FRUSTRATED!

[sjz]

Tonight I picked up my 5 stone white gold band ring. It''s AWFUL! This same jeweler did one for me in yellow gold in the exact same setting with the exact same sized stones a few weeks ago that is perfect. The white gold ring looks nothing like the yellow gold! The stones are set uneven, the prong work is terrible (the prongs are nearly covering some of the stones) and the stones are set way too low! I was ready to cry! His assistant didn''t like the way the ring looked, and wants me to bring it back on Monday, because the jeweler doesn''t come in on weekends.

I don''t know what''s wrong. This fellow usually does very nice work. He has my .75 solitaire right now, too. He''s supposed to be swapping out the yellow gold tulipset for white gold. Now I am so worried that he is going to mess that up, too! If you don''t get the diamonds set perfectly in those tulipset mountings, they look lopsided!

I know this is not the best picture...I was using Mara''s loupe to the lens technique and got this one shot before the battery on the camera died...

. The white gold is on the top. on the far left stone, it''s really noticeable that the prongs are way to far overlapping the diamond. They all pretty much look that way. And the stones look like they are set much lower. Frustrated, frustrated, frustrated!!!!

 

[ame]

Wow what a disappointing experience! So sorry to hear that!

Who made that? Is it local to STL? (I thought you mentioned you were from here. Was curious who it might be)

 

[sjz]

The jeweler is local to me. I don't live in St. Louis, but I did guess that you were from one of your posts (you mentioned the landing...it had to be Laclede's

). I'm from Champaign, Illinois...so I'm not all that far from St. Louis. We actually visit your city quite a lot!

But don't worry, the jeweler isn't anyone local to you, so you can breathe a sigh of relief.

Now that I've outed myself as to where I live, I can do this..........GO FIGHTING ILLINI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[ame]

At lunch we watched the Salukies game and I saw part of the Illinois game last night. Since both of my teams SUCK I have to root for someone.

Well I hope it all works out. If you ever come to town let me know, maybe Patty and Lori and myself can meet up for lunch

 

[jadeleaves]

Ohh sjz that must be disappointing!

At least the assistant told you to take the ring back, so it could still be fixed. It is definitely better to speak up now rather than later.

When I got my handmade eternity ring, I wasn''t very happy with the way it was set and I did mention it to the jeweller, but was told that''s the way it is meant to be. I didn''t push it any further and am now regretting not speaking up and pushing for the ring to be remade. Everytime I look at it now, I get fustrated because all I notice are the uneven prongs, gaps between the stones and crooked stones. The stones are coming loose and ''rattling'' in the setting, and I''ve had to get the jeweller to fix it a couple of times.

*hugs* All is not lost - maybe the jeweller didn''t get to check the ring before it was given to you. Had he checked it first, judging from what you said about them usually doing nice work, maybe he would have fixed it! Let us know how you go.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 12

8:38 AM
Author: JadeLeaves
Ohh sjz that must be disappointing!

At least the assistant told you to take the ring back, so it could still be fixed. It is definitely better to speak up now rather than later.

When I got my handmade eternity ring, I wasn''t very happy with the way it was set and I did mention it to the jeweller, but was told that''s the way it is meant to be. I didn''t push it any further and am now regretting not speaking up and pushing for the ring to be remade. Everytime I look at it now, I get fustrated because all I notice are the uneven prongs, gaps between the stones and crooked stones. The stones are coming loose and ''rattling'' in the setting, and I''ve had to get the jeweller to fix it a couple of times.

*hugs* All is not lost - maybe the jeweller didn''t get to check the ring before it was given to you. Had he checked it first, judging from what you said about them usually doing nice work, maybe he would have fixed it! Let us know how you go.

Thanks for your kind words. I hope the jeweler can fix it. When I picked it up, the sales lady that got it from the vault for me didn''t even look at it. She just handed it to me still in the little plastic ziplock bag thingy. The jeweler''s assistant, who happens to be a friend of mine, saw me from the other side of the store and wanted to see how the ring turned out. She''s been in on this project with me from the begining. I just happened to be wearing the yellow gold ring when I picked up the white gold ring, and we were able to compare them side by side. The white gold just did not look right to either one of us. On the yellow gold ring, all the stones are evenly spaced, the prongs look pretty much the same from stone to stone, and overall the ring has a look of uniformity. The white gold ring is a mess! I know it''s hard to tell from the crappy picture I posted, but the stones look uneven, the some of the prongs look bigger than others and overlap the stones too much, and the ring generally looks to be of lesser quality and almost like the stones are much smaller.

