This Girl Needs a COOKIE!

[momhappy]

^No, it's not personal. It's about judging people based on their appearances and apparently (according to this thread), it's okay to point fingers at someone who is thin and tell them to eat whatever food we can cram in their tiny bodies…. I understand her points (and agree with some of them). I also get that people have opinions/preferences and we like to voice them. However, there are ways to get your point across without being offensive rude and even the title of this thread is offensive/rude and should not be tolerated. Period.

 

[kenny]

Why isn't average exalted?

Though ironic, there's less money in that.

There's more money to be made by creating, reenforcing, and exploiting customer's fears and insecurities.
By brainwashing us that normal, natural and average is unacceptable the appearance industry snags MORE customers … afterall most people are average.

The irrational and subconscious message is, "Buy this and you'll look like this."

None of this is about what's nice, good, right or even reasonable.
It's about them maximizing profits.
It's a war.

Just don't play.
Spread the word.

 

[monarch64]

Why isn't average exalted?

Though ironic, there's less money in that.

There's more money to be made by creating, reenforcing, and exploiting customer's fears and insecurities.
The irrational and subconscious message is, "Buy this and you'll look like this."

None of this is about what's nice, good, or right.
It's about them maximizing profits.

Just don't play.
Spread the word.

Kenny's spot on. And average is not exalted because it's easily attainable and everyone already has it. We want what we can't have.

iLander, you opted to receive Urban Outfitter emails. The best way to show your disapproval is to unsubscribe and stop buying things from them, and their sister companies Anthropologie and Free People. Then, of course, you can contact their CEO's and express your dissatisfaction with the size of their models.

The use of shockingly thin models serves the purpose of catching the eyes of the target market (in UO's case, probably 12-24 year old women), as well as causing a stir outside the target market thereby generating even more publicity. Feeding into it just by talking about it in an "omg give that girl a cookie" way just adds to the effect, drives more traffic to their site, etc. It's what they want.

Discussing the images in a vague way without using the company's name is more effective. So is encouraging children to get outside and be physically active to keep their bodies and minds functioning properly. Participating in shock and awe commentary about women's bodies just perpetuates the cycle.

 

[alexah]

Reading through the comments reminded me of this story about a Yale girl from a month or two ago: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/frances-chan/yale-eating-disorders_b_4921382.html

 

[partgypsy]

If you compare the first pic with the other pics, basically the lighting has whited out parts of her arms so they look thinner than they actually are. Also the angle seems a little off (shooting above the head downwards) which also distorts the figure.
Not really a good or accurate pic. I wish these catalog people would trust that we would like accurate photos, and it is weird that they would purposely select a bad pic (overexposure, bad proportions) of a naturally thin person, just because it makes her look MORE thin.
I am a normal weight now, but growing up and especially hs and college was naturally thin and can't put weight on my arms and legs, Sorry, I have thin wrists. Not like I can selectively gain weight in my wrists or something! If I exercise very consistently I can bulk up a little in my arms and legs, but as soon as I stop or slow I lose it.

My daughter has a similar body type. To give you an idea, she is 11 years old and almost 5' 4. Basically her weight is average for her age but it's stretched out across her frame. And like her at that age, I could basically eat anything and it was like I had a hollow leg.

The main thing is, we do netflix, but we really don't want tv. i'd rather have her read Discover magazine than a teen or trash magazine. I know I can't isolate my kids from all of society nor would I want to, but it is good for the adults themselves to be good role models in what their interests are and what is important (health, versus "looks").

 

[minousbijoux]

iLander: I too know what you meant and appreciate the fact that you said something in the first place.

 

[momhappy]

Reading through the comments reminded me of this story about a Yale girl from a month or two ago: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/frances-chan/yale-eating-disorders_b_4921382.html

Wow. Thanks for posting the link to the article - very interesting.

 

[monarch64]

Reading through the comments reminded me of this story about a Yale girl from a month or two ago: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/frances-chan/yale-eating-disorders_b_4921382.html

Wow. Thanks for posting the link to the article - very interesting.

Super interesting, and proves my point that you can't tell who has an ED by their appearance.

