the great suit vs. tux debate.

[lulu66]

ok, we''re having the great suit vs. tux debate in our household & need some outsider opinions. here''s a quick kinda pro-con list for both (for us).

SUIT:
pro: FI recently purchased a very nice suit (the nicest one he''s ever had) and would like to wear it for the wedding, i like the way suits look as wedding attire, this one is tailored to FI so the fit would be perfect
con: not sure about the other groomsmens suits; if they own one, what it looks like, if they would wear one after the wedding (the profession of our groomsmen ranges from cook to writer, so not very "professional" in their everyday dress). probably wouldn''t match & bridesmaids are wearing matching dresses. what shirt/tie combo to put them in to make them cohesive

TUX:
pro: what i''ve always imagined groom etc wearing; all would match (except groom in white tie/gm in black tie); can all rent same tux (they are spread throughout the country)
con: FI rented tux wouldn''t fit as nice as his tailored suit; more money--he already owns the suit

i''ll attach a pic of FI''s suit & the tux style we''re going for below. and just fyi the bridesmaids are wearing black cocktail length taffeta dresses.

 

[lulu66]

here''s a pic of his suit (in the foreground). it''s black w/a blue pinstripe. but not a black-black as evidenced by the black corduroy jacket behind it. if you voted for this option, would love some shirt/tie suggestions.

 

[lulu66]

and here''s the tux look. groomsmen would have black ties.

 

[megumic]

we''re doing suits, so i''m partial. just an idea to throw out there - men''s wearhouse has suit sales (and so does brooks brother''s outlet) where it''s buy one get one 50% off, or at BB they come down to around $200-250/suit during sales. So we''re going to buy a portion of each groom''s suit as their gift, and have them contribute the cost of renting a tux or less. That way they walk away with a suit for the cost of renting a tux! Of course we choose the suit though...

 

[slg47]

how formal is your wedding going to be? for a more formal, you might want to go with the tuxes...

also it might be hard to find suits that would match your FI''s suit since his is black with blue pinstripe? maybe the groomsmen could all wear plain black suits?

what color are your bridesmaid dresses?

and...most importantly what would look best with your dress???

 

[lulu66]

Date: 5/19/2010 6:23:46 PM
Author: slg47
how formal is your wedding going to be? for a more formal, you might want to go with the tuxes...


also it might be hard to find suits that would match your FI''s suit since his is black with blue pinstripe? maybe the groomsmen could all wear plain black suits?


what color are your bridesmaid dresses?


and...most importantly what would look best with your dress???

--my weddings not going to be super duper formal. afternoon church wedding w/an evening outdoor reception, buffet-style dinner.
--as for matching FI suit that''s one of my sticking points...my bridesmaids match, shouldn''t the groomsmen (which is not an option if we choose suits; they might "go together" but they will not all be the same)
--BM dresses are short black taffeta dresses
--as for what looks best w/my dress?? IDK, either would be fine i think?? (i''ll attach a pic of my dress & the BM dress, maybe that will help). AHHHH, i''m so confused!!!!!

and megumic, thanks for the info on the sales, that''s a possibility.

here''s the bridesmaid dress:

 

[lulu66]

here''s me in the sample (mine''s ivory, not white):

 

[Indylady]

I love your dress.

I think it would go best with the tux.

 

[caribqueen]

I vote for tux. That picture actually looks just like the one that my FI chose. Our wedding is formal though.

 

[sillyberry]

Your dress is gorgeous and looks great on you!

Anyway, I have no opinion on the suit v. tux debate, but just wanted to throw out there that I don''t think the suits need to "match" just because the bridesmaids'' dresses do. My BFF''s groomsmen all wore khaki suits, and even though they didn''t match identically, no one looked unmatched, if that makes sense.

 

[ilovesparkles]

OK, FI and I just bought his suit this past weekend. We have a VERY limited budget and thus could not buy anything just fancy. We first tried Men''s Warehouse, quoted $299 for the jacket and pants, and the guy made a rude comment. Disgusted, we thought for a minute and said screw it lets try JC Pennys. We found his suit, and with shirt, tie, and undergarments for under $200. This was with a 20% discount for signing up for their credit card which we will pay off and cut up of course.

So, FI wears his beautiful suit, and the groomsmen buy a decent suit at the cost of a little more than a rental. You get the suit look, the groomsmen have something they can continue to use and enjoy for a little extra dough. Our groomsmen are just buying a specific shirt and black dockers and are thrilled. But our wedding is not terribly formal.

 

[MagsyMay]

I'm for suits, but I may be biased because that's what we're doing! FI is wearing a gray suit, and his best man (only attendant), my brothers, and father will wear black suits.