The sad thing is...if I hadn''t already had the yellow gold ring to compare it to...I might have been given this ring and been none the wiser! With the naked eye, the ring just looks kind of "off". But when you look at it with the loupe, you can see all of the irregularities very plainly. The assistant was the one who first looked at it under the loupe and identified the problem. Then I took a look, and it was really obvious to me as well.

 

[jadeleaves]

Date: 3/19/2005 12:39:28 AM
Author: sjz
The sad thing is...if I hadn't already had the yellow gold ring to compare it to...I might have been given this ring and been none the wiser! With the naked eye, the ring just looks kind of 'off'. But when you look at it with the loupe, you can see all of the irregularities very plainly. The assistant was the one who first looked at it under the loupe and identified the problem. Then I took a look, and it was really obvious to me as well.

I hear ya! I was also unhappy because I have all these beautiful signed pieces and WF eternity rings (on PS) to compare mine to. When the jeweller told me that was the way it has to be, I thought to myself, 'uh.. don't think so!' but i figured he's the expert, so maybe he's right. To this day, I am kicking myself for not insisting on a remake.

Hope your ring gets fixed soon!

 

[Patty]

Aw, too bad that they didn''t do a great job on this one like they did on the first one.

The stones do look smaller in the white gold. And I think I can see what you mean about the prongs going too far over the stone on the one diamond.

How disappointing!

 

[Mara]

tell them you are unhappy and want it redone...you should be ecstatic with custom work, not disappointed. i would also point out the differences between your YG and the new one...i''m sure it will be fixable. good luck!

 

[elepri]

I''m sorry you were disappointed with your band. I just went through the same thing with mine from SP and decided to return it because i wasn''t happy with the quality. The stones do look a bit smaller in the top band and the prongs seem to be uneven in both bands. I hope you jeweler can fix it. I had no idea it''s so hard to get a diamond band that looks great.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 5

7:13 PM
Author: Mara
tell them you are unhappy and want it redone...you should be ecstatic with custom work, not disappointed. i would also point out the differences between your YG and the new one...i''m sure it will be fixable. good luck!

I am going to make sure they do something, but I''m not exactly sure what, yet. I am leery of having them redo this ring. The prongs are very tiny to begin with, and I know from past experience that often a "redo" looks worse than the original botch-job. I hate that this happened, because this jeweler has done good work for me in the past. And I was hoping to continue working with him to set other stones for me.


I am tempted to ask him to start over with a new mounting. It was relatively inexpensive in the first place. His assistant told me that there would be no charge for resetting the stones, but I don''t know if I can get them to go for buying me a whole new mounting. I really don''t think that I should have to pay twice for mistakes that weren''t mine.

I know when stones are set in prongs, the prongs are cut with different sized burrs to make a seat for the stone. I''m worried that they will never look right if he tries to reset the stones in the existing prongs. I just don''t know...

Today, I am just exasperated enough to try and get my money back and cool my jets for a while and basically not have this ring made at this time. I''ve been having "technical difficulties" with other jewelry lately, too. The vatche setting I got from WF had some issues, so that ring had to be sent back AGAIN (I already had to send it back once for re-sizing because it was too big the first time). My ering diamond is at the jeweler, too...being switched out from yellow gold to white. It''s the same fellow who did the poor setting of the band ring, so I''m nervous!

So right now, I''m sitting here without some of my best baubles, and stressing over them to boot. I am way too materialistic, these days...[$$)] You''d think I''d have better things to worry about...LOL! But I DON''T

I guess the worst of it is that I had the original big cluster ring given to me by my MIL that I''ve basically sat on for all these years,too chicken to dismantle it and spoil the sentimental value of it. Now that I''ve taken the plunge and done it, things aren''t turning out as I had hoped. And it''s taking so many weeks, with so many delays and everything along the way. Waiting for mountings, waiting for the jeweler to have time, then he goes on vacation, then he gets sick, then he messes up one of the rings

Ok, pity party is over...for now.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 5:40

7 PM
Author: elepri
I''m sorry you were disappointed with your band. I just went through the same thing with mine from SP and decided to return it because i wasn''t happy with the quality. The stones do look a bit smaller in the top band and the prongs seem to be uneven in both bands. I hope you jeweler can fix it. I had no idea it''s so hard to get a diamond band that looks great.

