Do You Like Kids?

[iLander]

I don't like kids, really. I think of them as people, and some I like as individuals, some I do not. I like my own kids (most of the time, lol) but I don't think of kids - as an en masse group - as adorable. I approach kids the same way I do adults; with a wait and see attitude. I don't give them an automatic "like" because they're little.

There I finally said it. When I was young, it was heresy for a woman to admit that. The generation before mine, I think some women were considered insane for that opinion. I feel especially bad for that generation, because they didn't have birth control.

Some people seem to feel that all kids, even those that they don't personally know, are adorable. They like TV commercials with kids, pictures of kids, etc.

Are you one of those people?

No judgement, just curious.

 

[telephone89]

In general, no. I don't have my own kids. I have neices and nephews, and most of the time I think they are adorable, but I don't have to be around them much. I feel like, if I know the kids then I like them more. For example, one of my co-workers brought in her boy, who is around 6 mon. He was smiley and giggling and happy, and that also very much helped. I don't like crying/screaming/tantrum kids. One of my worst nightmares is being in airplane with a screaming child.

Everyone knows I don't love children actually haha. One of our other co-workers was away when the child was brought in, and everyone like 'OMG you missed out, he was SOOO ADORABLE' and she looked at me and was like 'Ok, how was he really' haha. So I feel you. But, you might have more experience having your own kids that I lack.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first. I teach sunday school, and my husband coaches a lot of my kid's sports. We are generally well-loved by the kids we interact with. I even find something to love and praise in the most annoying and misbehaved kids. If money were no object, I would have had more than the 2 wehave. I imagine my husband and I fostering kids once our own are grown and out of the house.

 

[canuk-gal]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first.

You do this too? lol

I do like kids. Truly!

cheers--Sharon

 

[kenny]

There have been exceptions but generally, no I don't like kids.
I don't like to be around them.
I hate hearing my next door neighbors two little girls screaming and yelling constantly in their house and in their yard.

I resent parents who do not control their kids in public ... ESPECIALLY ... the parents who think it's harmful to guide/correct/teach/discipline their kids.

Well-behaved kids are okay, but rare.

I share the blame.
I found out in therapy my discomfort around kids is related to my own childhood of abuse.
I'm pretty sure that, subconsciously, kids bring me back to that time.

 

[chrono]

In general, I do not like to be around children. I do not view most of them as cute or adorable like most women do. My friends and family thought I was crazy to think this way, but then again, I am not sociable in the first place.

 

[iLander]

There have been exceptions but generally, no I don't like kids.
I don't like to be around them.
I hate hearing my next door neighbors two little girls screaming and yelling constantly in their house and in their yard.

I resent parents who do not control their kids in public ... ESPECIALLY ... the parents who think it's harmful to guide/correct/teach/discipline their kids.

Well-behaved kids are okay, but rare.

I share the blame.
I found out in therapy my discomfort around kids is related to my own childhood of abuse.
I'm pretty sure that, subconsciously, kids bring me back to that time.

Well, let's ask the kid likers about their childhoods.

 

[iLander]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first. I teach sunday school, and my husband coaches a lot of my kid's sports. We are generally well-loved by the kids we interact with. I even find something to love and praise in the most annoying and misbehaved kids. If money were no object, I would have had more than the 2 wehave. I imagine my husband and I fostering kids once our own are grown and out of the house.

So, did your parents (and your DH's parents) like kids too? All kids? Did you have a pleasant childhood?

 

[iLander]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first.

You do this too? lol

I do like kids. Truly!

cheers--Sharon

So, did your parents like kids too? All kids? Did you have a pleasant childhood?

 

[jaysonsmom]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first. I teach sunday school, and my husband coaches a lot of my kid's sports. We are generally well-loved by the kids we interact with. I even find something to love and praise in the most annoying and misbehaved kids. If money were no object, I would have had more than the 2 we have. I imagine my husband and I fostering kids once our own are grown and out of the house.

So, did your parents (and your DH's parents) like kids too? All kids? Did you have a pleasant childhood?

I would say that both my husband and I had pretty good childhoods. We're both from families with happily married parents, and even though our parents (both sets Asian) were not particularly affectionate, they showed their love through other ways, such as participation in our extracurricular activities, lots of family outings (camping), tennis, hiking, gardening. All done as a family unit. My husband's parents showed their love in more material ways, such as getting him whatever he desired (to a certain extent) for Christmas gifts, despite being financially strapped. They scrimped and saved to make their 4 kids happy. My in-laws have both passed on, but while alive, thy loved their grandkids the same way, and my parents still love my kids and are very hands on grandparents.

