Countdown begins

[nytemist]

Four days and counting.

A few weeks ago, I asked about hypnotherapy on here to help with my fear of flying; if anyone had experience with it. Unfortunately, I wasn''t really able to afford the sessions.

I leave for Germany on Sunday and the last two weeks have been very rough. The panic attacks are getting worse and I''m now losing sleep. What else do I do? I take Lorazepam before boarding so I go to sleep but 1) I will have a horrble time trying to get through boarding since I''m flying alone and 2) I have a connecting flight and I''m really afraid of having a meltdown during the layover.

I sound like a whiny brat I kow, but what do I do? All I can picture is flipping out and not getting on the plane at all or being too afraid to continue in Iceland and security guards detain me for acting suspicious or working myself up to the point I pass out. I''ve tried to get a handle on this but it''s not going well. I''ve been trying to help this by watching planes in the sky which I don''t like doing.

Thanks for letting me vent and for any advice you have.

 

[dragonfly411]

ny - is there anyone who could go with you to the air port? I don''t think you sound whiny, you do need an answer. Fears are very real, and everyone has to learn to cope in a different way, especially with extreme fears. I have panic attacks over being alone.

Have you tried reading in flight? Would it help do you think, to not be paying attention to everything around you, but to a book instead? Have you talked to a psychologist or therapist about options? Might your doctor be able to prescribe a relaxant for the duration before, during, and on the way home of your trip?

 

[junebug17]

You are most certainly not being a whiny brat!! In fact, you have a true, genuine fear that many others share, and my heart goes out to you. I googled "overcoming fear of flying" and a bunch of websites came up, maybe if you read through them you will find some tips to help you. I feel so badly for you, it''s obvious you are very distressed over this, I wish I had more constructive advice for you. Could a friend at least accompany you to the airport? I would also tell the flight attendant about your fear...one of the articles I read said not to hide your fear or be ashamed of it, let people know about it.

 

[tyty333]

Nytemist,

Have you seen your doc for something like valium or some kind of relaxer for your panic attacks? Xanax?

When you are in the plane definitly let the flight attendants know that you are having panic issues.
(Let them know in advance) I'm sure they have had to deal with this and will know ways to help. I would
also let the people on your row know if they seem open to talking. Having someone/something to distract
you from your thoughts will be helpful. Get one (or two) of those squishy stress balls for your hands. Go
to town on them.

When you are in Iceland I would also let the gate people know that you have issues and that they must make
you get on that flight! Being stuck where you are not suspose to be is not going to help you. Here is your logic
...you have to fly out of there either way so you might as well keep going to your destination. While you are waiting
I would not just sit there. I would get up and look around. Go look at magazines or do something.

Stay away from any caffeine before/during the trip.

I have panic attacks while driving on big/busy highways so I know where you are coming from. This is something
that helps me. Breath in through your nose and out through your mouth. Try to concentrate on your breathing.
(just think you on that plane are actually safer then all us folks driving around).

Hopefully some psychologist types will have some advice for you.

I wish you the best of luck and a lovely trip (I'm jealous)!

tyty

 

[nytemist]

Years ago I took part in a phobia study at a hospital and there was never a real reason for me being afraid. The doctor told me that most people who fear flying also hate amusement park rides, but I love them. Heights don''t bother me. I''m not claustraphobic and that''s with being caught in an elevator a couple of times. Some people think it may be the loss of control issue and maybe it is, but I''m ok with other people driving or being on a bus trip.

I was first on a plane at 7-8 years old. I remember being so scared the whole time and from what my parents said nothing would calm me down. I remember getting to my grandparents house in Louisiana and hiding in a closet and screaming I didn''t want to get back in the plane. I didn''t try to fly again until my high school exchange trip. We took a bus from Boston to leave from JFK. I was shaking, nauseous, crying and had a total panic attack before boarding and took off running. Apparently, one schaperone and a teacher had to come find me with some airport security and I was hysterical and fighting. They had to call someone from the medical staff to basically tranquilize me. I don''t remember any of it. Next I remember is waking up in the hotel room in Italy. It was years after this that I did the phobia study and talked to my doctor about it. She suggested Lorazepam for the next time I was going to fly, which wasn''t until 2004 when I went to San Fancisco with DH (still dating at the time) This drug works well for me. I take it when I know I''m going to start losing it and depending on the dosage I''m out before taking off. We went to London for our honeymoon in 2006. Took my meds early, had to be held up by DH and a flight attendent to get to my seat and was out until just before we landed.

It''s different this time since I''ll be alone. It''s making the crazy panic side of my head even worse. Yesterday evening I couldn''t catch my breath and started to cry for a few minutes and DH couldn''t do anything to make me feel better. Even now writing about what''s happened in the past is making my hands shake. DH is going to take me to the aiport and my best friend said he would escort me through as far as he can, possibly right to the plane with a detailed letter from my doctor, since he understands my fear more than DH does (BF is terrified of heights and spiders) He might have to help me talk to the agents since talking will be hard for me.

I do know some repetative meditation that I use until I eventually go to sleep with the drugs. Back in August when I made the reservation I thought I would be able to do this, now I don''t know.