I know, under magnification the prongs on neither band look perfect. But to be honest, I am very much the perfectionist and I''ve obssesively looked at all of my jewelery through a loupe zillions of times. Not a single one of my rings has "perfect" prongs. As long as they look good to me with my naked eye, I''m fine. It''s when they look uneven, lopsided, or wierd to my naked eye that I get crazy. The band in yellow gold looks very clean, even, and uniform with an unaided eye. The white one does not. Some of the diamonds look tilted, the prongs look very "disorganized" like they aren''t even the same size. I noticed that the ring didn''t look right the second she handed it to me, before I even compared it to my other ring. They were supposed to be identical. They most definetly are not identical. I now wish that I had done channel set bands. I have one channel set band that has several horizontal rows of channel set stones. It is the closest thing to perfection in a ring that I own!

The worst thing about dealing with this jeweler is that he is never available to speak with in person. I guess you would have to say that he is illusive. Whenever I go to the shop, he''s either just left, hasn''t come in yet, or is not going to be in for a few days. He does his benchwork outside the shop, and I''ve never been to his workshop. Communication with him is almost exclusively through a third party (one of his assistants). This can all be so frustrating!

At this point, I am even suspicious that he didn''t set the stones in this ring himself. I know that there have been a couple of other jewelers working out of this shop lately, because my guy was in South America for a couple of weeks, and just got back this week. I purposely waited to have this ring set because I wanted him, and not the guys who were filling in for him. I was TOLD that it was him that set my stones, but I have no way to verify this. It does seem unusual for him to have done such sloppy work. The other work he''s done for me has been much better than this example.

 

[jadeleaves]

Date: 3/19/2005 7:25:57 PM
Author: crankydave
When I have had a job go out that is not as good as it should have been. I apologize, take care of the problem, and hope the client allows me the opportunity to work with them in the future. Everybody has a bad day. It doesn''t make me a bad jeweler, just human.
Dave

That is admirable - if my jeweller had done that I might have still gotten them to custom make my recent projects. It is not so much the final product that leaves much to be desired, but the attitude that was projected afterwards that made me leery of using them again.

That said, I don''t think they''ll miss my business.

Sjz - judging from what you''ve said, it does sound like maybe your usual jeweller didn''t set your new 5 stone ring. I don''t know if a redo would look worse, but they seem to be more than happy to fix it up - maybe let them know your misgivings about getting it ''fixed'' as oppposed to getting a new one made??

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 7:25:57 PM
Author: crankydave
I hate that this happened, because this jeweler has done good work for me in the past. And I was hoping to continue working with him to set other stones for me.

When I have had a job go out that is not as good as it should have been. I apologize, take care of the problem, and hope the client allows me the opportunity to work with them in the future. Everybody has a bad day. It doesn''t make me a bad jeweler, just human.

Dave

I know. It''s just that I''m probably not even going to have the opportunity to discuss this with the jeweler. The only people I ever get to talk to are his assistants or the sales people. For the most part, they have been pretty good about relaying my requests and concerns. On another job, I saw that the culet of one of the diamonds was chipped after it had been set. When I went back and asked them to take that stone out of the setting and replace it with another, it was done no questions asked. I''m not really an unreasonable person. It''s just that I was a little shocked at how much different this ring looked than the one he did for me a few weeks ago. It was the identical mounting, only in white instead of yellow gold, and the same sized diamonds that he used in the other ring. I was expecting it to look the same, and it didn''t. And I have waited for a number of weeks and had several postponements with this particular ring. I guess it was just a really big let down after all the anticipation.

 

[Jennifer5973]

This is simple: take the rings back, show them the differences between the well made YG one and the WG version and ask to have the WG ring rectified. Period.