 

[CJ2008]

No, not really...

I wouldn't say I dislike them but I don't automatically like them, either...

Like you, iLander, I think of them as people. And like George Carlin once said "some kids are aholes"

I have a low tolerance for all people, so same with kids...after a while, I want to retreat and be left alone...

But I too will smile at kids or make faces at them to make them laugh, if they're cute, or they smile at me, or they appear friendly.

 

[momhappy]

Kids are fine. Sure, I like them, but that doesn't mean that I like all of them. I sometimes find them delightful - I sometimes find them annoying. I think that's pretty much the case for just about everything. I like diamonds too, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I like all of them just because they are diamonds...

 

[tyty333]

I like kids fine until they give me a reason not to. Kind of the same way I treat adults. Unfortunately, I dont have that connection with
kids that some people have. I think I lost my ability to be silly early on.

 

[baby monster]

There have been exceptions but generally, no I don't like kids.
I don't like to be around them.
I hate hearing my next door neighbors two little girls screaming and yelling constantly in their house and in their yard.

I resent parents who do not control their kids in public ... ESPECIALLY ... the parents who think it's harmful to guide/correct/teach/discipline their kids.

Well-behaved kids are okay, but rare.

I share the blame.
I found out in therapy my discomfort around kids is related to my own childhood of abuse.
I'm pretty sure that, subconsciously, kids bring me back to that time.

Well, let's ask the kid likers about their childhoods.

That's pretty much been my observation. Among the adults I know, those who say they hated their childhood also dislike kids.

I like kids but I also like people in general until they give me a reason not to like them anymore.

 

[House Cat]

I don't like kids, really. I think of them as people, and some I like as individuals, some I do not. I like my own kids (most of the time, lol) but I don't think of kids - as an en masse group - as adorable. I approach kids the same way I do adults; with a wait and see attitude. I don't give them an automatic "like" because they're little.

There I finally said it. When I was young, it was heresy for a woman to admit that. The generation before mine, I think some women were considered insane for that opinion. I feel especially bad for that generation, because they didn't have birth control.

Some people seem to feel that all kids, even those that they don't personally know, are adorable. They like TV commercials with kids, pictures of kids, etc.

Are you one of those people?

No judgement, just curious.

I am right there with you. It is funny because I had this exact conversation with my dad yesterday.

Everyone thinks I am the "kid person" because I had a son at 19, but I am not! I like MY kids. I MIGHT like your kids if they have something likable about them. My best friend's kids are gifted. They are fun. Another friend of mine has a daughter that I love, but I REALLY love that friend, so it creates a bias.

If the child is a total brat, I have a very hard time making allowances in my heart for them. Logically, I know this child is just trying to get their emotional needs met. But I still feel myself recoiling in the child's presence, just as I would in a bratty adult's presence.

It is true that if you are wounded as a child, children may trigger you. I have had this happen to me. When my children reached the ages that were particularly difficult for me during childhood, I would have personal difficulty and have to do an awful lot of work in therapy.

 

[dk168]

I prefer cats and dogs; and babies do nothing to me, whereas I would drool over kittens and puppies.

DK

 

[PintoBean]

Let's put it this way... I'd have had kids in a heartbeat if stork[dot]com offered 100% refunds.

My childhood was not a happy one. My dad is cray. My mom is CRAY cray... My mom often liked reminding me that I was an accident, and had she known what it would be like to have me, she wouldn't have had me. SOoooo healthy... yet she's pushing hard for grandkids - what the...

They "make up" for the cray CRAY cray (dad + mom's crays...) by throwing money at us. We will take it when we need it, but we ALWAYS pay it back and then some, even if they keep insisting it's a gift.

Sooo... this is why I'm not sure I like kids enough to commit to having my own...

 

[Laila619]

Yes, I love kids! Of course, I only have experience with babies and toddlers. But I love kids, mine and other peoples' too. Good thing, because I have four of them.

ETA: before I had my own, I didn't have a lot of patience for them, like if they were crowding an aisle in a store I needed to go down or something like that. But now I'll just smile at how cute they are and go about my business.

 

[OreoRosies86]

Yes, I mostly find children very beautiful and sweet in spirit. I know of a few "mothers" who have biological children but absolutely no connection (or desire to attempt a connection) with the people they willingly brought into this world. I get that not everyone is naturally maternal, but at least try...

 

[Madam Bijoux]

I like them at least 20 feet away from me.

 

[isaku5]

I like them at least 20 feet away from me.

Very clear, Madam!

I might have said the same thing until our granddaughters were born . Initially, it was the same howling, screaming mess that we had endured as parents, but very gradually I saw potential, and I'm all about potential - especially for women.

