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Need some perspective on co-worker behavior

baby monster

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So this has been floating in the background of my mind and doesn't seem to go away. I need some perspective and feedback from fellow PSers.

3 weeks ago I was running out of work on Friday night. Stopped by the restroom on way out and left my coffee travel mug there. Only realized this when I got home. On Monday, I looked around the restroom and pantry but couldn't find it so thought cleaning lady must've chuckled it. It was pretty beat up - dents and teeth marks on top, missing decorative bottom with exposed metal pieces.

Today I see a woman who sits near me with the mug. I asked if she found it and she said yes, she found it in restroom, sterilized and is using it. So I told her that I forgot it there and it's mine. She shrugged and walked away. Now I can't seem to get rid of these thoughts

A. Let it go. Finders keepers. Plus I'd never use it again knowing this woman has been using my cup.
B. Who takes a clearly used mug? So gross.
C. She didn't offer to return it when told it's mine. I know my teeth marks!
D. What is more weird - B or C?
E. Is she insane or just has a different standard of hygiene/squeamishness?
 

monarch64

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The last place I worked we had community coffee mugs/containers. We got so many freebie travel mugs from vendors, it wasn't like we were necessarily bringing our own special mugs from home and expecting no one else to use them.

You know what's grosser than using someone else's coffee mug after you've washed it? Using the same phone or keyboard a co-worker uses. Those never get cleaned. Yuck.
 

Harpertoo

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Did you actually say you wanted it back?
Not that it makes it any less odd that she is using it, but maybe she considered it abandoned and that you were just pointing out that it had been yours!? Either way, after an overnight stay in the office bathroom I'd gladly relinquish the mug.
 

missy

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LOLOL OMG. Well, truthfully I wouldn't want it back after that weirdo was using it haha. Sorry baby monster, it's really not funny but you are right-that is quite the strange and disturbing behavior. I would stay far away from her from here on in. She's sort of off.
 

baby monster

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monarch64|1394480834|3631194 said:
The last place I worked we had community coffee mugs/containers. We got so many freebie travel mugs from vendors, it wasn't like we were necessarily bringing our own special mugs from home and expecting no one else to use them.

You know what's grosser than using someone else's coffee mug after you've washed it? Using the same phone or keyboard a co-worker uses. Those never get cleaned. Yuck.
We don't have communal mugs. It's either disposable cups or your own. Yes, shared phones are icky.
 

MichelleCarmen

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missy|1394481756|3631209 said:
LOLOL OMG. Well, truthfully I wouldn't want it back after that weirdo was using it haha. Sorry baby monster, it's really not funny but you are right-that is quite the strange and disturbing behavior. I would stay far away from her from here on in. She's sort of off.

This is so naughty...but, I'd be tempted to leave really odd things nearby that woman's desk to see if she picks them up and uses them. Chewed on pencils. Half eaten candy bars. Opened but unused tea bags. :D
 

baby monster

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Harpertoo|1394481395|3631202 said:
Did you actually say you wanted it back?
Not that it makes it any less odd that she is using it, but maybe she considered it abandoned and that you were just pointing out that it had been yours!? Either way, after an overnight stay in the office bathroom I'd gladly relinquish the mug.
I didn't say out loud that I wanted it back. I consider it baseline normal behavior for person to immediately return something that another person lost and says is theirs.
 

momhappy

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I don't really see anything all that gross about it? I use dishes/silverware/glasses at restaurants that hundreds (maybe even thousands) of people have used before me…
I do, however, think that it's odd that she wouldn't offer to return it after you told her it was yours. It could be that she's rude, she doesn't care, or she's socially awkward and doesn't realize that it would be polite to return it. It could also be that she was embarrassed and thought that maybe you wouldn't want it back after she's been using it.
For the sake of keeping the peace at work, I would just let it go.
 

monarch64

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baby monster|1394481840|3631210 said:
monarch64|1394480834|3631194 said:
The last place I worked we had community coffee mugs/containers. We got so many freebie travel mugs from vendors, it wasn't like we were necessarily bringing our own special mugs from home and expecting no one else to use them.