It sounds like they will make it right. They''ve worked with you in the past and it''d be foolish for them to lose a repeat customer. Good luck--pls let us know what happens!

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 7:38:33 PM


Sjz - judging from what you''ve said, it does sound like maybe your usual jeweller didn''t set your new 5 stone ring. I don''t know if a redo would look worse, but they seem to be more than happy to fix it up - maybe let them know your misgivings about getting it ''fixed'' as oppposed to getting a new one made??

You know, since I''ve been discussing this with all of you on this thread, I''m really thinking more and more strongly that''s probably what happened. Maybe he was so behind from being gone for a few weeks, that he delegated my ring to one of the other jewelers. When the assistant looked at my ring, she immediately said that the jeweler usually does much better work, and that she was suprised that the ring looked the way that it did. It was her suggestion that I bring it back next week and have the jeweler do something about it. I had another ring that I took in for repair while he was gone, and they asked me to wait and bring it in when he came back from vacation. The assistants said that the substitute jewelers were good, but that the regular guy was much better and they thought I would be happier if he took care of it. So I waited. Unfortunately he wasn''t able to repair the ring I took in, either

That''s another thing that''s got me down. The ring I had him look at is a princess cut invisible set diamond cluster ring that I''ve had for a long time. It was one of my favorite rings, and my daughter''s favorite ring. I was going to give it to her someday. Somehow, I chipped two of the diamonds, and NO ONE will even attempt to fix it! I cannot believe that no jeweler can fix an invisible set ring. Why did they even make them if they aren''t fixable? It was purchased at a mall store that has long since gone out of business, so I can''t take it back there to be repaired. My husband took it to a couple of people who said if I didn''t buy it at their store, they wouldn''t fix it. Now this. I guess it''s not my week! And to top it off, I had surgery on my arm this week, and it hurts...WAAAAAHHHHH

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/19/2005 10:19:32 PM
Author: Jennifer5973
This is simple: take the rings back, show them the differences between the well made YG one and the WG version and ask to have the WG ring rectified. Period.

It sounds like they will make it right. They''ve worked with you in the past and it''d be foolish for them to lose a repeat customer. Good luck--pls let us know what happens!

Oh, I''m going to take the ring in on Monday. The assistant told me that both she and the store manager would be there. I''m betting the jeweler won''t be, I jokingly call him the INVISIBLE MAN...lol.

He is supposed to have my ering done by Monday, so I''m hoping to pick that up when I go in. I''m sure it will be fine, but now I''m nervous about that ring, too. I''ll let you all know how it turns out. And if he makes the ring right, I''ll try and post some pictures so you can see that, too. You guys have all been so nice. I was kind of nervous about posting a "gripe". Believe it or not, I''m usually a very upbeat, optimistic person. I am sort of surprised at myself for getting so worked up over this. A little embarassed, too. But it did help to get if off my chest. I am so glad I found PS. Most of my friends and family don''t "get" my obsession with diamonds and jewelry. If I had carried on about this to them, I can hear them now..."step awaaaaayyyy from the ring!"

 

[ame]

There''s a jeweler here you should check out, I know Patty''s guy is great, and I visited one of the best platinumsmiths around a few weeks back and I think Ill be taking my repairs there if I need to. If you know where Manchester Rd is you can get there easily. IF you don''t like your guy''s work it''s an option. I know a lot of big-name shops send their work to him.

 

[sjz]

Well, I took my ring back to the jeweler''s today. Big surprise, the jewelerwho set my ring wasn''t there!

. The assistant and the manager were there though, as promised. The manager just looked at the ring, without even using the loupe and said the ring looked different because the diamonds were much smaller...uhhh, I DON''T THINK SO! All of the diamonds came from the same original cluster ring, and they were all .20 carats. I pointed out that If the diamonds ARE smaller, somebody must have switched them out (which, btw, I don''t think happened!). The assistant at least stood up for me and advocated for me with the manager. She told her that SHE thought that the diamonds were poorly set. Finally, the manager took out the loupe, but only after I suggested it. Then she was able to see that the prongs were overlapping the stones too much. Some of the prongs were even overlapping onto the table of a couple of the stones and the stones were set lower than on my other ring. She still insisted that some of the diamonds were probably smaller...but lucky for me, I had my original appraisal, done by HER that stated otherwise...lol!

