CedarRapids
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2011
- Messages
- 146
Did s/he always stretch the truth, exaggerate, hide information?
Are you as forthcoming?
Are you as forthcoming?
Jennifer W|1324996579|3089216 said:Never. He's the only person I ever met who is totally honest but never brutal or unkind.
Haven|1325008183|3089352 said:It was important to me to find a man who is brutally honest. My father is a compulsive liar, so I'm pretty sure that's why I care about it so much. It's really difficult to live with someone who lies, in the end it become habit to never trust a word he says. I can't have that in my marriage.
kenny|1325019554|3089519 said:Would you say it is a lie or a fib to tell a small child that Santa or the tooth fairy is real?
CharmyPoo|1325049828|3089838 said:We are very honest with each other. The only time he "fibs" is when he is trying to hide his computer gaming because I hate it.
TristanC|1325053267|3089873 said:CharmyPoo|1325049828|3089838 said:We are very honest with each other. The only time he "fibs" is when he is trying to hide his computer gaming because I hate it.
Hmm, please don't take it the wrong way, but perhaps you should find a way to accept that it is a cheap and painless hobbby for him?
I say this because I know of someone who couldn't game freely after this marriage, and of all things, this was the one that altered his perception of how things would work out in the long run. Not that the gaming itself was a huge deal, but that cuts both ways.
Addy|1325079867|3089946 said:TristanC|1325053267|3089873 said:CharmyPoo|1325049828|3089838 said:We are very honest with each other. The only time he "fibs" is when he is trying to hide his computer gaming because I hate it.
Hmm, please don't take it the wrong way, but perhaps you should find a way to accept that it is a cheap and painless hobbby for him?
I say this because I know of someone who couldn't game freely after this marriage, and of all things, this was the one that altered his perception of how things would work out in the long run. Not that the gaming itself was a huge deal, but that cuts both ways.
As a previous WOW widow, I'd say it depends on how much. SO was gaming to the point where it was a problem. It may have been cheap and painless for him, but it wasn't for me and therefore wasn't to us. I near enough forced a cut back. He then did the rest on his own and quit cold turkey one day. I don't mind some gaming, but anytime he was sitting around which resulted in several evenings of me being alone was too much. We agreed to 2 evenings a week and after about a year of that he quit WOW. He plays some computer games still, but nothing quite as involved as WOW.
CharmyPoo|1325090927|3090050 said:Addy|1325079867|3089946 said:TristanC|1325053267|3089873 said:CharmyPoo|1325049828|3089838 said:We are very honest with each other. The only time he "fibs" is when he is trying to hide his computer gaming because I hate it.
Hmm, please don't take it the wrong way, but perhaps you should find a way to accept that it is a cheap and painless hobbby for him?
I say this because I know of someone who couldn't game freely after this marriage, and of all things, this was the one that altered his perception of how things would work out in the long run. Not that the gaming itself was a huge deal, but that cuts both ways.
As a previous WOW widow, I'd say it depends on how much. SO was gaming to the point where it was a problem. It may have been cheap and painless for him, but it wasn't for me and therefore wasn't to us. I near enough forced a cut back. He then did the rest on his own and quit cold turkey one day. I don't mind some gaming, but anytime he was sitting around which resulted in several evenings of me being alone was too much. We agreed to 2 evenings a week and after about a year of that he quit WOW. He plays some computer games still, but nothing quite as involved as WOW.
TristanC - Unless you have really been in the shoes of having a true gaming addict spouse, you won't really understand what I am talking about. It is by no means a cheap and painless hobby - it is far worse than xbox or playstation. Computer games have ruined many healthy lives and relationships. People have even lost jobs and their health over it. Computer games can be a true addiction. I am not offended but unless you have been in those shoes .. you simply wouldn't understand how bad it can be. For us, gaming in itself is a huge deal - for me, it was almost as bad as a drug addiction .. and thankfully for me, he actually understands and sees it as a problem too.
Addy - I have known my husband for 15 years and he has been seriously into computer games (be it warcraft, starcraft, wow .. and now star wars) to different degrees. I can't agree with you more and it wasn't a cheap and painless hobby for me. When we were dating, we actually ended our relationship because he was playing for over 10+ hours a day at 7 days a week. He did quit after the break up and we got back together. He managed to contain the gaming for the past few years and it is actually easier with WOW given that it is not a "builder" game. We have an agreement on 2 hours of games a day.
Addy|1325092998|3090075 said:I remember several evenings of preparing dinner to him saying "I'll help in just a minute" or "I'll come to eat in just a minute" and I ended up plopping a plate of cold food on his computer desk a couple of hours later. It was a get home at 6-7pm and play until 1-2am nearly everyday type of thing. Anytime I took a bit longer to get ready and the computer was already on, I would loose him to the gaming. I watched a lot of CSI reruns, started baking, and taught myself to sew. In the end our agreement was 2 nights a week from 7pm to 12 midnight. That seemed suitable for a hobby to us at the time. We found that once the computer was on and the game started that it was too easy to go to during any down time for him so the certain nights over amount of hours per nights were a huge help.
I do sympathize with you. It's not so much the gaming itself for me, and it sounds like you're similar. For me, it's the loss of hours on end every evening, the complete lack of help or ability to pause it to take care of anything else, and the lying about when it'll end. I started to hate "I'll be there in just a minute."