You know what's grosser than using someone else's coffee mug after you've washed it? Using the same phone or keyboard a co-worker uses. Those never get cleaned. Yuck.
We don't have communal mugs. It's either disposable cups or your own. Yes, shared phones are icky.

The teeth marks part is killing me. And I think the weirdest part is that she didn't offer your mug back to you.
 

baby monster

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missy|1394481756|3631209 said:
LOLOL OMG. Well, truthfully I wouldn't want it back after that weirdo was using it haha. Sorry baby monster, it's really not funny but you are right-that is quite the strange and disturbing behavior. I would stay far away from her from here on in. She's sort of off.
It's funny on Seinfeld level :naughty:
 

baby monster

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MC|1394481886|3631211 said:
missy|1394481756|3631209 said:
LOLOL OMG. Well, truthfully I wouldn't want it back after that weirdo was using it haha. Sorry baby monster, it's really not funny but you are right-that is quite the strange and disturbing behavior. I would stay far away from her from here on in. She's sort of off.

This is so naughty...but, I'd be tempted to leave really odd things nearby that woman's desk to see if she picks them up and uses them. Chewed on pencils. Half eaten candy bars. Opened but unused tea bags. :D
heeheee. I like how you think :devil:
 

marymm

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I think it was just an odd conversation... if you had first said, "Hey, my mug! Where did you find it?" or "Hey, my mug! I left it in the restroom after work and I was hoping it was still in the office" - something staking ownership - I think the whole conversation would have gone differently.

People are weird, and this is a prime example - but use it as an opportunity to find a new coffee cup (stop by the Goodwill or the Dollar Store?) and use a Sharpie to put your initials on the bottom of the cup.
 

Madam Bijoux

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It definitely isn't normal for someone to take another person's coffee mug. I would forget about the mug, write the woman off as a wackadoo and never leave any of my personal property unattended again.
 

missy

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baby monster|1394482209|3631220 said:
missy|1394481756|3631209 said:
LOLOL OMG. Well, truthfully I wouldn't want it back after that weirdo was using it haha. Sorry baby monster, it's really not funny but you are right-that is quite the strange and disturbing behavior. I would stay far away from her from here on in. She's sort of off.
It's funny on Seinfeld level :naughty:

LOL totally!


MC- I love that idea. Baby monster you should totally try that! And report back here please. :cheeky:

MC said:
This is so naughty...but, I'd be tempted to leave really odd things nearby that woman's desk to see if she picks them up and uses them. Chewed on pencils. Half eaten candy bars. Opened but unused tea bags. :D
 

baby monster

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momhappy|1394482133|3631216 said:
I don't really see anything all that gross about it? I use dishes/silverware/glasses at restaurants that hundreds (maybe even thousands) of people have used before me…
I do, however, think that it's odd that she wouldn't offer to return it after you told her it was yours. It could be that she's rude, she doesn't care, or she's socially awkward and doesn't realize that it would be polite to return it. It could also be that she was embarrassed and thought that maybe you wouldn't want it back after she's been using it.
For the sake of keeping the peace at work, I would just let it go.
I think of restaurants differently bout you're right. Lots of people used silverware and dishes there before me. I'm not planning to do anything about this.
 

baby monster

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monarch64|1394482190|3631219 said:
baby monster|1394481840|3631210 said:
monarch64|1394480834|3631194 said:
The last place I worked we had community coffee mugs/containers. We got so many freebie travel mugs from vendors, it wasn't like we were necessarily bringing our own special mugs from home and expecting no one else to use them.

You know what's grosser than using someone else's coffee mug after you've washed it? Using the same phone or keyboard a co-worker uses. Those never get cleaned. Yuck.
We don't have communal mugs. It's either disposable cups or your own. Yes, shared phones are icky.

