RaeAnn
Rough_Rock
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2004
- Messages
- 33
I think I''m going to have to turn in my membership card to the girl club... Please, if I''m crazy, tell me! lol... And if this is the wrong place for this, I apologize.
Last week, my DF ordered my e-ring from DCD, it''s the 1ct stone that I always (thought I) wanted, in a beautiful platinum setting, and now we''re waiting until the middle of next week for it to arrive. It wasn''t cheap, but it wasn''t hideously expensive either, it was a little over a month of his net salary, maybe a month and a half. We are both white-collar professionals (I''m an engineer, he''s in IT), our only debt is our mortgage, we''re able to save money on a regular basis, and he paid for the ring with cash....but I''m sitting here with this nagging guilt that maybe I didn''t **need** the 1ct stone, maybe 3/4-7/8ct would have been okay, or maybe my cut standards were too high, maybe we could have gotten by for $1000-$1500 less than what we did (to us, that''s one vacation)....
There''s a part of me that says that I most definitely deserve (I''m not ready to debate the merits of "deserve" yet--that''s a whole other issue) a carat--we''ve been together for seven years, since our early 20''s, and I''ve waited a LONG time for this proposal (and he did a bang-up job too, even without a ring). 1ct isn''t far off of what my girlfriends have (it depends on when they got engaged, those who were engaged before finishing college have smaller diamonds than those of us who waited until our late 20''s), but it''s bigger than what my sisters have (they were all married before the age of 25, nobody had much discretionary income).
Would I regret getting a smaller stone? I''m thinking that down the road I might, but I don''t know. Right now to me a carat looks huge, but 5 years from now, I''m guessing it won''t. In the long run, will that $1000-$1500 make a difference in our lives? I''m betting not. So what''s with this guilt? Anybody else feel guilty about an expensive bauble?
I normally lead a very practical life, I''ve had the same car for seven years, we''re living in a townhome that''s no bigger than we need, I take public transportation rather than pay for parking in the city (Chicago). I grew up nudging the poverty line out in farm country and watching my mom squeeze nickels until Washington''s head popped. A gorgeous e-ring, while it fits with my life right now, completely contrasts with where I''ve come from and I guess I''m torn between what I think would be awesome and the reality of money spent.
I''ve been asking myself "Is a 1ct diamond excessive?" My DF, when posed the question, said that it is, but he thinks that diamonds in general are excessive, regardless of size. And then I found the poll, which didn''t help me a whole lot! lol...
When the ring shows up, I''m hoping that I''m absolved of all my guilt, and I hope that DF has reconciled the expense with himself (he''s a fan of a $10 silver 5mm band that I''m wearing now--it''s not that he''s cheap, but he''s extremely practical) so that I can enjoy it without worrying that it will be "too big" or "too much". Am I the only one who''s felt this way? Do I _have_ to leave the girl club now?
Thanks for listening, back to your regularly scheduled programming!
Last week, my DF ordered my e-ring from DCD, it''s the 1ct stone that I always (thought I) wanted, in a beautiful platinum setting, and now we''re waiting until the middle of next week for it to arrive. It wasn''t cheap, but it wasn''t hideously expensive either, it was a little over a month of his net salary, maybe a month and a half. We are both white-collar professionals (I''m an engineer, he''s in IT), our only debt is our mortgage, we''re able to save money on a regular basis, and he paid for the ring with cash....but I''m sitting here with this nagging guilt that maybe I didn''t **need** the 1ct stone, maybe 3/4-7/8ct would have been okay, or maybe my cut standards were too high, maybe we could have gotten by for $1000-$1500 less than what we did (to us, that''s one vacation)....
There''s a part of me that says that I most definitely deserve (I''m not ready to debate the merits of "deserve" yet--that''s a whole other issue) a carat--we''ve been together for seven years, since our early 20''s, and I''ve waited a LONG time for this proposal (and he did a bang-up job too, even without a ring). 1ct isn''t far off of what my girlfriends have (it depends on when they got engaged, those who were engaged before finishing college have smaller diamonds than those of us who waited until our late 20''s), but it''s bigger than what my sisters have (they were all married before the age of 25, nobody had much discretionary income).
Would I regret getting a smaller stone? I''m thinking that down the road I might, but I don''t know. Right now to me a carat looks huge, but 5 years from now, I''m guessing it won''t. In the long run, will that $1000-$1500 make a difference in our lives? I''m betting not. So what''s with this guilt? Anybody else feel guilty about an expensive bauble?
I normally lead a very practical life, I''ve had the same car for seven years, we''re living in a townhome that''s no bigger than we need, I take public transportation rather than pay for parking in the city (Chicago). I grew up nudging the poverty line out in farm country and watching my mom squeeze nickels until Washington''s head popped. A gorgeous e-ring, while it fits with my life right now, completely contrasts with where I''ve come from and I guess I''m torn between what I think would be awesome and the reality of money spent.
I''ve been asking myself "Is a 1ct diamond excessive?" My DF, when posed the question, said that it is, but he thinks that diamonds in general are excessive, regardless of size. And then I found the poll, which didn''t help me a whole lot! lol...
When the ring shows up, I''m hoping that I''m absolved of all my guilt, and I hope that DF has reconciled the expense with himself (he''s a fan of a $10 silver 5mm band that I''m wearing now--it''s not that he''s cheap, but he''s extremely practical) so that I can enjoy it without worrying that it will be "too big" or "too much". Am I the only one who''s felt this way? Do I _have_ to leave the girl club now?
Thanks for listening, back to your regularly scheduled programming!
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