I had an ED from 14-18. I'm 5'10" and my lowest weight was probably 140. When I was weighed on my first day of treatment and diagnosed as "anorexic with bulimic tendencies" I weighed 151. Again, you cannot tell who or who does not have an ED based on their appearance.

Thin can be beautiful, fat can be beautiful, and certainly average can be beautiful. Urban Outfitters has a "look" and it's waifish and very thin. If you don't like that look, don't shop there. Pretty simple. If all you're seeing on runways and in media is skeletal models and strange makeup and clothing, you're choosing to view one extreme.

 

[momhappy]

iLander: I too know what you meant and appreciate the fact that you said something in the first place.

It's not that I don't appreciate the topic of this thread (I do) - and this isn't a personal attack on iLander (much like JewelFreak pointed out this none of this is personal). As I said before, I actually agree with her, but maybe a little acknowledgement about how there are much better ways of getting your point across (as opposed to insulting people), would have been nice. As you can see by some of the responses here, some of us feel like some of the commentary is perpetuating the negativity that is associated with women and body image.

 

[AGBF]

I think that the arms in the first shot have to have been "photo shopped" (I am using that word to mean edited). They do not look natural. And I am the mother of a young woman with unnaturally long, thin arms. I have posted here before that my daughter was seen by five different pediatric specialists-pediatric orthopedists and geneticists-from the age of 3 years. She was tested for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and Marfan's Syndrome during all of this. The testing for Marfan's was done, in part, because of those long arms of hers!!! Her arms, when spread out- were longer in their "wingspan" than her height from head to toe. That can be a sign of Marfan's Syndrome. We were lucky that, in my daughter's case, it was not. She just has incredible long fingers, hands, toes, and arms. Her wrists are tiny and delicate.

AGBF

 

[iLander]

iLander: I too know what you meant and appreciate the fact that you said something in the first place.

Thanks, minous! And Laurie, and those that know me (and my attempts at humor) and understood my point.

A quotation sprung to mind:

"Never explain — your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyhow"
Elbert Hubbard, in The Motto Book (1907)

 

[JulieN]

I've been told to eat a cheeseburger, by an unknown woman, under her breath. I told her I love cheeseburgers!

 

[quaddio]

These comments are unkind. Also, cute dress!

 

[Nyc2chigal]

Not sure what is worse...
Girls/Women resorting to ED to achieve this look

or

Women that look like this being made fun of.

 

[iLander]

This isn't a personal thread about anyone, and not actually meant to be personal about the model. Saying it again . . .

If it helps anyone to know (and I really didn't want to go there), I too was very thin when young. I was taken to the doctor and my grandmother declared that I had "the anorexia". It lead to long, awful fights at the dinner table. In high school I was 98 lbs, and at mid life I am now a size 6.

So, am I actually "thin bashing". No.

But still I hope this woman never ends up on some teenager's wall as a "goal weight".

 

[Nyc2chigal]

You hear about such skinny women makign comments about larger women, or that nothing tastes as good as skinny feels (I think Kate Moss said this).

But then you hear the same comments thrown back towards skinny women.


I am overweight, and I have no problem with thin looking women. I'm around them constantly!


How about: Enough with the hypocrisy (making fun because you were made fun of), and take the higher road?

 

[Nyc2chigal]

This isn't a personal thread about anyone, and not actually meant to be personal about the model. Saying it again . . .

If it helps anyone to know (and I really didn't want to go there), I too was very thin when young. I was taken to the doctor and my grandmother declared that I had "the anorexia". It lead to long, awful fights at the dinner table, with substantial physical abuse. It got to the point that if someone unexpectedly put a plate of full of food in front of me, I would burst out crying. Took me years to get over it.

But I did eat everything I wanted, I was 98 lbs in high school, at 5' 5". When I got pregnant with my son, I weighed 108 lbs, and there was a lot of worry from my midwife that I didn't have enough fat to support the pregnancy. I'm now at middle age, and have settled into a size 6. So, if it helps anyone, been there, done that.

So, am I actually "thin bashing". No.