Soooooo, they are going to send the ring back to the jeweler to try and make it look right. I am still doubtful at this point if it can be done, but I''m giving him the chance to try and correct the issues. He still didn''t have my solitaire set, either...major bummer. So, that''s where I stand now. Keep your fingers crossed for me that he''s able to make the ring look the way I want it to look.

 

[Patty]

Wow, what a mess! This jeweler sounds like the Wizard of Oz, hiding behind the curtain!

How rude of her to insist that the stones were smaller. And good for you on showing her the appraisal that SHE did. Wow, it makes me want to

at her.

Good luck. I hope that they get it right for you.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/21/2005 7:37:32 PM
Author: Patty
Wow, what a mess! This jeweler sounds like the Wizard of Oz, hiding behind the curtain!

How rude of her to insist that the stones were smaller. And good for you on showing her the appraisal that SHE did. Wow, it makes me want to

at her.

Good luck. I hope that they get it right for you.

Thanks, Patty. I hope they get it right, too. I don''t know what I''ll do if it still doesn''t look right.

I''m in a strange position. Not that I''m any kind of expert, but I know more about diamonds and jewelery than the average shopper I think. I am also one of those people who looks a LOT younger than I really am. I''m sure the way I dress doesn''t help matters, either. Not that I dress shabby or anything...but I don''t dress like a 40-something professional woman if you know what I mean. I mostly wear jeans or khakis, casual sweaters, and boots. A lot of times, people in jewelery stores will tell me the most amazing CRAPPOLA!!! Like they think I''m too young or guillible to know that they are telling me such crappola. Sometimes it amuses me, and sometimes (like today) it makes me MAD!

. I''ve had salesmen at car dealerships try to pull the same thing on me. I don''t like it then, either.

I don''t normally do this, but I was exasperated enough to casually let it drop into the conversation that my husband was a doctor, and that he buys me quite a bit of jewelery...but I might have to reconsidereven WANTING any more jewelry after this experience.

I noticed a bit of a change in her attitude after that...LOL! I guess I''ll just have to see what happens next.

 

[FireGoddess]

Somehow I missed this thread...

I can''t believe some of the BS the manager tried to pull and thought she could get away with! Like telling you the stones were smaller? I''m so glad you had the appraisal, done by her no less, that stated otherwise. Cr@p like that really irks me. People like that really irk me.

Good luck with the redo...I hope it comes out just as nice as the first one. If it doesn''t, I suggest either finding out who exactly set the first ring and demanding that only that person do it, or tell them to give the stones back and take your business elsewhere. Good luck...

 

[sevens one]

I hope they get it right for you. Custom work is so nerve-racking. Hang in there.

 

[jadeleaves]

It''s amazing the kind of stunt some people would pull just to pass the buck onto someone/something else!

I find it quite amusing when some people''s attitude changes towards you just because they realised their mistake and that despite your attire, you can probably buy up the entire shop

- why does the level of service goes up and down according to THEIR perception of your disposable income?

Argh!!

I hope your ring gets fixed soon! *hugs*

 

[Camellia]

Date: 3/21/2005 11:25:48 PM
Author: JadeLeaves

It''s amazing the kind of stunt some people would pull just to pass the buck onto someone/something else!

I find it quite amusing when some people''s attitude changes towards you just because they realised their mistake and that despite your attire, you can probably buy up the entire shop

- why does the level of service goes up and down according to THEIR perception of your disposable income?

Argh!!

I hope your ring gets fixed soon! *hugs*

Doesn''t sound like a very wise business person if they are going quibble about the colour of your money.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/22/2005 4:23:48 PM
Author: Camellia

Date: 3/21/2005 11:25:48 PM
Author: JadeLeaves

It''s amazing the kind of stunt some people would pull just to pass the buck onto someone/something else!

I find it quite amusing when some people''s attitude changes towards you just because they realised their mistake and that despite your attire, you can probably buy up the entire shop

- why does the level of service goes up and down according to THEIR perception of your disposable income?

Argh!!

I hope your ring gets fixed soon! *hugs*

Doesn''t sound like a very wise business person if they are going quibble about the colour of your money.