I think as long as your FI is set off in one way or another and the rest of the GM will be sufficiently uniform in attire (whether by tie, tie/shirt combo, or suit color), it will look fine. I'm having an evening wedding that will otherwise be fairly formal, but FI loves nice suits, has never liked any tux he's ever worn, and wants to feel comfortable and look great. So suit it will be!

Then again, I'm apparently not with the norm when it comes to wedding traditions, but I say, do whatever you and your FI feel most comfortable with! If you're one of the people that care about identical outfits and perfect matched photos with equal numbers of BMs/GMs etc., well then tux is probably the way to go!

 

[slg47]

hmm this is tough. maybe you can get a sense of what the groomsmen have in terms of suits? if they all have a black suit maybe you could ask them to get shirts/ties that would go? also you could go with blue for them to match the blue in your FI''s suit (or you could get a color that would go with your wedding...)

also everyone on PS is so pretty and has the prettiest dresses!

 

[cutes814]

i voted tux. just cuz how often do you get to wear tuxes? and they look soooooo sexy...

 

[EyeElle]

I voted tux. I like either option as I do think that both work for a wedding.
But I chose tux in this particular case, because I prefer the look of it. I am not a fan of stripped suits for weddings - for me personally its to casual for the occasion and something that one would wear everyday. I always envisioned a solid colour suit if one was to choose that option for a wedding.

 

[monkeyprincess]

Initially, I was set on having the guys just wear suits because I like that look and my fiance has several nice ones. But I recently changed my mind, and we are now going to have him and the groomsmen rent tuxes. I just thought it would look best in pictures if the guys are matching (even if the guys were all to wear black, you would still see slight differences), and I want my fiance to feel like he is wearing something special and different for his wedding, and not just going to the office or court. We are trying to keep it a little less formal with yellow ties though.

ETA: Your dress looks pretty formal,s o that is another reason I would vote tux.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

I like suits! We had our groomsmen wear dark suits and it looked great. We bought their ties, so they had dark suits, white shirts, and green ties (kind of a mix between lime green and avacado green). It looked really nice and coordinating. I also had the bridesmaids pick their own dresses so we weren''t going for perftectly cookie-cutter matchy-matchy, we wanted coordinating.

 

[Natylad]

I love good suits...When they are perfectly tailored, they can look even more elegant than tuxedos but...more fresh and modern... In general, i never liked the tux look...

 

[sammie83]

i say go with suits... unless you have any fashionista guys that would only have a different looking edgy suit, most guys have the same kind of black suit..then you can just tell them to wear white shirts and you can get them matching ties and pocket squares as their gift (they have some great sets of these on amazon).. the groom can still wear a tux even if the guys don''t (i think this is what we''re going to do).. and these days with people so low on cash i don''t want anyone to struggle paying for something that they can''t afford or have someone special not be able to be in my wedding because they couldn''t buy the outfit..

i think you''ll find, that even if your girls weren''t in the same exact dress, but all in the same color palette that it would look just as beautiful (or moreso) and formal as the matchy matchy thing

 

[TooPatient]

I voted for the tux.

Your dress is beautiful and rather formal looking. I think the tux would look better with it -- the suit might look a little too casual/everyday with it. Also, your BM dresses are classic and elegant looking and would look amazing next to tuxes.

There are more & less formal tux styles out there with many cuts of jacket (tail coat, cut away, stroller), shirt options (French cuffs, mandarin collar, winged coller), and more (ascot, waist coat, bow tie, cummerbund).


brides.com has a great glossary of terms and renting/purchasing advice.

 

[Clairitek]

I much much prefer a suit these days for weddings unless the wedding is black tie. We were in the same position as you... my DH had a slightly more than year old suit that was purchased for him by his parents when he started interviewing. I love the way it fits him so I knew I wanted him to wear it and that it would be formal enough to with my dress. We just asked his friends to wear a suit and a white shirt and we provided the ties (all blues to coordinate in some way with the BMs). We got lucky that they all wore darker suits. I asked my BMs to wear a blue dress, knee length. No other guidelines. I am not much a matchy matchy person so I loved the way everyone looked together. I think it still looked weddingy enough but everyone was allowed to wear what made them comfortable within our two guidelines. I attached a picture. My two MOHs had already changed out of their dresses for some reason so only 4 of the 6 were still in their blue dresses, but you get the idea.

So theres my story...

When it comes to your choice, I was 1000% about the suits and then I saw that your BM dresses were black. For some reason, I just imagined your BMs and GMs not quite jiving as much with a range of different blacks, you know what I mean? How some black fabrics aren't quite the same as others. At least if you did those tuxes then things would be consistent. On the other hand, I'm not sure those BM dresses are tux formal, ya know? They are really cute dresses, but I feel like the BMs in a tux might be too much to go with those BM dresses. Ugh! I know I'm probably not helping, just thinking aloud I suppose.