But still I hope this woman never ends up on some teenager's wall as a "goal weight".

I speak for myself in this case, but I'm sure many women feel the same way...
When I see a thin/fit woman, I realize that I should be using my full potential to be in better shape, for my health, for my family, and for the sake of finding some cute clothes that actually fit me!
Not that I want to look exactly like them, but I know that, unless you have a medical condition, no one is meant to be overweight.

We've become a lazy society. And we started making excuses for our laziness.
Heck, I know I did/do!!!!

 

[quaddio]

You hear about such skinny women makign comments about larger women, or that nothing tastes as good as skinny feels (I think Kate Moss said this).

But then you hear the same comments thrown back towards skinny women.


I am overweight, and I have no problem with thin looking women. I'm around them constantly!


How about: Enough with the hypocrisy (making fun because you were made fun of), and take the higher road?

+1

 

[momhappy]

This isn't a personal thread about anyone, and not actually meant to be personal about the model. Saying it again . . .

If it helps anyone to know (and I really didn't want to go there), I too was very thin when young. I was taken to the doctor and my grandmother declared that I had "the anorexia". It lead to long, awful fights at the dinner table. In high school I was 98 lbs, and at mid life I am now a size 6.

So, am I actually "thin bashing". No.

But still I hope this woman never ends up on some teenager's wall as a "goal weight".

I was going to share my personal story too, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it doesn't matter. This isn't about me - it's about women in general and women shouldn't make make fun of other women because we all have a hard enough time as it is.
No hard feelings though iLander - it's definitely an interesting topic and one that deserves some discussion

 

[justginger]

Ilander, for what it's worth, I am certain you meant no insult with what you said. It reminds me of how people use the word 'gay' in a negative manner without considering the true meaning. You were promoting the use of 'normal' models without realising that for some of us she IS normal (sans eating disorder, of course - that's an unsaid assumption). I spoke up because I think it's important for all women to feel as if they are beautiful in their own (healthy) skins.

 

[soocool]

To be honest, I have to wonder why this sort of commentary is okay? It's not. It's cruel and rude and serves no purpose except for making women feel bad no matter how they look.
Sure, the young woman is thin (and likely photo-shopped), but the mean comments about her appearance are unfair IMO. Some women really are that thin and it's not for others to judge. People think that just because someone is thin, then it must not be as hurtful to criticize them for their appearance and it somehow makes it okay.
What if instead of an image of a thin model in this thread, there was an image of a model that was overweight? What if the commentary reflected things like, "She looks awful" or "she needs to go on a diet"? Think about how the reactions would be different. Making women feel bad about their bodies (no matter what their size) should not be tolerated and I find some of the comments here to be quite sad. Telling a woman to eat a cookie is no more appropriate than telling a woman to go on a diet….

I applaud you! I am tall have been naturally slender all my life. So is my DD. My wrists are about 6 inches. I have long slender fingers. I have never been on a diet or have starved myself. I eat 3 meals a day and probably twice as much as the normal person. I have always been like this and I am sick and tired of people making mean comments. I grew up listening to people my parents age telling them that I must be sickly since my sister was chubby and obviously well fed. I have put many people in their place whenever they made comments about my DD's weight.

So before anyone makes derogatory comments take a long look in the mirror first and then think carefully before saying anything.

 

[soocool]

I think that the arms in the first shot have to have been "photo shopped" (I am using that word to mean edited). They do not look natural. And I am the mother of a young woman with unnaturally long, thin arms. I have posted here before that my daughter was seen by five different pediatric specialists-pediatric orthopedists and geneticists-from the age of 3 years. She was tested for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and Marfan's Syndrome during all of this. The testing for Marfan's was done, in part, because of those long arms of hers!!! Her arms, when spread out- were longer in their "wingspan" than her height from head to toe. That can be a sign of Marfan's Syndrome. We were lucky that, in my daughter's case, it was not. She just has incredible long fingers, hands, toes, and arms. Her wrists are tiny and delicate.

