Am I out of line here?

[Smurfysmiles]

So for the ceremony the church gives us a coordinator to help us figure things out and so on. Well I had been trying to figure out the time of the rehearsal at our church so I could let fi''s mom know when to schedule the dinner for. I emailed the coordinator and she acted like I was asking all of these out of line things and says "We already discussed this and we decided on 6:00 at ****. To which I reply, "no we have actually not discussed that at all but thank you for letting me know." So I''m sitting here going where in the world is ****, I have no idea where that is at. So I email a friend of mine who works at the church as a youth minister. Well we have 2 campuses, north and south in town (about a 25-30 minute drive from one to the other), for our church and I knew this. Well friend says "Ohhh ****, that''s at the south campus...but isn''t your wedding at the north campus? Why would she schedule it there?" To which I reply "Wow I have no idea."
SO Long story short:
We''re getting married at one church and having our rehearsal dinner at another church. Raise your hand if you can see why this might be a problem! People could potentially show up at the wrong church the day of if they do not understand this. Now I''m not trying to say our bridal party isn''t smart, it''s just I know things can get lost in translation and I just don''t get why we can''t have it at the place of the ceremony to begin with!

Ugh, this may have been more of a vent than anything but ugh. Also she said "off the top of my head the rehearsal is at 6pm" I asked her to email back when she knew for sure because I didn''t want to give the wrong time to the caterer for the rehearsal dinner. Yeah..this was 5 days ago. Haven''t heard a thing since. Wonderful.

 

[jcarlylew]

smurfy - while it sound like your coordinator is being a PITA, i am sure she will pull it all together for you. As far as rehersal goes, as long as you are able to do a walk through (even if its not at the right location), your BP will be just fine. I was in a wedding this weekend and we didnt have any walk through at all, but it will worked out in the end no one even noticed we walked out the wrong way

give her one more day and then follow up with her. and if you still can''t get ahold of her, maybe you can talk to the office manager?

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I really hope so

My friend mentioned if she can''t get it together that he would help me connect with one of the other wedding coordinators that he used for his own wedding

 

[Lilac]

Date: 10/12/2009 11:11:11 AM
Author: jcarlylew
smurfy - while it sound like your coordinator is being a PITA, i am sure she will pull it all together for you. As far as rehersal goes, as long as you are able to do a walk through (even if its not at the right location), your BP will be just fine. I was in a wedding this weekend and we didnt have any walk through at all, but it will worked out in the end no one even noticed we walked out the wrong way

give her one more day and then follow up with her. and if you still can''t get ahold of her, maybe you can talk to the office manager?

I agree. I understand why it''s annoying to have it in two different places, and the coordinator does sound kind of unhelpful, but I don''t think it''s worth making a big deal out of it. Just make sure your bridal party knows where to actually show up on the wedding day and I''m sure as long as you do the walk through everything will go just fine.

Good luck with this coordinator - hopefully she was just having a busy couple of days and she will get more helpful - otherwise (if it really gets bad or frustrating) I agree you should try to talk to a manager or someone above her.

 

[lucyandroger]

Have you asked her about the location? It may be as simple as her mistaking you for another bride as you mentioned she was speaking "off the top of [her] head."

In any case, it never hurts to ask. Just be polite and ask her if there is any way you can have the rehearsal at the same church as the wedding.

I agree it would be annoying to rehearse in a location 25-30 minutes away!

 

[oddoneout]

Sorry for the stress. I''m sure things will work out.

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

I am sure things will be fine. There may be another rehearsal that evening as well - so they may need to have you at the other campus.

I''ve been to many weddings where there was no walk-thru beforehand and things went perfectly. As long as you are crystal clear on the day of location with your BP you shouldn''t have any problems.

You must be getting very excited - your big day is approaching very quickly!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I am getting excited but at the same time am SOOOO ready to just be married already
It's like as soon as I get rid of one stress inducer, another one is lurking around the corner ready to pop out at me ahhh!!!!

eta: we are the only wedding scheduled that weekend at our north campus church :-\ Hmmmm

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

Date: 10/12/2009 4:01:12 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved
I am getting excited but at the same time am SOOOO ready to just be married already
It''s like as soon as I get rid of one stress inducer, another one is lurking around the corner ready to pop out at me ahhh!!!!

eta: we are the only wedding scheduled that weekend at our north campus church :- Hmmmm

Ha! Just wait until you are only a few weeks away - I was very on top of all my planning and I am still feeling similar stresses. As soon as one project is completed another crops up. I hope you have a supportive BP because mine are the ones totally stepping up, taking care of business and generally responsible for de-stressing me.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

In FACT, looking at the calendar for both churches, the only thing scheduled the friday before our wedding is an exercise group at 8am! lol

 

[Smurfysmiles]

So the rehearsal is at the church where the wedding is now! This is what the coordinator wrote back...

"I should not reply without my notes. Since your wedding is at the north campus of course we want rehearsal there. Sorry. The sanctuary would be available at 6 since there is no service at the North Campus."

Oi vey.

 

[meresal]

Date: 10/13/2009 11:21:15 AM
Author: Smurfyimproved
So the rehearsal is at the church where the wedding is now! This is what the coordinator wrote back...

''I should not reply without my notes. Since your wedding is at the north campus of course we want rehearsal there. Sorry. The sanctuary would be available at 6 since there is no service at the North Campus.''

Oi vey.

I think she replied nicely and she apologized. Let by''gons be by''gons and move past.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Oh I know she apologized nicely and I''ll let it go, I''m just hoping she replies with her notes from now on is all

 

[tyty333]

Date: 10/13/2009 11:21:15 AM
Author: Smurfyimproved
So the rehearsal is at the church where the wedding is now! This is what the coordinator wrote back...

''I should not reply without my notes. Since your wedding is at the north campus of course we want rehearsal there. Sorry. The sanctuary would be available at 6 since there is no service at the North Campus.''

Oi vey.

Well, glad she came to her senses! I too thought maybe she had mixed you up with another bride. I''m glad
its finally all straightened out!

 

[meresal]

Date: 10/13/2009 11:29:24 AM
Author: Smurfyimproved
Oh I know she apologized nicely and I''ll let it go, I''m just hoping she replies with her notes from now on is all

In a perfect world...

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Date: 10/13/2009 11:34:00 AM
Author: meresal

Date: 10/13/2009 11:29:24 AM

Author: Smurfyimproved

Oh I know she apologized nicely and I''ll let it go, I''m just hoping she replies with her notes from now on is all

In a perfect world...

hahahha touche meresal

 

[lucyandroger]

yep, there''s bound to be miscommunications at some point, especially when planning a wedding which requires so much coordination between different vendors and the venue and what not. It''s best to just keep your cool, clarify, and move on. Glad it worked out for you!

 

[rhbgirl24]

I''m sorry you had to deal with that! But I can tell you I''ve gone thru it. Our wedding planner has done some of the same. Like we had an hour long details meeting... and when she finally got all the invoicing to me, LIKE 3 WEEKS LATER, none of it was listed.... urg. But no worries... all will be fine!

 

[Italiahaircolor]

While it might not make sense to you...I am sure your coordinator has been doing this for a long time and knows what works.

There may be an event at the actual ceremony church the Friday before your wedding...or whatever...but I''d put faith in this woman.