and depressed thinking about it, but now, I honestly don''t care. I''m passed the point of it being the most wonderful experience of my life to ''Thank God it FINALLY happened.'' But that''s after years and years of waiting and wondering, only to have my hopes dashed.

And I know what my options are. I''m so tired of outsiders being SO quick to judge the situation. Some people are sympathetic, while others take the attitude ''Well, I wouldn''t put up with that. I''d leave him and get on with my life. He''s had more than enough time!'' Well, EASIER SAID THAN DONE! It''s so easy to offer unsolicited advice and preach from your high horse. I''m not looking for advice anymore.

Anyway... I guess what I mean to convey from all of this is that I FEEL YOUR PAIN! It''s just ridiculous how some men are so ignorant to the fact that this kind of stuff EATS away at us.

By the way, this is an odd question, but what is his Zodiac sign? My boyfriend is a Sagittarius and exhibits 90% of the Saggittarian traits. (I''m a Taurus, on the other hand - according to the Zodiac our signs are not at all compatible! LOL!) Sag = free spirit hard to tie down. Taurus = grounded and loyal. (Obviously the Zodiac isn''t everything, but it''s interesting!)

omg, he is ALSO a saggitarius! (dec 7) I''m a capricorn.
Well he admitted to me that he is hurt and felt that his gift was not good enough, despite me assuring him that the gift and all he did was amazing and very thoughtful. i tried very hard to convey my point but i don''t understand why it is so hard for boys to comprehend. He kept saying "you''re upset you didn''t get your ring." I continued to correct him and say "I was upset you didn''t propose and that we''re not ENGAGED." But I guess it''s easier to be upset if he thinks it''s just about a ring.