If forced, I say go with the suit. Get your FI a realllly nice quality shirt and tie to wear underneath the jacket. Maybe a french cuff shirt and some cufflinks? Your dress is beautiful and I think it will go well with either a suit or tux. Since your reception isn't super formal and your ceremony is in the afternoon a suit will not seem out of place, IMO.

 

[elrohwen]

I''m really anti-tux. At least I was for my own wedding - I think other guys look good in them, if they''re fitted well, but they were just too formal for my wedding. I also didn''t like the way the rental tuxes looked on DH.

 

[winelover23]

Date: 5/20/2010 2:10:32 PM
Author: Clairitek

I much much prefer a suit these days for weddings unless the wedding is black tie. We were in the same position as you... my DH had a slightly more than year old suit that was purchased for him by his parents when he started interviewing. I love the way it fits him so I knew I wanted him to wear it and that it would be formal enough to with my dress. We just asked his friends to wear a suit and a white shirt and we provided the ties (all blues to coordinate in some way with the BMs). We got lucky that they all wore darker suits. I asked my BMs to wear a blue dress, knee length. No other guidelines. I am not much a matchy matchy person so I loved the way everyone looked together. I think it still looked weddingy enough but everyone was allowed to wear what made them comfortable within our two guidelines. I attached a picture. My two MOHs had already changed out of their dresses for some reason so only 4 of the 6 were still in their blue dresses, but you get the idea.

So theres my story...

When it comes to your choice, I was 1000% about the suits and then I saw that your BM dresses were black. For some reason, I just imagined your BMs and GMs not quite jiving as much with a range of different blacks, you know what I mean? How some black fabrics aren't quite the same as others. At least if you did those tuxes then things would be consistent. On the other hand, I'm not sure those BM dresses are tux formal, ya know? They are really cute dresses, but I feel like the BMs in a tux might be too much to go with those BM dresses. Ugh! I know I'm probably not helping, just thinking aloud I suppose.

If forced, I say go with the suit. Get your FI a realllly nice quality shirt and tie to wear underneath the jacket. Maybe a french cuff shirt and some cufflinks? Your dress is beautiful and I think it will go well with either a suit or tux. Since your reception isn't super formal and your ceremony is in the afternoon a suit will not seem out of place, IMO.

Why you gotta talk trash C-tek?

 

[monkeyprincess]

Question for you lulu - do you know who makes the tux in the picture you attached or is it just a picture of the look you''re going for? I love it and am trying to find something similar for our wedding....

 

[Prana]

We chose to do suits because it costs almost as much if not just as much to rent a tux, plus, every guy needs a black suit for his wardrobe!

 

[yssie]

Goodness, I was set on tuxes until I saw your photo c-tek! Now I''m reconsidering - the non-matchy looks fantastic, and I''m not generally a huge matchy-matchy person anyway so... I like!!


My BMs are going to be in brown, they''re choosing their own shades/dresses, and I''ll be in pale yellow - I''m thinking dark grey suits...

 

[PumpkinPie]

I voted for suits but I''m pretty informal - it really depends on the tone you want to set at your wedding.

 

[Miss Sparkly]

I voted tux. You (usually) only have one shot with the wedding and it''s much better to love your day and your photos then to wish you had gone for the tux.

 

[lulu66]

Date: 5/20/2010 4:55:52 PM
Author: monkeyprincess
Question for you lulu - do you know who makes the tux in the picture you attached or is it just a picture of the look you''re going for? I love it and am trying to find something similar for our wedding....

hmmmm, i don''t...i''ve had it saved on my computer forever. it probably came from the men''s warehouse page (somewhere) or project wedding or the knot...not sure that helps :/ sorry!

thanks for all your opinions! no decision has been made in our household yet. i''ll keep you posted & keep the opinions coming!!

 

[Clairitek]

Good luck making a choice Lulu!

Date: 5/20/2010 7:35:51 PM
Author: yssie
Goodness, I was set on tuxes until I saw your photo c-tek! Now I''m reconsidering - the non-matchy looks fantastic, and I''m not generally a huge matchy-matchy person anyway so... I like!!


My BMs are going to be in brown, they''re choosing their own shades/dresses, and I''ll be in pale yellow - I''m thinking dark grey suits...

Thanks! It happened almost by accident though. We didn''t even ask them to wear dark suits, just a suit, any suit! I''m grateful that they were all dark.. black, blue, or grey. I had an awesome time picking out the ties too.