I don''t think it''s that they don''t want your money...I think some sales people are conditioned to think that "certain" people can''t afford their merchandise. For instance, if a 22 year old guy walks into an upscale jewelery store wearing jeans and sneakers and a college sweatshirt and starts looking at $20K diamond rings, they might not pay as much attention to him and give him quite the level of service that they would give a 40-something executive looking fellow wearing and expensive suit and italian leather shoes! It''s not right, but that''s life. Most sales people would just "assume" that the 22 year old wouldn''t ever be able to afford an expensive ring, whereas the executive type actually might.

My husband and I don''t normally go around telling people that he''s a doctor. But if someone, like a sales person or a restaurant staff know him or find out...it''s "Dr. this, and Dr. that!". It''s like we get better treatment because of it. I''m sort of shy, and it kind of embarasses me, so I don''t normally go around "bragging". But my husband used to be on TV for several years as a medical correspondent, and a lot of people locally know who he is. Lots of times when I''m shopping or in a restaurant, I''ll sign the check or whatever and people will notice the name (it''s an unusual last name in our area) and they will ask "are YOU Dr. Z''s wife?" If I tell them I am, I often notice that their attitude towards me becomes more solicitious.

On another thread, the question was asked about why female celebrities don''t often wear their rings. Ones of the answers was that a lot of famous designers and jewelers either give them things to wear, or let them "borrow" it. It''s true to a large extent. Not that my husband is a celebrity (well, maybe a MINOR one) but the fact that he was on TV, and that he''s a doctor that has treated a lot of peole in our community over the years has earned a quite a few perks. We''ve been given free meals in restaurants, gift certificates by different stores, free services at our car dealership and things along those lines. We also get a lot of professional courtesies. I''ve been offered free and discounted cosmetic surgery by a couple of the local plastic surgeons (not that I need it

), we''ve also had our ER charges and things written off, and things like that. I have also been given the royal treatment when I''ve had to be hospitalized, and other of my family members have been given top priority by the local doctors and hospitals. We don''t take any of that kind of thing for granted, and to sort of even the balance, we are way generous to charities and do a lot both financially and by donating our time and services to our church, schools, and community. I don''t want to come off sounding like I''m bragging, because I''m not. But sometimes who you are, how you dress, and how wealthy you are (or are PERCIEVED to be) really does make a difference in how you are treated by other people. It doesn''t make it right, but that''s life in our society. I will never go out of my way to LOOK wealthy or try to flaunt myself in order to be given special treatment by anyone. BUT... it makes me mad when people don''t take notice of me, patronize me, or try to lie to me just because they don''t think I''m smart enough or in a certain social or economic class.

 

[Camellia]

I have to disagree with you sjz. As long as people say ''that''s just the way it is, that''s life'', nothing in this world will ever change for the better. It''s pure snobbery for shops to decide who is worthy of their attention and who isn''t. The person wearing the designer clothes may be on the verge of bankruptcy, while the ''ordinary'' person may be very good at investing their money. I would have thought that a wise business person would be interested in developing customer relations so that people come back again and refer their friends to them. Anyway, isn''t that what capitalism is all about: you have money to spend, I have the goods/services you desire - we do business.

 

[sjz]

Date: 3/22/2005 8:24:32 PM
Author: Camellia
I have to disagree with you sjz. As long as people say ''that''s just the way it is, that''s life'', nothing in this world will ever change for the better. It''s pure snobbery for shops to decide who is worthy of their attention and who isn''t. The person wearing the designer clothes may be on the verge of bankruptcy, while the ''ordinary'' person may be very good at investing their money. I would have thought that a wise business person would be interested in developing customer relations so that people come back again and refer their friends to them. Anyway, isn''t that what capitalism is all about: you have money to spend, I have the goods/services you desire - we do business.

Disagree all you like. I dare you to walk into Tifanny''s or BB&B wearing old levi''s and a sweatshirt, carrying a Walmart handbag and see how all the sales people jump through hoops for you. They won''t. Do you remember the movie "PRETTY WOMAN"? When the Julia Roberts character, who was a low-rent hooker, was sent into the hoity-toity shops on Rodeo Drive by the Richard Gere character? They wouldn''t give her the time of day. Later in the movie, after the concierge had helped her to obtain the "right" clothes and learn to be a bit more proper...she went back to those same stores and they fell all over themselves to wait on her. I didn''t make the rules, or decide how people in society are going to act. But I am a realist.