 

[luv2sparkle]

I dont think you are being a whiny brat either. Not at all. Is this trip for business? Anyway you can get out of it? If you are that panicked, I would avoid it. Why put yourself thru that? You
can''t change how you feel overnight and it sounds like a nightmare. Yes, you can take drugs and you would live thru it, but if you dont have to, why do it.

If you must, I would take the drugs and bring an ipod. I don''t like to fly but can manage it, but must have the ipod so I can close my eyes and focus on something else.

Getting past phobias and fears is not a quick fix thing. It''s a process. Give yourself permission to take it slow if you can.

 

[princesss]

Would you be willing to ask for help when you''re on the plane? Most flight attendants have had to deal with things like this before, and the more prepared they are, the better help they can be to you. Just try flagging one down, or talking to the person at the gate. I find that communication with stuff like this is key.

Also, I would try contacting your doctor about short-term anti-anxiety meds, not just sleeping pills. Going around in a fog may be better than going around in a panic.

Also, do you have a friend you could call during your layover? Maybe some distraction and having somebody who knows you to calm you down would help.

 

[tyty333]

Another thing you may want to do is type up a letter with an explanation of your panic issue and all your flight information
on it. If you get to a point where you cant talk (due to drugs) you may need to give this information to someone
(flight attendant or gate attendant) to make sure you make your flights. A name tag and emergency phone numbers
probably wouldnt hurt either.

I also thing some drugs that would relax you until you got on the flight might be better than totally knocking you
out.

 

[nytemist]

Luv2sparkle- actually this is supposed to be my vacation, can you believe it? My brother lives there and he''s taking some time off and I have wanted to visit him for years so he has invited me. That''s the sad thing- I want to travel and see everywhere I can but flying is the only way to get there. I love driving and have driven around a lot of the US.

Princess, Lorazepam is an anxiety med. Depending on the dose, it can calm you, make you sort of dazed or knock you out. I plan on calling the airline and talk with someone. I keep trying to tell myself that if I can deal with this, I should be albe to handle anything else. My mother was telling me that Whoopi Goldberg got over her fear of flying a couple of months ago by just flying. My uncle is afraid buy made it up here for my wedding. I have to make myself do it. I have to let this out somewhere since I think my husband is getting tired of episodes.

 

[purrfectpear]

Ach tung, mein kleines erschrockenes Kätzchen !

You vil fly, und you vil like it !!!

 

[luv2sparkle]

Nytemist-I feel so bad you are struggling with this. I wish I could go with you and hold your hand. I''ll be praying for you. Let us know how it goes.

 

[packrat]

I''m sorry! I don''t have any brilliant words of wisdom either.

I''ve only flown once by myself, a little over 10 years ago. I was petrified, almost passed out, and paid extra to have a nonstop flight. I didn''t fly again until JD and I went on vacation in 2002-I worked for a psychiatrist at the time, and talked to Dr about my fear, practically getting hysterical in his office. He wrote me a prescription for Lorazepam, and it helped a lot. I took 1/2 the dose, and while I was still scared, I wasn''t having a break down. My husband however was scared out of his wits and refused to take anything. We flew again to Vegas w/my parents a year later and I enjoyed it a lot with my trusty pills to take the edge off. Husband again refused and was miserable. I wonder if the more often you do it, the easier it gets??? Maybe being knocked out and not really experiencing any of it/facing the fear, plays a part in it? You don''t really get a chance to tell yourself Hey, it''s really not that bad.

 

[nytemist]

I heard from my friend and he talked to people from the TSA and they said he could get a pass with permission from the airline to escort me to the plane. Wish he could do this at Keflavik too, but at least he can be there for me at the beginning.

Unfortunately I kind of lost it at work yesterday, as a another woman in my office decided to tell me about how much turbulence she had going to Japan. She glossed right over all us saying please don''t describe that to me. Grrrrr.

I tried to meditate but couldn''t turn my brain off. I haven''t even started to pack yet since it reminds me. I know I have to keep talking myself into believing I will be fine for the next two days.

I have to stop babbbling.

 

[Erin]

Oh dearie, I don''t have the magic words to make it better for you. Just know that most of us have a fear of something and it is very real.
I guess try to keep in the moment and do your calming exercises and take it one minute at a time. It''s no fun for you or for others to endure that helpless reaction, but only you can use the tools to do something about it. Every minute that you conquer your fear is a Success and keep building on that strength. If you can do it for one minute, you can do it for two minutes. After five minutes it''s rinse and repeat. You can do this. You''ve flown before. You know you can succeed because you''ve done it before. I wish you all the strength you can muster to keep in the moment and remain calm.

 

[nytemist]

Thank you all who listened to my ranting and gave advice. I''m leaving work for the day and probably won''t be on the computer during the weekend as I have a lot to do.

If you don''t see any posts from me until Oct 30th, you know I didn''t back out.

Wish me luck!

 

[dragonfly411]

ny - just think ahead to how much fun you''ll have

 

[VRBeauty]

I missed your thread the first time around, and it looks like I missed the chance to wish you well this time too. But just in case...

I''ll be thinking of you and wishing you serenity for your trip.

And I hope that in a few weeks, we''ll hear about how each leg of the trip was easier than the one before it, and all about what a wonderful time you had visiting your brother in Germany!