"Welcome to the world Baby Girl!! We've got places to go and people to meet. I promise you a great time...if you're wise."

 

[mochiko42]

I prefer cats and dogs; and babies do nothing to me, whereas I would drool over kittens and puppies.

DK

Same here,DK ! Give me a cat any day.

I really felt for many years that something was wrong with me because I didnt automatically coo and melt over every baby and child that crossed my path. [emoji33]

I've finally realized that it's because I have low tolerance for people in general. I'm pretty anti-social in that I'm fine at work or when I have a purpose to socialize, but I hate small talk or being out amongst crowds. So it makes sense I have the same low tolerance (or conversely, you could say high standards) for people no matter what their age. I do tolerate and even like the kids of my good friends, though, but I think it's because they are good parents raising good kids. I hate spoiled little emperor-type children - I've seen some kids around here who mistreat
their maid and the parents allow it!

(average happy childhood, now happily married DINKs. Two cats.).

 

[distracts]

I like kids. I tend to like most people until they prove I shouldn't like them. I will say, however, that all the children I see regularly are delightful individuals, well-behaved in public, and certainly no worse than I was as a child when I've seen them in their homes.

BUT I used to not like children under the age of 5. And - here's the funny part - when I'm on hormonal birth control, I go back to not liking them, only to like them again once I'm off it. It's even MORE noticeable with babies - when not on birth control, I'm wild into babies, but when I'm on it, I don't want them anywhere near me and find them really annoying. I have a bunch of friends who say they don't like children, but they've been on hormonal birth control since their teens, and I always wonder - how much of that is you and how much of that is artificial? I don't know. I mean, maybe I just feel this way because to me being on hormonal birth control alters so much about me that I feel it is patently false to how I view myself - every one I have tried has altered my moods, my sex drive/sexual responsiveness (PROFOUNDLY NEGATIVELY, I might add, which was always why I eventually discontinued and tried something else), and to some extent my interests. So I dunno.

We don't have any kids yet, but we're actively planning for them. I have also always wanted to foster or adopt (out of the US adoption system, preferably a sibling group). I don't know. Maybe that's a dumb idea. But the people I usually see fostering children are often religious nutjobs who I wouldn't really trust with children and, idk, I like kids, I do well with them, I love helping people, idk. I don't think my husband would be interested. I've actually never mentioned wanting to foster or adopt to him. Or anyone, really, because it's something my social group would consider really weird.

re: childhood - yes, my parents liked kids too. I think I had a pretty great childhood. Now that I'm an adult, I see my parents every week, my brother every other week, and talk to my mom probably an average of two hours a day, my dad maybe ten minutes a day (he's not really a phone person), my brother about two hours a week + texting/facebook. In a large extended family, my brother and I were separated by a decade on either side from our cousins, and by the time our decade-younger cousins grew up a bit, our decade-older cousins were having kids, so there have always been kids in our family. Our extended family goes on two-week-long vacation together every year. Every job I ever held up until the end of college was assistant-teaching children ranging from 3-13 in some capacity, and that was where I REALLY learned to love children. As assistant teacher, my job was usually to deal with the troublemakers and tantrum-throwers, and golly gee if I just didn't find them SO charming. Most of them just acted out because they didn't understand something and needed a little one-on-one attention. I had a few that had more serious issues (like, adopted crack babies, though I guess that's not the PC term for them) and I could see how they would be exhausting 24/7 but it was also really rewarding to figure out how to help them succeed.

Also, a related anecdote - during my entire wedding, ONE person noticed I had been to busy to drink anything and sat me down and brought me water. My six-year-old ringbearer. Unprompted. It was possibly the most emotionally touching moment of the entire reception. (I know some people don't like kids at weddings, but I remember being a kid and having a distant cousin who I really admired have a no-kids wedding and how HURT I was, so I invited ALL THE KIDS and we had a kids area upstairs overlooking the main reception area, with coloring books and toys and, importantly, babysitters, so no parents had to sit up there watching them.)

 

[arkieb1]

Yes and No. When I was younger I used to be like the pied piper of kids, dogs, cats, animals. Small children would just come and talk to me for no reason. At a party of adults and a few kids I would be the person with the small kids following me around.....

Now I am older and have my own son whom I love dearly I have realised I don't like small children that much at all especially other peoples, probably because many of them are badly behaved and as many members have pointed out so many parents (who are the people who should be blamed) stand there and let them go crazy in public places when there is no good reason to. I am not talking about kids with issues my best friend has two autistic children and she is one of the most patient people I know but people who have kids that they let do whatever they want, just because they don't want to make tough calls as parents or it's too hard to discipline their kids.

