If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in sex?

[Sha]

Just curious, and trying to get some perspective..

Please note that the poll options relate only to normal relations, not during special circumstances - like when ttc (trying to conceive), or during illness or anything like that. Men in their 40's are free to answer as well- for their own situations. Thanks!

 

[April20]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

He's interested every day. The reality of life means we're lucky if it's a couple times a week.

ETA: DH is 43. I'm not.

 

[ame]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

He's interested all the time. I am rarely interested ever at all. Both of us would rather sleep. lol

He's in his early 40s, I am in my (sob) mid 30s.

 

[SB621]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

I don't think I have met a man yet that doesn't think about sex everyday I"m not sure one even exists out there. Anyhow I can't partake in this poll since DH is in his mid-late 20's so I have a few years.

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

I don't think I have met a man yet that doesn't think about sex everyday I"m not sure one even exists out there. Anyhow I can't partake in this poll since DH is in his mid-late 20's so I have a few years.

Mine! But he's 44. I think 20-year something's are quite different. Isn't that when they say men are at their peak?

Anyway, thanks all for the responses so far!

 

[chrono]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

He would love it as many times a day as possible, everyday, all year round. Whether he gets it or not is a different subject.

 

[DNB]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

LOL. My DH is 55 and he's interested everyday. I'm 53. We've been married 32 years and he's never lacked for interest

Since the question was about 40's I didn't answer the poll.

I know of one man who wasn't interested in his 30's. My gf's ex-h. But of course, he later told her he never really loved her and left her for someone else, so that had something to do with it. I think he was getting it on the side most of their marriage so to her it appeared his drive was low.

 

[Begonia]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

DH is going to turn 49 and he's good to go every day.

I'm 46, perimenopausal, and hot or stone cold for libido = lots of variability

Wish the good Lord has synchronized our sex drives.

 

[kenny]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

You forgot to specify ... how often is he interest in sex with ME?

 

[Laila619]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Well my DH is only 36, so I can't do your poll. But he is interested all the time. I doubt that will change once he hits his 40s, but I guess you never know. Kids and life and stress do tend to get in the way of intimate time.

 

[dreamer_dachsie]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

The stereotype certainly exists that men want it all the time. And many do. But the reality is that many men have lower sex drives -- as Kenny says, people vary.

I think many men, and their spouses, do not talk about a low sex drive for the male partner because it reflects badly on the man -- he is not virile! -- and it also reflects badly on the spouse -- he/she is not attractive! Sometimes those things may be true, but I don't think its always the case that a lower male sex drive equates with a lack of masculinity or lack of desire for one's partner.

Just putting that out there, since many of the posts seem to reflect the notion that all men are horn dogs.

My husband is 35 so does not fit your poll Sha, but he would like it every day. I do have a few friends who have spouses with more modest desires. Those men's sex drives are heavily more influenced by their stress and mood. It was hard for their wizes to accept, because of the stereotype and stigma I mentioned, above.

 

[ruby59]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Did not answer your poll, but if you want a glimpse into the next decade, mine is slowing up a bit. Which is great because I am in active menopause. I would say 2 to 3 times a week at this stage.

But other things can change it up at this point, especially certain medications like for blood pressure, cholesterol, or diabetes.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

mine haven't work in the past 25 yrs...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

LOL. My DH is 55 and he's interested everyday. I'm 53. We've been married 32 years and he's never lacked for interest

Since the question was about 40's I didn't answer the poll.

I know of one man who wasn't interested in his 30's. My gf's ex-h. But of course, he later told her he never really loved her and left her for someone else, so that had something to do with it. I think he was getting it on the side most of their marriage so to her it appeared his drive was low.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

my Q is ...who are the 3 never and who are the 4 every day??...

 

[Dee*Jay]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

The four men I've had relationships with since my divorce almost three years ago have all been in their forties and have all been in the "every day" camp, so that's what I voted. Actually, time and geography permitting, make that "more than once a day" for three of four of them. Damn, it's a wonder I ever get anything done since I've stopped being married...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

The four men I've had relationships with since my divorce almost three years ago have all been in their forties and have all been in the "every day" camp, so that's what I voted. Actually, time and geography permitting, make that "more than once a day" for three of four of them. Damn, it's a wonder I ever get anything done since I've stopped being married...

DJ
you luck girl... i can't find my "viagras"

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

wonder who is the "every day" person??...

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

The stereotype certainly exists that men want it all the time. And many do. But the reality is that many men have lower sex drives -- as Kenny says, people vary.

I think many men, and their spouses, do not talk about a low sex drive for the male partner because it reflects badly on the man -- he is not virile! -- and it also reflects badly on the spouse -- he/she is not attractive! Sometimes those things may be true, but I don't think its always the case that a lower male sex drive equates with a lack of masculinity or lack of desire for one's partner.

Just putting that out there, since many of the posts seem to reflect the notion that all men are horn dogs.

My husband is 35 so does not fit your poll Sha, but he would like it every day. I do have a few friends who have spouses with more modest desires. Those men's sex drives are heavily more influenced by their stress and mood. It was hard for their wizes to accept, because of the stereotype and stigma I mentioned, above.

Agreed, Dreamer. I think low testosterone is a big factor as well. My husband is a very 'alpha-male' type of personality and I know he's attracted to me, but I believe his testosterone is on the lower side -hence the lower sex drive as well. It's something men don't want to address because like you said, it implies that they're less 'masculine' than they should be. On the ttc forum I'm on, they're quite a few women who notice the same thing with their partners, so I know I'm not the only one. But on average, seems that my OH is in the minority in terms of sex drive, which is what i suspected.

