Post by btrflygrl23 » August 16th, 2009, 10:12 pm
I''m not sure who may remember my old post about whether FI and I should attend a high school classmate''s wedding due to the fact that a former girlfriend of mine was going to attend and we were no longer on speaking terms and had a really bad history and end to our friendship over the past year.

WELL...for anyone who does remember and would like to know how it went down...here goes...so based on the advice of my family and of course the advice I got from my PSers I went!

OK, so I should have known not to expect much but I figured she''s a grown up right??? We are in our late 20''s...she''s an attorney with a huge firm in my area BUT I was wrong!!!
This particular wedding took place over 2 days so the first day was the traditional Hindu ceremony followed by a vegetarian meal and that took place on Friday August 14th at 6:30 in the evening.
FI and I walk into the hall and head to our table she is already there (her DH was the best man). She is sitting at the table next to ours. She is sitting with her MIL, FIL, this girl we''ll call J (who FI and I both know, her DH is also a groomsman), and her other good friend S (I''m not sure if I told you guys this earlier but S is the one who told her when I was in her wedding party that she should expect ALL her maids to give her trouble closer to the day of the wedding as we would be getting jealous by then that it was not us getting married?? OK...), and S''s DH...

SO I hold my head high and clasp FI''s hand and we head to our table, we of course have to pause at her table to say hello to all the other people at her table that we do know and do speak to. They all don''t know what''s gone on. So we stop and start saying hello and she IMMEDIATELY very obviously and rudely gets up from the table with S and they walk off after they both give me a very dirty look...OK not obvious or awkward at ALL..

We take our seats...about 5 mins later she comes back with S and they are giggling and whispering to each other non stop and they walk behind my table and then stop to say hello to someone at the table behind us and linger and laugh and then go back to their table and start whispering some more and S then leans over and starts whispering to her DH who by the way attempted when we were at their table saying hello to introduce his wife (S) to my FI as he has not met her when she got up with miss thing and walked off HOW RUDE!Image

SO now we are all sitting but I am in her eyeline I guess and I say that b/c as soon as she sits down she MOVES her chair very obviously so that the centerpiece is in the way so she can''t see me and FI even noticed this.

Anyway, I think whatever I am going to be the bigger person but let me tell you I do now feel uncomfortable and kinda alone and I tell FI let''s not stay too long and he agrees and he tells me he is so sorry this is happening and that perhaps we should not have come well too late I guess...

All of a sudden the girl (J) that FI and both know who also knows HER comes over to my table and says let''s go to the washroom together...OK I don''t really have to go but fine I get up and go with her. By the way FI and I don''t know her very well we just know her.
So we get to the bathroom and she says what''s going on?? Super curious...and I say nothing why? She goes well when you guys came over to say hello I noticed that miss thing didn''t get up to say hello to you and I was wondering what is going on b/c you guys used to be so close and you were in her wedding blah, blah, blah...
I say well J you''ll have to ask miss thing, we have not spoken in ages, following her wedding she stopped speaking to me and I''m truly unclear as to why, I thought I fulfilled my duties as her maid and if I didn''t she did not discuss it with me. We just stopped speaking. I dropped the issue. I have so much going on in my life and there is so much serious stuff going on in the world that I try to expend my energy in a positive way and look to the future not the past and things I can''t fix.
Oh I''m so sorry she says this is terrible I hope you''re ok kisses me on the cheek! Eek we are not that close and it was weird and I was like this chick is after info and gossip to start crap and be all back and forth I''m not playing honey...
So I was totally right she practically RUNS back to the table and starts whispering with miss thing and I just know what I said is being repeated and then miss thing launches into what from my table looked like a hardcore verbal assault on apparently what I did to ruin her wedding and life b/c over the centerpiece I can see her horrible nasty facial expressions and terse hand gestures and they were at it for like 15 mins until the wedding started...


ceremony starts, ceremony ends, buffet starts at two opposite side of this huge room (600 guests)and she waits until I get up to go get my food and then grabs S''s hand and they venture to the other side of the room.
Her DH who is friends with FI walks by and FI say hey Scott and he snubs FI just looks past him and walks on so I guess she''s told him not to mingle with us...
FI was upset, I was uncomfortable and all the while remember this chick owes me money but I''m never going to see that I have made my peace with it...

Again J comes over oh how are you feeling?? you poor thing and I say J you really didn''t have to come over here to pity me b/c miss thing hates me I''m fine I''m a big girl and I can deal...obviously she wants to see my reaction to her poison and if I am upset I''m not going to give her the satisfaction...
We stay until dinner is done wish the groom and new bride and say we''ll see ya tmr and leave she is still there and I say to FI as we leave after tmr I NEVER want to see HER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He agrees.
I''m not going to lie to you guys even though I felt like I did the right thing and was the bigger person she did kinda make me feel alone and crappy and really like I was back in high school (I was bullied in high school so sometimes the old feelings of being with my back against a wall with people ganging up on me comes back)...
Thank you all so much for even reading this long tirade I love you guys all everyone and appreciate all you have done for me in terms of advice. I''m sorry for any spelling errors and tmr I will be back with part 2 the western reception on the next day Saturday August 15...

I''m glad it''s over and I''m trying to move on but this vent helps and I''m curious to see what you guys think....