I''ve noticed many many times in my life how the way I dress or the type of jewelery I wear (or don''t wear) affects the way I''m treated by sales staff. When I''m shopping at the mall, wearing my usual casual attire of jeans and a sweater, especially if I''m wearing little or no jewelry, it''s much harder to attract the attention of the sales staff. They also don''t "compliment" me, or fawn over me much, if at all. Conversely, on the rare occasions that I have been shopping while more dressed up and wearing my diamonds (like after church or after an audition or that type of thing where I am required to wear something nicer than my usual jeans) I''ve got sales staff practically jumping over the counter to be of service to me. They are much more attentive and complimentary, as well. I''ve noticed the same thing when they find out that I''m a doctor''s wife. Even if I am wearing old clothes and my "mowing shoes", they all of a sudden have a different attitude. I''ll bet if I told them that my husband worked as a gas station attendant they wouldn''t be so impressed. It isn''t right, and it isn''t fair. And I understand where you are coming from about people wearing the designer clothes being on the verge of bankrupcy. But very little of what goes on in this society is "the way it should be". Despite what we would all like, there is predjudice, there are people that are superficial and only judge people by what they see on the surface, and there are people that are more impressed by "flash" over substance.

All that being said, I don''t really care what other people think of me. I never have. But I don''t like being patronized or treated as if I''m any less special than the next person. I could afford more and bigger diamonds, but so far have chosen not to buy them. I could afford to wear different clothing than I wear on a day to day basis. But I don''t feel the need to wear designer outfits and carry $500 handbags. I''m fine with my levi''s and my sak purse. But people do judge me (and you and everyone else) by the size of their diamond, by the brand of clothing they wear, by the style of their haircut, and many many other superficial things that really don''t tell the true intelligence, wealth, or class of the person.

 

[sjz]

Now, on a completely different note...I heard back about my ring today. A sales girl from the store called me this evening to tell me that my ring could be picked up. I was taken aback, since I only dropped it off yesterday afternoon, and I was under the impression that the jeweler would even get it until today. Add that to the fact that someone that I had not even been dealing with was the one who called. I asked her what they had done to fix my ring. She put me on hold for quite a while. When she came back on the line, she said that the manager had asked her to tell me that the jeweler had unfortunately been unable to do anything to fix the ring. I asked to speak to the manager, but was told she was "busy with another customer". By this time I was burning. I asked the girl on the phone (I say girl because she sounded very young) if the jeweler had indicated WHY he couldn''t fix the ring. She said she didn''t know.

You guys don''t know how upset I am. This isn''t just about a ring. If that''s all it was, I''d write it off to a bad experience and money thrown down the drain. The thing that is upsetting me is that I feel that the staff at this store is jerking me around. On top of that, I took apart an heirloom ring given to me by my MIL, whom I loved very much and has since passed away. If I had known things would turn out like this, I would have never undertaken this whole remount project! My husband was never all that gung-go about this whole thing from day one. I think he kind of hated to see me take apart his mother''s ring, but he also wanted me to be happy. And he knew that I almost never wore the ring in it''s original form. Now he wants me to go back and have the jeweler put ALL the stones back into his mother''s original ring and be done with it. I don''t know what to do! I feel so bad getting all worked up over a piece of jewelery when there are so many more serious things going on in the world, but I am, and I can''t help it. Right now I''m sick of jewelry and am ready to just put on my plain gold wedding band and my little gold ball stud earrings and give up on diamonds forever! OK, not really...just being a drama queen. But I am distraught.

 

[Patty]

Oh, sjz, that STINKS! I can''t imagine why they would not fix the ring so that it looks acceptable to you. I mean, they made one ring well, surely they can do it again?! It sounds like that manager is a witch. Did you pay for the ring? If so, I''d ask for a refund or dispute the credit card if you paid for it with a card.

Do not give up on your projects. I don''t blame you for wanting to re-do your MIL''s ring so that you have more wearable items. You just need to find another jeweler who has high standards and will do their best for you. I''m sorry that this has happened to you.