 

[madelise]

I love kids. The younger, the better. They make me incredibly happy. So much that I actually want them and I want to steal them all the time from people.

I used to not be this way. I hated children, and freaked out when short things would come near me. I was anxious I'd accidentally hurt them.


And now, well, the only reason I don't steal them is bc I don't want to get arrested haha. BABIES! KIDS! YAY!

 

[canuk-gal]

Yes, I like all kids, and so does my husband. We are the the people who will make funny faces at kids while in line at the grocery store, to make kids laugh. At parties where we don't know a lot of people, we end up chatting to kids versus getting to know the parents first.

You do this too? lol

I do like kids. Truly!

cheers--Sharon

So, did your parents like kids too? All kids? Did you have a pleasant childhood?

HI:

I don't believe I ever discussed it with either parent. Mom was a teacher and most often spoke highly of the students--but then again, she was hard pressed to anything negative. Gave everyone the benefit of the doubt. My Dad frequently said he wasn't prejudiced against anyone--just hated everyone equally! Of course he was kidding--and often told my Mom to bring her difficult students home because, I suppose, he though "we" could help them.

I have three sisters--and growing up, we had our challenges like any busy family whose parents were both employed (many household chores!!); but my folks were kind and generous and supported us. I remain close to my Mom and sisters. (Father long deceased).

I like kids for a myriad of reasons; they are often enthusiastic and interesting and honest and full of life and energy. I embrace that.

cheers--Sharon

 

[NOYFB]

Not particularly, no. DH and I are childfree by choice. That being said, we have 7 nieces and nephews that we adore. But, we also don't want to spend 24/7 with them, or any other kids for that matter. I think babies are cute. In fact, one of my best friends just gave birth today, conceived naturally, after years of trying several rounds of IVF, and I'm ecstatic for her and can't wait to see the little guy. I particularly dislike teenagers/high school kids and at the moment am in a "no social media contact" situation with my 14 year old niece because apparently I embarrass her when I comment or like her pictures.

 

[packrat]

I was kinda meh about most kids until I had my own. Now I appreciate them more, and I can handle them more so than before. Now I can make faces and talk to kids while standing in line or when shopping, whereas before I'd turn around to roll my eyes and then turn back and manage a smile.

Kids frustrate me, make no mistake. Parents frustrate me more I think sometimes. I'll be starting my 4th year at preschool this fall and tho it's not perfect (we have three returning to our special education room, and now we're adding 16 gen ed three year olds OMGGGGGGG it may be a good thing this question came up now rather than September...I may have a different response) I adore the kids. Most of them. The smiles on the non verbal child, and how even tho I am not his one on one that works w/him most of the time, he really likes me. One of the girls from the adjoining room thinks I'm the bees knees, and her mom contacted me several times over the school year to tell me how happy she was that even tho her daughter wasn't in our room, she knew every day when she sent her to school that Miss Missi would love her like her own. The "I love you Miss Missi" pictures hung up behind the desk, the hugs and kisses and snuggles-yeah, that's pretty great.

I wouldn't have been able to work there had I not had my own kids first, and I accept that. I wouldn't have had the patience for it at ALL. There's plenty of people who teach and don't have kids and they do a fabulous job, they love it, love the kids, the kids respond to them and that's fantastic. I would not be one of them. I wasn't really around little kids growing up and I had no clue how to interact w/them.

Teaching preschool has killed any desire for more kids, I'll say that haha. One month into it my first year and I was like yeaaah I for sure know now that there will be no more.

Then there's the kids that don't have the best home life, and sometimes you want to pull your hair out at their behavior...then you have a flash to the home situations and it makes you stop and look at the child differently. There are a few I had a special bond with that...you just want them to know what it's like to be loved and want them to know that school is a safe haven for them.

JD's better w/kids now that we've our own. I don't think he cared for kids much until then. He's big and intimidating looking, and it's funny to see how the kids really respond to him, and he to them, when he's been around the preschool kids.

I'm more comfortable around kids than most adults seems like anymore. Kids don't care who you are, what you look like, what you wear-they just want someone to color with or to serve their spaghetti to or dress up w/them in the red tutu, sombrero and pink high heels with long purple gloves.

 

[KaeKae]

I do like kids. My favorite time would be pre-k and kinder. This is good, since I'm and educator, currently working with this age group.

Of course, I don't live with any of those little people and I'm more or less in charge.

 

[azstonie]

I like them a lot, was a band director for 10 years. Left the teaching profession because I didn't like most of their PARENTS which is probably because they reminded me of *my* cruel and abusive parents.