AGBF

I went through the same with my DD and the doctor said perhaps I should also be tested. Well DD does not have Marfans's or MASS Phenotype as the doctor thought. But DD's wrists and fingers are larger than mine. My ring size is a 4.75 hers is a 7. Good thing because she can't borrow my rings.

 

[jaysonsmom]

This reminds me of the Yale student who was told to gain weight or else she would face expulsion.

http://www.foxnews.com/health/2014/...reatened-to-suspend-her-if-didnt-gain-weight/

I felt so sorry for her....because she was forced to gorge on fatty foods (another type of eating disorder) in order to stay in school.
My mom was the same height and weight as this yale student until she hit menopause, now she is a "healthy" 5'2 and 105lbs. Some people are just slim/skinny. Get over it.


Oops, should have read all the responses before posting

 

[justginger]

My mom was the same height and weight as this yale student until she hit menopause, now she is a "healthy" 5'2 and 105lbs. Some people are just slim/skinny.

My mom is the same - she told me once that the first time she broke 100 lbs was when she was pregnant with me - and I was her SECOND pregnancy/child!

 

[partgypsy]

Yeah the first 2 years of HS I was 5 6 and weighed 99 pounds. I bulked up to 115 in college. In my 40's i'm around 125-128 and feel it is a good size. I was never given any hassle about my weight by any doctors, but both times I was pregnant they always instructed me to gain more weight. That was the one time I felt like I had an eating disorder. Getting weighed regularly, chided, forcing myself to eat food even when I was full in order to get to some magical number! I think they wanted me to get to 150 and I got to 148 or 149 so I did pretty good!

 

[AGBF]

I think that the arms in the first shot have to have been "photo shopped" (I am using that word to mean edited). They do not look natural. And I am the mother of a young woman with unnaturally long, thin arms. I have posted here before that my daughter was seen by five different pediatric specialists-pediatric orthopedists and geneticists-from the age of 3 years. She was tested for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and Marfan's Syndrome during all of this. The testing for Marfan's was done, in part, because of those long arms of hers!!! Her arms, when spread out- were longer in their "wingspan" than her height from head to toe. That can be a sign of Marfan's Syndrome. We were lucky that, in my daughter's case, it was not. She just has incredible long fingers, hands, toes, and arms. Her wrists are tiny and delicate.

I went through the same with my DD and the doctor said perhaps I should also be tested. Well DD does not have Marfans's or MASS Phenotype as the doctor thought. But DD's wrists and fingers are larger than mine. My ring size is a 4.75 hers is a 7. Good thing because she can't borrow my rings.

Can you believe that my daughter's ring size is a 3? She claims her ring size is a four or a five, but she loses any ring that isn't custom made, and even immediately lost the custom made opal ring I gave her for her sixteenth birthday. I guess I didn't have it made big enough! (See threads here on Pricescope about said ring!) No one can imagine how slim those long fingers are! Everyone says she should play the piano. And she did...when she was very, very little. But it was the cello she played for the longest time. Look at my icon and you can see how long her arms are. She was only ten years old when that photo of her was taken!

Deb

 

[AGBF]

I think that the arms in the first shot have to have been "photo shopped" (I am using that word to mean edited). They do not look natural. And I am the mother of a young woman with unnaturally long, thin arms. I have posted here before that my daughter was seen by five different pediatric specialists-pediatric orthopedists and geneticists-from the age of 3 years. She was tested for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and Marfan's Syndrome during all of this. The testing for Marfan's was done, in part, because of those long arms of hers!!! Her arms, when spread out- were longer in their "wingspan" than her height from head to toe. That can be a sign of Marfan's Syndrome. We were lucky that, in my daughter's case, it was not. She just has incredible long fingers, hands, toes, and arms. Her wrists are tiny and delicate.

I went through the same with my DD and the doctor said perhaps I should also be tested. Well DD does not have Marfans's or MASS Phenotype as the doctor thought. But DD's wrists and fingers are larger than mine. My ring size is a 4.75 hers is a 7. Good thing because she can't borrow my rings.