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

mine haven't work in the past 25 yrs...

I wonder what you REALLY answered, DF? ....

So you're a man around or over 40, right? Tell me, is it normal for men to lose their edge around this age?

To everyone else, thanks for the feedback! It's been helpful. Would welcome more responses, of course.

 

[perry]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Since I am older than the requested age I did not answer the survey.

But, as a guy I believe you miss an important distinction: How often is he interested vs how often is he willing to take the time for a good romp that is satisfying for both of you; or how often can he actually do it if there are health issues or low T issues.

As long as a male is healthy and heterosexual he will generally be interested every day (and that could be multiple times per day); but, reality is that life can make it difficult to have coordinated time every day for good sex with a partner (much less coordinated time for multiples per day) and thus may not express that interest directly to their partner, and they may well masturbate on a routine basis as well (to take care of the "urge", and/or sexual fantasy life may be better than real sex with spouse or SO).

If the survey covered my age range: I am interested multiple times a day.


Have a great day,

Perry

 

[missy]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

My good friend just turned 60 (Dec 30th) and he is interested in sex every single day. Really. I'm just glad I'm not his SO because who has the time and energy for sex every single day?? LOL. Ofc his gf is not interested every day so they are lucky if it's twice a month. But I digress.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

mine haven't work in the past 25 yrs...

I wonder what you REALLY answered, DF? ....

So you're a man around or over 40, right? Tell me, is it normal for men to lose their edge around this age?

To everyone else, thanks for the feedback! It's been helpful. Would welcome more responses, of course.

yes,many years ago...

 

[Dancing Fire]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

[quote="Sha|1357390663|

Agreed, Dreamer. I think low testosterone is a big factor as well. My husband is a very 'alpha-male' type of personality and I know he's attracted to me, but I believe his testosterone is on the lower side -hence the lower sex drive as well. It's something men don't want to address because like you said, it implies that they're less 'masculine' than they should be. On the ttc forum I'm on, they're quite a few women who notice the same thing with their partners, so I know I'm not the only one. But on average, seems that my OH is in the minority in terms of sex drive, which is what i suspected.[/quote]

have him eat more oysters...

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Since I am older than the requested age I did not answer the survey.

But, as a guy I believe you miss an important distinction: How often is he interested vs how often is he willing to take the time for a good romp that is satisfying for both of you; or how often can he actually do it if there are health issues or low T issues.

As long as a male is healthy and heterosexual he will generally be interested every day (and that could be multiple times per day); but, reality is that life can make it difficult to have coordinated time every day for good sex with a partner (much less coordinated time for multiples per day) and thus may not express that interest directly to their partner, and they may well masturbate on a routine basis as well (to take care of the "urge", and/or sexual fantasy life may be better than real sex with spouse or SO).

If the survey covered my age range: I am interested multiple times a day.


Have a great day,

Perry

I understand what you're saying, Perry. Thanks for responding from a male perspective. DH would be willing to romp from time to time if he needs to, but for the purposes of this poll, I'm more concerned about how interested he is in it, rather than how willing he would be to 'put out'.. , because I'm trying to see gauge how his drive itself compares to other males in his age group. I think his testosterone might be low.

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

mine haven't work in the past 25 yrs...

I wonder what you REALLY answered, DF? ....

So you're a man around or over 40, right? Tell me, is it normal for men to lose their edge around this age?

To everyone else, thanks for the feedback! It's been helpful. Would welcome more responses, of course.

yes,many years ago...

 

[kenny]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

As long as a male is healthy and heterosexual he will generally be interested every day (and that could be multiple times per day)

Huh?
Gay men have lower sex drive that straight men?
Source please.

Isn't there a widely-held stereotype that gay men are promiscuous?

 

[perry]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Kenny:

My apologies. I took the question as a female asking how often their men friends were interested in sex.

I did not consider same sex couples when I wrote the response - and have no preconception on how often they are, or are not, interested in sex (I have no idea). To me they are different than heterosexual people. The fact that they are different does not bother me (all people are different in some ways from other people); and I have a few causal friends in my mix of friends. But I have not investigated the whys or what is different in regards to sex and sex life.

Perry

 

[perry]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Lets discuss Low Testosterone.

At first I was not going to post this - but it appears there are some misconceptions on what it does and does not do.

So: It turns out that about 8 years or so I was tested and came back with Very Low T levels. The Dr's. comments at the time was it never killed anyone and brushed it off (boy I wish I knew now some of the other side effects at the time as those will kill you long term).

I went many years with Low T. I never lost my interest in sex. It did affect my abilities to have sex.

I now do T shots once per week.

In my discussion with the various Doctors it seemed normal to them that people were interested in sex but having ED issues due to Low T (not all ED is Low T related - and T Treatments do not solve all ED cases).

Hope that helps,

Perry

 

[Sha]

Re: If your OH is in his 40's how often is he interested in

Lets discuss Low Testosterone.

At first I was not going to post this - but it appears there are some misconceptions on what it does and does not do.

So: It turns out that about 8 years or so I was tested and came back with Very Low T levels. The Dr's. comments at the time was it never killed anyone and brushed it off (boy I wish I knew now some of the other side effects at the time as those will kill you long term).

I went many years with Low T. I never lost my interest in sex. It did affect my abilities to have sex.

I now do T shots once per week.

In my discussion with the various Doctors it seemed normal to them that people were interested in sex but having ED issues due to Low T (not all ED is Low T related - and T Treatments do not solve all ED cases).

Hope that helps,

Perry

Thanks for sharing that, perry! I thought Low T generally caused low drive as well - I guess that's not true in all cases.

What are some of the side effects of low T?