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Job woes...

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
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This is more of a rant than a post asking for advice, but if anyone wants to offer some input it would be most welcome.

I've just been offered a one-year temporary professorship back home, starting 5 days before my wedding :errrr:

The job pays well and it's definitely what I'd want to do long-term, but the thought of packing up and moving from here, and preparing a bunch of classes in less than two months is pretty scary. Also, it would mean FH and I would have to spend time apart every now and again as he'd have to be back here for work during that year. I know people will say that that's not so bad, but I'm not sure that as a newlywed I'd want to be apart from my husband.

Anyway, sorry for ranting and thanks for listening :wavey:
 

dragonfly411

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jun 25, 2007
Messages
7,378
Mayerling - I'd feel torn as well. You say it is a temporary professorship. If it's what you would want to do long term then yeah it's cool you get experience....but it also isn't going to last. Plus you'd be away from FH... hard choice. :(sad
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
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Mar 4, 2010
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2,357
dragonfly411|1310138444|2964665 said:
Mayerling - I'd feel torn as well. You say it is a temporary professorship. If it's what you would want to do long term then yeah it's cool you get experience....but it also isn't going to last. Plus you'd be away from FH... hard choice. :(sad

Yeah. I feel like I want to retreat to the womb. Seriously, I went to the room, got into bed, and hid under the covers. :-o
Now I'm waiting for FH to get home so we can discuss.
 

tigian

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 25, 2009
Messages
2,730
hmmmm...tough choice, mayerling. I'm sorry you have to face this decision along with having the stress of planning a wedding. How far away is the position? Is the position a rare opportunity? Would you take the position if you were already married? It will be good to hear what your DF has to say.
 

canuk-gal

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 19, 2004
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23,846
HI:

Good luck on your decision. I found the prep unbelievably time consuming--not to mention all the extra work expected. Are you doing a mat leave? This is not a tenture track position?

cheers--Sharon
 

merilenda

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 20, 2010
Messages
816
Just weighing in to say I feel for you! FI has accepted a one year professorship for this year as well. Unfortunately, it involves us moving across the country and me leaving my job.

However - the university said it was a good possibility it could be renewed and/or become a tenure track position. It's also somewhat outrageously high paying compared to other comparable positions. We've been living on my salary alone for a year (with him bringing him a little bit here and there through freelance work) and he'll be making about 1.5 times what I do. So we decided to go for it.

It is SO STRESSFUL, so I know what you're saying. I'm continuing to work fulltime until we move. We're trying to find a place to live from across the country and planning to move in less than a month. We're getting marred in 2 months.

On the plus side, I've had a couple of good phone interviews, so I'm really hopeful that I'll find work before the move or soon after we get there. Fingers crossed for both of us....it's tough out there!
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Messages
2,357
merilenda|1310149415|2964850 said:
Just weighing in to say I feel for you! FI has accepted a one year professorship for this year as well. Unfortunately, it involves us moving across the country and me leaving my job.

However - the university said it was a good possibility it could be renewed and/or become a tenure track position. It's also somewhat outrageously high paying compared to other comparable positions. We've been living on my salary alone for a year (with him bringing him a little bit here and there through freelance work) and he'll be making about 1.5 times what I do. So we decided to go for it.

It is SO STRESSFUL, so I know what you're saying. I'm continuing to work fulltime until we move. We're trying to find a place to live from across the country and planning to move in less than a month. We're getting marred in 2 months.

On the plus side, I've had a couple of good phone interviews, so I'm really hopeful that I'll find work before the move or soon after we get there. Fingers crossed for both of us....it's tough out there!

This is exactly the case for me. It will be advertised as a tenure-track position after the one year. There's no guarantee I'd get it but it's always best to have a foot in the door.
 

rosetta

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 7, 2010
Messages
3,417
I got married last week and am now facing another year living away from my husband. We work in different cities.

I feel your pain.
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
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Mar 4, 2010
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2,357
Well, 5 days have passed and they still haven't given me any definite details on salary, start dates, etc...At this point even if I wanted to, I couldn't move. There's only 3 weeks left before I have to go back home for the wedding; not enough time to stage a move.

I emailed to ask if I could start in the Spring semester. They said it would look bad on me if I didn't start straight away. I kind of feel bullied into saying yes...
 

slg47

Ideal_Rock
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Messages
9,667
mayerling|1310570450|2968043 said:
Well, 5 days have passed and they still haven't given me any definite details on salary, start dates, etc...At this point even if I wanted to, I couldn't move. There's only 3 weeks left before I have to go back home for the wedding; not enough time to stage a move.

I emailed to ask if I could start in the Spring semester. They said it would look bad on me if I didn't start straight away. I kind of feel bullied into saying yes...

do you have other job prospects?
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
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2,357
I could continue with the post I've had this year. It's part-time but at least it doesn't involve re-arranging my life in 3 weeks.
 

fleur-de-lis

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
1,343
mayerling|1310570450|2968043 said:
Well, 5 days have passed and they still haven't given me any definite details on salary, start dates, etc...At this point even if I wanted to, I couldn't move. There's only 3 weeks left before I have to go back home for the wedding; not enough time to stage a move.

I emailed to ask if I could start in the Spring semester. They said it would look bad on me if I didn't start straight away. I kind of feel bullied into saying yes...

Well, it looks bad on them that they haven't given you any definite details on salary, start dates, or the et cetera.
 

slg47

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 4, 2010
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9,667
mayerling|1310578368|2968160 said:
I could continue with the post I've had this year. It's part-time but at least it doesn't involve re-arranging my life in 3 weeks.

okay well at least you have an option. i don't think i would/could rearrange my whole life in 3 weeks. plus it seems like after the wedding you will have more time to apply for jobs
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
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Mar 4, 2010
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2,357
I'm waiting to hear on the courses I'd have to teach. I'm secretly hoping they're crap courses, just so I have another excuse to say no.
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
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Mar 4, 2010
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2,357
UPDATE

FH discussed the situation at length and decided that it really wouldn't make any sense for us to move, on such short notice, for a temporary post, when there are no guarantees that I'll get the permanent post when it comes up. And it would be really silly for us to put his job in jeopardy for a temporary thing.

Basically, we've decided to take charge of our lives and do what's best for us as a family - especially since we want to try for kids soon - and it didn't seem that this position would fulfill those goals. I notified them about my decision today - I'm actually dreading they might try to contact me about it; I really don't want to discuss it with them any more. My decision is final.

Thanks for everyone's thoughts on this. :wavey:
 

centralsquare

Ideal_Rock
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Jan 18, 2009
Messages
2,215
Congrats on making a decision. Besides all the reasons you cited, they didn't seem like people you'd want to work for!
 

mayerling

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Messages
2,357
centralsquare|1311267332|2973837 said:
Congrats on making a decision. Besides all the reasons you cited, they didn't seem like people you'd want to work for!

Yeah, FH pointed that out to me. He said that all the manipulating they've been doing so far - which I won't go into details about - is just an indication of the hell they'd put me through if I accepted.
 
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