Can you believe that my daughter's ring size is a 3? She claims her ring size is a four or a five, but she loses any ring that isn't custom made, and even immediately lost the custom made opal ring I gave her for her sixteenth birthday. I guess I didn't have it made big enough! (See threads here on Pricescope about said ring!) No one can imagine how slim those long fingers are! Everyone says she should play the piano. And she did...when she was very, very little. But it was the cello she played for the longest time. Look at my icon and you can see how long her arms are. She was only ten years old when that photo of her was taken!

I decided that I would post the photo from which my icon was taken. I don't have a decent one, but I cobbled this together from a blue mess that what on my computer. Thank goodness for photo editing technology. My daughter looks almost human now that I worked on the photo for a while! As I said above, she was ten (10) years old when this photo was taken. Look at how long and thin her arms are. They are coming out of the sleeves of her dress because although the dress fits her otherwise, the sleeves on it are too short for her long arms. And look at those long fingers up on the cello! She could definitely give the model in the photo that started this a run a for her money...at 10!!! And this wasn't photo shopped to make her arms thinner the way the photo of the model undoubtedly was.

Deb

 

[sonnyjane]

I think that the arms in the first shot have to have been "photo shopped" (I am using that word to mean edited). They do not look natural. And I am the mother of a young woman with unnaturally long, thin arms. I have posted here before that my daughter was seen by five different pediatric specialists-pediatric orthopedists and geneticists-from the age of 3 years. She was tested for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and Marfan's Syndrome during all of this. The testing for Marfan's was done, in part, because of those long arms of hers!!! Her arms, when spread out- were longer in their "wingspan" than her height from head to toe. That can be a sign of Marfan's Syndrome. We were lucky that, in my daughter's case, it was not. She just has incredible long fingers, hands, toes, and arms. Her wrists are tiny and delicate.

I went through the same with my DD and the doctor said perhaps I should also be tested. Well DD does not have Marfans's or MASS Phenotype as the doctor thought. But DD's wrists and fingers are larger than mine. My ring size is a 4.75 hers is a 7. Good thing because she can't borrow my rings.

Can you believe that my daughter's ring size is a 3? She claims her ring size is a four or a five, but she loses any ring that isn't custom made, and even immediately lost the custom made opal ring I gave her for her sixteenth birthday. I guess I didn't have it made big enough! (See threads here on Pricescope about said ring!) No one can imagine how slim those long fingers are! Everyone says she should play the piano. And she did...when she was very, very little. But it was the cello she played for the longest time. Look at my icon and you can see how long her arms are. She was only ten years old when that photo of her was taken!

I decided that I would post the photo from which my icon was taken. I don't have a decent one, but I cobbled this together from a blue mess that what on my computer. Thank goodness for photo editing technology. My daughter looks almost human now that I worked on the photo for a while! As I said above, she was ten (10) years old when this photo was taken. Look at how long and thin her arms are. They are coming out of the sleeves of her dress because although the dress fits her otherwise, the sleeves on it are too short for her long arms. And look at those long fingers up on the cello! She could definitely give the model in the photo that started this a run a for her money...at 10!!! And this wasn't photo shopped to make her arms thinner the way the photo of the model undoubtedly was.

Deb

Growing up (heck, still now) I got made fun of because I have REALLY long arms (I can almost touch my knees - "monkey arms"!!) and giant hands and feet. I don't have Marfan's but still have people make comments. My "wingspan" is also more than my height (I'm 5'7" but have a 6'0" wingspan). I don't care now and to be honest I never cared much growing up either because those features gave me a huge advantage as a competitive swimmer in high school and college!

 

[soocool]

AGBF, your daughter is abolutely beautiful! My DDs fingers are very long and slender, but she has big knuckles. I would post a photo, but she is adamant about me not posting her photo anywhere online.

Sonnyjane, I just had to check myself and my fingertips are about 3 inches from my knees.

Anytime someone needs something retrieved from a tight spot, they call on me because of my slender long hands.

 

[Andelain]

I decided that I would post the photo from which my icon was taken.
Deb

She's beautiful!

I have the opposite problem, my arms are short enough that I have to cuff the sleeves of everything. I also have the bone structure of a moose. Even at what would be an unhealthy low weight for me, my BMI would be considered overweight.