The teeth marks part is killing me. And I think the weirdest part is that she didn't offer your mug back to you.
The top is made from soft plastic and I sometimes chew on it when stressed out.
 

baby monster

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marymm|1394482307|3631223 said:
I think it was just an odd conversation... if you had first said, "Hey, my mug! Where did you find it?" or "Hey, my mug! I left it in the restroom after work and I was hoping it was still in the office" - something staking ownership - I think the whole conversation would have gone differently.

People are weird, and this is a prime example - but use it as an opportunity to find a new coffee cup (stop by the Goodwill or the Dollar Store?) and use a Sharpie to put your initials on the bottom of the cup.
It's an odd conversation but what if she said it's hers? I know it's mine but not about to get into an argument about who's teeth marks are on the cup.
 

monarch64

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baby monster|1394482631|3631229 said:
monarch64|1394482190|3631219 said:
baby monster|1394481840|3631210 said:
monarch64|1394480834|3631194 said:
The last place I worked we had community coffee mugs/containers. We got so many freebie travel mugs from vendors, it wasn't like we were necessarily bringing our own special mugs from home and expecting no one else to use them.

You know what's grosser than using someone else's coffee mug after you've washed it? Using the same phone or keyboard a co-worker uses. Those never get cleaned. Yuck.
We don't have communal mugs. It's either disposable cups or your own. Yes, shared phones are icky.

The teeth marks part is killing me. And I think the weirdest part is that she didn't offer your mug back to you.
The top is made from soft plastic and I sometimes chew on it when stressed out.

Oh I didn't mean I didn't understand about the teeth marks. I meant it's freaky that someone would use a coffee mug with someone else's noticeable teeth marks on it! :lol: I mean, nothing implies ownership like visible scars left from someone's TEETH!
 

baby monster

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Madam Bijoux|1394482369|3631224 said:
It definitely isn't normal for someone to take another person's coffee mug. I would forget about the mug, write the woman off as a wackadoo and never leave any of my personal property unattended again.
Thank you. I already bought another mug. Guess I have to initial it with permanent marker.
 

baby monster

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Update.

Around 5pm or 7 hours after initial conversation, the woman chatted me up in pantry and then asked if I wanted the mug back. Obviously not.

So odd. Sigh.
 

missy

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baby monster|1394486483|3631260 said:
Update.

Around 5pm or 7 hours after initial conversation, the woman chatted me up in pantry and then asked if I wanted the mug back. Obviously not.

So odd. Sigh.

Hmm, wonder if she posted at her forum and asked what she should do. Hahaha. At least she rethought her odd behavior and in any case you are hopefully finished dealing with her. Enjoy your new mug! And yes, make sure to mark it with your initials (teeth marks optional) this time. :bigsmile:
 

momhappy

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Maybe she's just really socially awkward (Maybe she even has a diagnosis like asperger's, etc.)? Some people have a really hard time with social cues and knowing what's appropriate/inappropriate in terms of boundaries, manners, etiquette, etc. I would like to try to give her the benefit of the doubt. I know what she did was weird, but at least it sounds like she tried to rectify the situation.
 

junebug17

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baby monster|1394486483|3631260 said:
Update.

Around 5pm or 7 hours after initial conversation, the woman chatted me up in pantry and then asked if I wanted the mug back. Obviously not.

So odd. Sigh.

Wow, very strange behavior! :roll:
 

VRBeauty

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Maybe she's got a "sterilizers - keepers" kind of philosophy?
 

Karl_K

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MC|1394481886|3631211 said:
This is so naughty...but, I'd be tempted to leave really odd things nearby that woman's desk to see if she picks them up and uses them. Chewed on pencils. Half eaten candy bars. Opened but unused tea bags. :D
ROFL!!!!!!!
yes please do this!
 
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